Cate's Diary

Cate I am glad you are sorting things out in your head. Sometimes it takes us a long time to say enough is enough and walk away.

Yay about the helicopter ride. Sounds great. I have done it once with hubby and friends and hubby has done a few trips. It's great. Next year you can book bungee jump !! We will keep your secret , don't let G read your diary.
 
aiminglow said:
Oohhhh.... ! That's marvellous! What a great idea - you must be almost bursting with the secret. :) (Not just the flight, but such beauty, too!)
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I know, I know- so exciting!
LaMaria said:
What a wonderful birthday gift!
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I think so. Fingers & toes crossed that it will all work out.
Petal001 said:
Cate I am glad you are sorting things out in your head. Sometimes it takes us a long time to say enough is enough and walk away.
Yay about the helicopter ride. Sounds great. I have done it once with hubby and friends and hubby has done a few trips. It's great. Next year you can book bungee jump !! We will keep your secret , don't let G read your diary.
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I'm learning, Petal. G will be thrilled & so will the grandkids :D ( & so will I!)

It's time to start thinking about a November/rest of life plan........
 
I'm not great at keeping secrets either, Han, as I get so excited. Luckily it's only a couple of weeks away!
 
Thanks, Amy. I feel like I need to concentrate on self-kindness & self-compassion so will make it my priority. Thanks for the prompt. I started a new thread & will add to it. The way I have been treated at the club felt really personal & has taken its toll on my mental well-being, so I am going to be extra kind to myself xo
 
Oh I'm going to try and find that thread. Cate I empathise with what you went through and I know those feelings of hurt can linger and actually never go away. However time does pass and we learn to move on and brush away the debris abit
 
If your husband has not been in a helicopter, and you haven't in a long time that is a great gift. Helicopters are a unique ride! When I was in college I worked summers for the Forest Service in Wyoming and did some firefighting. We used helicopters to get to the fires, back then most of the pilots were just back from Vietnam, they could give you quite a ride.

Congrats on getting this kindness thing going, it is a great idea!
 
Cate said:
The way I have been treated at the club felt really personal & has taken its toll on my mental well-being, so I am going to be extra kind to myself xo
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That is definitely the best way out of this Cate. And what an amazing surprise for G! Such a great present.
 
Thanks, Amy, Petal, LaMa, Rob & Em.
Rob- Wow! They would have been hair-raising rides :eek: I'm really looking forward to this. He'll be thrilled :)
I do still feel hurt about how I have been treated but while I am still getting calls (got another yesterday) or bumping into the women I will keep feeling it. Lama once said to me "Throw nasty people to the wind and let them flap." & that's what I will do. I love the image.
I wrote in the kindness thread that I started my day saying-
"I'm a good person. I deserve respect."
It made me feel a bit stronger. It still feels wrong to say something good about myself. It's important to get over this.
 
Yes, very important. Humility is a virtue, sure, but that doesn't mean putting oneself down, putting oneself last, and least of all does it mean letting others get away with arrogant and abusive treatment. Yes, to respect and to your morning affirmation of your right to it!
 
Cate said:
I wrote in the kindness thread that I started my day saying-
"I'm a good person. I deserve respect."
It made me feel a bit stronger. It still feels wrong to say something good about myself. It's important to get over this.
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Just keep saying it until you start to believe it. Like everything, it takes practice.
 
Thanks, Amy, Em & Petal. :grouphug:
I love Aretha & that song!
Yesterday I got really down. G is going away again playing golf with his friends from Monday to Friday & Wednesday is our wedding anniversary. I would have been playing golf on Wed. with the women & was going to have a bubbly with them. Now I don't know what I'll do & I started to feel like a sad sack & got very teary. G found me in tears & when he asked what was wrong I said I was hurt about what has happened at the club. Later on, I told him I had been thinking of going down to see R while he was away so I wouldn't be alone but might go catch up with my friend V instead who I haven't seen for a while. I also said to him that I need to find a new hobby or outlet as I don't do things on my own any more & am too dependant on his company.
I think I will use this week to explore some possibilities. I wish it wasn't this particular week that he was going away. I was asked by his friend in front of about 10 people if it was ok that he went away. I wasn't happy about that. It made me feel uncomfortable & pressured. I have not felt ok about it all.
OK. Enough of being a sad sack.
What do I want to do with myself?
Belly dancing- the thought of that makes me smile.
Tai Chi. I miss Tai Chi. See what classes are available locally.
Drumming. I started googling ukelele but steered onto drums. Drumming would be fun. Check out drumming classes.
That's a good start. The thought of all three makes me smile.
 
Thanks, Tru. Your kindness just made me a bit teary again. I think I will get out and about every day this week & explore something.
It is bucketing down with rain today, so no gardening therapy. Our sheep were in the small yard about to be shorn this morning, but that was cancelled. We'll try for next Saturday.
 
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