Floater's diary

I managed to find out how to get the pensioner's discount at the swimming hall and feel positive that I'll go today. I decided to walk there and back by myself (2,4 km in each direction), as it adds more fat burn cardio on top of the swimming. I'll have to remember to pack a hat for the way back home so I don't get a muscle spasm from walking in the cold weather with wet hair! I don't feel super good about taking this body to be seen by others in a swim suit, but I have to turn that thought around and remember that every single workout is another step towards transitioning.

Breakfast was bean and spinach stew with pasta and creme fraiche. I took a long effect ADHD med and am soaking peas for oea soup in the evening. I'll have congee with two eggs, shiitake and sprouts before going swimming to make sure I'm fueled and hydrated for the swim - when I go swimming, I tend to go hard at it, and I don't want to get too sore or depleted!
 
Nothing makes me as hungry as swimming! Being prepared is an absolute necessity.
 
What a nice coincidence - my landlord sent me a note that I have paid 22 e too much rent, and I found a hair salon that has that pricing for machine cuts, so I can get my undercut game on fleek again! I booked an appointment on 5.11.. If the salon seems like a nice place, I can start saving up for a color removal; I feel like going back to my natural blonde at some point. (Although I also kind of dream about having my natural color other than a single black streak running in the middle of my head, like a zebra's mane, but... Can you guys tell I have a pretty eccentric taste lol?)

I just had the congee and packed my swimming gear, and filled my thermos with a porridge consisting of 2 tbs of oats, 1 heaping tbs of protein powder, 1 ts of matcha, and a heaping ts of fig jam. That should give me the energy to walk back after swimming! Let's hope I'll have a nice time!

I feel really excited about having booked that hairdresser appointment. I have always found it important to look neat and well-groomed even if my style is a bit strange, and when the pandemic hit and I went through the mental health crisis, it's like I haven't been able to enjoy taking care of my looks like I used to. And besides, even if I won't have money to bleach my hair for quite a while now, I can afford 22 euros per month to keep my sides shaved and crisp, and it would also make me go out in public more which is super important for a person with shut-in-tendencies like me.

I'll tell how the swim was when I get back, hungry and shaking, I bet!
 
Jesus Christ the scambots are busy today.

Just came back from swimming! I water jogged 30mins and swam a lap (I was too sore from my last weight lifting workout to swim longer, and water jogging is also pretty intense. I kept up a good pace, too). I'll definitely go again ASAP.

I wonder if 2x weightlifting and 2x water jogging per week would be too much? It feels amazing to have all the excess fluid drain out. Even my face looks slimmer after the water jog o_O And water jogging is a great way to get into "the zone", I didn't even notice the passing of time!

I had the porridge in the locker room (my legs were wobbly!), walked back, now I'll take the dog out and get my pea soup started.
 
I wonder if 2x weightlifting and 2x water jogging per week would be too much?
If you pay attention to not push the intensity too much for the first month or so you should be fine.

I agree that feeling just a little better aboit how you look can make a big difference in your ability to go outside. And I love the feeling of having freshly cut hair!
 
If you pay attention to not push the intensity too much for the first month or so you should be fine.
I'll make sure to not push too hard. Thanks! And of course, if I start to feel like I can't bounce back as I should, I can always cut back on exercising. I'm so lucky to have a gym and a swimming hall so close by; the swimming hall actually also has a gym, but I like the flexibility of 24/7 gym chains too much to quit my membership just yet.

The pea soup is in the oven. I sautéd a shallot and a cubed carrot in sesame oil, added 200g of cubed smoked ham, nutmeg, cinnamon, a star anise, and salt to give the soup a nice warm autumn-y taste, and finally added the soaked, rinsed dry peas and boiling water, The usual recipe says to boil the peas in the soaking water, but I was curious to see if tossing the soaking water and adding in fresh one would make the soup easier on my stomach. Let's hope so! (My gut is so shocked form all the healthy stuff I've been eating that I look 6 months pregnant.) I boiled the soup on the stove without the lid on until the oven had heated to 200 degrees Celsius, then popped the lid on and put the whole thing in the oven. It should be done in 1,5-2 hrs and make two liters of soup, minus some evaporation.
 
I never use that soaking water for any beans and pulses. My stomach can´t handle it. I´ve heard it´s ok if you use a pressure cooker and that´s what my mom does but I haven´t had her old-fashioned pea soup since my gut got better so I can´t really say if it´s true for me. Your soup sounds delicious!
 
@LaMaria it turned out super good! And it's so cheap, too. 2 liters of the stuff cost me 4 euros, spices and oil, onion and meat included in the price!

As a rule of thumb, most pulses and legumes have to have the soaking water discarded because unsoaked they contain toxins that get infused into the soaking water. Nothing that would kill a person, but indigestion and inability to take in nutrients, stuff like that. I think that peas are a rare exception to that rule because they can be eaten raw, but lentils and beans need to be soaked and rinsed before boiling.
 
Oh, water jogging sounded wonderful. Excellent about the refund & booking in for that haircut. I'm looking forward to my next one.
 
The toxins break down with heat iirc but the undigestible carbs don't (unless apparently you cook them at temperatures well above 100°C) and they overfeed some of the gut flora resulting in painful bloating. Same thing with the anti-nutrients. I value my relative lack of gi issues so I throw out all soaking water and rinse canned beans thoroughly.
 
The toxins break down with heat iirc but the undigestible carbs don't (unless apparently you cook them at temperatures well above 100°C) and they overfeed some of the gut flora resulting in painful bloating. Same thing with the anti-nutrients.
Interesting!

I'm on a roll today. Slept poorly, but had a call back from the public dental care, they will send me info on my appointment but I'm now in queue for a clean-up and check. I also sent my diagnostic info to the disability services so I could be transferred to their social workers instead of my current one, who is a nice person but seems to believe that autism is curable and that I won't have any support needs in the future.

I had potatoes and marg for breakfast, and am now eating the last of the bean and spinach thing with potatoes and creme fraiche. I feel like there's a motor running inside me and I really want to go for another water jog. Then I could either rest tomorrow and hit the ygm on Sunday, or the other way round depending on how I'll feel. But we'll see - I also don't want to overdo it and get too sore or exhausted...
 
But other than that: rest up today. It's too easy to get caught up in that upswing and overdo it at first. Ask me how I know...
 
I decided to go to the sauna instead and dry brushed my body, as well as did an acid peeling for my face; I feel very fresh and relaxed now. Dysphoria is always lurking behind the corner, but I can't let it win or I won't reach my transition goals...! (But at the sime time, I will have to accept that it is a real problem and sometimes it will keep me from being on my A-game; if it wasn't so, there would be no need to seek transition after all.)

Having a snack of apple and banana fruit salad with a dollop of creme fraiche, maple syrup, and cinnamon, and a protein shake. The YouTube algorithm presented me with an interesting video about the 2008 rock opera "Repo!" and the rest of the filmography of the guy who created it, as well as how he has abused his position as a cult favorite. A tale way too common. I wouldn't mention this otherwise, but I caught a horrible earworm from one of the clips used in the video essay, and I lowkey fear that once I go on T injections, I'll never be able to give myself a shot without hearing "Zydrate comes in a little glass vial, a little glass vial, a little glass vial" in my head. :sleep: I don't dare to listen to the whole thing because then I'll never be able to forget it :D :D
 
:rotflmao: The soundtrack of my life is a jumble of half-forgotten commercials, catch-phrases, misremembered quotes, and fragments of weird songs.
Glad to hear you chose to do something for your body without overstressing it.
 
Walked to the supermarket to get rotisserie chicken, but it was sold out ;______; I got two chicken skewers instead, they weren't bad but it's just not the same thing. Oh well, I'll hit the gym tomorrow and get chicken legs or rotisserie chicken on my way home!

I'll eat the two remaining pita breads this evening, I'll fill them with pumpkin and some sort of protein amd alfalfa sprouts for a nice crunch. It's nice how hungry exercise is making me!
 
Our bodies really are made for movement. I love rotisserie chicken and it isn´t even that expensive for the amount of meat you can get from a carcass.
 
Tofu is baking in the oven, dog has been walked and fed and medicated, I'm feeling good about myself. I also caved in and listened to that cursed song ("Zydrate Anatomy" from "Repo!", 2008), and oh my god it's stupid, and I would not have any clue what's going on in the song if I hadn't watched the analysis/commentary vid before. But then again, we are speaking of a rock opera where PARIS HILTON played one of the main antagonists, so. Still a total earworm despite the song being pretty bad and creepily sexual for the subject matter (AKA, in a cyberpunk dystopia people need to get organ transplants to treat a mysterious illness, a megacorp loans out organs that it robs right back if the customer can't pay, and an anesthetic called Zydrate is what makes the chop shop market run around; peak stupidity, worse than "Cats" :D ).

The cursed chorus is kind of catchy still, and ironically relevant to my situation:

"Zydrate comes in a little glass vial.
A little glass vial?
A little glass vial.
And the little glass vial goes into the gun like a battery.
Hhh-hhh...
And the zydrate gun goes somewhere against your anatomy.
Hhh-hhh...
And when the gun goes off, it sparks
And you're ready for surgery!
Surgery!"

Why must my brain work like this, ughhh :D

PS: feeling excited about gym and chicken tomorrow... <3
 
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Oh no... Woke up with swollen lymph nodes and a sore throat... Took the dog out, trying to sleep a bit more to see if this will pass :(
 
I hope the extra sleep helps. But even if it does maybe skip the gym today.
 
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