2015 - A Year of Health and Happiness

Hi BlueBean, I really love my tennis. Also, we had a break over Christmas, so I didn't want to leave it too long before playing again.

Today work went a lot better, thank God. Me and some of my team members went out for lunch, which was lovely. It's nice to get on.

Weigh-in today was 12 stone 1, not bad. I am sick of being this weight though, I need to make a big push for the next few weeks to try to get under 12. I think this is sort of a default weight for me now. I've managed to swing the weight pendulum down, but now I need to do a bit extra food and exercise-wise to get to the next stage. I am thrilled with my progress though.

Food today was ok, except I've had around 10 biscuits, which is obviously not good. I gave the gym a skip as well, I just really wanted to go home after work. Now I'm here, I'm a little bit irritable.

My cold is nearly gone though, thank God. My mum has it though, and she's a bag of misery around the place, she's driving me mad.

Moving out soon, can't wait to have my own space! Fingers crossed an amazing apartment comes on the market tomorrow, cos I need to get out of here.

Plan tomorrow is be healthy in my food choices and go for a gym workout.
Sunday - spinning and tennis practice

Agh, the weekend goes so fast!
 
Hello! I weighed in today at 11 stone 13 pounds! I can't remember the last time I was this weight. A new milestone reached!

Other than that, I'm still feeling a bit blah. I'm over my sickness really, but my hair is limp, I don't have a lot of energy, and I'm not sure what to do with myself for the day. I'm just feeling irritated.

My muscles are a bit achy, so might skip the gym and just go into town and have a walk around. I got paid this week, so in theory I could go shopping, but there's not much I need. I'll see. There's some good homemade hair recipes in this detox book I use sometimes, I might buy some of those ingredients. Or buy some other healthy ingredients for snacks and things - some greek yoghurt, seeds, berries, that type of thing. Hmm.

Had a really long sleep and lie-in today, so I will be getting up for spin tomorrow.

That's it for now, talk again tomorrow.
 
Hi Caroline, I would start saving for some slim clothes as you will need them & stock your pantry with healthy foods. You are doing this sweets. I'm on your cheer squad. Go team WLF!! Cheers, Cate.
 
Thanks Cate. Had a bit of a setback yesterday, but that's all part of it I guess.

I think there's always an element of fear when losing weight, and I think that's why yesterday I decided to eat and eat and eat and eat. Now I am back up to 12 stone 2 pounds. Which isn't even that bad, it's just the fact that my reaction to getting to a new low was to stuff my face. It's like I feel I don't deserve to be slim.

So the weekend has not panned out like I wanted it to, and I also haven't done half the exercise I was planning. I am going to play tennis with my dad at 3 though, so that's something. He'll be cooking a healthy dinner for us as well, so that's good.

I have a nutrition meeting at my gym tomorrow - just a one-to-one between me and one of the trainers, Carl. I hate these things, but hopefully he'll have some good tips for me.
 
I think we have all done that Caroline. Working on our mindset is as important as on our bodies, in my view. You do deserve to be slim & healthy. We all do. It wouldn't hurt to mention it to Carl. He may just have some good tips for you.
 
Thanks Cate, have to stop the self-sabotage!

Hey everyone.

Weighed in this morning at 12 stone 3. Eek.

Had a great talk with my trainer today about food. He told me that I am not taking in enough protein, and that's why my blood sugar dips so dramatically in the afternoon and why I crave biscuits, chocolate, SUGAR! a lot. It's the body crying out for nutrients.

So, his advice is to have a boiled egg every morning. I will be following the lead of this guy:

View attachment 22570

Also, he said to divide my lunch in half, so have some at 1 and then the rest at 3:30, so that I am not getting that afternoon slump.

I'm going to try it!

Went to spinning after work, really tough class, felt good after it.
 
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Weight: 12 stone 3 (Depressing at this stage)

I have been absolutely starving all day. It snowed here today, so maybe it's the cold weather?

I had my breakfast of porridge, blueberries and sunflower seeds with a boiled egg (carbs, sugars, fats, proteins). No problemo.

Had a mid-morning snack of greek yoghurt, blueberries and almonds.

By 1 o'clock I thought I was going to pass out from the hunger. I went across the road to the local cafe and got a scrumptious small portion of minestrone soup and a ham and cheese toastie. And a coffee. Still not full.

I caved by mid-afternoon and had 3 biscuits.

I got home and just had a turkey curry dinner. Still hungry. Debating what to have now.

I think I have been looking very stressed lately. I don't like it.

I didn't do any exercise today because the roads are bad and I'm enjoying chilling out by the fire with my parents. They're the best.
 
Weighed in today at 12 stone 3 again. So frustrating.

I made a super healthy dinner of veggie stir-fry with some chicken and pasta, but I had a really bad lunch. Sigh.

Finding the whole thing difficult now. My motivation has gone down bigtime.

Planning on hitting the hay early and going to pilates in the morning. I really need a win.
 
Have one single day where you don't eat any starchy carbs. No pasta, bread, rice, potatoes, biscuits etc. Just one day. See what happens. You can do this Caroline. You'll get a win soon! Sending you a big hug :grouphug: xoxo
 
Hi Cate, thank you for the support. I know what you're saying with cutting out the carbs, but it's nearly impossible for me to concentrate in work if I'm hungry, so I'll probably try it on a weekend day.

Weighed in today at 12 stone 2. Relieved.

Work dragged so much today. My manager gave me loads of new topics to work on but it's all so vague. I would really like to see how someone else coming in doing my job would approach it.

But enough about that. Life is a bit bland and boring at the moment. I'm looking for an apartment in the town but it's hard to find somewhere good. I hate January.
 
Even if you aren't doing great or you are struggling with motivation you should stick around and keep posting. That has always been the quickest path to getting back on track or finding my motivation. Best of luck with the apartment hunt.
 
Hi Quercus, thanks. I didn't get a chance to post yesterday, but I will keep it going.

Weighed in yesterday at 12 stone 2, today at 12 stone 1. Result.

I finally found some motivation after work yesterday and went to the gym. I was actually feeling really sick because somebody brought in cake and it didn't agree with me, and after doing some weights and a bit of running, my stomach was back to normal, so I was delighted. It's at times like that that you realise how great exercise is for you. It puts you back into balance.

I went out for a few drinks last night, feeling a bit groggy today, but it could be worse.

I am planning on doing a 'perfect week' this week, starting tomorrow. Basically, that means gym or class every day, no smoking/alcohol, and following my healthy eating plan. It's not going to be easy, but I need to set myself a challenge and get under this 12 stone and stay there.
 
Hey Quercus, perfect week might be harder than I thought! See my thoughts on this below.

Today's weight: 12 stone 3

Not surprising, considering I got a footlong meatball marinara from Subway yesterday. (In my defense, I ordered the 6 inch, but she gave me a footlong, so I just thought it was divine intervention at play and said nothing.)

Anyhoo, I was thinking. I was watching Katy Perry's documentary yesterday, which is surprisingly really good, and I wouldn't consider myself a Katy Perry fan. But anyway, she has an absolutely amazing figure, really toned and slim but not skinny. And she's the same height as me. I looked up her weight, and she said she's around 130 pounds. I am more or less 170 pounds, 40 pounds heavier than that. Which might spiral me into some kind of depression if I thought about it too much. But then I was thinking, if I just lost 1 pound a week for the next 40 weeks, I would be there. 1 pound a week is not too much. I checked in the calendar, and that would bring me to mid-October. That's really not so far away. And, to be honest, I'm starting from a good place. I still feel too heavy, but I'm back into size 16 clothes, my weight is just a bit over the highest it should be, so really, there's no issue there. I have a good exercise regime in place that I just need to pick up again. I should be able to do this.

Tomorrow is week 1 of 40. I'm only going to weigh myself every Monday now. I am going to go with life. I am going to enjoy myself while I lose the weight. So, I am going to all social events, no more hiding away. But obviously, I need some rules, such as no drinking during the week, no biscuits from the press, no buying cakes and coffees and chocolate. But, for instance, if my dad makes apple crumble for dessert on Sunday, and I've stayed away from crap all week, I will allow myself to have it.

Anyway, this is where I'm at right now.
 
Hi there.

Weight today: 12 stone 2

That's it for the weigh-ins for the next week.

Had a great day foodwise.

Breakfast: scrambled egg and cayenne pepper with slice of white toast and butter
Snack: slice of brown bread with peanut butter; greek yoghurt with almonds and blueberries
Lunch: baked potato with tuna and cheese and small salad
Snack: apple
Dinner: bacon and ketchup, turnip, cabbage and potatoes
Drinks: coffee x2, tea x2, peppermint tea

Exercise: weights class

Had a good day today. Don't want to go to work tomorrow though.
 
Your plan sound very reasonable and more attainable than "perfect". You'll have to explain what "biscuits from the press" means. With your "stones" talk I know you mean cookies when you say biscuits, but in the US "the press" means journalists. Are newspaper reporters and TV anchors giving you cookies? Also ketchup is nasty. How dare you sully bacon with it. I don't eat bacon anymore, but still. Is that a normal food for you or in your country?

View attachment 22580

Also, what do you call those^?
 
Haha, very funny post Quercus. A press is another word for a cupboard. It's amazing how powerful a little cupboard can be.

I really like ketchup with bacon, I find it kind of dry on its own. I don't think I mean the bacon you're thinking of, we call those rashers. It's a bacon loin we would have for dinner sometimes:

View attachment 22582

We wouldn't have bacon that much, it was only okay yesterday to be honest.

I would call the things in the picture brown scones. They look really yummy. Unreal with cream and jam. :drooling: ETA: On closer inspection, they're not brown scones, just normal scones. Still good.

Today was really bad foodwise, great on the exercise front though. I played tennis and went for a swim. My legs were cramping a bit in the pool though, I think I'm a bit dehydrated. Sometimes I worry that I've developed diabetes because I am thirsty all the time. I should probably get that checked out. I don't want to lose a limb.

Food started with cereal, then someone brought in an AMAZING chocolate cake, then I wanted more chocolate after work and didn't ignore the cravings, and now I wonder did I really need to eat all of that. Good day yesterday, bad day today. How do I get out of this sugar trap? Gah!
 
Weight: 12 stone 2

Yes, I said I would stop weighing every day. But when I weigh everyday, it kind of puts me off overeating a bit more because I know the scales will punish me in the morning.

Anyway, yes, still stuck on 12/2. To get to 11/13 again and stay there would be fantastic. Then to see 11/10, 11/5, 11/nothin'. That's the plan.

I was a fitness queen today, I had a session in the gym with Carl and then I went to pilates class afterwards.

The good parts: My flexibility and strength in my arms has improved so much. I really noticed in pilates today that my muscles are not as tight, and I haven't done it since before Christmas. I was thrilled with that. When I do the plank, I notice how strong my arms are. It's my mid-section that is letting me down.

The bad parts: I felt like a fat blob working out with Carl. I felt like I was back to 14 stone again. He had me doing freeweights, and all I could see was my huge stomach sticking out. We have a final weigh-in meeting at some stage next week, and he said, 'Caroline will have lost 5 stone'. Which made me feel crappy that he thinks I have 5 stone to lose. Which I don't, but it just annoyed me. He kept going on about 'this will get you to look like a bikini model'. Which would be ideal, of course, but it's too much pressure. He asked me about my diet, and I felt ashamed and embarrassed that I'm still eating loads of crap. And smoking.

Anyway, rant over. Food today was good, then I came home and ate biscuits and ice cream (after a healthy dinner). I don't have that stuffed feeling, but I know if I had just resisted, I would have had a good result on the scales tomorrow.

I also have a big party coming up the week after next, and I want to look good at it. I want to feel good too, and maybe buy a new outfit. I want to meet someone, and it's impossible when I feel this way about me and my body.
 
I believe what you call bacon we call pork loin. So they had scones when I lived in Seattle and they generally had some degree of sweetness. A southern biscuit isn't sweet and is eaten with butter and gravy or as the bun of a breakfast sandwich. I don't eat wheat, dairy, or meat anymore as a rule so it's strictly academic at this stage.

Now down to business. Stop smoking. Your efforts are wasted as long as you are doing that to yourself. There is no amount of smoking that isn't terrible for you. Stop. Even if it makes you eat cake and candy and gain a boulder or whatever. Just stop. It is as simple as that. Simple not easy. I smoked and I quit. It may suck, but let it suck. Just stop. Please! Whatever your weight and however much you exercise you can't be healthy and smoke. I don't know or care what you smoke, but find a way to get the substance in another form.

Sorry to be so preachy, but all of the people that I have lost in my life died from smoking with other loved ones puffing their way to an early grave as we speak. You've made great progress and you can stop smoking without losing any ground in the weighloss realm. It won't be easy, but you have my unwavering support.

As for Carl: Having someone to push you is a good thing, but if Carl isn't listening or setting realistic goals and demands then maybe find someone else. Explain your weigh goal and see if he listens. If you haven't spoken up then that's on you. If he isn't listening to reason than Carl needs to calm down.

Sorry for being so severe. I'm happy for your weight loss and strength gains and just want to see you have the most success in the long run.
 
^^ What he said ^^
Hey Caroline, just finished reading you posts. And something I wanted to say was "DON'T BEAT YOURSELF UP". It take time. Be patient.
I know its hard to get over cravings, but it will happen. Figure out a way to substitute it. Put some healthy snacks or fruits in your desk when a craving hits. And when a coworker brings in treats you have to have that self control to stay away from it. Maybe get a coworker to be your "Enforcer". Let them know that your are really trying to lose the weight and get healthy and have them stop you when you head for the chocolate cake another coworker brought in.

Also, something that works for me. Sometimes when I get that late afternoon or late evening hunger, I make myself a nice cup or 2 of Green Tea. It usually does the trick.

Ok enough of me....

Good luck girl. I wish you all the best. I'll be coming by and checking on you.
 
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