Miss Princess's diary

Hi Ladies! The hike was great! There was about a foot of snow at the top though, and that extra weight trudging through snow with wet boots and pants was hard work! It was so amazingly beautiful though, I'm thrilled to have done it. The Grand Canyon is my very favorite place to hike, and it gives me such a sense of accomplishment every time I do it (even though it hurts a little for a couple of days afterward, it's not too bad though, nothing aspirin can't fix).

I had a little meltdown yesterday, and I've decided that I have to cut my calories back to 1800 a day. That's pretty low for me, I'm very tall, plus I tend to cheat when I go lower than that. I start getting really cranky and I'm a big emotional eater. I was really depressed yesterday because I made the HUGE mistake of shopping for clothes, and those fluorescent lights and multiple mirrors were not a boost to my inexplicably delicate self-esteem yesterday. This was compounded by the fact that I went through a bunch of pictures and put them in albums too, and there are so many that don't flatter me. My boyfriend says the clothes I wear aren't the right cut & that's not how I look in reality, but I'm having a hard time with reality right now. I feel a little better today, I took extra B vitamins, maybe I was just deficient.

I occasionally get really discouraged because I have such a hard time, even when I think I'm behaving really well, getting below 200 pounds. That's really the first goal - mentally I mean. I haven't been below 200 pounds in my adult life ever. I've probably permanently screwed up my metabolism too, I've been yo yo dieting since I was 13 and I'm 32 now. I've tried diet pills, Nutri-System (that was the diet when I was 13, and it was only 600 cal a day, totally unhealthy!!!), hard-core weight lifting (this was the most effective approach so far in adulthood, but I don't have the 3 hours a day I was using to work out. I was down to 202 lbs and 23% body fat back then, but STILL, I couldn't break that 200 lb barrier. I NEED to do that, for my own sanity. I'm shooting for 195 so I have a small cushion for normal fluctuations.

Help please! I don't want to give up, I'm just feeling stuck.

HH- my foot still hurts sometime when I walk on it, I think I have some slight nerve damage in the ball of my foot near the toes, but when I was first allowed to walk again, the heel hurt a little too, and I had some arch problems from being non-weight bearing for so long. The arch problems went away after physical therapy and I wore orthotic inserts for a while - but sometimes when I run the ball of my foot still has a little zing of pain. It's not bad, but it's probably always going to be there. Someday when I have insurance again I'll probably have it looked at. It's not really stopping me from doing anything anyway.
 
Hey You Can And Will Do This Do Not Give Up And Do Not Get Discouraged! You Can Get To Them 90's And I Am Going To Also I Am Not Sure What Your Weight Is Right Now But Me We Can Challenge Each Other Cause Me And You And Christinava Are Shooting For The 90's Hey I May Even Start A Little Challenge Thingy In A Thread To Start Thursday And Motivate To Get To The 90's!
 
I'm at 214 right now, I haven't weighed myself since last week, maybe all that hiking will knock another pound off me, who knows. Thanks Tina, I'm just in a funk. I appreciate your support & encouragement!
 

Awwww girl you're just having a bad day! Don't give up on yourself - you're not stuck, you're always moving forwards and I think you're doing great. Your boyfriend is right, maybe you're wearing clothes that don't flatter. I think that's the difference between overweight people and 'fat' people. When I see someone walking down the street and they may be overweight, etc... could be having a bad hair day - as long as theres a smile on their face, I think they're absolutely beautiful. And that's the same thing with you too honey, you have to smile and feel lucky(especially if you've got a sweetheart like that backing you up) I think you should work on learning how to stop the cravings... I know how hard that can be! There's lots of ways to do it - eating a high protein diet, drinking tons and tons of water, and munching on fruits for snacks. My favorite confort food? - Pineapple! I mean it.. I love the stuff.. I feel like I'm cheating when I eat it! hahaha.. . Anyways - I just want you to keep your head up, and stay on track because you're doing great and you just have to pull yourself over this 'hump', I know you can break out of the 200s, you just have to believe in yourself also - and you have to stick to it too! This time it's not like all the other diets you've been on because you're really ready to do it this time! Smile hun, you're worth every effort you put into this!
 
Thanks Liz, you're so sweet. I'm not even PMSing right now, so I can't figure this thing out. I won't give up. This forum helps a lot because I've never had people to talk to who actually understand what this is like. I have a very close girlfriend who is really heavy, but she isn't ready to do something about it yet, and I don't want to push her, I just give her healthy eating tips and tell her I'm there for her instead. I always hated people pushing me to lose weight before I decided to do it for myself. There has to be a moment when we all decide to do it for our own future. Losing weight for someone else or for some event doesn't usually stick.

Now that I AM doing this for myself, I appreciate all of the gentle nudges and hard pushes that I get from all of you. Thanks again girls!
 

It's totally true - you have to chose to do this for yourself. And you have to be able to see your goal, it's achievable. I like to stay excited about it - it's stupid, I know... but I get myself all pumped up for workouts because I'm thinking oh my god! I'm this much closer to being skinny! And then also I'm always movin' all day long - even if I'm on the computer.. every half hour or hour I'll put on a dance song.. like that song from the pepsi commercial with jimmy fallon + parker posey.. you know where they're dancin around... Hahaha - I'm a big loser.. but a big weight loser! HAHAHA... And I bet that when you're friend starts to see you 'melting away' she's going to get motivated too! And if I get in a bad mood - I turn that into motivation to workout or eat healthier... You'll get there hun, it's going to be hard - there's going to be times when you want to give up, but what will separate this time from others is the fact that you will not crumble underneath the pressure. You're gonna do awesome - trust me.
 
Good morning all, I was a little disappointed this morning when I weighed myself and I still had only lost 1 pound in the past 2 weeks. 2 days ago I started eating only 1800 cal/day but maybe that's not low enough. I don't want to screw up my metabolism any worse, and nobody knows how much I should really be eating. There AREN'T many women as tall as I am that I can ask, and the ones I have met aren't overweight. They're all the tall & willowy types. Asking a man won't help because muscular as I may be, I'm not male & not built or hormonally fueled like one. So here I am with no good information to go on, knowing that just to get my BMI under 25 I would have to weigh 184. I can't remember weighing 180anything anytime in my whole life! I'm sure I did once, but it seems such a distant memory I'm not sure it ever happened.

I think I need to step up the cardio. I just don't feel challenged by cardio, so the motivation is low, and the sense of accomplishment is nil when I'm done, but apparently I need to melt off some fat, and the only way to do that is cardio. I have so many stupid aches and pains to complain about when I run, I think I'm gonna buy a mini trampoline today and just run in place while listening to music or watching a movie or something. No impact, and it's supposed to be good exercise. Does anyone know about those little trampolines? I read that it's really good training for hikes like my Grand Canyon trips. I like to do that at least every other month, so maybe that will make it super painless. Plus I haven't done that kind of exercise, so maybe it will be a surprise for my lazy body. Sounds good to me...

Yesterday I came in at 1801 cal. I did 10 minutes of interval walking/running/30 sec. sprints plus a 40 minute "killer abs and back" video that was led by a boxer who did lots of jump rope and twisting punching things. It was a little challenging, but I didn't sweat all that much, I was pretty low energy at 10pm. I'll try harder today. Maybe I should just break out the Denise Austin DVDs today. She's pretty high energy, although not a huge challenge. But maybe if I do enough of them in a row I could sweat up a storm. Is sweating really related to exertion? Sometimes I feel like I'm getting a pretty good workout, but I'm still not sweating that much. It is pretty cold & dry here, but I'm not sure evaporation accounts for that much. Maybe I'm just clueless on the RPE thing. I KNOW I can push myself harder when someone is working out with me, so when I'm by myself, do I cheat my RPE down by saying "sure that's a 9" when it's really a 7? Just a little introspection there... sorry for the mental pukeage.
 
I Am Not Sure But There Are A Few Personal Trainers That Have Joined The Forum They May Be Able To Help You Figure It Out And The Calories! But Your Doing Great I Think Your Building Muscle And That Is Why The Scale Isnt Moving Try Keeping Your Measurements!
 
MORNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks for your words in my Journal........
NOw for mine:D You are doing great and congrats on your loss. There is this website and it's like fitday but i think this is better. It tells you how much you can eat like fats, cholesterals,carbs,etc........ And it will calculate how many calories to eat daily, how much to burn, what exercises to do. It is really good. Just check it out. Have a good one
 
I'll clean up your puke! :D There's website's that can help you figure out how much you're supposed to be eating.. I just round but I guess mayeb it is important.. I should check them out too - unfortunately I don't know any, everybody seems to talk about fitday lots! I am always worried about my metabolism too. I really don't want to fail this time because I'm putting lots of effort into this, but then I want all my effort to actually make a difference. I think I'lll go check out those sites.. do it properly. I don't know much about those little jumping trampolines though - they must be good for you. I want to but myself a skipping rope because you have no idea how many calories you can burn when you jump rope! I live in an apartment though so I don't think the people underneath me would appreciate it that much haha. What I hear was best was if you do cardio every other day and fill in the off-cardio days with other sort of things - whatever you liek to do; yoga, tae bo, etc. I like to dance like an idiot. It blows off lots of steam and you feel like a big nerd after but it gets me feeling better. Like RDW said though - you're building muscle also and that weighs more than fat so maybe the scale just isn't the most accurate thing. I know how frustrating it is though. Now that I've finished off the rest of your post it I know you do jump rope so nevermind haha you're waaay ahead of me. I wish I had tons of videos.. I coudl totally do them back to back! I'm not sure about the sweating thing.. ofcourse don't measure how hard you worked on how you sweat because there are always different conditions that could make you sweat more like the temp. and what you've eaten prior (high sodium foods will retain the water) etc. I like to measure my cardio by how red my face is afterwards!! Haha.. you're doing awesome girl - keep it up.. I like your mental pukage!
 
hey there! I was catching up some on what all you are writing about, and if there's one thing I know about, it aint being tall!!:D Seriously, I looked for how tall you are, couldnt find it, and am guessing you must be around six feet? (lucky you!) well at least to my five three frame, ya are! anyways, while I know that 1200 cals is the average for women, that is ALL it is..an average of what you should take in..I never understood why that doesnt take our height into account, because what would be too much for a four 11 person is going to be too little for a six footer! we even dose our children by their weight! it only stands to reason that we should do likewise as adults...

I know that if I ate 1800 a day, that would just be maintenance~! If I go a bit lower than 1200, I dont sweat it really, because I go ninety nine percent of the time by HOW I FEEL! At times I go over that, but I think it hurts me much less than a taller person to do that. (Paula wouldnt agree, I dont think, but We here all admire and appreciate her TREMENDOUSLY here... and she contributes TONS!) anyways, I want to go looking around online for some answers here..to see what is safe for both me AND you being that we are both on two ends of the spectrum..
 
HI hun, I personally think (yea you want my advice huh? ;) ) that 1800 is a bit much?? WHy dont' you try 1500 for one week and see how you do??
 
I'm 5'10'' and have been doing 1200-1300. I like it, cuz I just split my meals and snacks into a lot of little ones and I stay pretty well satisfied thru the day. I've been taking a multi-vitamin tho just to keep my body up in the nutrients area, but its also given me extra energy and good stuff like that :)
keep up the good work :)
 
Hey there!! Dont get discouraged because you only lost 1 lb!! At least you didn't gain 1 lb!! I know for me a while back.. I went 3 weeks without losing anything at all.. Then the next week I lost 3 lbs!! The weight will come off I'm sure.. But just give it some time.. I also think you should try 1500 calories a week..That is what I was doing and it's not that bad!
 
Wow, thanks for all of that, ladies! Good morning to you all, and I'll start by confessing that I bought the crappiest thing that shouldn't be allowed to pass for a mini trampoline from Walmart yesterday, it doesn't even have springs! That's what you get for $23 apparently. I'm returning it today and spending the $50 on a better one at Sears. Needless to say, I didn't get any exercise other than putting the damn thing together and then taking it back apart and shoving it all back in the box.

Kate - I'm 6'2", so your guess was pretty close. I picked 1800 cal. because that was 500 a day less than the 2300 cal the metabolism brethalyzer (I think it's called the "Body Gem") said I use at rest in a day. Maybe that test was wrong, but they're supposed to be very accurate, they measure oxygen consumption I think. The logic there was if I cut 500 cal a day from food and try to cut 500 cal a day by exercising (which only happens half the time) then I'd lose 1-2 pounds a week, which is what "they" say is safe & maintainable.

Anyway, you're all probably right, 1500 might be a good number to go for. I've gotten really stuck at 1200-1300 a day before (the apple diet). It worked amazingly well for a month or so, then I hit a plateau that I couldn't break, even working out 3 hours a day, and the only way I got around it was to start eating more (slowly so I wouldn't gain weight - and I didn't) and then bring my metabolism back up. That's why I'm so scared of too much calorie cutting, I think I have a delicate metabolism. This could also just be some kind of excuse. I'm pretty good at convincing myself of anything that lets me get away with being lazy. The funny thing is, I know I do it, and I still don't catch myself at it in time to stop!

I'll switch my calories to 1500 starting today, and see how it goes for a week. If I'm not a raving b*tch by the end of the week I'll consider it a success.

I tried South Beach a while ago, but had fainting spells during phase 1. Maybe I'm a sugar addict (likely). Has anyone had any experience with this. It seems fairly healthy, but I'm not a big fan of meat, I'm mostly a vegetarian, but sometimes I eat fish because it's good for me (maybe 1-2 times a week).

Also, I'm always hungry. I swear. As long as I can remember even in my youth I've been hungry. How do I not feel like I'm starving on 1500 cal? I need advice, I'm such a chicken!
 
Morning!!!!!!!

I wish I had adivce for, but no.........:D Sounds like you have a good plan and you are the only one that knows how your body reacts towards food and exercise. Good luck to ya. Have a good one
 
There's lots of things you can do to help suppress your appetite so that you don't go over your daily limit - I have a V8 just before dinner time.. I put hot spices in it - even tabasco sometimes and it really helps me not eat too much at dinner. WAter is also a natural appetite suppresor. You should be eating atleast every 3 hours though... that way when you do feel hungry you eat! Have a fruit in between meals with a big glass of water and I promise you if you're eating right you won't feel hungry afterwards! Think of it this way - mind over matter. The fact is, when you gain weight and fat.. even if you lose it those fat cells will always still be there wanting food - that's what makes it so easy to gain weight back afterwards. It's not as bad as it sounds! I kind of like to think that when I get back to my lower weight again there will always be that chubby girl inside of me going "yeah you go girl!".. hahaha, but that's why you're feeling like you're SOOO hungry when you really aren't. That's all for me! You're really doing great though - don't get discouraged.. happy thursday m'dear! :D
 
Thanks Liz, you're too sweet. I'm gonna try that fruit, water, and spicy V8 stuff. I know when I make my lunchtime soup spicy I feel like I really ate. I do eat every 3 hours though (most of the time - sometimes I get a little too busy & forget) I just can't help obsessing about food sometimes.

I'm doing pretty well today. I reset my calorie goal to 1500 in my little PDA so it counts down for me, all I have to do is remember to enter the foods I eat. I made a schedule (considering that I AM, admittedly, a night eater). I have to try very hard to get more than 50% of my calories in before 6pm. Here's my new eating schedule:

7am 250 cal
10am 250 cal
1pm 300 cal
4pm 300 cal
7pm 400 cal

and then I'm done. The schedule doesn't always work out at exactly the right timing. I sometimes don't get home for dinner until after 8pm. If it's after 9 pm I try really hard to limit what I'm eating strictly because it's so late and I know I won't be using those calories.

I bought a much less crappy mini trampoline at lunch time from Sears and I promise to use it tonight. I'll let you all know how that works out.
 
Hey! Just stopping by to check in on ya. Have you ever tried the G.I. diet? It is similar to the south beach diet but it doesn't have that phase 1 or anything. Try finding other foods beside meat that have protein. (That's the advice I got. ;) ) That will help you to feel full longer.
 
Thanks HH, I try to eat a pretty high fiber diet, and that's usually low GI, but I have a MEAN sweet tooth to battle too. It's tough for me to outright ban anything because I'll binge on it at some point during some catastrophic fall from the wagon! I like the volumetrics stuff I've read, I like to make my own combination of all the diets that seem reasonable to me. There are just so many I can never keep up with them all.

I've been tempted by diet pills lately, but I'm not sure what that would accomplish. I spent 30 minutes in Sam's Club reading the labels on various diet pill bottles like TrimSpa and CortiSlim and a couple others. I'm not sold, especially since the "best" ones seem to just have a lot of caffiene and a little hoodia and some glucomannan. These things are fine, but that's no magic combination, and I think you need more Hoodia and Glucomannan than they contain to really make a difference. Most of the time I don't need these things at all, but when I feel a binge coming on, I'll pop any pill I can to stop it. It's so depressing to eat everything in sight uncontrollably. I haven't done that for months I think, but I still feel like it sometimes.
 
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