Hey Suzy,
I'm new here too....but I'm active on the sister forum so this is all sorta familiar to me. I'd like to offer you some thoughts & advice, at least stuff that has worked for me.
I'm 43 and in the course of my overweight years, I feel confident stating that I've been exposed to a fair amount of diets, fads, concepts and methods of losing weight. Heck, we all have. The thing is, I've yet to meet a fat person who said "OMG, you mean this piece of pizza has more calories then this stalk of celery?".....
The thing is, we live in 2008 (soon to be 2009) but our bodies are derived from thousands of years of evolution, for survival purposes we couldn't have known a day would come where we had food widely available to us 24/7 AND a lifestyle that negated our need to hunt & gather (expend energy) to get it. Unless you're considering a trip to the 7-11 for a bag of Doritos exercise
So you're like many of us; you can't shovel heap-loads of food down your throat and get away with it....and I'll let you in on a little secret, as we age we generally lose lean muscle-mass and our caloric needs decline. yet we continue to honor & endulge each meal as yet another opportunity to dazzle our taste buds. In other words, it only get tougher and I've seen lots of skinny people from High School turn fatty, only a very small handful of people escape The Widening.
So here's the thing...we can talk about diet plans, food, calories, exercise, cardio, weight-training and all that good stuff...but I firmly believe that in order to succeed, it really starts on a mental page. Much like an alcoholic has to "hit their bottom" I too believe us "thin-challenged" folks need to reconsile with ourselves in a similar manner. I work from absolutes and in my opinion there is no reason to exert effort & energy into doing something and then go and ruin it. This can't be "yet another diet effort"....it has to be more of a lifestyle change, something permanent.
And since I'm going novel-length, let me address that. It's not just a "lifestyle change"...everyone likes to say that because it became popular some many years ago. I don't buy it. See, here's the bad news:
You're about to endure an extended period of calorie deficit to accomplish your goals. This isn't like taking a course of antibiotics for 2 weeks and then back to normal. No. You need to eat LESS then your body needs and force your body to resort to it's fat storage: only through calorie deficit will you lose fat. If you burn 700 calories on the treadmill and then eat-back 800 calories cause you feel righteous....you basically go nowhere. "You shouldn't feel hungry on a diet"....yeah, uhhh....BULLSHIT. Your body is used to eating big-calories and after the first couple weeks of gung-ho enthusiasm start to fade against the backset of tasty foods, you'll be hammered by a body that perceives itself as starving. Accordingly, I suggest it's two-fold: a "diet lifestyle" for the weight-loss period (probably about a year) and then a "maintenance lifestyle".....BUT not to rock the boat too much, yes: it's an overall health & fitness lifestyle. I just want you to understand and commit yourself to the whole process....but understand it's not a life-sentence, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and you won't always have to skip on having a desert or cutting-loose on occassion. I like to focus on the objective and hit it hard.
So the point is, you really need to ask yourself if this is the time in your life where you're ready to go all the way. There's no point to doing this for 3 months and then quitting; you may as well just not bother. For me, it took the doctors telling me I needed to go on blood-pressure and cholesterol meds for the rest of my life. I figured it was that or hopefully surviving a heart-attack and then getting serious. I think, for most of us, it takes an event or dramatic set of circumtances to make the change. I'd suggest thinking of this as swimming across a lake...once you're out there, there's no quitting...and dare I say, if you're not willing to make that committment then you may not be ready to pull this off. Others have done it, thousands have done it: you can do this too! You can be the one with the success story!
Now for the good news!
WHEN you succeed, you will absolutely agree that it was one of the best decisions you've ever made in your life...you're only regret is that you didn't do it sooner.
Also, it will get easier and easier as time goes by. Your addiction to sugar and a food-gratifying lifestyle will become collectively easier to push away from. You'll start seeing results and getting positive feedback. Smaller sized clothing, new wardrobe and all the other fun that comes with the pride of fitness. Most importantly, your bloodwork will dramatically improve, you should be healthier and your life expentancy will lengthen.
Visualize what you want to achieve and obsess with your game plan. It's your right, it's your destiny and you can do it and you will love yourself for the results for all the right (and some of the wrong
) reasons. But I do believe it all starts with a mental and emotional mindset.
The longest journey begins with one small step.....
Hi there! And welcome to your (undorky) journal! I hope that you receive the encouragement you are looking for, and that you will also take advantage of some of the excellent advice offered on this forum. In particular I have benefited from Steve, Wishes, and Omega. 
