If you want the rainbow, you've got to put up with the rain

Thanks Mal :)

He is definately the most adventurous kitten everrrr. the minute i got him, he wouldn't stay in one room like the shelter advised. He immediately started running around chasing Mau and the bunny! :)
 
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He's soo cute :)

Ok, I am going hiking again today, as it is my day off :) It's going to be hot though. Ickyyy... hehe

Ohhh, bonus. Got to see the kitty and some hot Britness!

:p

You look great and the little guy resembles my Bob.
 
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Just something I am pondering today...
 
Wise words, Brit. That's the old Brit I love to hear from. :)

Sort of reminds me of what MJ is saying in the video in my sig.
 
Good Morning Sunshines! :)

I just wanted to check in. I weighed in today and I have lost more weight. A total of 17 lbs!!!! Yeaaaa

Also, I had to go shopping yesterday because my work clothes are too big and I am a size down :D

And.... i am using Mal's trick and I also got an outfit that is a size smaller so I can have something to look forward to when I get to the next size. I dont think that will be long from now because even the clothes I bought are pretty loose, but I just wasn't quite to the next size after that.

:D
 
Awesome news Brit! Keep up the forward momentum and positive attitude... it's refreshing. :)
 
yeeeeah baby :)

that's awesome news britta. i'm so proud of you. how you've been lately? i missed talking to you. how's life and work?
 
omg Lennaaaaaaaaaaa
yayyy! I was thinking about you soooo much this week! :) I hope you are fantastic. I have missed you sooo much.

well... things are better. No more icky Dave! hehe, its so amazing how I can see how much he pulled me down.
But things in the guy department are never easy, hehe... I'm seeing a guy now and its soooooo confusing, idk its a loooonggggg story but im head over heels for him, but not sure if I can put 100% into it right now- but he doesn't want to let go and i dont either so its just kinda tugging on my heart all the time.

Work is good. I am starting to manage my department and stuff, so its a little hectic at times, and the ppl that come in are absolutely 100% WACKO, but hey, at least it's not dull.

:) It's great to see your face!!!! Hugs :)
 
No more icky Dave! hehe, its so amazing how I can see how much he pulled me down.
they say hindsight is 20/20 -isn't it really amazing how much clarity you get when there's some distance... good for you for realizing the effect he had on you..


But things in the guy department are never easy, hehe...
that's part of their charm... and they'd say the same thing about women :)


I'm seeing a guy now and its soooooo confusing, idk its a loooonggggg story but im head over heels for him, but not sure if I can put 100% into it right now- but he doesn't want to let go and i dont either so its just kinda tugging on my heart all the time.
just be honest with your feelings and have some fun... if it's not working for you though -remember that being by yourself for a while, doesn't mean that you're alone or have to be lonely... any guy is never better than no guy.... you deserve someone who you can and want to give it 100 percent and will give it back to you... but temporary fun is also good :)


Work is good. I am starting to manage my department and stuff, so its a little hectic at times, and the ppl that come in are absolutely 100% WACKO, but hey, at least it's not dull.
working with the public is always good for entertainment :) that's awesome that you're getting to manage your department -those skills will take you far in whatever line of work you end up in
 
Thanks Mal :) Ya he is definately someone who i want to put 100% into, but i promised myself that i would learn to love myself before i get really involved with anyone.
It's kinda hard since i have feelings for him and stuff, we have been doing this for a few months now and it's been up and down... at first he would get irritated at the situation like every few days and tell me he couldn't do it...then he would come back and say he doesn't want to not have me in his life... the whole time i told him he could just walk away from it at any time, but i wont be ready until i am ready... i kinda of am just happy that hes in my life and there are no labels, it just is what it is. Right now its been a little more distant, and its been bugging me for the past couple of days because I want to talk to him all the time and i just naturally focus on him so i consciously have to make an effort to put myself first.
lol... as for the public... here's an example:

I was opening a new membership yesterday for a guy, and the lady who is his beneficiary was sitting next to him. she is staring at me the whole time, and suddenly blurts out 'your eyes are so alluring, they are just pulling me in!'
rofl i didn't know what to say so i just smiled and continued along, and then later we were ordering checks or something and she blurts out 'how much does it cost to get your chin and upper lip waxed?'

omggggggg i was like "I DONT KNOW" and the guy she was with was like "Like she would know any of that, she works at the bank. come on... you do banking at the bank' and they were both dead serious the whole time and i was like busting up laughing inside i had no idea what to say

I mean...do i look like the bearded lady or something? rofllll i think it's like $20 to have my eyebrows done...but i haven't needed my beard or mustache waxed yet.
I swear, i work with people like this everyday. There are no normal people who come into my work. :)

Oh, but anyways, i forgot to mention earlier, I am getting a lot of feedback about losing weight and people are commenting on it and saying they can see it in my face, and stuff. The part i have noticed is that my collar bones are more visible. I think collar bones are sexy on women, so i am happy about that :)
 
hehehe funny about the woman and waxing. i so know what you mean. i have students' parents like that all the time, asking awkward questions.

i am so glad that icky dave is OUT!!! yaaay! mal is right sometimes you get a great perspective when you distance yourself from something. when me and goran broke up year and a half ago we both realized that there are plenty fish in the sea but that we are what we both want. so now we're planning on moving in together somewhere in november (i need to settle my debts first).

i am so glad things are working out for you, especially in the weight loss part. it gives me motivation and some sort of security that it will happen for me too. i happened once, it will happen again :)

you just keep on smiling :) it is so nice to see your face too :)

hugs
Lena
 
Good Morning :)

well last night I had a binge. I was craving sweets all day and at like 9pm i gave in... but ill be ok, it's happened before and it's not the end of the world.

I think something is wrong with me. I have been extremely tired for the past couple of weeks, and for the past few days I have not been able to do anything but sleep. Even after I wake up, I just want to sleep more. I haven't been depressed, although I feel like I may be as of yesterday(I'll explain later), and I have been getting outside a lot, eating well... and prior to sleeping all the time, my sleeping patterns were quite healthy. I try to stay awake so I dont sleep more than 8 hours because I know that sleeping a lot makes you more tired... but i just feel so sluggish.

Also, I have had a terrible headache since yesterday, my skin hurts(a sign of me getting sick) and I have felt very hot, even though it hasn't been more than 70 degrees since I started feeling this way.

It's so weird because I would have thought all of these symptoms would lead to something but I have not gotten a flu, or cold, or anything... ughhhhhhhhhhhh

Oh, for the depressed part... men. ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

So... I told this guy that I can't see him for a while because I am too attached to him to focus on me, and I really need to shift that focus... well he lives like an hour away and on Friday night he calls me at like 3 am and says he drove up here to see me, and he wanted my adress and stuff(hasn't been to my apt yet lol) and i was half asleep and i didn't think he would actually drive up here in the middle of the night without telling me, or asking for that matter, so I didn't tell him where I was or anything and he got pissed and got off the phone and then started texting me that I am really mean. so I just said 'this is not a fair fight, i am half asleep.' and he kept on with it so i just said 'stop' and then put my phone on silent. Then he calls like 30 mins later and i had no idea so i got another text the next morning that says 'whatever' and he texted me 'good morning' and called around 11 and i was hiking so i didn't get it until around 2 when i called back... but like.... who does this? I am not even sure where to go with this now.
The guy is 27 and he's acting very immature. I still haven't talked to him, and honestly, i dont really want to. It's been soooooo long since I have dated someone without being in a serious relationship with them, and i put up ith so much from dave, i am just not sure I know what my limits are anymore, but he is really pushing me

and now this has become the dating 101 forum, lol

so yah, i am starting to feel depressed. This is exactly why i didn't want to get serious with him until i am ready, because I take everything out on myself instead of being rational. It seems clear to me what I need to do. Honestly, I have tried to break it off before. My friend pointed out last night that this guy is always playing the victim. I totally see that now. Also, he is totally insensitive to the stuff I am working through and is pushing me to be ready.

So there it is..... and I think I will be sad about ending things with this guy, but I need to watch myself and not let myself fall into the black abyss again. I will be ok. :)
 
Sorry Brit.

First though, I really think you need to forget this guy. I know you said you're really into him but from my experience with you... I think you look to anyone, have it be your ex b/f or this new guy or even the next "new guy" to fill a void in your life.

It can't be like that.

It's not fair to you and it's not fair to him.

You want a guy because there's a true connection and he's exactly what you're looking for. Not to temporarily fill some void. When you do this, it's just like a starvation diet... a temporary solution to a permanent problem that usually leads to more frustration to anything else.
 
steve's very wise...

don't be afraid of flying solo -it doesn't mean being alone... and someone isn't better that no one..

hang in there missy... one day at a time...
 
youre right.
I talked to my old best friend last night and i told him everything and he said he was amazed that i still sell myself short when it comes to guys. like... honestly i dont know any other guys! If i kick them all to the curb i will have 0 people within close proximity in my life. But maybe that's what i need for now. Maybe it's exactly what i need, and when the time is right, the right people will come into my life?

Like... where was this lesson when I was younger? How did I miss it? Who was supposed to teach me that I dont have to put up with crap from people? Because I feel like I do have to, i owe it to them to stick around. SO basically everything I believe is wrong, and i am starting over...

and I am not able to nourish myself in the way i need to be because i am so F****** messed up right now i can't even focus. ughhhhh i dont want to fall again

sorry for the long emotional rant, i just needed to get it out
 
youre right.
I talked to my old best friend last night and i told him everything and he said he was amazed that i still sell myself short when it comes to guys. like... honestly i dont know any other guys! If i kick them all to the curb i will have 0 people within close proximity in my life. But maybe that's what i need for now. Maybe it's exactly what i need, and when the time is right, the right people will come into my life?

Ding ding ding

Confidence in yourself and joy for life begets more joy in general.

You don't need anyone right now, especially guys. You need to find yourself. You need to repair yourself. You need to be whole before you can devote yourself to someone.

I know this seems strange coming from a married guy... but you don't need a significant other in your life to be happy. I know you know this, Brit. You need to be happy and then, when the right guy comes along, he'll add to said happiness.

Without that happiness thing though... it's a dark road with or without a guy. A guy, as I said above, might acutely brighten the darkness... but that's short lived as you've found to be the case.
 
but you don't need a significant other in your life to be happy. I know you know this, Brit. You need to be happy and then, when the right guy comes along, he'll add to said happiness

beautifully put by the anniversary boy :)
 
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