Marsia's Diary

Marsia said:
I really can't change the past, only see it in a more helpful light, I guess.
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I find growing older so interesting--to have a past to look back on, to see parts that I miss about my younger more carefree self, but yes to also see how maybe I have learned some things as well...I remember when I couldn't imagine getting to this age...but well here I am...lots of bumps along the journey and I'm sure many more to come! haha
I imagine all this must be helpful in your parenting as you help another person navigate their way through this sometimes difficult world!
 
I remember 30 being the furthest I could count and people who were 30 seemed genuinely old to me...
 
Emilyrose said:
The tabouli sounds tasty. Glad you are in a positive frame of mind and are enjoying building an English curriculum with your daughter. My dad tried to teach me how to play the piano at one point - we realised quite quickly that it wouldn't work! Hahaha. Glad you get on so well with her.
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Thanks, Em! It's really fun helping K with her school stuff. I actually have a little teaching experience in daycare and special education in a high school, and I like teaching if it is in very small groups, so this is perfect. I am so lucky that I have a kid who I get along with so well!
Cate said:
I am going to concentrate on practising gratitude too. I have been doing Tai Chi outside in the cold at night & that feels so good. It's good to be grateful for what we have. Your homeschooling program with K (& J) will be very rewarding I'm sure. Having that extra quality time with your daughter before she flies will be lovely.
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Tai Chi in the night outside sounds lovely, especially the cold part. It's been scorching hot here. I was watering yesterday and had to sit on the lawn in the shade because I felt like I was going to pass out. It was 107F (41.66C) where we were inland today! It's been so nice knowing we'll have time to spend with K instead of carting her off to school where they'll load her down with so much homework she'll have no time for family. This is such a relief!
liza3 said:
I find growing older so interesting--to have a past to look back on, to see parts that I miss about my younger more carefree self, but yes to also see how maybe I have learned some things as well...I remember when I couldn't imagine getting to this age...but well here I am...lots of bumps along the journey and I'm sure many more to come! haha
I imagine all this must be helpful in your parenting as you help another person navigate their way through this sometimes difficult world!
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Hi Liza, it's fun to tell K about all my past adventures, triumphs, and failures. We have a good time sharing experiences. It's also good to tell her about helpful psychology stuff I've learned. She's very hard on herself if things don't come out perfect, maybe because many things come naturally to her, so I try to help with what I've learned about stuff like perfectionism. But I don't know how good a role model I am about some things like that!
Llama said:
I remember 30 being the furthest I could count and people who were 30 seemed genuinely old to me...
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That's funny! I remember learning to count, and pronouncing 33 as three-D-three. I had this strange belief for years that I wouldn't live past 35. I was surprised around age 37 to remember this!

First 2 days of logging calories, and I am staying under calories. It feels good to get back on track. I had to spend a lot of time watering outside yesterday because it was blistering hot, and I didn't want my veggies or flowers to fry in the sun. I really felt like I might pass out at one point. Today we went for eye exams at the optometrists. In CA they have an eye chart at the Department of Motor Vehicles, but here you go to an actual eye doctor. That was good - we all needed glasses. J now legally needs them to drive, and K and I need them when our eyes get tired when driving (which K will do soon) or while reading. It was amazing how crisp the letters can be for reading, I don't remember every being able to see that well!

We spent the day out - found a lovely big bookstore and had a tea there and looked at wonderful books. Bought one on wild medicinal plants of the area. We have quite a few on the property it turns out. There are some I am familiar enough with to feel confident to eat and others I wouldn't attempt because there might be look alikes. K got a book by Oliver Sacks on stories of music curing patients with cognitive difficulties. I used to swap Oliver Sacks books with my grandmother and we'd have fun talking with each other about them, so that was nice that K likes them, too. Then we went to our big box store and got all sorts of lovely groceries including pickled red onions. I must learn how to make those and also pickled mushrooms. I got a fermenting kit I'll try out soon!
 
That heat sounds so hard! Yikes!
Love the sound of the day out at the bookstore. And the wild foods sound inspiring. I'd really like to start adding in some more healthy ways into my life. I especially like the idea of getting into herbal healing teas and the qi gong....
Do you think K might be interested in doing something like music therapy? Is she still playing music?
Marsia said:
She's very hard on herself if things don't come out perfect, maybe because many things come naturally to her, so I try to help with what I've learned about stuff like perfectionism. But I don't know how good a role model I am about some things like that!
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I think you sound like a really good role model because you seem to keep working on yourself and stay open to growth...I think that's the best way to role model stuff...For her to see that you are still working on things like perfectionism seems like it would be helpful for her to see that we continue to grow and change and learn as life goes on. You really do sound like a really great mom and sounds like you have such a great relationship with K!
 
It's lovely that you have such a good relationship with K but I don't think luck has much to do with it.
You will love pickling stuff!
 
Llama said:
If you enjoy the fermenting thing making your own kombucha might be fun.
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I really need to try kombucha and see - it sounds like a fun idea!
liza3 said:
Love the sound of the day out at the bookstore. And the wild foods sound inspiring. I'd really like to start adding in some more healthy ways into my life. I especially like the idea of getting into herbal healing teas and the qi gong....
Do you think K might be interested in doing something like music therapy? Is she still playing music?
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Hi Liza, it's cooled down a lot, which is a lovely change. It's in the low 90s now, which, before moving here, I would have never have guessed would feel cool! I really want to learn about medicinal herbs and wild plants. I do know a bunch, but haven't really cooked with them much. Tea would be soothing and nice - I used to make turkey tail mushroom tea and lavender, too. K is more interested in how the mind and brain work and how natural cures can enhance physical and mental health sometimes as well as modern medicine, and also in computer science because she's naturally good at it, and it's a field that is practical. She still loves music, but she's sort of a jack of all trades, so has so many interests she can't fit them all in. She's very good at graphic design and drawing and loves to crochet, and she loves many of the sciences, too. Her latest interest is in growing mushrooms. Thanks for the lovely compliments on me being a good mom. I do think it's something I am naturally good at luckily, and I agree, it probably helps that I keep working on myself. It feels good to do that.
Cate said:
It's lovely that you have such a good relationship with K but I don't think luck has much to do with it.
You will love pickling stuff!
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I'm a little intimidated by the idea of pickling. I will definitely watch a lot of videos first! Thanks!
Emilyrose said:
Sounds like a great day out Marsia!
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Hi Em! It was such a nice day. I'm so happy that we have 2 big very nice bookstores here. Most of the bookstores in CA went out of business, which was so sad. We have a really good time exploring a lot of different topics to see what sparks interest in K. I know she has a practical major picked out for college, but I'd like her to explore something she's really enthused about, too, even if it'll just be a hobby. She's done so many things other people recommended and encouraged, I'd like here to have enthusiasms of her own that she picks out now that she has time.

We started school Wednesday, and it went really well. Today we did a required US Government course, and were both surprised that the text I found is actually interesting, and we had fun looking up concepts from it. We also started learning Python coding. Both days we studied for about 7 hours, and I'm exhausted now, but can't sleep. Tomorrow J teaches physics and calculus, so I get the day off, and will plant some tomato plants and get the yard nice again. I think I'll make up some bacon and make bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwiches from the heirloom tomatoes we got from a wonderful nearby farm stand. Oh, forgot to log food today, but am back down to almost low weight, so am feeling good about logging things. Ok, time to try sleeping again. The cat is snoring softly, so maybe that will lull me to sleep!
 
I like that US colleges allow students to explore various interests. Here you pick a lane right at the start and are expected to stay in it all the way. But then not going bankrupt for a master's degree is also quite nice.
 
Sounds like a great start to the schooling--sounds like you'll also be learning a lot this way too!
Nice that K has a lot of interests and talents and nice that you're helping her to explore these aspects!
Llama said:
I like that US colleges allow students to explore various interests. Here you pick a lane right at the start and are expected to stay in it all the way. But then not going bankrupt for a master's degree is also quite nice.
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Is college and university free there? That would be amazing!
 
Marsia said:
We started school Wednesday, and it went really well. Today we did a required US Government course, and were both surprised that the text I found is actually interesting, and we had fun looking up concepts from it. We also started learning Python coding. Both days we studied for about 7 hours, and I'm exhausted now, but can't sleep.
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You both are going to learn so much! Having fun at the same time & sharing that bond with K will bring you both such lovely memories. I'm glad J is going to contribute too. Enjoy your gardening, M xo
 
We're so lucky we moved to a place with an excellent public college. K can start there if she likes, and it won't cost much and she can figure out her major there if needed. I agree, Cate and Liza, it's going to be a wonderful year. I love the English assignment of developing a mission statement for the year. We've talked about so many aspects of life in depth from just a few hours of doing the assignment! It was meant for the parent who is running the home school, but we adopted it to be an excercise on figuring out what you're passionate about in life that you want to know more about. LaMa, where you are can you go back to school and study other things or do they have university extensions that are open to the general public?

It was dumping down rain on and off all morning, and now it's cool and cloudy, which is a really nice change. I found a posting for free coffee chaff (the outer skin of the coffee bean) from a company that roasts their own coffee for their cafe, and asked if I could take just partial amounts for our garden as it wouldn't all fit in our little car, and I live far from them. Turns out he lives on our island, and will deliver big bags of it for free. I have a free source of amazing compost now, which is wonderful because the woods are planted in oodles of azaleas that need mulching, and I was going to have to shlep home bags of fallen leaves all autumn to begin to be able to make my own soil and mulch the beds. Such wonderful, ecological people here!

Ok, time to start the day now that it's nice out!
 
Thanks everyone! Em, I am starting to let it sink in that I did develop some talents that I can pass on, and it feels good to see that! Cate and LaMa, I am so happy about the compost, and also about the great conversations we're having as a family lately.

We had such a nice day yesterday. We went downtown to the art museum, and though it was small, it had really nice groupings of paintings by famous people I like, from tromp l'oeil to a modern photographer who K really loved. She even saw one of his photos on an album cover recommended to her on her music app after seeing the exhibition, so that was a nice serendipity. Then we went to a Spanish tapas restaurant and had a delicious meal of squid with garbanzos, rabbit, giant trumpet mushrooms in a delicious sauce with little bits of chocolate, incredibly good blue cheese, and prosciutto. We had a bottle of very intense pinot called Super Nova, which was delicious, but so strong we needed to go walk around the neighborhood afterward. We met the nicest lady in a very upscale furniture shop with the most interesting sculptures in it. Loved everything in her shop, but would never buy such expensive stuff. But she has a daughter she wants K to meet - they sound like two peas in a pod, so maybe she has a friend here - will have to see!

I think the exercise we are doing for English on developing a mission statement is working. I am starting to gravitate again to things I really love, and I am also sitting down and feeling all sorts of intense feelings that are coming up because of social anxiety and meeting all new people from another culture. There is this quote from a spiritual teacher I follow that I want to remember. I know this, but need constant reminders:
"Feelings by themselves, do not create problems. It is rather the tendency to interpret and analyze them. When out of habit you believe those interpretations, it is there that the suffering begins."

Oh, I'm also back down to low weight. Yay for calorie counting!
 
Sounds like lots of positives going on with the compost, meeting people, connections made....all really great to hear! And wonderful too that you're back down to your low weight!
 
Marsia said:
"Feelings by themselves, do not create problems. It is rather the tendency to interpret and analyze them. When out of habit you believe those interpretations, it is there that the suffering begins."
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I must remember this!
Marsia said:
Oh, I'm also back down to low weight. Yay for calorie counting!
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Yay! Well done, M :)
 
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