Journey, Not A Destination

Nice blog entry... I can't do rigid exercise -I frustrate entirely too easily... though moving more helps some for weight loss -but doesn't mean bubkiss unless eating is also under control...
 
maleficent said:
Nice blog entry... I can't do rigid exercise -I frustrate entirely too easily... though moving more helps some for weight loss -but doesn't mean bubkiss unless eating is also under control...
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Yea, I agree. Moving more is nothing magic and I maybe should have conveyed that in the post better. It's simply a good buffer and aid, for lack of better terms. For those who have trouble staying in small caloric deficits consistently, it can be just what they need. For others who are strong willed, it may or may not help.

But using our bodies is much better than spending most of our time on our asses, regardless of weight loss, if you ask me.
 
you conveyed it fine - it's just me - being me :)

I just find it interesting from my own personal experience anyhow -that for years I always heard that advice -well - just move more.... but I rarely just sat on my butt... I always walked - Didnt own a car for the past 10 years or so walking was my option.. and yet moving more - I jsut got fatter and fatter year after year...
 
Well certainly the advice isn't applicable to someone who already moves a shit ton, as you do. To boot, and as you know from experience, moving a shit ton doesn't mean jack if food isn't lined up with your goals.

The advice is more for those who don't move a lot, which in my experience is a lot of people. And even for them, it's not going to save the day. But it can make a difference.

And you know all this. :)
 
I like the blog too--kind of reminds me of my mindset lately, cause when I'm vacuuming and doing laundry (not complaining, but I do have a flight of stairs to go up and down to get to the washer/dryer) I think "I'm using energy--this is good." And other times I think "Oh, I didn't run or kickbox today, I didn't really get any exercise." Then I remind myself, "well, I danced for an hour and did Yoga for another hour, that's two hours I could have spent sitting on my ass drinking beer, so it counts for something!" Thanks for reminding me I'm starting to reach a middle ground in a lot of things. Especially drinking. I'm proud to say I haven't been wasted to the point of a next day hangover since August. That might not impress some people, but other partiers my age might give me props! I give myself propz :)
 
Thanks, and I give ya props. We're a society that likes to think in extreme terms. If you aren't on one end of the spectrum, you're on the other.

More often than not, someplace in the middle is ideal.

But then again, is your ideal the same as my ideal? Most likely not. But this doesn't change the fact that being at the extreme ends of any spectrum is usually accompanied by many negatives.
 
True, but it can be a good learning experience.

I enjoyed each side of the spectrum. When I realized its detriment, I tried to slid more toward a happy medium. I sometimes went back, failing time and time again. That is OK--I still treasure the experiences.
 
I'm with you 100%.

Trust me I've been and will be in the future at extreme ends of particular spectrums. In some instances you can be nothing else.

I suppose what I'm talking about needs some context. If 'life' isn't working out relative to your intent and desire and your 'filter' is only seeing things as black or white, either/or... things need to change.
 
Hey Steve,

I sometimes feel like I'm at certain ends of spectrums too. Or at least my mindset is... I always feel like I have to "be" a certain way and sometimes things are so black and white in my head... I really doubt myself and my abilities a lot more than I should and I don't think I give myself credit for enough of the positive things I have going on in my life when i really take a look at it. I'm just extremely hard on myself and I always feel like I need to be 3 steps ahead of everything thats going on but, a lot of the time it backfires or is just so un-neccessary. I truly don't mean this to sound all sad and whiney but that last thing you said does make a lot of sense to me and hits home in a way... I guess I just see things as really black/white and right/wrong for myself, with no gray in between. When it comes to others though I'm so not judgemental and I accept everyone...

-Sam
 
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sammyboy24 said:
Hey Steve,

I sometimes feel like I'm at certain ends of spectrums too. Or at least my mindset is... I always feel like I have to "be" a certain way and sometimes things are so black and white in my head... I really doubt myself and my abilities a lot more than I should and I don't think I give myself credit for enough of the positive things I have going on in my life when i really take a look at it. I'm just extremely hard on myself and I always feel like I need to be 3 steps ahead of everything thats going on but, a lot of the time it backfires or is just so un-neccessary. I truly don't mean this to sound all sad and whiney but that last thing you said does make a lot of sense to me and hits home in a way... I guess I just see things as really black/white and right/wrong for myself, with no gray in between. When it comes to others though I'm so not judgemental and I accept everyone...

-Sam
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I can relate to this, Sam. A lot.

I used to have such high expectations and anything but what I expected would bring me down, make me angry, etc. What's more is the fact that what we expect to happen... the way we expect things to unfold... rarely occurs.

I think it's quite common to have extremely rigid mindsets. The world is so damn dynamic that basing how you feel on said rigidity and expectations really sets yourself up for failure or hardship.

At least in my experience.

I spent a lot of time evaluating my thought patterns. I found a number of mental constructs that didn't mesh well with reality. Yet, if I never identified them, they would have been automatic forever and dictated not only how I percieved things, but also how I felt.

Dr. David Burns... a psychologist whom I really admire wrote about 10 "cognitive distortions" that are all too common this day and age in our society. I thought it was a great list and I thought he described them very well in his book, "Feeling Good."

On the list was:

1. All-or-nothing thinking - Talk about a popular one! If you aren't 100% you're a zero. Dieters have this 'distortion' all the time. Lyle McDonald talked about it in my interview with him in my blog recently.

2. Over-Generalization - You take one negative event and lay it over all future events in your life. "I failed at losing weight this time so I will forever fail and might as well not even try." Or, "I wasn't accepted by this guy so I'm sure all guys will not be interested in me."

3. Negative Mental Filtering - With this you tend to focus solely on the negative aspects of anything. I find a lot of people in the weight loss world do this too... their weight goes up a pound yet, they're looking and feeling so much better, they're measurements are going in the right direction and there are many people commenting on how great they look. Yet, they can't get passed the fact that the scale is up one pound and they aren't happy. Makes no sense but very real. All of these distortions lead to illogical behavior and thoughts.

4. Disqualifying the Positive - This is a poplular one for those who have a hard time accepting compliments. I can tell you you're an idiot and it will turn your world upside down but if I told you you're a brilliant, fun, good looking, caring man... you'd write it off as meaningless. Tough to feel good about yourself when you're seeing the world through these sort of lenses!

5. Jumping to Conclusions - Another popular one... I'm unhappy now so I'll be unhappy tomorrow. What a self-fulfilling prophecy this can be!

6. Magnification/Minimization - Similar to a couple of those above, here you magnify the bad stuff and minimize the good stuff. I'm typing this shit from memory and I haven't read the book in a while so if you're interested, the book is cheap and easy to read. Or I'm sure you can find stuff on the web about it.

7. Emotional Reasoning -- Here your ability to think critically goes out the window. You allow how you feel to influence all of your decisions.

8. Should Statements - rigidity at its purest

9. Labeling - I am a failure opposed to I failed. Huge difference which plays out in how you feel and respond.

10. Personalization - My dad's death is my fault, forgetting the fact that he died from a heart attack.

******

Powerful stuff man.
 
Steve said:
I can relate to this, Sam. A lot.

I used to have such high expectations and anything but what I expected would bring me down, make me angry, etc. What's more is the fact that what we expect to happen... the way we expect things to unfold... rarely occurs.

I think it's quite common to have extremely rigid mindsets. The world is so damn dynamic that basing how you feel on said rigidity and expectations really sets yourself up for failure or hardship.

At least in my experience.

I spent a lot of time evaluating my thought patterns. I found a number of mental constructs that didn't mesh well with reality. Yet, if I never identified them, they would have been automatic forever and dictated not only how I percieved things, but also how I felt.

Dr. David Burns... a psychologist whom I really admire wrote about 10 "cognitive distortions" that are all too common this day and age in our society. I thought it was a great list and I thought he described them very well in his book, "Feeling Good."

On the list was:

1. All-or-nothing thinking - Talk about a popular one! If you aren't 100% you're a zero. Dieters have this 'distortion' all the time. Lyle McDonald talked about it in my interview with him in my blog recently.

2. Over-Generalization - You take one negative event and lay it over all future events in your life. "I failed at losing weight this time so I will forever fail and might as well not even try." Or, "I wasn't accepted by this guy so I'm sure all guys will not be interested in me."

3. Negative Mental Filtering - With this you tend to focus solely on the negative aspects of anything. I find a lot of people in the weight loss world do this too... their weight goes up a pound yet, they're looking and feeling so much better, they're measurements are going in the right direction and there are many people commenting on how great they look. Yet, they can't get passed the fact that the scale is up one pound and they aren't happy. Makes no sense but very real. All of these distortions lead to illogical behavior and thoughts.

4. Disqualifying the Positive - This is a poplular one for those who have a hard time accepting compliments. I can tell you you're an idiot and it will turn your world upside down but if I told you you're a brilliant, fun, good looking, caring man... you'd write it off as meaningless. Tough to feel good about yourself when you're seeing the world through these sort of lenses!

5. Jumping to Conclusions - Another popular one... I'm unhappy now so I'll be unhappy tomorrow. What a self-fulfilling prophecy this can be!

6. Magnification/Minimization - Similar to a couple of those above, here you magnify the bad stuff and minimize the good stuff. I'm typing this shit from memory and I haven't read the book in a while so if you're interested, the book is cheap and easy to read. Or I'm sure you can find stuff on the web about it.

7. Emotional Reasoning -- Here your ability to think critically goes out the window. You allow how you feel to influence all of your decisions.

8. Should Statements - rigidity at its purest

9. Labeling - I am a failure opposed to I failed. Huge difference which plays out in how you feel and respond.

10. Personalization - My dad's death is my fault, forgetting the fact that he died from a heart attack.

******

Powerful stuff man.
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Sheesh Steve, I am trying my hardest to count the catigories I dont fit into...

Great perspective! although a bit scary as they all seem to refer to me LOL
 
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