Holding myself accountable

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NicholeB

NicholeB

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Its January 29, 2017. I've started my diet yet again. But things feel differently this time. Things ARE different. I can feel a change in myself internally.
  • I accept that I will have "bad meals" but I do not accept having bad days. Because I am holding myself accountable now. One meal doesn't ruin the other meals. I will stay on course and understand that.
  • I accept that I will eat too many calories/carbs sometimes, but I do not accept gorging myself simply because I did. Because I am holding myself accountable now! Eating seven Oreos just because I had 10 extra berries? Not happening! Not anymore.
  • I accept that I will be angry at the scales sometimes, but that doesn't mean I will take a day off. Because I am holding myself accountable now. Progress is progress, even if its not reflected on my digital scale.
  • I accept that when my friends invite me for dinner, I will be worried but I will not cancel because this is real life. This is how it is. I have friends. I will order my salad. I will drink my water. I will smile and nod and enjoy the moment instead of worrying that someone at the next table is making fun of the fat girl that ordered a salad and water. I am fat. And I like salads. Big deal. Besides, I am holding myself accountable now. They can eat all the mashed potatoes they want.
  • I accept that I hate exercising, but I do not accept not doing it. Because I can do it. I should do it. And the only reason I hate exercising is because I am overweight. If its hard to run, then run more. It will get easier and after all, I have to hold myself accountable now.

This will be my daily diary with daily meal plans, exercises and weigh-ins.

So far, I have been dieting for 4 days. I weighed in at 261 on day 1. By the end of day 1, I had already broken down and ate half a pack of zesta crackers.. lol! Damnit.. I felt pathetic and drank a bottle of water and went to sleep. Woke up to a 1 pound weight loss, despite my efforts to sabotage myself. So I carried on- but this time with great determination and no cheats. I am down 6.5 pounds total, and will continue pushing on- HARD. It is time to change my life, my health, my image and my example for my children. It is time to be me. I hope this serves to encourage others as well. We could all use support during these times. Thank you for reading.

-Nichole
 
Hi, Nichole & welcome to the forum. Starting a diary is a great incentive to do better. We are accountable for what we weigh & what we do with our lives. I wish you all the best, cheers, Cate
 
cate said:
Hi, Nichole & welcome to the forum. Starting a diary is a great incentive to do better. We are accountable for what we weigh & what we do with our lives. I wish you all the best, cheers, Cate
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Thank you for the warm welcome, cate!
 
Hi nichole i love your intro. There are always going to b those days. Holidays or birthdays or just going out seem to get in the way of your new eating or exercise plan. Its hard for me to remember that there's always tomorrow when i screw up. For example you had some crackers. Thats better than eating a whole cheesecake. In the grand scale of it all crackers arent so bad. Just take the good days with the bad and dont give up on yourself. I've been giving up on myself my whole life and it got me nowhere but further in the hole.
Sometimes crackers are only crackers ;)
 
Rebel lee said:
Hi nichole i love your intro. There are always going to b those days. Holidays or birthdays or just going out seem to get in the way of your new eating or exercise plan. Its hard for me to remember that there's always tomorrow when i screw up. For example you had some crackers. Thats better than eating a whole cheesecake. In the grand scale of it all crackers arent so bad. Just take the good days with the bad and dont give up on yourself. I've been giving up on myself my whole life and it got me nowhere but further in the hole.
Sometimes crackers are only crackers ;)
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Thank you for the encouraging words, Rebel! And the friendly reminder to be easy on myself when I'm struggling. You are right, sometimes crackers are only crackers. But usually for me, crackers means peanut butter or cheese wih them, which means a pepsi, which means I screwed up my whole day so I may as well have a bag of chips. Haha. At least now I recognize how unhealthy that is and I am determined to change it. I woke up this morning to another one pound loss. I will take it! :)
 
Well done Nichole. Crackers are only crackers hon, no matter what we put on them. Try to get over the now I've ruined my day I may as well keep stuffing my face mentality. We have all done it. We learn as we go (& still make more mistakes), but snacking on something in moderation is not a biggie. It's the learning to stop. Go you!
 
cate said:
Well done Nichole. Crackers are only crackers hon, no matter what we put on them. Try to get over the now I've ruined my day I may as well keep stuffing my face mentality. We have all done it. We learn as we go (& still make more mistakes), but snacking on something in moderation is not a biggie. It's the learning to stop. Go you!
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Exactly how I am feeling these days. I can forgive myself for my slip ups without feeling devestated and giving up. This will be the 3rd time I have had to lose over 70 pounds. My weight varies between 160 and 260 year by year. Very frustrating! To float 100 pounds up and down. I would like to get back to my 160 lb range and enjoy my life again- but forever this time! Thank you for the encouragement, cate!
 
Nichole as you look at other diaries you will c we all slip up sometimes. It hard to eat as perfect as we want when we go out with friends or family and they can or do eat anything they want. Temptation is all around us. The mass produced food manufacturers c to it.
In my case im a sugar junkie. It was hard just to walk away from sugar completly. Every where i go people are eating these amazing looking sweet concoctions and sugar treats are in just about every commercial. So dont think your alone. Most of us have that one not so good for us food that calls to us. Mistakes or setbacks are going to happen. I think the best alot of us can do is to just strive for a balance. If you have a bad day; insist that a great day follows it. Giving up simply isnt an option ;)

Rebel
 
Good job on the loss, and keep up the great work! It's so easy to slip and use that slippage as an excuse to binge, isn't it? One of my undeveloped habits is to just stop.
 
Thanks Rebel Lee!! :)

Little John said:
Good job on the loss, and keep up the great work! It's so easy to slip and use that slippage as an excuse to binge, isn't it? One of my undeveloped habits is to just stop.
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Little John, so true. I've done it for 10 years. :beathorse:

Thanks for the support!!

I'm down another half pound. I'm assuming this is the part where the weightloss slows down because I'm drained of every extra ounce of waterweight I was holding, lol. Here we goooooo..... View attachment 24314
 
NicholeB said:
I'm down another half pound. I'm assuming this is the part where the weightloss slows down because I'm drained of every extra ounce of waterweight I was holding, lol. Here we goooooo.....
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Not necessarily. This could be the start of a long steady progress downwards. You can do this Nichole!
 
Hi nichole ! You sound up beat and positive about your weight loss journey this time around and that will be such a helpful tool I am sure . I just wanted to say thank you because I happened to read your first entry the other night and then the next day I fell off the wagon and started eating oreos and as a ate my 4th one I remembered you saying that just because you screw up and eat a few doesn't mean all is lost and you can continue to eat the whole bag . It helped me and I closed the bag and put them away .....high up in the pantry where I would need a chair to reach them again lol. So thank you and you are doing awesome !
 
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