I'm fat and have no motivation

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AriesQ4

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I'm trying to build up the motivation to get back in the gym (or at least do at home workouts) and start eating right. I have NO motivation. I have about a 100lbs to lose and the whole task just seems so daunting. Any advice on how I can get my energy and self esteem to a place that would make me even want to give it a millionth try. By the way i'm a single mom who works full-time. I'm utterly exhausted.:lurk5:
 
 
I totally hear you.......it takes me a couples week of "prep" in order to get motivated to actually start 'dieting'. I've spent the last two weeks or so talking to people here, doing a lot of reading and planning, and getting prepared. I brought my bike to get tuned up. I found a running program that I'm going to start.

I guess what's different for me this time is I'm not going to go from 0 to 100 in one day. I'm going to do things more gradually, I think that will make it more likely to stick. For example....right now, I've just been walking every night for 30 - 60 minutes....and plan to begin the couch to 5K this week. I also haven't really made any huge changes in my diet yet....only trying to be more conscious of what I'm eating and cutting down.

Hopefully since I don't have to gear up for this huge life changing event, the motivation factor won't be so consuming. Maybe baby steps is best??? I figure you must be super busy if your a single mom. I know I am and I have my husband to help out (if that's what you call it). It's tough to want to work out in that little bit of free, quiet time that you have....I know I have to sneak out of the house for my nightly walks, and if my daughter catches me, we have a complete melt down cuz she wants to come.

I just try to remember how much of a better mom I am when I have energy and am in shape, not to mention the fact that I will be around longer if I'm healthy!!

Keep thinking positive and make small changes until you get the motivation you need!
 
Lalbon’s right in starting slowly and gradually build up your weight loss plan through baby steps. That will help with making exercise habits stick. Take things day by day and don’t beat yourself up if one day doesn’t go well in terms of exercising. You’re a single mom who’s working full-time. That’s a lot of work. I’m a weight control professional with a newborn, and even I am finding the time and energy to exercise to be challenging at times. Could you take your child on walks with you? Could you “work-in” physical activity during your day, like take the elevator instead of stairs? Could you go for a walk or go to the gym during your lunch break? You’re doing the right thing by getting support from these forums. Losing weight can be challenging and frustrating at times. Remember that there are people who are cheering you on.
 
AriesQ4 - maybe you will be inspired by something you have never heard of before...not the usual diet...something completely revolutionary but safe and highly effective...
 
What I try to do is make small goals to help me stay motivated. I know I need to lose 63 pounds, but my first goal is 10 lbs. Then once I hit that goal, I'm gonna reward myself with something nice like a new shirt or pair of jeans. Instead of think about the total amount of weight you want to lose, break it up into smaller bits. That makes it a little less overwhelming. Hang in there and keep up the good work. You will reach your goal. Just be patient with yourself and remember you are worth it!!!
 
Some really good advice has been given about baby steps. Try not to overwhelm yourself.

- try meal planning
- set yourself an exercise schedule (maybe lifting weights when the kids are in bed, then cardio at another time in the day).
- pre-pack your lunches to take to work with you
- keep a food diary so you become accountable for what you are eating
- try to include your children in your exercise eg. I push one in the pram and the other rides his bike or jogs next to me.
- cut one naughty thing out of your diet each week, not all at once. Eg. cut out soda one week, sugar the next, white bread (just examples, not sure what you already have in your diet).
- read as much as you can. Go to your library and find books on detoxing, health, recipes. Immerse yourself in what you are trying to achieve.

Be kind to yourself. Understand that this will not happen in a few weeks or months. You may have to dedicate a year or more to this. But have a date somewhere in your mind, and clearly tell yourself that you will reach that date, and when you do you will be the person you want to be.

A close friend of mine gained 88 lbs (40 kgs) when she was pregnant. She has lost it all. It took her two years, but she looks absolutely incredible. I'm really proud of her. You can do it too!!!

Good luck!
 
Yeah, getting motivation isn't motivating

Hi AriesQ4...I'm just like you...living in "Cold A$$ed" NY state where you become a hermit all winter. I have 100 pounds to lose too and I stated a new life about 1 month ago. All I did was decide that enough was enough with the excuses and feeling horrible when it came time to get dressed everyday. I started by eating oatmeal everyday for breakfast(the cardboard tube kind) made with skim milk and a couple of TBSP of brown sugar cut with splenda (sometimes dried blueberries). This makes it impossible to be hungry before lunch. I also got a water bottle that goes with me everywhere and I fill it with a little "real lemon" (sold in juice isle) and a sweet and low... sometimes I just have plain water in there too...it's just my own version of zero calorie flavored water without caffine and it's cheap! Anyway, when my son goes down for his naps I go to the basement and walk on my treadmill. I pick a movie to watch to take my mind off walking and just pause it when I've "done my time"...if it's a movie I like it becomes my motivation to get back down there to walk. What I've done to improve is that I just add .1 to the speed when I feel like I can go faster...then I start at the new number the next time I go down there. I don't do the preprogrammed stuff on the machines because it makes me less likely to finish. I've also cut out butter, most sugar, bread etc...I've been buying the weight watchers wheat pitas for sanwiches and we no longer have potatoes with dinner...just fish or chicken with a veggie or salad. I do not eat sweets becasue it just makes me want more and more and more...it's like a slippery slope. Anyway, to indulge I have a tea cup of frozen fruits (cherries, peaches & blueberries) or a chocolate and oats fiberone bar. I've found that if you eat correctly and drink your water you end up being hungry when it's appropriate and you don't binge. Plus if you exercise it makes you feel guilty about putting things in your mouth becasue why bust your butt just to binge? Anyway, just think of it like this...is it worth the 3 minutes of enjoyment to eat chocolate (that makes you fat)...or will you be happier when you are healthy/thinner and can fit into anything and maybe turn some heads (including your own)...if you wanna email each other for motivation let me know...
 
You have to "prepare" yourself for one very simple reason - you do not want to diet, you do not like dieting, who does...

The thing is, do not think about it as of dieting. Just try to correct your daily routines bit by bit, until they become your new lifestyle.

As was mentioned above, prepare your meals, plan and schedule them.

Eat when you are hungry, not when you got nothing more to do. Drink more - you will feel less hungry. Make this a rule - whenever hungry, get a glass full of water. When I was working all day by the computer, I used to drink ALL THE TIME. I mean, every 2-3 minutes. This helped me a lot! I was not so hungry!

You can also drink grean tea - it helps.

Eat smaller portions, but more often.

Do not think of dieting as of something you hate - just "rename" it!! Start bit by bit and you will do that!
 
I have refused to say "Diet" .. this time I finally understand what people meant when they said "Life Change" , it's true, if I said Diet in the past, I'd feel hungry before the word was out of my mouth. I started out very slowly, I didn't eat between meals, and cut out evening snacking. I didn't tackle anything else at first, once I felt comfy doing those things, I cut back on my diet soft drink, and took up walking a couple of days a week. Now I'm on track and motivated! I'm down 37lbs in less than 3 months! Every choice has a concequence, and Every choice matters. It is hard but it is possible. I wish you the best of luck!
 
AriesQ4 said:
I have about a 100lbs to lose and the whole task just seems so daunting.
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I started wanting to lose 122 pounds (scary number, right?) So I decided to break it down for myself. If you look at the total picture, you might psych yourself right out of something you have every capability of doing. I looked at it as, I want to lose 10 pounds. When I hit that 10 pounds, I'll think about the next 10. Thinking of 122 pounds was overwhelming, and by breaking it down to more manageable goals for myself, it has made it much easier. Just a thought :)
 
Try some fat binders and appetite suppressant, those might help ya to lose few lbs at the beginning and then when you ll see it actually works your motivation will be sky hight. :)
 
Its so hard to be motivated.. especially when you have so much to do, with having kids etc.. i think the best thing for me is, looking at pictures of myself and thinking 'The next time someone takes a picture of me, i want to have NO double chin' ..
Also, i couldnt be bothered going to the gym, so i brought a small home-gym from ebay! Therefore if its here staring me in the face, i cant ignore it!

Good luck!
 
Also, i couldnt be bothered going to the gym, so i brought a small home-gym from ebay! Therefore if its here staring me in the face, i cant ignore it!
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First mistake u are making already , you are not willing to do any big lifestyle change but you wanna lose weight. :)

Home gyms are good as well but usually are not as effective as going to gym, firstly in gym you will meet many new people, which definitely will give you extra motivation to work out more and harder,to change your diet etc. That i can tell from my own experience.
 
I have the same problem with my appetite. I can't seem to feel full no matter how much I eat. Plus building up the motivation to bring myself to go to the gym takes longer than I actually stay there...lol. A friend recommended a certain pill called Liproxenol to help me lose weight. 'Worked well with the appetite suppression. I just hope that there is a pill too that can make me stay longer at the gym...lol.
 
I have been there and am sort of still there. I have lost 150lbs over the last 3 yrs and I still have a bit to go. My relationship with food is crap lol. I have always associated it with getting fat. I have recently started a 90 day challenge which is helpng me to really get over my fear of food. Honestly I think thats the hardest part. I think motivation for the gym comes from getting started and maybe getting a bit more confident. The program Im on makes it possible to lose some weight get motivated and continue with both the gym and the nutrition.
 
Always keep in mind that a healthy mind resides in a healthy body. If you are so fat then you will become lazy and you will not perform your work efficiently. So be motivated be healthy and be fit.
 
I find the best way is to not think too much about exercise, just plan and go for it. If I think too much before I put on the workout shoes I can find an excuse. Just drive to the gym or get some workout clothes on and before you know it the work out will be over. Music motivates me, make a playlist or find a workout video you like or even just walk around the mall or a museum. Also if you join a gym with fitness classes I find that they will help. If you feel self concious about being at a gym, just imagine how it will feel when you start getting results. Also places like the ymca have baby sitters there and options for various incomes.
 
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