My weight loss transformation (A work in progress)

Damn it. I thought I was done. 2 people have told me I'm definitely NOT at 7% bodyfat, not even close, apparently closer to or at 15%. Because of the lack of abs. I figured those damn things were inaccurate. By 8%? Seriously? I thought it was a +3-3 error margin. This is another step back. Well, I'm losing more weight. I could gain muscle, but I just don't know how. Maybe if I lose more weight, it will go lower. Because 15% is just unacceptable. That's average.No wonder I don't have abs yet. Edit: My neurologist said that it was "impossible" that I could get to 7% bodyfat. And that they are not accurate at all, and have a margin of error around 10 percent. He said most likely I was around 17 percent.


I'm getting a hydrostatic dunk test in 2 days..if I really am 17%, or 15%, I'm going to be very upset. I worked too hard for this. I will see if I need to lose anymore weight. Perhaps I was wrong and need to drop down to 135, 140
 
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I really am fearful, I think I have an eating disorder. I need to get help.

Okay, sorry for all the drama lately. Here's the results of the underwater weighing test:

Here's the results from the hydostatic test, although I feel its not very acccurate (I fear I may have done something wrong by accident):

And tested earlier by Omron meter: (Normal mode: 7%. Athlete mode: 9%)

Body fat %: 11.38%
Lean body mass %: 88.62%

Ideal body fat %: 15%

Goal body FAT: 10%

Fat body mass: 17.69 lbs

Lean body mass: 137.71 lbs

Weight for ideal: 162.02

Weight for goal: 153

Weight currently: 155.4

Water weight: 6880 grams

Ankle circumerance: 8.6 in

Height: 67.25 inch

Activity Level: over 12 hours/week

Lose 2 lbs/week: 1797 calories
Lose 1 lb week: 2297 calories
Maintain: 2,797
Gain 1 lb week: 3297
Gain 2 lb week: 3797

What does all this mean? Is it any good?
 
SparkErosion said:
Ugh, just came back from the hospital after a breakdown/suicide idea.

I'm doing well now, hope everyone else is too!
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I care too much to stay silent any longer.

Spark I'm being sincere: I've been reading over some of your comments and you seem depressed and easily brought down by things you consider to be "set backs". Please seek help for what you fear is an eating disorder and your overall mental health. This is getting to you far too much. It's out of hand. You look good but you still aren't seeing it. Other people would love to have your stats.

If you are saying that you are the one that attempted suicide... Please, please, seriously please make the earliest appointment absolutely possible and see a professional.
 
Emerald said:
I care too much to stay silent any longer.

Spark I'm being sincere: I've been reading over some of your comments and you seem depressed and easily brought down by things you consider to be "set backs". Please seek help for what you fear is an eating disorder and your overall mental health. This is getting to you far too much. It's out of hand. You look good but you still aren't seeing it. Other people would love to have your stats.

If you are saying that you are the one that attempted suicide... Please, please, seriously please make the earliest appointment absolutely possible and see a professional.
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I didn't attempt suicide, but I felt I was about to. Someone on the chat boards reported me to the police...so I went to a hospital (pschy) hospital, 2 of them for about a week or slightly longer. I feel much better now.

I'm seeing an appointment in 3 days with my doctor. I'm supposed to get help with the eating disoder/body image problem but my case manager doesn't want to get the ball rolling...so to speak. Things take forever with him. He won't call back the guy...its frusterating. I keep bugging him about it..

I had an underwater weighting test, and was sure to exhale as much as I possibly could to get the most accurate results. And mine is 11%. I used to be 28.8%, almost 30% bodyfat.
I saw this online some where:

13 to 17.9% - men who are fit
5 to 12.9% - most male athletes and fitness models

I can't believe this sometimes. Nevermind, I fall in the athlete not fitness model catagory.
 
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I was saddened to see the drastic change in the tone of your posts. I hope you're in a better state of mind, now. You look amazing; you should feel amazing. So many people would love to have the improvement & progress you've had--including myself. You'll only look & feel better as you keep going. 8]
 
I have been waiting to hear from you again. I'm glad to hear that you can feel proud of yourself. You've done so well. You deserve to feel this way.
 
Sparks!

I'm glad to hear you're doing better. Thinking dark thoughts like that seems to be something individuals like us have to deal with from time to time due to being unhappy for so long in this struggle.

I can only offer a small piece of insight as I'm dealing with a similar mentality related to depression. Someone I met online not too long ago and found an immediate connection with over the last few weeks has recently decided to close off all communication rather abruptly. She blocked me from all networking websites and didn't respond to my last e-mails. Even though she never said, I think I understand why she did it, but it still really hurts.

I'm taking it a day at a time, and maybe we'll talk again someday in the future, but the only feeling I seem to feel right now is sadness. She meant a lot to me and still does, but for now, it's over :(

Luckily, I've developed the ability to use this kind of scenario to push myself harder when I exercise. I use the depression to fuel my workouts. Otherwise, it could easily lead me back into my old lifestyle - which I will never do.

Hang in there and keep your head up.

Things can improve, even if you don't feel like they will sometimes.
 
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I'm having second thoughts. What do you guys think? I just don't want to botch it and gain all fat to 160...

I'm 152 today. Was trying to get to 150 then bulk up, I'm not sure if I want to. I should be hovering around 10% bodyfat now (Hydrostatic test said 153 would put me at at 10%, assuming I kept my lean body mass relatively the same. )

My mom told me that muscle looks good and I may look even better if I gained 10 lbs of muscle. I don't know what to do. I want to look better than I do now, anything to make more progress.

What do you think?
 
Having a hard time right now struggling with binge eating . It's becoming more frequent and although I haven't gained any weight from it, its beginning to concern me. I refuse to gain weight, and if I do any, I'll lose it again. Mainly an event in game that I'm playing that I'm completely obessed with, it starts in 5 days I can't seem to do anything but look up stuff for the event coming up in the game...completely obessed with it. I go to a community center now 5 days a week, so I REALLY look forward to monday. A couple days back I biked 25 miles and walked 6 miles in one day. But I'm not excerising everyday, or even 5 days a week anymore. I'm supposed to see my friend today (Sunday) but its 1:20 am in the morning and I can't sleep. I was going to bike there about 17 miles (round trip).

Unfortunately I live in arizona and it's very hot here. So, I have to either go late evening or very early in the morning.


I was diagnosed with body dismorphia a couple months back. I'm also having weird anorexic thoughts,never quite feeling thin enough. I'm getting therapy for it,I'm trying to raise my self esteem but feel like I'm going no where. Trying to think positive and say more positive things to myself. I hate sundays and fridays because I isolate too much, nothing to do and I play my game all day. If My weight goes up any I'll excerise it off...I'm trying to throw away the scale but I hate not knowing what I weigh. I met a friend who is obese, and she has problems with binge eating and also used to have bulima when she was younger. (purging). We have alot in common, although I am not attracted to her physically, I am happy to be her friend. She is a good person.


I usually am around 155 now and maintain that.

My hunger level is through the roof...I hate it.


I'm sorry this journal has turned into my personal soapbox/whinebox or such. Just feeling pretty depressed lately.

Was feeling better today though. I used to be happy when someone gave me compliments, how I looked and such. Now, I just don't really care most of the time. I know that I have to believe it myself or it means nothing. I have such a hard time telling myself I did a good job on anything. I'm done seeking approval. I'm just tired of it. I hear the same thing, You look good, you look great, which is nice, it helps for a little bit, maybe an instant, then I don't believe it. I don't need other peoples approval I need my own.
 
Heya Sparks :)


I'm sorry for all the trouble you're going through :( Nothing about this journey is easy it seems, but as you've done since you started, just hang in there and keep your head up. You never know what the future holds and there could be something great just around the corner :)


If you've seen my thread and pictures, then you know I can relate a lot to what you're going through. I haven't yet lost enough weight to be where you are currently with maintenance mode, but just know that you really have done an amazing job and you really need to be proud of yourself :) Trust me! I'm not just saying that.


I also know what you mean about getting sick of hearing approval from others when you struggle so much with just seeking approval for yourself. It's really interesting that you say that actually because I've been dealing with the same thoughts recently.. almost word for word :(


I'm glad you're finding others who you can help :) Your friend sounds very fortunate to have met you! If there's one thing that can help with relieving depression and feelings of loneliness, it's helping others :)


My hunger level has also seemed to increase the last few weeks, but I've been having to lower my caloric as well. I've also been feeling heavier depression than usual for various reasons too, so I doubt that helps with food cravings. I've been eating a lot of fiber bars with lesser calories than bars I used to eat (LaraBar), so that might have something to do with it.


It's so tough some days, but Sparks, you're not alone in this struggle. None of us are.


Hang tough :)
 
I hope you are feeling better. Hope you find happiness in your life. I really meant it buddy.


I am having my own issues too buddy. I didn't realize that my face looks real ugly now after my 50 pound loss. I got smile lines now and a skin beneath the chin that hangs. I am so stressed. I look like a ghost. I don't know what to do but I think I need to see a plastic surgeon. I am 32 and look 40+. People think that I am sick and my dad says I looked better when I was fat.
 
Originally Posted by monterey01


I hope you are feeling better. Hope you find happiness in your life. I really meant it buddy.



I am having my own issues too buddy. I didn't realize that my face looks real ugly now after my 50 pound loss. I got smile lines now and a skin beneath the chin that hangs. I am so stressed. I look like a ghost. I don't know what to do but I think I need to see a plastic surgeon. I am 32 and look 40+. People think that I am sick and my dad says I looked better when I was fat.
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That's terrible that your father would say that, monterey! :)


Obviously, you're not better off being fat! The consequences of loose skin can be a pain for sure, but being healthy is the main priority here.


What does your regimen consist of primarily? Do you do a lot of strength training? It can help tighten your skin up.


Maybe you can also try chewing gum Not just for cravings, but to also strengthen your jawline and perhaps it could help with the skin beneath the chin


Regardless of what anybody says, you're NEVER better off being overweight and unhealthy. That's just silly.



And Sparks, I hope you're doing well too, pal
 
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