The incredible deflatable Lady: Shrinking her way to sauciness.

overtherainbow

overtherainbow

New member
15 stone 10. 220 pounds. 99.81 Kilos.

Whatever way I type it, it is big. It even sounds big in Kilos, and I don't even think in Kilos. Arrrgggghhhhh!!!!

I have lost weight and regained twice now :(

What interrupted my feasting was...

1. The appearance of a dark purple stretch mark, high up on my tummy, unmovable by even surgery.

2. Trying to paint my toenails. It was near on impossible because my tummy gets in the way of bending over, like being pregnant.

3. The realization that I can only dance to two songs before I have to stop... Even after one minute of dancing I am all hot and red faced.

4. Finding no joy in going shopping, only absolute horror when looking into one of them see your bum 360 degree mirrors.

There are other reasons of course, but I am starting to question myself again... a panicky whatareyoudoingtoyourselfRuth.

I found myself buying salad and strawberries today. My fridge is bare... A blank canvas on which to begin a new diet. So why not just seize the moment, and do it now? Now is the only time that matters. I just wish I had just done it NOW months ago, then I would be sitting here slim. I wouldn't be sitting here though.,.. I would probably be dancing around the room with my kids.

My mind is always drifting to my double chin, and the rolls of fat on my stomach. I really gain weight on my face, and I feel ridiculously self conscious. All the time. Being big is robbing me of confidence. It has to change, I have to change, for good. There is no joy in eating badly. I am not going to cheat on this diet. I am going to give it my all, my gift to myself. We only have one body, and it is our choice how we treat it. Our decisions have led to it getting overweight, and our choices can lead to it deflating again.

This isn't my true shape. My true shape is slim, and its there, right now, screaming out from under the duvet of fat I have smothered it under. This is my promise to my true shape, I will dig you out, I will reveal you, and I will love you.
 
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Hiya Laureelee, thanks :) I was in a rather poetic mood writing my first post. It most definitely hasn't lasted tho. From now on, expect lots of cursing, foulness and gutter talk :D

Yus, lets do it! I shall be visiting your diary to see how your getting on!

I remember when I first joined this fat forum, I was checking it about 10 times a day... Towards the end of my diet, it became an effort just to check it once a day eeek. The good news is, that I am in that all-consuming RAHRAHRAH stage at the begining of the diet, and if weight-loss/fitness was a house, I would like to live in it :) Eating my first food of the day now, so I haven't even got anything to report... Only, that there is thunder and thigh-er inside me, when it comes top being healthy.

I am the biggest I have ever been, so hopefully the weight will come off super-quick at first.

My mother had a gastric band operation two weeks before Christmas, and she is only three stone (42 pounds) more than me atm... I can't have her overtaking me :)

My uni bestie has got some prescribed slimming pills (The one which stops you absorbing the fat from your food).

Another lovely and warm day in London :D Have spent the morning cleaning, might go into the garden in a minute and sort it out a bit.

Got up very late today, and have only just three plums and a pear. Will be cooking something tasty and low GI for dinner. Haven't decided what yet tho. I will plan. Planplanplan. Planning is key. I will go and get a planning key.
 
overtherainbow said:
Hiya Laureelee, thanks :) I was in a rather poetic mood writing my first post. It most definitely hasn't lasted tho. From now on, expect lots of cursing, foulness and gutter talk :D
Click to expand...
Thank god!

Anyhow, I truly do get the feeling you're in. This gnawing away at you that you're 'better than this.' The reason why that feeling is there is because ultimately you are 'better than this.' There are people out there who deserve to feel lousy about themselves, but you don't strike me as one of them.

So don't consider this as a sacrifice, consider it as you treating yourself by allowing yourself to become the person you really want to be. I realize that sounds sappy, and if you like I can also express the same idea in language that would make Tarantino blush. :D
 
I am also in the RAH stage. Here's to hoping we can keep it going for a bit. :p I look forward to seeing more of your diary.
 
I've dived in and out of the 'WOOHOO I'M GOING TO LOSE THE WEIGHT THIS TIME' mood, but I've always came back. I think that's key. To realize that we may feel overwhelmed, defeated even, but to know that tomorrow is another day and to keep trying.

We got fat over a lifetime of poor choices, it's going to take another lifetime to learn good choices and reap the many positive benefits!
i.e. I can't stop looking at my slimmer neck in the mirror...lol!
 
Mrvee, You are completely right in what you say. It is strange how we look upon not eating bad foods as a sacrifice tho. I think its like that when food fulfills your emotional needs.. We look upon food as if we've earned it, or deserve it. But more than that we need a body that doesn't interfere with the way you feel about yourself, or your day to day life.

WOOHOOOO Cory, RAHRAHRAH, lets keep it revving!

:D Laureelee, well done on keeping on getting back to it, thats the lesson I need to learn the most. My chin is so fat atm, all the time when I look in the mirror I put my hands underneath my skin and pull the skin up, so my jawline looks better. That will make me the happiest, when my chin is gone, so I can see where your coming from, even though, on the face of it, your neck does seem like an unusual place to be thrilled you've lost weight from.

I have been superbusy for the past few days... My appetite has reduced by a lot. I got a chocolate handbag for mothers day, and although I had a tiny bit, I did give the rest to my kids.

I have had about 1200 calories today, but not the best food- Two slices of leftover pizza for brunch, and about to have some pasta 'n' sauce. It all comes down to calories at the end of the day. But tomorrow will involve fruit and veg!
 
Hello my darling Ruthie :)

OMG i am actually excited that we are going to do this. I have been shocking for ages now, ya know, the usual excuses. Your post on facebook was just perfect timing. You HOPEFULLY have given me the kick up the butt to actually do this and be the size and shape i want to be. :)

I am gonna start a new diary.....Start afresh completely and this time i am going to take a photo at the beginning and measure too.
Loves ya Xxxxx
 
Kate's written on my diary!!! Kate's written on my diary!!! It can't be real, it can't be true, someone wake me up :D Hooray for you. Hark! Hark! Hark! Hurray for Kate!!!

I dunno how I am the one who's making you want to get into sveltesome shape. I am fatty McFatterson. You are the one making me want to do it.

I agree with starting afresh on a new diary... As attached as I was to my old one, it is a bit of a reminder that I failed, oops, not failed, meant had a temporary relapse. Fresh food, fresh diary, fresh start.

A while ago I did do a underwear only video of myself, which was actually very disturbing, as well as taking pics, I am also going to update that with every couple of inches lost.

I don't know how to find which posts you have commented on, and whether or not there are new posts on that persons thread... I am totally confused in general by the new layout, so let me know if you have any tips on how to navigate :/

And my lovely, soon to be commenting Joh, I lay out a red carpet to greet you, and await your commenting with anticipation and baited breath... Don't know exactly what baited breath means, but I like to think of it of the sort of breath you have after eating something healthy. But not something healthy with garlic/onions in it, because I wouldn't want you to recoil and run away back down the red carpet and into the limo.
 
I kind of imagine bated breath to be garlicky. In which case I'm not sure I want any until you've brushed your teeth :)

Thanks for the kick in the pants, by the way. I've been on this a little way by myself, but I think it's time to get some accountability going.
 
You girls are SOOOOO funny. Baited breath surely would smell fishy! ......& maybe garlicky as well!!!
 
Don't forget rank, been-in-the-fridge-for-a-week onions too. Fishy, garlicy, old onion breath. That is sexy as hell.
 
Lol @ you lot :rotflmao:

I will run to the shops immediately and get some sugar free gum :)

Very chuffed at my weight loss this morning- Four pounds, whch is not a bad start eh... I know these big numbers at the beginning are poppycock, and all that, but its still great to see.

I must confess, that my food hasn't been the food of a total food saint (although a hugely massive humongous improvement, I will give myself that). But I have not been eating much of it. Today was 2 shredded wheats, and a small roast dinner, minus potatoes.

I feel the urge to exercise. I really really do. In my mind. I would love to be the sort of person who is fit. But my body just doesn't agree with me. Every time I jump on the trampoline, the rolls of fat on my tummy jiggle about like two great big lips laughing at me, all red faced and puffy. I actually, really, didn't realize how bad my fitness situation was. Trampolining shouldn't be an effort- You just stand there and let it boing you up and down.

I lost my cash card so I couldn't do shopping online. So my plan to plan things didn't actually plan out. I will plan though. I will, I will, I WILL! I have money in an envelope somewhere in my house, and I just hope I can find it to go and do a shop tomorrow, because I am busy all day and won't have time to go to the bank. If not, I will have to just do shopping for a couple of days.

Will go and have a looky at your diarys now....
 
I've found walking to be really good for getting my fitness back on track. It doesn't burn very much and it quickly becomes easy, but it's a good start if everything else seems like too much (which it did when I started my latest health kick, when I was recovering from surgery. I was seriously weak then). You shouldn't jiggle too much, and depending on how far you go, it builds up endurance that you can take when you get into something higher intensity. It's also good for your knees if your weight is hurting your joints. Just something to think about.
 
Hey Girly :seeya:

I was so embarassed when i read what you put about 'kate's written on my diary' i actually sat here, blushed and said ssshhhhhhhh!!!!

I have been just awful this last year probably. Lose a few pounds and then gain them and another one for luck etc etc I really have struggled but YOU.......YES YOU, WOMAN!!!!! flicked that little switch that made the difference. YOU!!!!!!!

Anyway, where the hell are you, you haven't posted on here today. Come on.....tut tut! :smilielol5:

Love and hugs xoxo
 
Amy- Yus, I will try to walk more... Maybe when I'm going to uni I could get off at the next train stop... That's an extra 15 minutes a day, and the tube runs more often to that stop than the nearest one so it probably won't take any longer. my knees have been really hurting me, I am ashamed to say.

Kate- I offer no apologies for making you blush :D I was at uni till late today, which is why I'm not on till later :)

Today, I counted calories, every single one of those crafty little buggers. Despite the huge effort I made to keep sugar down to the minimum, I still spent 200 calories on it. I really want to give up sugar like some of the other ladies on here are doing... Maybe I will allow myself 10 teaspoons a day for the next week, then cut it down to 5 the week after, then three, then go cold turkey.

I went through a stage of a few months drinking at least 12 cups of tea with about 6 sugars in it... That was 72 teaspoons a day... So it may seem bad planning on still eating 10, but its nowhere near where I used to be.

I would like my average calories for the day to be 1425 for now... Half the days 1200ish, and the other half 1650.

Just right cereal and whole milk 474
Sushi selection pack 335
Cauliflower cheese 434
Apple and a plum 110 = 1353
13 sugars in 3 teas and coffees (Drank pepsi max mainly) 195

Grand total = 1548

Exercise- Six flights of stairs. Will work on doing more... Always up and down in the lift... Could probably work up to 30 flights a day.
 
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I feel you on the knee pain. Mine have been bad since I was a teenager, and it takes forever to work up to a point where they don't hurt during exercise anymore. (I'm currently in the hard part of the learning curve- I do exercise in the morning and it's not until mid afternoon that I stop hurting)

Have you thought about swapping out the sugar for artificial sweetener? My understanding is (despite all the hype) that most artificial sweetener is perfectly safe (as long as you don't use it as an excuse to then eat other stuff, but with calorie counting you shouldn't do that). When I was last on here I was using the powdered sucralose from Tesco (it's the same stuff as in Splenda- that artificial sweetener has a very good safety profile, if you're worried about that. It's aspartame that most people talk about as being dangerous, even though IMO the dangers are overstated). Stepping down is probably still a good idea, but it'll make it less of a shock. And if you really can't bear coffee or tea without sugar, a little sucralose isn't going to hurt at all.
 
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