199 And Counting Down... Cassy's New Story

so... it's been what? 2 weeks since I last posted? anything, anywhere...
2 weeks since the last time i actually worked out... i've been eating within my calories no problem, but i just havent been up to excersizing... probably just lazy buti just havent been into it... i've been down and out feeling some sort of depression... still working my way out, some days are better then others... I don't really know whats causing it i just have an intense feeling that something is missing in my life... i'm just not sure what it is... maybe some excitement... im not sure...
Any way i didn't die or anything and i'm sure i'll be around a little more often. hopefully i'll have something a little more interesting to share :)
 
Aww, sorry you've been feeling a little blue and lazy lately. I hope you climb out of the slump quickly! There's so much more work left to do. :D haha
 
MotherOf2 said:
so... it's been what? 2 weeks since I last posted? anything, anywhere...

2 weeks since the last time i actually worked out... i've been eating within my calories no problem, but i just havent been up to excersizing... probably just lazy buti just havent been into it... i've been down and out feeling some sort of depression... still working my way out, some days are better then others... I don't really know whats causing it i just have an intense feeling that something is missing in my life... i'm just not sure what it is... maybe some excitement... im not sure...
Any way i didn't die or anything and i'm sure i'll be around a little more often. hopefully i'll have something a little more interesting to share :)
Click to expand...
awwww hun.:(...I know what you mean..REALLY!!!!! I do....:angelsad2:

I used to find that I would feel like that too when I didn't have a "baby" goal to work towards, or a reason to work out for...(I mean ourselves should be good enough..but unfortunately sometimes that's just not enough to get me moving), or let alone something that I am trying to achieve or be part of....

...like the past year for example...right before I joined the forum,...I was really depressed and a drunk cause of it...and way bigger too and it was leaping into all areas of my life and I felt like I couldn't control it...and then THANK GOD....something changed in my mind and with hard work, I am happy now! Real happy! And I feel full in life....so what did I do to try fixing it..hmmmm ....let's see:

-I started Believing in myself
-I started a SIDE BUSINESS
-I took Property Management Courses-so I can change my job
-I started going to the book store and picking up at least 2 books a week-to cultivate the brain (inspirational ones that make me wanna move..)...lol
-I started changing my surrounding-people mainly-to more positive ones
-I started listening to some good audio tapes
-I stopped relying on my bf to bring me happiness
-I found the forum
-I made new friends
-I joined Spinning Classes
-I Run now
-I took Raw Eating Classes
-I started registering for running races
-I started swimming
-I started focusing on daily "FINISHED things"
-I started going to Church again-really started talking to God a lot
-Asked God for direction and guidance
-MOST IMPORTANT: I changed my thinking to feeling that I have EVERYTHING in the WORLD that I want...and that I am the happiest woman on the PLANET!...slowly...slowly...it is all becoming TRUE!!!

...have you seen the "THE SECRET".....????? OMG GIRL!!! WATCH IT!!!!!:D!!!...google it...it's about the LAWS OF ATTRACTION!!! :drool5:

I hope you feel better and you have a great day with your babies!! :)

"Success is a journey,
not a destination-
half the fun is getting there."

Gita Bellin

"Cease trying
to work everything out
with your minds,
it will get you nowhere.

Live by intuition,
and inspiration
and let your whole life
be a Revelation."

Eileen Caddy-Footprints on the Path

"We are not here just to survive
and live long.....
We are here to live and know life
in its multi-dimensions
to know life in its richness,
in all its variety.

And when a man lives
multi-dimensionally,
explores all possibilities available,
never shrinks back from any challenge,
goes, rushes to it, welcomes it,
rise to the occasion
then life becomes a flame,
life Blooms!"

Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh
-The Sacred Yes

...quotes always give me something mental to chew on!! :grouphug:!!
 
believe it or not i actually have seen "the secret" and fully believe in the idea actually... thanks for the motivational reminders, always appreciated :)
I'm still not sure how to shake this though... i want to pursue whatever it might be that would make me feel more complete, but i'm not sure exactly what it is i'm missing... I just know theres something i'm missing... like theres got to be more to life then this... everytime i have certain thought i do try to reason with myself, try to convince myself to be happy with what i do have but it doesnt work all that well.. I'm pretty sure i've never argued with myself so much in my entire life, i dont think i've tried to reason with another person more then im trying to reason with myself... i find it hard to focus on anything or even complete any tasks that arnt almost robotic out of repitition... i'm just so stuck in my own head...
I dont even think its been just recently that theres been a problem.. it wasnt until recently i realized how unhappy i am... it wasnt until i tried to think of the last time i truely had fun or laughed that it hit me... then i tried to think of something i could do that i would find enjoyable around here and i couldnt think of anything. I used to laugh everyday several time a day sometimes practically all day.
It;s really sad to think about how much i really dont want this life how i wish I could start over... I get my head stuck in fanasies and wish i could live a different life, then i think about my current life and couldnt possibly imagine leaving my kids behind or hurting my husband but i cant help but dream about a life without the obligations I have....
I'm basically hoping this is just going to pass... I always hit these highs and lows... this could be one of the lowest and most long lasting yet but i'm hoping it will be over eventually... my plan is to just force myself back into my excersize routine and life routines and hopefully I can come back to reality... even a boring life is better then dwelling on your boring life...
 
aaawww honey, I honestly think alot of that comes form being a mommy so young ya know.It is one hella responsability.I usually go through relaly sever burn out once a year...it just always happens ya know even super moms crash and burn from time to time...I didnt really realize how bad of a time you were having:grouphug:

Ya know im around if ya ever need or want to talk just give me a holla...I mean that anytime:grouphug:

I also know how it feels to want and wish to start over or to be unhappy with your life.What i do is focus on my kids...they are what keeps me going cuz they need me to keep on going.

It sucks being burdend with so much responsibility so young.Ive been a mom since i was 16 and since 16 i have been putitng myself through school, working and yadda yadda yadda to support my once one dauyghter and hten now to support them both...Ive pretty much been a single mom all my life, thatis now going on to 15 yrs, eeekk...so trust me when i can say Ic an relate on some levels...

Please dont hesitate to message me if ya wanna chat!!!
 
cinderelly said:
aaawww honey, I honestly think alot of that comes form being a mommy so young ya know.It is one hella responsability.I usually go through relaly sever burn out once a year...it just always happens ya know even super moms crash and burn from time to time...I didnt really realize how bad of a time you were having:grouphug:

Ya know im around if ya ever need or want to talk just give me a holla...I mean that anytime:grouphug:

I also know how it feels to want and wish to start over or to be unhappy with your life.What i do is focus on my kids...they are what keeps me going cuz they need me to keep on going.

It sucks being burdend with so much responsibility so young.Ive been a mom since i was 16 and since 16 i have been putitng myself through school, working and yadda yadda yadda to support my once one dauyghter and hten now to support them both...Ive pretty much been a single mom all my life, thatis now going on to 15 yrs, eeekk...so trust me when i can say Ic an relate on some levels...

Please dont hesitate to message me if ya wanna chat!!!
Click to expand...

It probably does have a lot to do with it... you really dont know what your giving up untill you can't go back... i wouldnt change the decisions i made knowing that id be missing out on 2 wonderful kids, but I will do everything I can to ensure my kids don't take the same path.
I really do just need to focus on other things than how much i wish my life was like this or that and start doing the best i can with what i have again... I am greatful that my kids give me a reason to get out of bed in the morning... if i didnt have them i would probably sleep my life away like i often feel like doing...
I am getting better though... the last week has been a bit better , the last few days have been pretty normal... I havent gotten back into excersing yet except a few days i did like half an hour.
On the upside i'm still losing weight sticking to calorie counting and probably a little muscle too :ack2: but i'm doing okay... I figure its probably good to take some time off after 5 months of hard work... besides I have the rest of my life... whats a few weeks out of decades... I'm not reverting back to my old ways just easing off a little ith full intention to get back into gear for another several months probably starting next week... ha ha trying to look at the bright side of things...
I'm trying to convince mysel I'm going to work really hard right now with my kids and self improvement and by the time my kids are self sufficient I'll still be fairly young and looking great so I'll have plenty of time for fun then... lol thats my long term plan, wish me luck lol
 
Hey Peeps! LOL been doing MUCH better! I'm not excersixing as much as I was but I'm also A LOT more active in other things, just being outside and whatnot... As you can see on my ticker I'm still making progress... my pitiful 1lb a week... but at least its progress and can noit belive i'm so close to breaking into 170... just a few more weeks... this is perticularily exciting becuase I was in the 170s before I got pregnant with my daughter in high school and thats where I hung out for most of the time.. I'm not nearly as nicely proportioned as I was then so I think I look heavier even though its about the same weight.
I'm a little discouraged by how my body is changing these days... I'm starting to look very... Deflated... My poor boobs are the worst... the excess skin is just.. pooling... I didn't think it would be this bad given my age and the fact that I'm losing at such a slow rate but apparently those factors mean nothing to my body...
soo lol I'm setting up my breast lift/ Tummy tuck fund lol feel free to contribute lol... I dont want to rush into a tummy tuck since theres still a chance I may have another baby... I dont really want another right now but I'm only 22 and still have a huge window of years where that can change... and knowing my body the skin would probably stretch out really bad again. but anyway withing the next 3-5 years I definately want to get those things done... It would be nice to still be in my 20's When I look my best lol
Anywho thats it for now... so glad I have some of you on Facebook to be able to keep tabs when I'm a little MIA around here
 
Hi Beautiful! Sorry I was mia for so long but I had some things I needed to sort out. I appear to be back... Looks like you haven't been in here much lately. I'm in the 4 week challenge too, and looking forward to seeing you around.
 
Hey! yeah i havent been keeping up with the furom for the last few months... I'm hoping being in the challange will have me comming back a little more often and maybe help me become a little more dedicated again. glad to see you back though. good luck with the challenge!
 
You know I think its a good thing that you took a little break, yet kept up the good eating and losing weight. I can't believe your ticker is all the way down there, I remember it when it was much higher and its crazy to see such a low number now. Great job! I'm glad you're feeling better these days. I can guarantee there is lots of fun to be had in your mid 30's, when your kids are older. You'll still look good for sure. Remember, 30 is the new 20 and 40 is the new 30. hehe
 
yeah maybe if i kick it into high gear again it will move a little faster! I can't belive it's there either, it seems like yesterday i was so excited just to be out of the 200's and now im down almost another 20 pounds! and at like 1 lb a week at that! time just flies i guess. the thing that sucks is i find it hard to keep pushing so hard when i didnt lose it any faster working any harder, but we'll see what happens, either way working out and eating good makes me feel good so i have to keep it up :hurray:
 
So in light of my slacking I've decided maybe its time to start an excersize journal coinsiding with my food diaries... hopfully having to see myself constantly write nothing down will be more motivation to keep working... Also i have to admit eating has been terribly hard and it been this way for a while, just struggling to stay within my calories... i'm just so damn hungry! im going to start posting my entries again just as accountability... i've always been one to feel like if i could hide what i ate it somehow made it better... i frequently eat things i shouldnt when no ones looking and my diary has sort of been the same, like if no one sees then its somehow okay or no big deal..
so anyway heres todays food and excersize

Goals: 1800 Calories and at least an hour of excersize

5/18/2009
banana muffin -160
Salad -150
Cinnamon toast -135
apple -50
banana muffin -160
150g sausage -445
100g fries -150
broccoli -50
ketchup -60
cakes -260

________
1620

5/18/2009
-35min treadmill - 2mph - avg.5% incline - 1 mile
_________
35 Mins
 
MotherOf2 said:
yeah maybe if i kick it into high gear again it will move a little faster! I can't belive it's there either, it seems like yesterday i was so excited just to be out of the 200's and now im down almost another 20 pounds! and at like 1 lb a week at that! time just flies i guess. the thing that sucks is i find it hard to keep pushing so hard when i didnt lose it any faster working any harder, but we'll see what happens, either way working out and eating good makes me feel good so i have to keep it up :hurray:
Click to expand...

:party:WOW Looky looky your almost outta the 180's damn girl:party:

Sometimes our bodies need a break:D
 
I know! I can hardly believe it... i dont feel like ive lost that much but to go back and look at 215 lb me pictures it like WOW lol
 
Todays food and excersize
5/19/2009
3 banana muffins -450
300g Pork chop -457
veggies -50
side kicks -200
ketchup -50
cakes -260
_____________
1467

5/19/2009
- 30Min treadmill avg 1.6 mph - 10% Incline
____________
30 min
 
forgot yesterdays food and excersize...
5/20/2009
cinnamon toast -135
tomato smwch -200
raisins -130
steak 300g -585
potatoes -250
carrots -50
ketchup -40
BBQ sauce -60
____________
1450

5/20/2009
- 45 min yoga
_________
45 min
 
Hi babe, how ya doin? (looks around for a second), looks like you're doing pretty good!

I figure we're both back after being on hiatus for a bit, we gotta check in on each other yanno?

Getting more beautiful by the day...:seeya:
 
Hey Karl! I'm doing good still making progress... I stopped comming to WLF for a while but im on at least daily now :) Glad your back too, i'll have to see how well your doing in a little bit..

Yesterdays Food And Excersize

5/21/2009
Jam Toast -105
carrots -50
rice -300
risins -140
flakie -260
chicken quarter -645
broccoli -50
Fries -150
___________
1700

5/20/2009
30 min workout dvd
_________
30 min

05/20/09 Weight - 179.6
 
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Todays Food Excersize And Weight

5/22/2009
apple -55
pastrie -260
toast jam -105
Chicken smwich -360
Fries -360
Ketchup -60
2 shots vodka -138
2 shots rum -130
juice -120
tomato smwch -200
________
1788

5/21/2009
45 min treadmill - 1.45 miles
30 min treadmill
________
1hr 15min

5/21/09 Weight - 178.4
 
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