Addie's New Beginning

Risty said:
I think what you said hits the nail on the head. When I'm in a down mood, laziness kinda goes hand in hand with it. So you're right, when in that mood the best thing to do is workout because you always feel better afterwards! Something I need to remind myself of next time I'm in that situation :)
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You guys are right on the money with this one. It's helps to hear others say it. Nothing like going to the gym to shake off the blues.
 
I was actually like that today! SOO tired from working late last night and then working early this morning. Plus knowing I had to go back to work and work late again. I was just like... I DON'T want to exercise, I just wanna sleep! But I just took one step at a time... put on my workout clothes... put the dvd in... got my shoes on.... ok now I have to do it. I really had to thing about this convo too! I felt awesome after! I'm glad I did it and more importantly that it's done and overwith for the day, lol.
 
:seeya: Hi, I love reading your diary. So much of what you say is exactly what I'm going through. I've had PCOS for most of my child-bearing life for starters.... For another thing, I totally get what you were saying about leaving work and not going back. I thought I was the only one those type of anxiety attacks happened to, where you just want to up and leave it all behind. If I may say so, I think you're doing exactly the right thing by focusing on the gym and your health right now. You've got to get yourself healthy and happy before you can focus on anyone else properly.

I also am on the PCOS rollercoaster. Doctors have told me it's all weight-related and that when you get to a healthy weight range, the hormones sort themselves out. I'm crossing my fingers that it happens for me. I guess we just keep trucking until we see results! Best of luck and keep up the awesome working out. :)
 
Shinsplint said:
:seeya: Hi, I love reading your diary. So much of what you say is exactly what I'm going through. I've had PCOS for most of my child-bearing life for starters.... For another thing, I totally get what you were saying about leaving work and not going back. I thought I was the only one those type of anxiety attacks happened to, where you just want to up and leave it all behind. If I may say so, I think you're doing exactly the right thing by focusing on the gym and your health right now. You've got to get yourself healthy and happy before you can focus on anyone else properly.

I also am on the PCOS rollercoaster. Doctors have told me it's all weight-related and that when you get to a healthy weight range, the hormones sort themselves out. I'm crossing my fingers that it happens for me. I guess we just keep trucking until we see results! Best of luck and keep up the awesome working out. :)
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Thanks, Shinsplint. It really helps out to know that there are other people out there going through the same kind of thing. A lot of times I try to convince myself that having PCOS doesn't really affect me ... that's me trying to be strong. But really, there are a lot of ways in which it has screwed with my life. I think the part that bothers me most about it is that with my hormones being SO screwy, my moods (and therefore life) are completely unpredictable. And then I look at it and say, "Oh, my hormones must be doing something crazy again" ... and it's like this thing that I can't control.

I'm sort of a control freak about my body, so having something like PCOS drives me nuts. The anxiety attacks are fairly new ... at least their frequency & intensity is. Living through that week was very stressful, all I wanted to do was escape, and part of that feeling is still lingering.

I guess part of the reason that I've taken a liking to researching health and fitness so much is because it's something that I can actually control. It's not EASY by any means ... but it is pretty simple. Eat less, move more, limit stress ...visible results. I can depend on that ratio 99.999% of the time, which is a lot more than I can depend on most things in my life. It's almost soothing to be losing weight in some ways, haha!



Anyway--as a quick update, I weighed in this morning at 304.6lbs after being up ALL week. I was a little frustrated, so I changed up my diet (mostly increasing leafy greens) a little bit and wound up dropping about 3.5lbs in just a few days. I guess the weight was waiting to fall off, it just needed the little extra push. If I can continue at this rate, reaching my Valentine's Day goal should be perfectly attainable. :)
 
Hi!

Congratulations on the weight loss!

Oh anxiety attacks can be the worst:( Are you on medication for them?

WillLose60
 
WillLose60 said:
Hi!

Congratulations on the weight loss!

Oh anxiety attacks can be the worst:( Are you on medication for them?

WillLose60
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Thanks, WillLose60! I take Xanax as needed for my anxiety. I was taking Zoloft (as I was trying to conceive and it is the only "safe" one to use while pregnant) but I had an allergic reaction to it, so I switched to Xanax which I don't have to take everyday. Even when the attacks get bad, I try not to take it too often, as sometimes I cannot be sure if I am or am not pregnant during a particular cycle, and as I know it can be habit forming. It helps take the edge off for sure, but it doesn't get rid of the feeling completely.
 
303.8 this morning!!! I'm officially over 30lbs into my journey ... I am so excited this morning! I could almost cry ... seriously! Really, all I have to do is continue doing what I've done about 4 more times and I'll be right on the verge of my LIFETIME goal weight. Oh jeez there goes the tears ...

This is a very big milestone for me... moreso than 20lbs. was. In my mind, I guess I thought, a lot of people can lose 20lbs. and then stop, but the fact that I went from 20lbs. lost ... and kept going to 30lbs. lost ... it's not the number I'm impressed with so much as the consistency and the forward momentum. Sure, I've had minor slip-ups, but none of which that lasted longer than a few days. In the last 11 and a half weeks, (using weekly weigh-ins) I have not gained a single pound. My weight would fluctuate in-between, but would always be down by the end of the week.

I have not been this proud of myself in a long time. It feels wonderful.
 
Addiecakes said:
303.8 this morning!!! I'm officially over 30lbs into my journey ... it's not the number I'm impressed with so much as the consistency and the forward momentum. ...
I have not been this proud of myself in a long time. It feels wonderful.
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CONGRATULATIONS!!! Thirty pounds is quite a milestone. I think the further you progress on this journey, the more momentum you build and the more pride you take in your efforts. The positive results just build and foster more positive energy and excitement. Glad you are enjoying the ride!! Most people make weight loss sound so miserable but there are some really great and enjoyable moments along this journey. :)
 
Good job on the weight loss! Those leafy greens are awesome! (Speaking of which I should add more to my own diet ;) hehe).
 
Addiecakes said:
303.8 this morning!!! I'm officially over 30lbs into my journey ... I am so excited this morning! I could almost cry ... seriously! Really, all I have to do is continue doing what I've done about 4 more times and I'll be right on the verge of my LIFETIME goal weight. Oh jeez there goes the tears ...

This is a very big milestone for me... moreso than 20lbs. was. In my mind, I guess I thought, a lot of people can lose 20lbs. and then stop, but the fact that I went from 20lbs. lost ... and kept going to 30lbs. lost ... it's not the number I'm impressed with so much as the consistency and the forward momentum. Sure, I've had minor slip-ups, but none of which that lasted longer than a few days. In the last 11 and a half weeks, (using weekly weigh-ins) I have not gained a single pound. My weight would fluctuate in-between, but would always be down by the end of the week.

I have not been this proud of myself in a long time. It feels wonderful.
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30 FREAKING POUNDS. Talk about motivation :D The next time you go to a gym, pick up a 30 pound weight. It makes you realize just how far you have become! :hurray:

I have to say, youre doing this the right way, with the correct attitude. You know that although it may take some time, this will be the last time you ever face this situation again. Doing wondeful Ashley :D
 
YOU ROCK!!

I thought the exact same thing. I'd fluctuated up and down 20 lbs before, but once I hit 30, I knew I was onto something for life. Congrats!
 
Hey Addiecakes!

You are SO CLOSE to 300 lbs! That is amazing!! :)

I notices you saying earlier "I've been going up all week, so i changed my diet, etc, etc.." Anyways, I was just thinking about this, and its good that you were able to change some things. Perhaps even catch yourself straying off your targets. But what I wanted to say was that from all the books, and diets, and doctors i've spoken to, I think its not the best thing sometimes to weigh yourself in every day. please don't take this the wrong way. I'm just saying that our bodies (especially us being +300) fluctuate so much day to day, and from water retention, to many other factors (unknown to me at least), all-in-all i've heard that a weekly weigh in is the best way to go about it..

Although, I can attest myself that I usually let myself slip on saturdays (after my saturday morning weigh-ins) thinking that I have a whole week to make up for it.. I have to fix that habit, but I hope you see my point.

Nevertheless, V-Day is around the corner, and I know 300 is within your grasp! So keep at it, and good luck! :)
 
Hi everyone!


I've been getting some messages wondering if I'm still around since it's been a little while since I've updated and I haven't been my chatty self. I just wanted you all to know that I'm doing just fine. I may need to put my weight-loss journey on hiatus for a while, but I will fill you all in about that as I find out more myself.

Thanks for understanding, and for all the lovely comments you've left here. You have no idea how much I appreciate it! <3
 
So, after not getting my period for 43 days and after not losing a single pound in a week where I really worked hard and ate quite well, I was suspicious, and it turns out those suspicions have been confirmed.

It looks like losing weight was the best thing for my fertility issues, because just 3 short months after starting, I find myself sitting here, 6 weeks pregnant.

I have not been to the doctor yet (my first appt. is Wednesday), and so I have been taking it easy workout-wise because I'm not sure what I should and should not be doing, plus the symptoms have been making it difficult to feel good enough to do anything. But, hopefully, I'll still be able to maintain most of my regular fitness levels throughout most of the pregnancy.

My first pregnancy was very healthy, and I suspect that I had PCOS (although undiagnosed) at that time as well. So I am cautiously optimistic that things will go smoothly this time around as well, even having PCOS and being obese.

My goal is to maintain between 305-310lbs throughout the pregnancy (I'm sitting at 307 today). I calculate that I was around 310-311 at the time of conception, and I only gained 2lbs over my pre-pregnancy weight with my daughter. I also got pregnant at 320lbs. last time, so I know I'm already in a better place! I will obviously adjust those goals if they do not coincide with my doctor's recommendations.

My due date (by my calculations) is my original wedding date of 10/10/10 ... (my first was due on 7/7/07, how funny!) we are likely pushing the wedding to Spring or Summer of 2011 now.

That's about it! I'll still be around, but I'm unsure of just how many challenges I'll be able to participate in right now ... but there's no reason to change my healthy lifestyle because I got pregnant (except I obviously will not intentionally eat a caloric deficit).

Hope all is well with the rest of you :D
 
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