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windmill

New member
Hi there,

I realize now with my birthday coming up in May i have been uphappy with my weight half my life. Also, i have been losing and gaining the same 30 lbs for about 7 years. I AM SO SICK OF IT.

I have tried writing diaries before but i have not been consistent... so I am going to try doing it this time and see if it helps.

Stats:
5' 4'' female, small to average frame
25 yrs old
Highest weight: 177 (although havent been this in a couple years)
Current weight: 160
Goal Weight: 120ish (see how feel once get closer)

I do not eat fast food or fried food and I am a vegetarian, but i know i should eat more vegetables and less carbs (bread is my weakness). I have been going to the gym again ( i took 9 months off). My goal is to go 5 plus times per week for about an hour (including stretching).

I dont want to rush through this and gain all the weight back later ( its happened before) but i also dont want to spend another summer like this ahhh. so hopefully this time i can go at a good steady pace instead of plateauing.

I have a lot going on in my life right now and i really want to try and make sure i turn to exercise instead of food in times of stress. Any suggestions on not stress eating, or workouts, or anything else would be appreciated :)

today i ate too much so will be officially starting the food aspect tomorrow ha.

Also just a question, do you find that as you lose weight your social life improves or not? I feel like my lack of confidence stemming from this extra weight is really holding me back, just wondering how other people feel.
 
There's probably two good ways to avoid stress eating: stay busy, and if that doesn't work eat something small without a whole lot of calories (like a pickle or celery stick or something). The pickle is my go to "I shouldn't eat something, but I have to" food.

As for the social life aspect, mine's actually gotten a little worse but I was in a much different situation (I'm still heavier than you by BMI by a large amount). Back when I weighed so much, I got drunk and basically said aloud whatever stupid/funny thought came into my head. Why? Because there were no stakes, it really didn't matter as there was no one to impress. Now that I'm starting to approach a more normal weight, I drink less to avoid the calories and tend to stay pretty quiet to try and not humiliate myself. I guess there's a downside to everything. You'll probably be different though.
 
I socialise in a totally different much healthier way.

Back when I was big - every social event I ever did involved taking in a lot of calories... I used to go out for meals which were a lot of calories and I used to drink high calories too... Not always drinking alcohol - but it was high calories... During the daytime we would stop on a hot day and have a milkshake and ice-cream sundae... LOL we even made friends that owned restaurants, bars and cafes and would combining having calories with seeing friends...

Now - even if we call in to see friends who have restaurants we have something light or water / diet coke...

We still occasionally eat out with friends - but it is much less often...

Nowadays we dance a lot... We have made a group of friends who dance a lot too... We salsa a lot and the same people zumba a lot... We see the same people and the same teacher virtually every day... Whenever we do - we do a heap of exercise and we just drink water... Everyone just wants to drink water to quench their thirst (lol on salsa nights the water sales are through the roof and alcohol sales are negligible - people see the lively dancing and imagine that we drink alcohol - but if you are spinning around a lot when you dance it really helps your balance if you stay sober)... We actually feel like we have an amazing social life and our exercise levels are really high...
Last week for instance - this was what we did (with the same other dancers):
Sat - 1 hr zumba, semba class as part of a salsa night - we were dancing from 8pm until after midnight... (we also did a 1hr private salsa lesson in the morning with the teacher working on our routine)... Lol at the salsa night we even threw in a few zumba routines...
Sun - rest day
Mon - 1 hr zumba
Tues - 3 salsa classes
Wed - 1 hr zumba
Thur - 2 salsa classes
Fri - rest day (we had tickets for the theatre and had to tell everyone we wouldnt be at zumba)

Frankly - we could do more with the same crowd... We know where a lot of them do salsa later on Friday - but do not tend to go there as we do like to do other things too...

So - yes our social life has definitely improved - but making new more active friends (by taking up a hobby which can count as exercise) was central in that...
 
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Hi,

Thanks for the responses MrVee & Omega!

MrVee- thats a good suggestion for not eating under stress. also thats interesting that you felt more uninhibited before you lost weight.

Omega- thats great you were able to get so involved in a new hobby! i am trying to do that right now too. the only problem is its such a time investment! but i do think its worth it.

Today was an okay day i guess. I didnt eat a huge amount but i did eat past when i felt full and i am trying not to do that anymore.
I am soooo tired which might be part of it, i have not been sleeping well.

Food:
large bagel
a lot of rice, beans, and guacamole
juice
grapes

Exercise: 45 minutes

Not sure why but when i exercise my heart rate goes up pretty high. I am usually around 185ish for the whole time. My resting heartrate is about 55 though so i think its okay? I started doing some strength exercises, I am seeing a slight improvement in my ability to do push ups which is nice.

Tomorrow i am going to try and eat more vegetables. I think i am going to weigh in on friday, i am realllly hoping for 158.5! I am so looking forward to the summer and going to the beach, i just hope i can get fitter in the next couple months.

hope everyone else is doing well!
 
ugh i think i ate too much for dinner. I had pasta and broccoli (but mostly pasta) and a little bit of fried rice. I never really have counted calories, just roughly estimated them, but maybe i should start? it just seems like such a hassle though.
 
It has been an eventful couple of weeks. I binged a couple of times but as of right now i am back on the wagon! I worked out today for an hour and am going tomorrow morning. i really need to start eating more vegetables...i need to get some new recipe ideas. I think May will be a good month!
 
based on age and your resting HR, 181 is your 90% of max mark, above that is known as red line training. how long are you holding your HR in the red zone ? most fit athletes can only hold at that level for a few minutes.
 
I went to a zumba class today it was really fun! And i ate beans, rice, avocado, and lettuce for lunch so i am feeling pretty healthy :)


Hi Trusylver,

My heart rate is usually between 180-188 for about 40 minutes when i go on the elliptical. Its not like i feel sick or that i am working too hard though, not sure why it is so high.
 
I did zumba today too (lol and salsa)... I'm pleased that you enjoyed... Maybe you see how I found it so addictive. Anything that makes solid exercise feel like that much fun has to be good!!!
 
Haha, yeah i know it was really fun. i think i will go back next week.

So today i think was okay food wise. I am trying to not eat as many carbs. I did eat a bagel though, as well as some beans and rice. oh and i had cereal too. I am having trouble breaking under 160... i did see 159 yesterday though! but today i was back up a pound. i know i shouldn't weight in every day because there can be so much fluctuation but i couldnt resist!

I am starting to do some weight training (just a few minutes a day, i dont know that much about it) but i am alrady seeing some results! So i am really happy about that. ALso i saw some of my friends from the gym that i havent seen a while since i stopped going, and that was really fun :)

However, I was just thinking today how far i have to go (40 lbs) and it was so daunting. Also there is this one guy i kind of like but i dont think anything would ever happen when i am at this weight, if only because i have 0% confidence. I feel like i have let my weight affect so much of my life! I dont know why i keep circling back to it and trying to lose it, its been a decade, why can i just not get rid of it ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

hopefully i will be in a better frame of mind tomorrow. hope everyone else is doing well
 
Hi Windmill! welcome :), carbs are my weakness too, especially bread and pasta mmm yum, im definately a big savoury person but I have found cutting a whole heap out has made a huge difference to my weight loss etc.
Its pretty daunting when you think about how much you have to loose at times but if you try and take it in incriments like say your first goal is to loose 10 pounds or so and then 20 etc iv found makes it a bit more manageable, and the way this year is flying by im sure you will get there quicker than you think.
stay positive and surround your self with positive people and you can do it!!
Wishing you all the best :)
 
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