My journey to good health

shygemini

shygemini

Member
June 27, 2010 - Day 1

Although I have not eaten well today, this is still going to be day 1. I spend too many days saying I will start tomorrow, so it is best to just get right into things i think!

I have not weighed in for awhile, but I will do so tomorrow morning so I know my starting point. I know I am somewhere around 275 lbs. My goal is to lose 100lbs, reaching a weight of 175lbs. It sounds insurmountable at this point, but I know it can be done :)

Previously I was 265lbs, and lost 45lbs, getting to my lowest weight of 220lbs. I maintained between 220-223 lbs (or thereabouts) for around 1 year. I was eating well ( around 2000 calories/day), and exercising 5 times a week, doing strength and cardio training. However, I had 'hit a wall' so to speak with my weight loss, and got discouraged that I was not losing anymore weight. Then i met my now husband, and as one might expect, i got more lax in my healthy lifestyle. I ended up gaining around 55lbs, which is horrible...especially since it was so much work losing the weight in the first place. it is very discouraging having my closet filled with clothes that at the time i was excited to buy, as they were much smaller sizes (I was a size 20, and got down to size 16. Now i am a size 22).

IN any case, here I go again. I hope to persevere and reach my goals, and am looking forward to talking to those on this website :)
 
i know i'm writing twice in one day, but i something else came to mind that i wanted to share (for anyone who might possibly read this :) )

I always assumed it to be an absolute truth that i would not gain back the weight i had lost. That was my first serious attempt to lose weight and i lost, and i figured i wouldn't fall into the same boat that many do. I was wrong. So my advice to everyone is that weight loss should not be your goal...i believe living healthy should be. If you look at this as getting to a certain weight, once you reach that weight you may stop trying. And sadly, it is far easier to gain back weight (NOTE: i mean gaining fat, not muscle-gaining muscle is also difficult) then it is to lose it.

I am going to try my hardest this time, and i certainly do not want to gain back the weight i hope to lose this time around. BUt it might happen, and that scares me. I feel like a failure, and embarassed. Once again, i do not enjoy going out, as i do not have clothes that fit me properly. I have bought a few things, but most of it is too small, and even if i could lose 15 lbs, much more of it would fit.

I am older than i was the first time losing weight, and i would like to think that i am going to go about it in a smarter way. But life is busier now than it once was. I hope to get a good start on things in july and august, as i will get busier again come september.

Right now, when i walk up ONE flight of stairs, I get tired.
I am tired of being an obese person, when i feel like i want to do so much more with my life.

I want to go for runs outside. I want to be able to lay on the beach (on vacation) and not feel so self conscious about my body. I actually don't tend to feel bad at the time, but the pictures speak for themselves.

I want to become passionate about exercise again, as i used to be. I want to regain my love of weight training. I want to feel the joy of realizing that the weights i am using are too light, and picking up a new set of heavier weights to work out with.

I want to stop feeling squished in airplane seats, and movie seats. I want to be able to sit on flimsy chairs without worrying whether or not they will collapse under me.

I want to change myself, and I want to start now.
 
I didn't have a chance to weigh in this morning :( Slept in and was in a bit of a rush to get out of the house. So, I will weigh myself tomorrow :)

I am going to try going to a muscle sculpt class tonight :S Nervous.
 
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June 28, 2010: Day 2

What I ate:

Breakfast- was on the run
Whole grain bun

Lunch-
Apple
Two sandwiches on whole wheat bread with lettuce, turkey, and bit of mayonnaise

Snack-
Raspberry granola bar
Ice tea

Supper-
2 cod fillets with cornmeal topping and curry sauce (homemade)
Roasted potatoes and onions
Milk

Comments- Clearly i did not drink enough today. That is one of the things I need to improve (fluid intake). I also need to increase Fruit/Vegetable intake. I was going to make carrots with supper, but they were all mouldy (sigh). I really need to go grocery shopping!!

I was going to go to the gym, as i said in my above post, but feeling too full after supper.
 
I'm so irritated with myself :( I wanted to do my weigh in this morning, but i started eating breakfast before I remembered. Sigh.

I weighed in anyway, but i'm not sure how accurate it is after one eats?

And i don't like what it says at all..... 280.8 lbs. I'd like to think if i hadn't eaten my bun and cheese that I would be in the 270s.

EDIT: Reweighed myself several hours later, but before eating anything else. It read 279.8 lbs. So i think i can safely assume that i am around 278-279lbs (will double check tomorrow).
 
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June 29, 2010: Day 3

Just a short update today as i'm quite busy tonight

Breakfast- cheese slice and whole grain bun

Lunch- Wholegrain pasta with low fat cheddar cheese
Ice tea

Snack- 2 granola bars, another cheese slice

Supper- sushi (bought)
tim hortons iced coffee

not a good day, by any estimate of the imagination. can you tell i need to go grocery shopping? if i feel hungry tonight i am going to have some grapes (i have a bunch in the fridge, and obviously low on f/v intake today). When i'm stressed i tend to eat horribly.
 
Finally a reliable weigh in ! Super busy this am but i wanted to post so i don't forget :

278.6 lbs

That is my starting weight.

First goal is to get under 270, which I want to achieve by the start of August.
 
oh weird...so if i add a ticker, it only goes onto my new posts? Wouldn't that mean that if my weight updates, it only updates on the new posts? hm
 
Feeling depressed about things today :( I just feel like I can't do this, even though i have a great amount of knowledge about how to do it.

Yesterday I had to squish myself into a seat which was clearly too small for me. It was embarassing, although i don't think anyone else noticed. I want that kind of thing to end.
 
I know what it is like to feel depressed and like you can't do it, but it is just those type of thoughts that could sabotage you. The last time I thought that, by the time I realized what was happening, I was 30 pounds heavier. You have to know that it is doable. Stop thinking about how big you are, or how you desperately want to lose the weight, and just think about eating healthy, and reasonably. Good Luck hun.
 
njoyabl said:
I know what it is like to feel depressed and like you can't do it, but it is just those type of thoughts that could sabotage you. The last time I thought that, by the time I realized what was happening, I was 30 pounds heavier. You have to know that it is doable. Stop thinking about how big you are, or how you desperately want to lose the weight, and just think about eating healthy, and reasonably. Good Luck hun.
Click to expand...

Thank you ! :) You are exactly right...if you start going down the wrong road, eating badly etc...it is too easy to keep going. I am posting daily here to help me keep on track :)

Silly gyms are closed today (for Canada day) or flooded, lol. So might go for a walk later instead, or go to a really far away gym to exercise in.
 
Today I went to the gym, for the first time in a LONG time. And i am planning on doing this on a regular (i.e. 4-5 times a week) basis. I exercised for 30 minutes on the track, walking most of the time but i did jog slowly for 2 laps (about 2 minutes total jogging). The jogging just about killed me. Next time i am going to jog 3 laps.

Another positive thing today, I got a herbal tea instead of a sugary coffee drink after supper. We usually get one every day, but i was strong today and just drinking plain old tea. I don't need the extra calories and it is a good way to cut out 250 calories/day.

Food diary:

Breakfast- Egg whites, 2 slices whole grain toast with becel low fat marg, low fat cheese in eggs, coffee with milk and sugar

Lunch- 2 Egg salad sandwiches (note, this extra egg intake was not planned...breakfast was a surprise..so i wasn't going to say no to it!) on whole wheat bread
Apple
Water

Snack- granola bar ( 100 cal)
few grapes, before i realised they were sour :p
1% chocolate milk- 500 ml

Supper- halibut in a light curry sauce, coconut rice, beets and squash
cheese and crackers, few grapes and apple slices
2 x paralyzer drink
water

After supper- Chammomile tea (nothing in it)
 
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Feeling very happy with myself :)

I exercised again today, 30 minutes on something called an 'ellipti-mill" which i hadn't heard of before. It was very difficult for me...but i persevered and got a great workout!!
 
So...although i exercised yesterday, i also went to a party in the evening and ate a small piece of cake, and had a few drinks...but did avoid ice cream...hopefully not too much damage from that.

I went grocery shopping today and bought tons of healthy groceries...lots of fruits and vegetables!!
 
So, no exercise today, but that is ok I think. Will be exercising tomorrow.

Food:

Spinach and Feta Rice pie
Milk- 1%
2 slices italian crusty bread with butter
Piece Cinnamon Apple loaf
Small bowl choco-mint ice cream

Ice tea

Lazy Lasagna (made with low fat mozza and ricotta cheese, whole wheat pasta and ground turkey instead of ground beef)
Milk- 1%

Apple cinnamon tea (nothing added)

I slept in so didn't have breakfast. Except for the ice cream i think my food was pretty good today.
 
Hello and welcome to the forum! I totally know what you mean about losing weight and gaining it back - it's a struggle I have too! Being accountable really helps so I will continue to check in on you - you look like your off to a great start so keep it up! One day at a time! I'd like to say it gets easier as you go but I haven't found that yet. I do know how good that hard work feels though so let's just work hard and we'll get there!!
 
Frustrated today.

Weighed myself in, and a bit up in weight. It just says to me that although i've been much more careful with what i eat, i need to keep better track for awhile with precise calorie counting and weighing.

i am going to aim for around 1800-2000 calories/day.

Calories do add up fast, so i think this is a good idea to get me back on track.
It is just disheartening that a small piece of cake and small bowl of ice cream can take away from the progress i feel i am making. Last time i was doing this, i allowed myself one treat/week (i..e cake or whatever). I think that will be my plan this time as well.

Still doing good with avoiding calorie laden drinks after supper.


Today i'm trying a zumba class!:party: Never done one before. Should be interesting!
 
chubbygirl said:
Hello and welcome to the forum! I totally know what you mean about losing weight and gaining it back - it's a struggle I have too! Being accountable really helps so I will continue to check in on you - you look like your off to a great start so keep it up! One day at a time! I'd like to say it gets easier as you go but I haven't found that yet. I do know how good that hard work feels though so let's just work hard and we'll get there!!
Click to expand...

Thank you so much for the welcome!! :) I always thought i'd be the one who was immune to gaining back weight...now i realize that no one is immune and this is a lifelong process that we have all started.

I really appreciate the motivation!! When i have people counting on me to do well i think it helps me make better choices throughout the day.
 
Had a bit of a crazy morning. I walked to the gym for an exercise class, in the pouring rain. But, i had my waterproof jacket on and an umbrella so i was ok with it. I did my exercise class, and when i put my jacket on to go home, the zipper completely broke. It has been mostly broken for awhile (over a year now) but today it finally completely broke off. So....my jacket wouldn't be closed for the walk home. Luckily was able to get a ride home instead, and hoping i haven't caught a cold from all the rain!

Anyway...

Walking 25 minutes (to gym, in rain)
Zumba class- 50 minutes
 
Feeling slightly down tonight. I had a good day with things in terms of exercise (see above) and food (see below). However, i am depressed as i went to try to buy a cheap jacket at walmart and XL didn't fit, not even close. Now, they only had like 2 kinds of jackets (which shocked me) but still...really...it was depressing....and there was no sizes larger. Blah. And in case you wonder why i'm wanting to buy a new jacket, it is because my old one completely broke today (the zipper literally fell off).

Food:

Breakfast-
1 cup Museli Cereal – 200 cal 2 grain
1 cup 1 % milk- 110 cal 1 Milk
Activia yogurt cup – 100 cal 0.5 milk

Total : 410

Water: 400 mL or so

Lunch:

1 whole wheat bagel- 140 calories 2 grain
1 tbsp peanut butter- 80 calories 0.5 meat
Banana- 105 calories 1 fruit
Milk – 1% 2 cups 220 cal 2 Milk
Chai tea (nothing added) – 1 cup Extra

Total: 545

Grapes- 160 grams 110 calories 2 fruit
Strawberries- 100 grams 32 calories 1 fruit

Total: 142

Supper:
Lazy Lasagna- around 850 calories
(Pasta- 0.75 cup 1.5 grain
Ground Turkey- 3.9 ounces 1.5 meat
Carrots/onion: 0.5 cup/serving 1 Veg
Mozzarella/Ricotta cheese: 0.33 cup 2 Milk)

Green Salad - about 1.5 cups, 100 calories 1.5 veg serving, 1 grain
Mixed greens, radish, cucumber, tomatoes, sundried tomato dressing, croutons

Grand total: 2047 calories

FOOD GROUPS
Milk: 5.5/2
Meat: 2/2
F/V: 6.5/7
Grain: 6.5/6
 
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