SoSel's Diary

Hey you jsut wanted to drop in and say hi - I think of you often and always hope your doing well , you and your children - how are things on the hubby front ???
 
Ok, yesterday I ate a whole buncha bad fattening foods and then got way sick and lost everything I ate. I have the kid's stomach virus. Ugh. But,um, I weighed 192.4 this morning, so that's good b/c I've been gaining. This morning I felt ok and forced myself to eat a bowl of Total, which I am now regretting. :( I can't get a break.


Hey you jsut wanted to drop in and say hi - I think of you often and always hope your doing well , you and your children - how are things on the hubby front ???

My hubby and I are making a go in acting classes. Meaning, we just pretend things are ok and try to let people see us that way. I'm sorta ok with that. I try to be a Christian woman, which is sometimes hard, but I pray and that's the best solution I see right now. We talk, we fight, the kids don't like it. (No, we don't fight in front of them- kids just know these things.) And I still love him. I just need a back bone. I've always let him walk all over me. My mom is giving me confidence tips. This may just be a way to build up my character. Divorce is just NOT the answer.
 
I'm sorry to hear you're sick SoSel. It's not a good way to turn around your weight again. I guess it could be an opportunity to make the most of. Take care of yourself.

As for your husband - these things are complex aren't they? I was having a chat with a few friends recently and we all had a similar story - genuinely rough patches in our marriages with a strong desire on our parts to leave - that had not led to divorce. (Mind you this is my third marriage - so I know not all things are meant to be fixed either.)

There have to be times for compromise and times when, as you say backbone is needed. I was amazed at the instructions my husband gave me one time and yelled back "I am nearly x (no not telling) years old - I don't need you to tell me what to do!" He looked a bit surprised as though he suddenly noticed that I was not one of the children after all. I don't recommend yelling, but he did back off after that - and I think it also helped me realize too, that I was much more than old enough to be an equal partner in our decisions.

Communication sure can help a lot too, but I know I've had times when I thought I had no hope of achieving it.

Still some issues of trust and feelings of injustice can be worked out over time and aren't necessarily permanent problems.

I have no idea about what's best for you in your own relationship - I do know that you're not alone as far as some of the issues you're dealing with go. I'm glad you have your Mum to help too.
 
Ok, so the stomach virus is in full force. I weighed 191 this morning, and probably weigh less than that now! Ugh...

Yesterday's Food

BF- total cereal, milk, coffee, splenda
L- 3 pcs bread, 2 turkey patties, 1 slice swiss cheese, light mayo
S- um, nothing
D- healthy choice meal (you know, your protein, carbs, fruit, veggies- the whole deal!)

Not even snacking yesterday! But I had a huge lunch. And I'm trying to get myself to eat this morning. Something healthy. I'm thinking apples and peanut butter. It's a favorite snack of mine. (Of course the jury is 50-50 on wether or not it's "healthy.") ::shakes head:: I haven't weighed in the 190's since 2004. I think I'm doing fine!
 
This morning I weighed 189.6. Wonder if I can keep the weight off? And I'm not sick anymore. I mean, my tummy is rumbly, but I'm not being held prisoner in the bathroom. Yeah! Virus conquered! Unless, of course, my husband gets it. :( Aw, but pessimism sucks.

Yesterday's Food

BF- slim fast optima muffin bar
L- lean cuisine spinach/mushroom pizza
S- pretzel sticks, no sugar added (120 cals) ice cream cone, 100 cal snack pack (this is the point in the day when I started to feel better and could eat)
D- pork chop, mashed potatoes, corn (can't complain b/c the hubby cooked while I napped!)

So, yeah, I finally got under 190. What's my next goal? I don't know. Gotta be to get under 180. But by when? 10 lbs might take a while.... (Yes, I'm thinking and typing all at once.) I got it! I want to lose 10 more lbs before my daughter's birthday on June 20th so I won't be embaressed by my pictures this year! If I manage that, I'll do some before and after shots on the website so you guys can see how far I've come. 10 lbs! 10 lbs!

It took me being desperate to leave my house and go to Curves Feb '06. The day I joined I weighed 215.5 lbs. Now look at me! Woo-freakin'-hoo!!
 
So you have lost more than 25 pounds? Wooo hooooo!!

And you're out of the 190's!

Your new goal sounds great as well. :)
 
It is hard when you love them - trust me I know - Ive been doing the same song and dance with my x for 3 years...and we are apart...

Congrats to being outta 190 - woohoo!!!

anyway - you jsut gotta do what you gotta do - confidence however and attitude are always good...

I wanan be around more for you but Ive been fightin my own battle lately...

Your always in my thoughts...
 
It is hard when you love them - trust me I know - Ive been doing the same song and dance with my x for 3 years...and we are apart...

Congrats to being outta 190 - woohoo!!!

anyway - you jsut gotta do what you gotta do - confidence however and attitude are always good...

I wanan be around more for you but Ive been fightin my own battle lately...

Your always in my thoughts...

Poor Pookie! It's ok. Don't feel bad for me. I'm an Army wife and I'm a bit tougher than some chicks. And you being a single momma know what I'm talking about! Things suck. My attitude made it a bit harder on me. I wanted some sympathy. I just got tired of taking care of everyone else. Now I know the only thing I can do is hold my head up high and walk all over the broken pieces. Not saying it's a smart thing to do, mind you. It's just the path I feel I have to take.

But I finally quit crying.

You're in my thoughts too. Chin up. You're awesome.
 
So you have lost more than 25 pounds? Wooo hooooo!!

And you're out of the 190's!

Your new goal sounds great as well. :)


Yeah, over 25 lbs. :) I wanted to lose 75. Now I'm looking at 50. Doesn't seem so daunting anymore. Thanks for the cheerleading!
 
10 pounds is completely doable!

i hope you are feeling better very, very soon!!!


I feel lots better, thank you. :D Thanks for the encouragemant. 10 more lbs is 180. I haven't been that small since 2002-ish. Wow. This is gonna be a huge change!
 
Had a weekend vacation at the beach and with friends. ;) I'm sunburnt and gained a tad bit of weight... lol! It was great. I was pretty active and got to see friends. So having the scale read 191 this morning was worth it. The sunburn is vicous though. I'm back on track this week. Keep me in line, ladies! :D
 
Welcome back and glad you had a good time!!

TAKE CARE OF YOUR SKIN!!
SUNSCREEN IS YOUR BEST FRIEND

Ok - enough yelling ;)
 
It took me being desperate to leave my house and go to Curves Feb '06. The day I joined I weighed 215.5 lbs. Now look at me! Woo-freakin'-hoo!!

Excellent!!! - I was 240 when I joined Curves awhile back...now I am 205...I need to start going back today actually - lol - I think it might kill me...

You seem to be in better spirits and that makes em smile and I know all too well what it is like - to alays be last and tog et tired of it - I get so frustrated at times but my girls need me and need to come first - finacially - emotionally physically - whatever you name it - I am last always am but hopefully one day I will first...LOL
 
I'm glad you enjoyed your weekend. :)

Good to see you here and happy and positive! :)

I hope your week goes well.
 
Excellent!!! - I was 240 when I joined Curves awhile back...now I am 205...I need to start going back today actually - lol - I think it might kill me...

You seem to be in better spirits and that makes em smile and I know all too well what it is like - to alays be last and tog et tired of it - I get so frustrated at times but my girls need me and need to come first - finacially - emotionally physically - whatever you name it - I am last always am but hopefully one day I will first...LOL

Oh girl... I'm actually sunburned b/c I was so busy taking care of my family, I forgot to put sunscreen on my chest... the only place I forgot. I had my hubby do my back and face, then I helped him, and the kids needed a drink.... next thing you know, I forgot! I cried a little last night b/c it hurts so bad. I was also crying in frustration. My mom constantly tells me that I have to take care of me so I can take care of my family. But when and how? My hubby felt bad when I told him why I got so burned. He bought Ben and Jerry's for us to share, fed me (cheesy but cute), and we talked (which we never do b/c we either fight or he's on the cell phone talking). It was so normal and reassuring. ::sighs:: Nice.
 
Welcome back and glad you had a good time!!

TAKE CARE OF YOUR SKIN!!
SUNSCREEN IS YOUR BEST FRIEND

Ok - enough yelling ;)

I put sunscreen everywhere except my chest... it got overlooked. So where I had the sunscreen is doing great. I actually bronzed a little. (I have some Native American blood... my great-grandmother was 1/2 blooded.) But my chest is severely burned, red and puffy. It scares me. I have a Grandma with skin cancer. I just got so busy taking care of the family... Next time it won't be like that.
 
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