Bella's diary

[Bella1986]

July 25th 2021

walnut, oat, egg, lentil, carrot, dates, banana, peach, celery, milk

I don't drink water these days and I don't like this. It is so strange how our taste changes, I used to drink water all day long and now I have to trick myself into drinking 2 glasses of water each day.

I am thinking what it would be like to only eat vegetables, fruits and nuts. In that case I would need to eat edamame, hempseeds, almonds and walnuts to get enough protein. An imaginary day would be like oats mixed with hempseeds and walnuts for breakfast along side some fruits and a big cup of coffee, sautéed vegetables and cooked lentils for lunch, almonds as snack, a lot of fruits for dinner. This requires lots of washed fruits and vegetables in the fridge.

 

[Bella1986]

July 26th 2021

Happy with my eating mood today. I am gradually quitting watching TV for two reasons, first it is more likely to keep eating while watching TV, second I think with all the smartphone applications and TV there is too much visual input to the brain which leads to less mindfulness and more difficulty to fall asleep on time.

Some decisions for upcoming days:
waking up at 6
continuing meal prepping
eating more variety of fruits and vegetables
starting meditation again

Good Stuff: peach, banana, zucchini, lime, broccoli, potato, onion

Sugar: ZERO!

July 27th 2021 561

Good Stuff: oats, avocado, walnuts, lentils, grapes, lime, dark chocolate, carrot

sugar: ZERO!

General mood these days: down

August 1st 2021

Good Stuff: eggs, walnuts, grapes, beans, carrot, watermelon, herbs

I don't feel happy these days.

 

[Cate]

I don't feel happy these days.

I hope you get your happy back, Bella
Are fresh cherries available where you are? I am so missing cherries. They really make me feel good. Are you walking much? Well done on having 2 days without added sugar!

 

[Bella1986]

I hope you get your happy back, Bella
Are fresh cherries available where you are? I am so missing cherries. They really make me feel good. Are you walking much? Well done on having 2 days without added sugar!

Thank you so much, Cate How are you doing these days?
Yes! Cherries are in the store and for a reasonably good price. The other day I saw 1.80$/lb in a store. I'll go buy some!
Unfortunately I don't go for a walk really. dunno what I'm waiting for. maybe I should just get up and walk instead of thinking.

 

[Cate]

I'm doing well thanks, although I have to push myself out the door most days. Our winter has been colder & wetter than normal. Luckily my little dog nags me. He makes me happy
Cherries really do make me feel good. Walking is so much better than thinking Make sure you really look around & take the time to admire anything in nature. I even go out in the rain now & I'm a sook.

 

[Bella1986]

Back to junk food and energy drinks. my weight is increasing.

 

[Cate]

Put a stop to it, hon. Your body deserves healthy nutrition

 

[Bella1986]

I remember two years ago I was so happy and grateful for eating healthy and being fit. what happened. how did I gain 12 kg back. how.
can't go without food. used to go without food 18 hrs/day. now I'm out of breath, hungry and tired all the time. I wish I could be like two years ago.

 

[Cate]

Me too, Bella, but I'm back on track again & have 16.5kg to lose altogether. You can do this, I really can't think of anyone I know that has been overweight, lost it & not regained some at least once. We learn as we go. This time, when I do get back to my happy weight, I am going to be vigilant, weigh myself at least twice a week & cut back instantly if it creeps up again. It took about 4-5 days to stop being so hungry, but after 2 weeks I rarely am now.

 

[Floater]

used to go without food 18 hrs/day. now I'm out of breath, hungry and tired all the time. I wish I could be like two years ago.

Perhaps intermittent fasting worked out for a while until your body's limits were reached, it lead to binging, and it would be healthier to try and return to a 3 meals two snacks a day rhythm? Not trying to tell you what to do, but only eating in a 6 hr window throughout a day is kind of extreme. Take care!

 

[Bella1986]

Me too, Bella, but I'm back on track again & have 16.5kg to lose altogether. You can do this, I really can't think of anyone I know that has been overweight, lost it & not regained some at least once. We learn as we go. This time, when I do get back to my happy weight, I am going to be vigilant, weigh myself at least twice a week & cut back instantly if it creeps up again. It took about 4-5 days to stop being so hungry, but after 2 weeks I rarely am now.

Thank you for your support, Cate. I agree, we learn as we go. I do believe I can do it again and quit sugar again. Last year when the lockdown started I went through some hardship and didn't care that I was eating sweets daily. It's kinda sad how we use sugar to escape bad feelings for a few minutes. I start quitting sugar again!

 

[Bella1986]

December 8th, 2021. I am sitting in a dark study room. university welcomes you with the image of bakery as you walk in to the libraries. I looked at the cookies so many times but stopped myself from ordering and hid myself in this dark study room.

 

[Cate]

A bakery near the libraries. That's cruel (& weird). Well done on resisting!

 

[Bella1986]

The first time I posted in my diary here was about four years ago. Unfortunately, I am back to the same unhealthy weight and stressful lifestyle. There are several reasons for this failure, mainly stress, narcissist partner, being away from family and friends, ...

Today I decided to take action and get my health back one more time. I observed some positive developments during the day:

1) cooked a fast nutritious meal (mushroom, onion, sardine, garlic, spinach, quinoa, egg, turmeric, cumin, olive oil, yogurt, chickpeas, sauerkraut)
2) installed an app to track water intake
3) avoided sugar for 10 hours

Things I think I should work on now are:

1) starting 5:2 plan and recording the results for at least one month
2) decreasing my stress level by morning and evening meditation and time management (writing a to-do list first thing in the morning)
3) getting enough sleep
4) going to the gym twice a week
5) drink water during the day and record it until I get to the daily goal

obstacles:

1) being tempted to eat junk food under stress to feel better even for five minutes
2) not having enough time to prepare food at home every day
3) not having enough time to sleep every night

I think lots of these would have been resolved if I could stay away from stress in my life.

 

[Cate]

Hey, Bella. Welcome back. Stress plays a huge part in our health. Somehow learning to manage that would help in most aspects of your life. I am going to try to incorporate meditation back into my day too. It's good to see that you are prioritising your health again. All the best with it

 

[Bella1986]

Hey, Bella. Welcome back. Stress plays a huge part in our health. Somehow learning to manage that would help in most aspects of your life. I am going to try to incorporate meditation back into my day too. It's good to see that you are prioritising your health again. All the best with it

You are right, Cate. Stress destroys health.
I hope everything is going well with you.