BmOhearn's diary

felici- you sound so amazed about the weather. its funny. i keep forgetting that its always warm where you are. haha. I hate the extreme cold because i cant get outside and exercise. But i also hate the extreme hot..(80 degrees fahrenheit plus) because i hate sweating from heat. (its an anxiety thing i think. i freak when i sweat for no reason!)


So today....horrible food. i'm disappointed in myself. I ate at a fast food place. Other than that it was O.K. I am bloated and feel horrible about it. Dan bought me a book today. it is the complete works of William Shakespeare. I love shakespeare. The book has 1229 pages. 37 books, plus a collection (not full, but the better somes) of poems and sonnets. I want to get the other book that was only his sonnets and poems. Right now i decided to read the first book in there. The Tempest. Which is a story having to do with ship wreck, and deception...blah blah blah. I dont understand every single word he writes. But i can get a pretty detailed picture of whats going on in each passage. I enjoy it.

I am going to do a few sit ups in a little while, and then hop in the shower.
Tomorrow night i have off as well, and i am going to visit my mother.

I feel fat and gross. and i need to lose 2 lbs this week. i need to whip myself in shape! Tomorrow will be different.

Good night!
 
Hehe.

We call it cold when it is under 15 or so degrees C, which we do get. That's like 40-50 degrees F. 80 degrees F equals 26 degrees C - isn't that idyllic - like beautiful spring, pleasant no worries summer? Actually that's what it is here right now. I wouldn't try to exercise fast in the full sun until it's cooler but I feel pretty happy about the weather. I really don't call it hot till the 90's at least and don't feel too bothered till around 97 or so I think. As long as the nights are cool I'm ok. The difference in our two climates is massive.

fsaiidni said:
Hey bm, just droppin in 2 say hi, ya it sucks to have bad 4 u food because the satisfaction isn't really there like with a bigger meal, plus bad food=bad for you so you know the drill...enjoy a day or so of it then jump back to the healthy stuff ! =-)
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This is great advice.
 
felici- it is so different to me. I would DIE in 97 weather. if it is in the 90's at all... i'm dying, and moody. I'd stay inside with the a.c. blasting! The advice from fsaiidni is great. i need to jump back into the healthy stuff.
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So i am feeling pretty good i guess. I ate horribly which is upsetting me, because i wasnt sure why i was doing it. But i called my father today :eek:
and it went pretty well. I'm missing out a lot my my sister's life. She can talk up a storm now! full sentences and everything. I'm so happy. I might go see them on Monday when i get out of school. I miss them so much! I think i have been eating bad because of stress. Getting the bad father relationship out, makes me want to eat healthier. i think i gained all this weight in the first place b/c of how bad i was feeling. Once i see my dad again... things will be going well. As it is...i have my job, and i'm doing ok in school... so thats all there is to it. I will finally be at peace with my life! I'm going to start doing the right things now...(with eating and exercise)

I have eaten bad all week. But Friday/Saturday/and Sunday are all LONG work days. So i wont be eating much at all. No money= No food when i'm away from home. There's not very much to make sandwiches in my house. So i have to live with what i got.

I hope monday at my dad's house goes well. I really miss them. My family means so much to me.
 
im very happy to hear about your up and coming visit to se your lil cute lil sis :p i hope you have a loverley time huni!
and dont worry about the bad food choices..this week is nearly over and a new one is about to begin - start it with good choices and it will end with good choices.
good luck :)
 
Sophie: I am back from my visit... and i had an awesome time. family means the world to me. And i love my sister so much. she really is the cutest thing ever.

felici: Thanks for the concern. My family visit was great.

bgs: I'm so happy i went

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Hey everyone! i just got back from visiting with the family. It was great. I only spent about 3 hours there. But i wanted more. I havent seen them for a month or so. I cried the entire way home. First off, i was scared that my sister would forget who i was. She didnt. She saw me and gave me 5 million kisses and hugs. (she's 3 remember). She talked to me for a few minutes. She speaks so well. Full sentences and everything. she sat on my lap, played ball with me, and read a book. I went with her to go to bed b/c she didnt want her mom or dad. Just me. My parents came in of course to say goodnight. She was hugging me and my dad tapped me on the shoulder to tell me that i should leave the room so Gilli will fall asleep. She would NOT let go of hugging me. She said "No daddy. Dont touch my Brandy" Then she kept saying OVER and OVER and OVER again..."Brandy, dont go home. Stay here with me brandy. please. i love you. Dont go home" I broke down in tears. I felt like such a bad sister. But i promised her that i will be back really really soon. And i would bring her a present. (i'm going to buy her a toy with my first check.) And i will save money to bring her to movies when a good one comes out. I stayed with her until she fell asleep. Now i can't stop thinking about her. There were a few days during that month that i just sat and cried holding her pictures b/c i missed her so damn much. Like right now, i have all her pictures right next to me. I didnt want to go home today. I really wanted to stay with her. But i had to go home. I have work in the morning. I really will do everything with her that i can. I love her to death. Same with my little brother. Chris is 14 now. He's a guy... so he doesnt really want to chill with his older sister, at least not in front of other people. But i might take him to a movie too.

I will visit my family as much as i can. I have worked so much lately...but the money will make up for it. Speaking of money. I owed so many family members money...but now some things have been figured out. Since my mom still pays my father child support...90 a week...My dad takes a large portion of that every month and puts it towards what i owe my grandparents, and then my dad. I get 120 of it a month. So thats like 1.5 weeks of the child support. It definately helps since i owe my mom and my boyfriend lots of money. I can pay them off, and my bills...i'll be all set.

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Well i'm really sorry that i just babbled about nothing any of you care about. Thats whats up with my life right now. i miss my family. I dont know if i'm ready to grow up yet. But i have no choice. I need to start making better decisions. Healthier...and more responsible.
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Well...food wise. I feel like i've eaten pretty badly. But i really dont eat much. For the past few days...i've had 1 or 2 meals a day. I've been working my butt off. And Today...

Breakfast: half of a plain bagel with peanut butter
Lunch: 2 slices of pepper and onion pizza.
snack: a few nacho chips
Dinner: half of a chicken and potato dinner at the 99 restaurant. It was delicious.

Its really not that bad. But worse then i want to be eating. So tomorrow is a new day. And i have the chance to do anything. I saw my friend the other day... who has a REALLY flat stomach. i wish i had her tummy. So part of my way of proving to myself and everyone else i know that i am more adult..

be more responsible with my money
work on time.
finish college with great grades

And the one that means a lot to me...

Get to my goal weight. Prove my self control.

Tomorrow's goals:

Breakfast- a bowl of cereal if anything
Lunch- Nothing. (i'm going to be at work)
Dinner- i dont know. Just a VERY small portion of what Dan's family is having.

Drink- i pretty much live off of sprite at work. I'll switch it to diet coke at work tomorrow. Or at least i'll try. I hate diet coke. I only like diet pepsi. But i'll give it a shot. I wont drink the water there. i need something that will satisfy my tastes. So i dont snack everything. I'd rather drink sprite then eat a bunch of food.

I finished my english paper for this week. I have to start both of my term projects soon too. Maybe tomorrow night.

oh yeah. Another goal this week: Earlier bed times. I've been pretty good with it. But i want to keep it up.

The new DDR comes out tomorrow! Yay for exercise!!!

Have a good night everyone!
 
I am really glad you enjoyed your time with your family so much. :)

I am really glad you are getting things sorted out financially. :)

As far as food goes, I feel concerned that not having proper meals will almost certainly lead to you overeating some other time. Breakfast matters heaps, and lunch matters too. If you restrict the amount of food you eat to the extent that you intend, you might get a loss, but it will be short term. Unless you start eating more then you won't get the flat stomach you want. Instead you will probably regain weight you have already worked to lose. There are heaps of different things that would care for your body properly. I don't think it's lack of information that's stopping you from eating better though - please tell us if you need to actually know more about what you could eat.

I know your weight matters to you, otherwise I wouldn't bother saying this.

Your little sister sounds so gorgeous. Did ever tell you that my parents got a baby boy when I was in first year Uni? I kind of know what it's like to be the grown up sister of someone you want to look after. I think it's a bit harder for you because you have spent so much time with your sister already. :) Anyway, I'm sure you still have heaps of rewarding time with her to come.

It's wonderful that things are well sorted out with your family now. :):)

It sounds like you are working really hard on your studies too - and managing bedtimes!! Good on you! :)
 
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lol kids are so cute :)

Good to see a responsible youngster wanting to pay back what they owe. So many people just think the world owes them a favour and everyone has done them wrong.

Awesome work on the weight loss!
 
heya,

I know what its like to have to grow up, i just finished up my undergrad and am on my own this year...it sucks!

looks like you have all your goals set out for yourself--now you just have to focus on the everyday. it's hard, but I know you can do it...and remember, it gets easier to do the right thing each time you do it!

good luck on your weekly goals...i know i've got mine too!
 
HI Bomo! It has been awhile! I am glad your family visit went so well and I am sorry about how rough it has been not being with them.
About food I agree with Felici! You need to make sure to eat enough. Crash diets don't work! not long term and breakfest is important! I can't agree more! You want to do this right!! or else it might not stick and your health will suffer.
I have missed y'all! been so busy:( bad and good:)
 
felici: i know that i need a more balanced diet. I just havent made time for healthy foods. Bad me. I'm getting more in though. Breakfast wasnt so good. i didnt have lunch, and dinner i have no idea what i'm eating yet. But even if its bad...i plan on making myself a small salad and a piece of fruit with it. Just so i can say i had SOMETHING healthy today.

wishes: I'm an honest person. I am very appreciative of what i have, and i know my family has done A LOT for me. I owe them money...and they will get it.

fsaiidni: I finally decided that i need to stick to something. It would prove my responsibility. I'm not even completely on my own yet...but i know i'm not ready to grow up. I just HAVE to do it anyways.

mishi: i plan on eating at least one serving of a veggie, and a fruit every day. Even if it IS with something bad to eat. Until i can figure it all out.

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So breakfast today: a grilled cheese sandwich on wheat bread, with a few chip crumbs and a glass of juice.

Snack/lunch: 4 rolls from work...throughout the day.

Dinner: i havent had it yet. But i think the fam is getting pizza. I could have a cheeseburger sub, or a bbq chicken pizza. No matter what i get... i'm going to make myself a small salad. And have a piece of fruit with it.

I had work today. only 5.5 hours. Not bad. I usually work 9. So it was a SLOW...boring day.

Plans for tonight:
1. exercise. (ab chair) ddr doesnt come until tomorrow
2. reading. i want to read more of The Tempest.
3. Cake Decorating. (For homework)


My first pay check comes on Thursday. YAY!!!

I'm thinking about looking for a new car within the next few months. I would need a 0% down payment. My car is heading downhill. So once i save up some money, i will look into that.

i'll post again later.
 
Your food for today looks heaps better than what you had planned in your last post. Good for you!! :D A mix of wholegrain and protein for breakfast is a great start and adding a salad is another terrific idea. :)

Yay for that abchair! :D Getting that was a great step for someone who's so often stuck inside. What a great decision it was. Have lots of fun on it!!
 
I just finished eating supper. I had 3 slices of pizza. I wanted a 4th but stopped myself. I decided against the salad for now. But after my exercise i want a piece of fruit.

To do right now:

ab chair-until i get tired
a piece of fruit
shower
cake decorating homework
reading

I am going to get a notebook to keep track of weekly goals and finances.
 
Hi!! Your food did look better than what you had planned:) Really sounds like you are pushing well to get your stuff together:) I have heard Quickbooks budgeting software is a great way to get finances together. I am going to get the deluxe version this weekend so I will see for myself but I have heard nothing but good:)
Hope your having a great day today:)
 
Food Today:

Breakfast- wheat bagel with cheese and bacon. A bottle of water (i cant figure out how many calories this is. i found the amount for a bacon, egg, and cheese on a plain bagel....but its just that amount...minus the egg part. so 540 calories- minus egg calories. Ummm... can a estimate 448 calories for this meal.Because a large fried egg is 92 calories)

Lunch- honey bacon club quizno's sub on wheat bread. 641 calories

Dinner- a few bites of pasta with butter. And a few bites of chicken. But it wasnt any good without sauce. So i stopped.

So before the... 4 bites of pasta.. i had 1089 calories. WOW!! i thought i ate bad.

I did 75 sit ups before work. I wanted to do 100. But i didnt get a chance to do more. I did a set of 25 during a commercial. Then i did 50 straight before i got ready. It made me feel really good about my body before i went to work.

I'm exhausted. So I'm going to go to bed in a few minutes. (Its already 11:30pm) I have school in the morning. Then work from 5-9. Busy day. I will do 75 sit ups in the am before i go to school. Then between school and work... i will do 50 more. Then after work... 100 sit ups. I want to start working on my arms again. (using the weight bench) But i dont have time yet. So sit ups are what i want to work on. When i just do a few minutes of exercise before i go somewhere...i feel so good about myself. Which makes me in a better mood. SO i guess i've been doing a pretty good on calories. I just havent been counting them to praise myself.

I'm so worried about money right now. I'm in a point in life where i need money for so many things. I plan on moving out within the next 2 years. I need a new car within the next 6 months..(definately before 1 year from now) And blah blah blah. Oh well. I get my first pay check tomorrow. worry bout it later.

GOODNIGHT
 
hehe once the money comes in regular you will be fine. I hate 'just getting by' with money also. Ill never forget having to kill one of the pet chooks and having it roasted with rice one night because we were too broke years ago.
 
You're making heaps of progress!

Way to go on fitting those situps in when things are so hectic.

It makes sense that they keep you feeling good.

Your finances are so much better than they were a few weeks ago. I'm sure things will work out. Maybe in a while you will get a better paid position where you're working too. :)
 
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