Llama

[Llama]

know we both will have existing things we like about ourselves, and we need to start tending those feelings and bring them back to life!

That sounds about right. I may be a weirdo but I quite like weirdos so that's not a bad thing. And doing things that make me feel like ME rather than some blob defined by my fears and other people's expectations definitely makes me like myself more. Which is why I just bought a very simple pair of sunglasses - really I ordered them because they have to make prescription glasses for them - because while they weren't fancy or colorful like some of the ones I tried they were the first pair I noticed and when I looked in the mirror I just _recognized_ myself. Oh, and I got my vision checked to make sure I'm not spending 370€ on something I won't wear. So while I didn't go to yoga I did go for that extra walk, find sunglasses, and go to the bank. And if I feel good tonight I may even do a short yoga video off Youtube.

 

[Llama]

No yoga for me because it's Tuesday and on Tuesdays I call my dad. How do I always forget about that in my planning? He and my mom got lost in the woods yesterday! In the end a kind dog walker packed them into his car and drove them back to their car. Oops.

Plan for tomorrow:
Set alarm and get up at 6 am. Go to gym. Have a large salad with smoked salmon. Do some cleaning. Go to store for detergent, a new toothbrush, and summer nail polish. (I can't grow out my finger nails and I don't like to paint them when they're short but now that shorts&sandals season is here I want painted toenails and I want them green.) Assemble another large salad for lunch, chia pudding with fruit for a snack, and bean mash wraps for dinner. Work. Assemble breakfast for Thursday. Sleep.

Won't have to do food prep because the grocery store is changing their assortment with the changing season so I found some excellent deals on healthy premade stuff.

 

[Floater]

I'm glad your parents got home safe and sound! An anniversary adventure that luckily ended happily.

What shade of green are you thinking about?

 

[Llama]

I worry about them sometimes but then I remember that we got lost (or at least often took hours longer than planned to get home) when I was a kid and we always made it in the end.
"My" green is kind of lime-y with a touch of gold but I don't know if I'll be able to find that. If not I'll get another lightish shade and maybe add some golden stripes or stars. Just not apple green. Never apple green.

 

[Cate]

I love that your parents went on an adventure on their anniversary & got lost. We got married the same year as them. I have to find some sunglasses now that I have had my cataracts removed as they are even more sun-sensitive. I can't go into pharmacies as they're so smelly.

 

[Llama]

My eyes are super sun sensitive as well and my coloring puts me at higher risk of macula degeneration so I have all the incentive to take care of my eyes. And I haven't been able to find a hat I can at least tolerate in years.

 

[Llama]

Having a large salad with 50g of smoked salmon (as well as greens, sweetcorn, an orange, herbs, cashews, dried cranberries, and croutons) for breakfast. I wish I had the time to make and leisurely eat a large salad three times a day. But hey: while I was assembling I did some counting and realized it's no wonder I've been binging again. I've been undereating at mealtimes again. Been keeping an eye on the protein but completely disregarded calories. I hate having to keep track all the time! But apparently that's what it takes. Assembled my dinner wraps and fruit snack so if I go prep my lunch salad now I'll be done for today. Decided to start sprouting lentils for salads to have some extra plant protein for "too hot for stew" season. Because canned lentils and beans really aren't great in salads and I'm not cooking anything for more than 5 minutes when my apartment is heating up.

 

[Floater]

But hey: while I was assembling I did some counting and realized it's no wonder I've been binging again. I've been undereating at mealtimes again. Been keeping an eye on the protein but completely disregarded calories. I hate having to keep track all the time! But apparently that's what it takes.

I can relate to this hard... When the body runs out of fuel is when "liquid bread" starts to whisper to me. I wonder if it's partially from being raised as a girl and internalizing that "big portion bad". Big portion good, apes strong together!

Your salad sounds lovely. Now I gotta go spook myself by googling macula degeneration!

 

[Llama]

Working with elderly people can really make you paranoid

I wonder if it's partially from being raised as a girl and internalizing that "big portion bad".

For me it's more that I've always struggled with large portions and the well-meant pressure I got to eat the amount I "needed" just made it worse. I think it's getting better though, if I remember to focus on it.

Big portion good, apes strong together!

Exactly.

 

[Llama]

Oh, and I did find a wonderful shade of nail polish: Essie's tropical low. Probably the easiest to apply polish I've ever used. Now let's hope it doesn't start chipping too quickly.

 

[Floater]

I spied the shade and it's really pretty! I like the brand, but I'm too lazy to do my nails. I have Essie's Chinchilly and I have had Licorice too. I wonder if my bottle of Chinchilly is still usable.

 

[Llama]

If it's only 5 minutes once a week I'm ok with nail polish. If I have to redo it every couple of days... Maybe not.
Realized I'd used up all my greens just as I was about to head out to work so half-ran to the store to make up for it aaand then the registry was jammed and instead of switching to another one right away they had to wait for the manager so I had to leave my greens behind in order to make it to work in time Which I did. But now I have to go to the one store still open after I'm done with my shift at a time when I'm at risk of binging. Focus: buy greens. All you need are greens.

 

[Marsia]

I think it's wonderful to be a weirdo. Non-weirdos are kinda predictable and you don't really know who they really are until you get super close to them. As a fellow weirdo, I want to be a lot more open and free, too! Oh, and forgot to say, please post a pic of your crocheted scarf in progress. I would love to get back to crocheting and miss it.

I'm glad you mentioned hats because I saw a really practical one in the hardware store with ventilation holes in the sides, but it was a little more than I usually pay for all the hats I don't use because they are too darn hot. So I think I'll go back and try that because I am getting a rather sunburnt face here. So glad you found glasses that make you feel more like you. I love when that happens with clothes and such. And that you found nail polish in your shade, too. Love how you are making sure you feel comfortable with yourself!!

Poor parents, but glad they found someone to bring them back to their car!

So glad you found the culprit as far as binging! I've been making sure to eat enough carbs, and since I can't measure, I worry it is making me stay at the same weight, but better to error on eating enough food and lose slowly than slip and go off plan altogether. Sprouting lentils sounds really good. Maybe I'll try that!

 

[Llama]

please post a pic of your crocheted scarf in progress. I would love to get back to crocheting and miss it.

I haven't started yet but if I do I'll be sure to keep you posted. I love crocheting but I have to be careful not to stress my hands too much on top of work.

So glad you found the culprit as far as binging!

I really hope that's the main problem... Had some extra nuts and fruit today and didn't feel tempted so there's hope.

Sprouting lentils sounds really good. Maybe I'll try that!

I just changed the water on my first batch. Will look up how long they need to soak tomorrow but I think it's two days. I just hope they won't taste too "green": I need hearty meals and I need them to be low-effort and to not produce heat in the summer, so...

Had a good day. Am tired. Got breakfast wraps and a fruit&seeds snack packed up in the fridge and my lunch salad is mostly assembled as well. Dinner could be sweet&sour tempeh, sushi, or another salad.

 

[Cate]

I am yet to find a hat that I feel like me in. I have a blue one that I can just bare & will take it with me when we head North. Your food all sounds good, LaMa xo

 

[Marsia]

Let me know what you think of the lentil sprouts once they are done. I completely forgot that you can sprout beans, and then just saw an article on that.

So glad to hear the extra nuts and fruit and counting to make sure you got enough calories helps!!!

 

[Llama]

I am yet to find a hat that I feel like me in.

I've had two I loved. One just fell apart because I wore it so much for years and the other went missing during my parents move 10 or so years ago. Never found a decent replacement.

So glad to hear the extra nuts and fruit and counting to make sure you got enough calories helps!!!

Your optimism based on only one day is awe-inspiring!

Two colleagues are at home with covid so I had to switch to groups again. No like. But I made it through. Have some solid DOMS but I also stretched my neck/shoulder area regularly so I'm curious to see what the massage therapist is going to see later.
Didn't have time to eat in peace because being on groups is trash so I'd love to binge now but I have a delicious salad prepped so I'm not going to.

 

[Marsia]

Darn, I try to be a pessimist to override my inherent optimistic, bordering on naive side, but it always sneaks back out! It is so weird how I just can not remember that binging is a long term pattern for you. I was like that with my mom's grouchiness, too. I get it from my grandmother, I think.

That stinks about the schedule change. Please be extra cautious with eating well so you lessen the odds of catching Covid (and sorry to sound mom-like!).

 

[Llama]

Thanks Marsia and Floater
I started binging over 25 years ago so I guess I'm a pathological optimist too, for thinking I may be able to get a grip on it long-term at some point but here we go. Better to have too much hope than none at all.
I forgot to add carbs to my lunch... Then after my massage I got so heavy-bodied and light-headed I wasn't sure I'd make it home for a second. So I had what I thought would be an early dinner and once I started eating I stopped caring about anything except putting food into my body. I didn't eat anything unhealthy but definitely had way more than what I needed. So... healthy binge? Better than an unhealthy binge, at least. Not yet sure if I want to run later tonight once my stomach is less full or if I'll just go for a walk today and run tomorrow. Either would be fine, really.

 

[Llama]

Neither the run nor the walk happened and I'm going to sleep too late. That's what happens when I get too tired/hungry and then overcompensate.

Tomorrow I WILL run and if at all possible I'll look into the workwear store to see if they have all-white shorts. Usually the only white shorts you can wash hot enough are for painters and they tend to have dark patches which would look weird in my workplace. Wouldn't mind the big pockets though!