Well, here goes, right? I don't know how it happened. Really, I knew I was overweight, but not this much. I have always had a bit of a struggle with my weight (who am I kidding, here? a bit!!! that's an understatement). Since I was about 12 or 13 I have steadily gained and lost weight, and have yo-yo'd for the past ten years. My lowest weight was in high school when I was on the swim team. I stayed around a healthy size 6 for a little while, then ballooned up to a 10. After that, I would go up a size occasionally, always telling myself I would never go above a certain size, and always breaking that in a cycle of binge eating and hiding my eating habits from my always-thin family.
My problem is binge eating when nobody's looking--it's like I believe that if nobody sees you eat it, the calories don't count. And then I feel terrible about it and vow to do better, but never actually do anything.
Well, I've really decided to change all that. I'm at my highest weight ever, and I'm even too ashamed to post it on this blog. Let's just say that i'd be ok if I were 6'2", but I'm only 5'2". The main reason I want to change my habits is for my son. I don't want him to go through the same yo-yo/binge eating cycle as me, I don't want him to be embarassed of me (which he's not, but he's only 2), and I really don't want to be so unhealthy that just playing with him leaves me tired. I can't even run around outside with my kid! I feel so terrible about that.
I'm hoping that this blog will help me with motivation. I hope that you will post comments of support and help me to stay motivated so I don't go through the yo-yo/binge cycle again. I know there will be days that are really hard, but I know they will all be worth it.
I will be posting daily about what's going on in life and in my head as an outlet, so please feel free to stop on by anytime.
My next post will be about my exercise program and diet. Stay tuned folks!
My problem is binge eating when nobody's looking--it's like I believe that if nobody sees you eat it, the calories don't count. And then I feel terrible about it and vow to do better, but never actually do anything.
Well, I've really decided to change all that. I'm at my highest weight ever, and I'm even too ashamed to post it on this blog. Let's just say that i'd be ok if I were 6'2", but I'm only 5'2". The main reason I want to change my habits is for my son. I don't want him to go through the same yo-yo/binge eating cycle as me, I don't want him to be embarassed of me (which he's not, but he's only 2), and I really don't want to be so unhealthy that just playing with him leaves me tired. I can't even run around outside with my kid! I feel so terrible about that.
I'm hoping that this blog will help me with motivation. I hope that you will post comments of support and help me to stay motivated so I don't go through the yo-yo/binge cycle again. I know there will be days that are really hard, but I know they will all be worth it.
I will be posting daily about what's going on in life and in my head as an outlet, so please feel free to stop on by anytime.
My next post will be about my exercise program and diet. Stay tuned folks!

and with all the stress of planning the wedding, not to mention all the celebrations, I gained nearly 20 lbs in 3 months. I had gastric bypass surgery in December 2002 and that jumpstarted my weight loss....but I got lazy.....and that's how I gained some of it back. I've gone to the store and got healthier foods, and started working out 7 days a week -- I'm doing some weight training but mostly I do walking/treadmill for 35-40 minutes twice a day. So far I've not lost any weight, but I think I'm gaining muscle. It's a bit frustrating because I'd really like to lose WEIGHT, but I know how it works.