monterey01
New member
Hey Spark, I started a boot camp class yesterday to build up core muscles. It will help with bringing the fat % down and muscle % up. It felt good yesterday.
My weight loss transformation (A work in progress)
- Thread starter SparkErosion
- Start date
Glad to hear it! Keep it up!
WOW! You've done an inredible job I've got to say. Can I ask something in this thread though, as it seems you've got some knowledge on the matter?
I've lost a lot of weight and lot of lean muscle as well, it seems, lately. I also gained some of that weight back and right now I'm very loose (It sort of "jiggles" when I move around and I'm just soft and can make rolls of myself from everywhere, it's like I lack the "muscle" underneath alltogether, because there's nothing attached to it). What would you recommend for me? I literally hate my thighs for this, I jiggle when I walk and it looks like loose skin, but it really isn't (I hope?) I can't believe it would be excess skin because then it would be literally everywhere (arms, back, stomach, butt, thighs etc). And there is "something" underneath, it's not just flabbing skin...
Someone suggested lighter weights and lots of repetitions for me, but I think I need to gain a lot of muscle, and that's done by heavier weights. I wonder if I should loose the weight first and then build muscle, or the other way around, or both simultaneously... I'm really at a loss. My body looks horrible atm and I'm worried there's only so much that I can do about it.
And sorry to invade your thread, by the way! I'm just going wow at your progress and since you seem to know what you're doing... I really hope I could get some reply from you! I will be reading this from now on, to see even further development, if that's what you're going after for
I've lost a lot of weight and lot of lean muscle as well, it seems, lately. I also gained some of that weight back and right now I'm very loose (It sort of "jiggles" when I move around and I'm just soft and can make rolls of myself from everywhere, it's like I lack the "muscle" underneath alltogether, because there's nothing attached to it). What would you recommend for me? I literally hate my thighs for this, I jiggle when I walk and it looks like loose skin, but it really isn't (I hope?) I can't believe it would be excess skin because then it would be literally everywhere (arms, back, stomach, butt, thighs etc). And there is "something" underneath, it's not just flabbing skin...
Someone suggested lighter weights and lots of repetitions for me, but I think I need to gain a lot of muscle, and that's done by heavier weights. I wonder if I should loose the weight first and then build muscle, or the other way around, or both simultaneously... I'm really at a loss. My body looks horrible atm and I'm worried there's only so much that I can do about it.
And sorry to invade your thread, by the way! I'm just going wow at your progress and since you seem to know what you're doing... I really hope I could get some reply from you! I will be reading this from now on, to see even further development, if that's what you're going after for
No problem. I'm glad you posted something.
I read your welcome thread too. I've heard also that lowering body fat can make the loose skin go away...however, this is a myth (or must be), I'm at a very low bodyfat (Less than 9% now), yet the loose skin is still there. I've heard you can wait a couple years, continue the weight training, and watch what you eat, and hope it goes away a little. I asked my doctor about this and she said it is unlikely.
The only real way I've heard also is surgery. But it is a *very* major surgery, requiring like 6 hours, and I want to only do that as a last resort. Whats your current weight, what have you lost so far? You look good right now, its probably loose skin. The pictures reminded me of myself . Sometimes its important to remember it may not all be fat, but loose skin too. Or a mixture of both. Fat lies right beneath the loose skin. They 'hang' (pardon the pun) together.
Gaining muscle may reduce it a little. If you have alot, I've heard it won't completely. I was thinking about doing the same until my doctor advised me it was probably ideal to stay at my current weight. I'm not actually sure how gaining muscle works that well, in women or men, I know that men can gain it more easily. I never really learned that much about bulking and cutting. (Bulking is when you eat an surplus amount of calories, but healthy things, but continue lifting very heavy and minimal cardio. You gain muscle here. Once you're at your ideal weight, you "cut" or loose the fat and maintain the muscle.)
Thank you for your kind words too.
I read your welcome thread too. I've heard also that lowering body fat can make the loose skin go away...however, this is a myth (or must be), I'm at a very low bodyfat (Less than 9% now), yet the loose skin is still there. I've heard you can wait a couple years, continue the weight training, and watch what you eat, and hope it goes away a little. I asked my doctor about this and she said it is unlikely.
The only real way I've heard also is surgery. But it is a *very* major surgery, requiring like 6 hours, and I want to only do that as a last resort. Whats your current weight, what have you lost so far? You look good right now, its probably loose skin. The pictures reminded me of myself . Sometimes its important to remember it may not all be fat, but loose skin too. Or a mixture of both. Fat lies right beneath the loose skin. They 'hang' (pardon the pun) together.
Gaining muscle may reduce it a little. If you have alot, I've heard it won't completely. I was thinking about doing the same until my doctor advised me it was probably ideal to stay at my current weight. I'm not actually sure how gaining muscle works that well, in women or men, I know that men can gain it more easily. I never really learned that much about bulking and cutting. (Bulking is when you eat an surplus amount of calories, but healthy things, but continue lifting very heavy and minimal cardio. You gain muscle here. Once you're at your ideal weight, you "cut" or loose the fat and maintain the muscle.)
Thank you for your kind words too.
monterey01
New member
Lose skin on the tummy
Unfortunately, it looks like that the fix to lose skin on the tummy is a tummy tuck. I have the same issue like in the article in the below link. I have much less lose skin though.
Unfortunately, it looks like that the fix to lose skin on the tummy is a tummy tuck. I have the same issue like in the article in the below link. I have much less lose skin though.
I was probably at around 100-110 kg's (and I'm 167 cm's) at my fattest for about 6 months. Then I lost it quickly but gained some back. Then I started slowly loosing it and finally very fast. I think the reason why I became this way was because I lost a lot of lean muscle this time and didn't work out at all.
It's hard for me to reconcile with the fact that it would be loose skin (as I'm working out and loosing fat, the skin seems to be going down with it), and when I pinch it, it's only a very small layer of it on top of it, and it doesn't really "hang" anywhere - the loose fat just sort of wiggles underneath it. My bf% is probably to the roof. It doesn't hang but I can definately grab it - but it's the same texture as on my back, on my thighs, everywhere... It's like I'm "jiggly" everywhere. Arms as well. When I look into the mirror it doesn't look like I could roll it like I can - only once I grab it does it feel that way. Also, when I just bloody walk - all of my body jiggles! My thighs, my belly, my lovehandles, my back...
I now weigh something like 76 kg's, so I've got about 10 kg's to lose. I've decided to put that on hold though and focus on building muscle and not be on plus calories but not under either.
I don't know if it will motivate me though if I know I'll be left with tons of loose skin...
Did you notice the loose skin right off the beginning, and where do you have it? Did it occur in some places later? Have you noticed any improvement with muscle training?
I also read a theory about fat getting more "soft" as you loose weight. Did you experience this at any stage?
By the way, DUDE, your loose skin is BARELY noticeable! I really gotta say that! You look amazing, better than most people, and skin does improve a little in time, if you keep on at your exercising. Great job, has to be said.
It's hard for me to reconcile with the fact that it would be loose skin (as I'm working out and loosing fat, the skin seems to be going down with it), and when I pinch it, it's only a very small layer of it on top of it, and it doesn't really "hang" anywhere - the loose fat just sort of wiggles underneath it. My bf% is probably to the roof. It doesn't hang but I can definately grab it - but it's the same texture as on my back, on my thighs, everywhere... It's like I'm "jiggly" everywhere. Arms as well. When I look into the mirror it doesn't look like I could roll it like I can - only once I grab it does it feel that way. Also, when I just bloody walk - all of my body jiggles! My thighs, my belly, my lovehandles, my back...
I now weigh something like 76 kg's, so I've got about 10 kg's to lose. I've decided to put that on hold though and focus on building muscle and not be on plus calories but not under either.
I don't know if it will motivate me though if I know I'll be left with tons of loose skin...
Did you notice the loose skin right off the beginning, and where do you have it? Did it occur in some places later? Have you noticed any improvement with muscle training?
I also read a theory about fat getting more "soft" as you loose weight. Did you experience this at any stage?
By the way, DUDE, your loose skin is BARELY noticeable! I really gotta say that! You look amazing, better than most people, and skin does improve a little in time, if you keep on at your exercising. Great job, has to be said.
Sorry for not responding more soon.
Not sure what you mean by soft. The skin is loose, and feels like fat, but it's not. I have it all over really. Its especially bad on the thighs and butt.
I started noticing it around 180 lbs. Before I was around 176 lbs after boot camp I went to as a teenager, and I was in good shape, actually no loose skin (as I'd only lost 30 lbs) and very little fat.
Once I got back down to that weight after gaining 91 lbs from my current weight (about 157), I noticed I still had fat. Well, it turns out it wasn't mostly fat, it was mostly skin. It looks like fat. I've heard that once you get below 10% bodyfat as a guy the loose skin goes away. I'm at 7-8%. It is still there. I think this is a myth. I use a reliable machine that most gyms use. I tested it with my mom after she tested her bodyfat at the doctor, and it was the same. So I'm sure it's accurate. But sometimes I have to tell myself I dont need to lose anymore weight. It's hard. I'm struggling with alot of stuff.
I don't know if I've noticed improvements as I've maintained it and lost more very slowly. But, I have noticed improves on the obliques and abdomen.
I'm getting very depressed as my energy level is virtually non-existent.
It's been getting worse over the last couple years, and I've been wondering if its me struggling with my own problems or a medical condition. I rode my bike today 20 miles to go to my therapy class....but I need to go tomorrow too and its difficult. I had a sleep study done and results will be soon, but the tech said everything looked pretty normal. I'm disappointed. I want answers. I want to be happy, have a girlfriend and live a normal life. I've never had a girlfriend in my life. I've never even kissed anyone. I was always the uncool kid in school, despite doing my magic. I'd like act stupid to get attention...girls were never interested in me and I was pretty fat as well.
I know I got to be happy with myself first, but no girls are going to want a guy who has no job, no car (after I crashed my moped). I have money, but that's it.
I just don't have the energy to even hold a job. Sorry for ranting. I'm pretty upset. I'd be happy with just a friend in real life, my last friend I had took advantage of me, saying my paernts lied to me, everything they said were "lies" and that my parents maniuplated me...which is not true.
I knew him for 6 years.
Hey SparkErosion,
thanks for getting back to me, and no worries for the time that it took you to do it.
I think this loose skin business might be one of those things we as subjects attach certain meanings to which aren't really there in the objective world (becoming so darn hard on ourselves and perfectionistic), whereas in reality it really isn't that bad.
I mean looking at your photos man, you look stunning. Your loose skin on the stomach... It may bother you a lot but everyone's got something. We all do. And your loose skin is not bad, c'mon. I've watched youtube videos in the last couple of days and seen some people with literally hanging skin (like it's a curtain, or something), and I do feel bad for them.
You've lost a lot of weight, and you look great. You should really congratulate yourself on that.
I used to think the same way you do. I was very overweight through my teens and that self-image kind of stayed with me even when I lost all the weight. Then I started obsessing over my "saggy breasts" and excess skin... I probably will have it, some might bounce back. My body will never be like it used to. But neither will no one else's, in time.
I thought no one could find me attractive (esp. without clothes). Well, men seem to find me attractive, even when I'm naked. My bf doesn't even realize I have loose skin. And I've got a lot of old stretch marks in some places.
I faced my fear and stepped into the dating world. I had to become okay with the fact I could end up getting my self-esteem stumped upon big time and also probably facing my own fears of others being "disgusted" by me the same way I was. No one was. But I really was okay with that possibility.
For years I lived in isolation and bitterness because I thought I was so ugly. I was wrong to do so.
What I mean by soft is when I started to lose more weight the "outer" "thicker" layer of fat kind of disappeared and now I'm kind of like jello'ish all around basically. Nothing really hangs but I can pull out stuff and roll stuff. But call me optimistic or crazy - but it seems to go down a bit as the fat keeps burning as well. I will have loose skin, hopefully nothing so drastic it will hang, but I will. I will do strength training and hope that helps. I didn't have loose skin until now, and I've got about 6 kg's to go still to hit my target weight. My bf% is something like 25-26. I think I can live with some loose skin, but if it hangs like a curtain on me like with some people, then I might consider surgery, tbh.
For my own mental health's sake, I need to stop obsessing over it though... There's a solution for it, if it really becomes an issue. Surgery. (I will have it for my breasts for practical reasons).
In the meantime I try to focus on the good things. I have to. It makes me happier. Like my bf, who loves me with all that I am, and to whom I don't want to pour all my insecurities to..
Sigh. I need to step out of my self-obsessive circle. When you're positive to the world, positive things happen. That's what happened to me... It sounds naive and silly, but true. And I was in a very dark place once, alone.
*hugs*
Loose skin or not, life's too short.
I think i know what you're saying. Mine doesn't hang either, unless i'm like lying down on my belly. (Or like doing a push up).
Thanks for your reply. I am self obessive too. Being positive can make other people positive too, also, being negative can influence others to be negative around you as well. It's important, but hard, for me to stay positive. My dad is not very positive at all, all I hear is negative. I hear negative about everything I do wrong, "Because I never do anything right." This doesn't help me become very positive. But I'm trying.
Thanks for your reply. I am self obessive too. Being positive can make other people positive too, also, being negative can influence others to be negative around you as well. It's important, but hard, for me to stay positive. My dad is not very positive at all, all I hear is negative. I hear negative about everything I do wrong, "Because I never do anything right." This doesn't help me become very positive. But I'm trying.
Just wanted to say thanks to you all for being so kind and supportive. I've never been to ANY other type of forum anywhere (And I go to alot of forums in different subjects), this supportive. What a rare thing, to find everyone always supportive. People are usually quick to judge - and it's nice to not see this, what a refreshing change.
cowboy48
Well-known member
Hi Spark,
Keep trying- hopefully your Dad will come around. If he doesn't then remember that is HIS problem not YOURS. Try to stop the cycle though. My Dad was always negative and not fun to be around. I had to decide to be like him or stop the cycle and make the conscious decision to be a positive person regardless of what he was like. Looking at your posts and how you respond to people it looks like you have decided to do the same thing. There are a lot of jerks in this world I am not going to be part of that group and I can tell that you aren't either.
I've made a video + collage of different images at different weights and bodyfats and put it together, edited it with titles and old pics. Its 1 minute long.
I was thinking of posting it on youtube. I've always was teased as a kid, And I'm not sure I could handle the harassment. But, I want to encourage others. I feel I could really encourage other if I post it on youtube (There are other fitness videos where people do the same) I just feel I don't look good enough yet.
What do you think?
I was thinking of posting it on youtube. I've always was teased as a kid, And I'm not sure I could handle the harassment. But, I want to encourage others. I feel I could really encourage other if I post it on youtube (There are other fitness videos where people do the same) I just feel I don't look good enough yet.
What do you think?
SparkErosion -
You should definately post the video on youtube.
I think there will be alot of people who can relate to you and seeing how far you have come will help them to acheive the goals that you have.
If you can concentrate on the positive and ignore any negative ones(they are so not worth your time anyway) I think you will get a great response from the video.
You look fantastic by the way...well done
Minimee
I posted it here:
I don't think I am "ripped " yet but that was my dream....compared to other people, at least.
I hope it can inspire others to reach their weight loss goals.
I don't think I am "ripped " yet but that was my dream....compared to other people, at least.
I hope it can inspire others to reach their weight loss goals.
I can see some weird muscle when I pull up the loose skin...damn it, I'd look better without this skin. Wtf is this?
Last edited:
Sorry, excuse my language, but I'm upset . Usually it critism doesn't bother me, but when its to me personally, about something I spent years working on, I get upset. Something I Tried VERY hard to accomplish.
I work so hard to lose this weight and get to a low body fat %, and 2 people completely ruin it.
I get this response from someone:
: "The real problem you have is, why do you think anyone would want to see that?""
"Hey, you know how many pictures of ass-warts I've got flowing around on the net?
If it was too "Low cut" I apologize. I was trying to show the muscle or whatever it is.I've never seen it before on myself. I didn't think it was that big of a deal. But I regret posting this. I didn't think it was bad. Guess I Was wrong. If its really that bad and needs to be removed please let me know.
I work so hard to lose this weight and get to a low body fat %, and 2 people completely ruin it.
I get this response from someone:
: "The real problem you have is, why do you think anyone would want to see that?""
"Hey, you know how many pictures of ass-warts I've got flowing around on the net?
If it was too "Low cut" I apologize. I was trying to show the muscle or whatever it is.I've never seen it before on myself. I didn't think it was that big of a deal. But I regret posting this. I didn't think it was bad. Guess I Was wrong. If its really that bad and needs to be removed please let me know.
Last edited:
Frogged
New member
Sparks, you've done phenomenally. Don't let anyone tell you different. Ever.
People that make asinine comments like that are 1 of 2 kinds of people;
1. They're bored and just looking to stir up trouble.
or
2. They've never experienced first-hand what it's like to successfully accomplish something so extraordinarily difficult.
There is always going to be trolls, flamers, and dimwits on the net. You just have to prepared for that kind of stupidity and just laugh it off. Don't ever take it personally. Trust me on this one.
I've been a long-standing member of a pretty 'hostile' forum. It originally started out as a gaming forum back in the late 90's, but the popularity of the game has died out. As the game started becoming obsolete and the players got older, some quit playing the game and posting on the forums. Only a few hundred from that era still hang out there. I happen to be one of the originals and the entire community has evolved into a 4chan-type style of random crap. There's a lot of sexist, racist, stupid crap that takes place in amongst the legitimate postings. I won't give the link (unless someone is curious). You can get good feedback about certain things occasionally as there are some pretty smart people that post there, but it's mostly just a bunch of bored dudes hanging out there with nothing else to do. I honestly don't participate in the flaming of anyone when it takes place, but I do read a lot of what goes on and I've become pretty good at spotting trolls and, it goes without saying, those comments you received about your video were troll posts.
I've made a few harmless threads over the years that resulted in a little harassment from members on my alternate forum, but it goes with the territory. I'll usually respond to the hurtful comments just to show I don't take it personally. I'll agree and/or laugh at some aspect of the insult just to show that it didn't effect me. Sometimes the troll usually either gives up and leaves, or sometimes they'll apologize (rarely) for it. Either way, you take away whatever 'power' they thought they had over you.. if that makes sense
This forum is like an oasis though in comparison It's just so full of positivity! So I can see how it would be upsetting for someone who is used to this kind of atmosphere to venture out to other websites and post some of the things they've only posted here only to receive negative feedback. Just know you've done amazing and they are wrong. That's all.
Your video will no doubt help many people that see it, even if they choose not to post that it did.
People that make asinine comments like that are 1 of 2 kinds of people;
1. They're bored and just looking to stir up trouble.
or
2. They've never experienced first-hand what it's like to successfully accomplish something so extraordinarily difficult.
There is always going to be trolls, flamers, and dimwits on the net. You just have to prepared for that kind of stupidity and just laugh it off. Don't ever take it personally. Trust me on this one.
I've been a long-standing member of a pretty 'hostile' forum. It originally started out as a gaming forum back in the late 90's, but the popularity of the game has died out. As the game started becoming obsolete and the players got older, some quit playing the game and posting on the forums. Only a few hundred from that era still hang out there. I happen to be one of the originals and the entire community has evolved into a 4chan-type style of random crap. There's a lot of sexist, racist, stupid crap that takes place in amongst the legitimate postings. I won't give the link (unless someone is curious). You can get good feedback about certain things occasionally as there are some pretty smart people that post there, but it's mostly just a bunch of bored dudes hanging out there with nothing else to do. I honestly don't participate in the flaming of anyone when it takes place, but I do read a lot of what goes on and I've become pretty good at spotting trolls and, it goes without saying, those comments you received about your video were troll posts.
I've made a few harmless threads over the years that resulted in a little harassment from members on my alternate forum, but it goes with the territory. I'll usually respond to the hurtful comments just to show I don't take it personally. I'll agree and/or laugh at some aspect of the insult just to show that it didn't effect me. Sometimes the troll usually either gives up and leaves, or sometimes they'll apologize (rarely) for it. Either way, you take away whatever 'power' they thought they had over you.. if that makes sense
This forum is like an oasis though in comparison
It's just so full of positivity! So I can see how it would be upsetting for someone who is used to this kind of atmosphere to venture out to other websites and post some of the things they've only posted here only to receive negative feedback. Just know you've done amazing and they are wrong. That's all.Your video will no doubt help many people that see it, even if they choose not to post that it did.
Last edited:
Hi erosion. I came across you on another thread on this forum and you hit a button with this that i've quoted above. Its so true. I let my thoughts about my appearance hold me back. And thoughts about other aspects of myself hold me way back in life too. I would never go so far to say that i am beautiful. I don't agree with exaggerating things. I like a bit of objectivity. But i can still like myself even if i think i am not beautiful and I can do the best with what i have got. That's what i think we should do. When it comes to appearances grooming matters - good hair cut, good shoes, clean clothes not too out of fashion and that fit well, clear skin. Then there's posture, eye contact, smiling and physical vitality. And then going deeper, there's the way we do what we do (do we give our all), the way we communicate with others ( are we positive and empathetic). These things affect our lives in profound and long term ways and also how we regard ourselves and even our own appearance.
To me you sound depressed and if you've got this addiction to games, then i can sympathise because my relationship with forums has been somewhat unhealthy at times. But i have managed to move on and find room for other things too. Its an ongoing battle though because there is a lot of good to be found on the net. I don't know if the same can be said about games though.
I think you should get professional help with the gaming addiction if you haven't already. You know life is really much more enjoyable than games.
Two years ago i had this terrible obsessive thing going on when an old boyfriend contacted me from the past. It really threw me for a six and it cost me a lot in terms my projects at the time, my wellbeing and so on and so forth. I go so completely obsessed with being on the net - checking checking checking (and not in an OCD way, I am not OCD). I just couldn't tear myself away. Finally, i had a chat with a woman on a helpline one night. I told her i needed to escape and that i just wanted to get away. As a consequence of that chat, i realised I could go. I decided to go on an unplanned bike tour (I had one in the pipeline for a few months down the track), so i went and bought myself a bike straight away and a week later I was gone. I went off for two months. I had some bad days but mostly after I'd logged on in a small town and recieved some email from this guy that didnt' quite satisfy me. But in time, i cured myself of that situation. It was so wonderful being on the road and away from the computer. I should say it wasnt; my first bike tour so it wasn't a hard thing for me together quickly like that. But had that whole obsessive thing not happened, I wouldn't not have discovered how wonderful cycling in my own country could be. I am heading off again shortly for another trip in the outback.
Its doing things like that that help me feel better about myself.
You need to conceive of a project and find a way to cut through the thick ties to your gaming habit.
These last weeks, i've been working on putting my irrigation for my garden in. The last few days its been hard to drag myself away from the computer. I got a reprieve today when the net went down. I saw my moment and ran out into the garden and got on with the job. So I know what it is you are dealing with. I know just how hard it is to do anything else when you've got this thing happening.
YOu need to find something else you really want to do and something that you believe you can do, that its possible.
Good luck.
Fortyfour, I think its important to tell yourself you ARE beautiful (And I'm sure you are) even if you don't believe it. Other people may think differently. I think differently. No one deserves to be called not beautiful or ugly. Everyone is beautiful in their own way!
In regards to the game addiction, I do a few things. I play it (often 6 hours a day or more), go to the gym, and go to my class. It gets in the way of alot of stuff. It gets in the way of me wanting to come home from the gym soon as possible to play it. Of taking a whole week off of life on a merchant event to play it (When I normally wouldn't), doing nothing but play this game. The addiction used to be worse. But, I've tried to moderate it. I don't think I can.
I dont have any friends in real life that I know in person. Ok, I have 1, but she lives far away in another city quite aways away. I rode my bicycle once 45 miles to see her, but it was cooler at the time. Now it's 100+ degrees, and miserable, I'm not sure if I could do it again until fall/winter.
I crashed my moped at 45 MPH going down the road while making a lane change, I didn't hit anyone. I got a ticket, had to go to court, and pay $225 for a driving school. (Which out of my social secuirty money, since I have no job at the moment). I'm depressed also it seems because of my energy levels. Every psosible test was done , I even had a sleep study. I'm in good shape, yet I have high blood pressure still, I have to take meds for. My energy is very bad, it makes it hard even to get out of bed to do anything. Sometimes I'll sleep 9-10 hours, not wake up rested, and take 2 4 hour naps during the day, then sleep another 8 hours later. My appetite has changed as well, I'm very hungry all of a sudden. I did have one GOOD friend, (Or so I thought) who I knew for 6 years. He was another magician like me. He took advantage of me, manipulated me, and told me my parents lied to me, everything was a lie that they told me. Eventually I realized he was wrong, but I believed him at first, and hated my parents for it. I eventually left being friends with him. Now he's trying to get in touch with me again, I'm scared, I don't know what to do, I don't want to be friends with him, I know he has a dark past (or so he says), but he is filled with such ego I can't believe anything he says.
My relationship with my dad is alright, but not very good. He's told me before, often, "Don't try your best, just do it!" , "Where'd you get that phrase from, "Try your best"?, its stupid. Just do it!" I get very frusterated and angry at him, and often call him names too. I wish I didn't, but I am so frusterated with him constantly telling me what to do and controlling me. All I hear from him is the negative, what I DIDN"T do right. I never hear the positive. When I DO do something right, I don't hear anything. If I ask him about he, he'll say, "You know you did a good job.No need to ask."
I often don't feel like complying because I don't feel like I Should! He often tells my mom that she should tell me to do it because I, "Do not listen to him."
I hate my life. I have only 1 friend, I am made fun of constantly on other forums, especially gaming forums, sometimes in game, and I just can't take it. Since I have no social life, all I do is go to the gym, watch what I eat, and practice my magic. My interest in my hobby magic has been going away though, with the gaming addiction getting stronger. At this point, I could care less about life. The game is more important to me. I care about all of you, though.
In regards to the game addiction, I do a few things. I play it (often 6 hours a day or more), go to the gym, and go to my class. It gets in the way of alot of stuff. It gets in the way of me wanting to come home from the gym soon as possible to play it. Of taking a whole week off of life on a merchant event to play it (When I normally wouldn't), doing nothing but play this game. The addiction used to be worse. But, I've tried to moderate it. I don't think I can.
I dont have any friends in real life that I know in person. Ok, I have 1, but she lives far away in another city quite aways away. I rode my bicycle once 45 miles to see her, but it was cooler at the time. Now it's 100+ degrees, and miserable, I'm not sure if I could do it again until fall/winter.
I crashed my moped at 45 MPH going down the road while making a lane change, I didn't hit anyone. I got a ticket, had to go to court, and pay $225 for a driving school. (Which out of my social secuirty money, since I have no job at the moment). I'm depressed also it seems because of my energy levels. Every psosible test was done , I even had a sleep study. I'm in good shape, yet I have high blood pressure still, I have to take meds for. My energy is very bad, it makes it hard even to get out of bed to do anything. Sometimes I'll sleep 9-10 hours, not wake up rested, and take 2 4 hour naps during the day, then sleep another 8 hours later. My appetite has changed as well, I'm very hungry all of a sudden. I did have one GOOD friend, (Or so I thought) who I knew for 6 years. He was another magician like me. He took advantage of me, manipulated me, and told me my parents lied to me, everything was a lie that they told me. Eventually I realized he was wrong, but I believed him at first, and hated my parents for it. I eventually left being friends with him. Now he's trying to get in touch with me again, I'm scared, I don't know what to do, I don't want to be friends with him, I know he has a dark past (or so he says), but he is filled with such ego I can't believe anything he says.
My relationship with my dad is alright, but not very good. He's told me before, often, "Don't try your best, just do it!" , "Where'd you get that phrase from, "Try your best"?, its stupid. Just do it!" I get very frusterated and angry at him, and often call him names too. I wish I didn't, but I am so frusterated with him constantly telling me what to do and controlling me. All I hear from him is the negative, what I DIDN"T do right. I never hear the positive. When I DO do something right, I don't hear anything. If I ask him about he, he'll say, "You know you did a good job.No need to ask."
I often don't feel like complying because I don't feel like I Should! He often tells my mom that she should tell me to do it because I, "Do not listen to him."
I hate my life. I have only 1 friend, I am made fun of constantly on other forums, especially gaming forums, sometimes in game, and I just can't take it. Since I have no social life, all I do is go to the gym, watch what I eat, and practice my magic. My interest in my hobby magic has been going away though, with the gaming addiction getting stronger. At this point, I could care less about life. The game is more important to me. I care about all of you, though.
Sunflower2
New member
You need to seek help, sweetheart. Addictions are damaging. The social life will come if you put more effort into getting out and doing stuff. Join a sports team! You've done so, so well. We are proud of you and here to support you x