Floater's diary

Aqua jogged for two hours. Had my locker room porridge. Did some clothing maintenance by brushing out my recently washed fake fur coat and putting my winter coat to the wash.

Dinner: a soup I McGyvered out of 5dl of roasted spaghetti squash, garlic, leftover grilled pork from yesterday, tomato paste, spices, and scallions. Also a rye bread with ham because the ham will otherwise go to waste.

Before I´ll go to bed, I´ll have the remaining tofu-chicken-veggie stuff with angel hair pasta.
 
Wasn´t feeling tired, so I decided to make cabbage casserole with 3dl of soy mince, spices, onion, garlic, chopped-up krakow sausage, a splash of pistachio oil, soy sauce, and rice vinegar each, a glob of Scorpion hot sauce, and about 2,5kg of chopped cabbage. I layered the ingredients into my casserole dish in order of appearance above, and hopefully the cabbage will weep enough moisture and the sausages will weep enough fat for the soy mince to absorb. I´ll mix the ingredients together evenly after 1 hour of baking and will decide at that point whether I´ll cover the dish with foil for the other hour of baking or not, depending on how dry the stuff looks.

I´ll have the rest of the chicken-tofu-cauliflower-fennel stuff now, as well as a bowl of cherries. I didn´t feel like having pasta, and if I feel hungry for carbs later, I can have some rice I prepped earlier today.

Going to pack my gym stuff for tomorrow before I start eating. I´ll hoover and wash the floors when I wake up, and change my sheets.
 
I like how you balance the veggie protein and meat in your dishes. I wish I didn't hate the flavor of soy so much!
 
Llama said:
I like how you balance the veggie protein and meat in your dishes. I wish I didn't hate the flavor of soy so much!
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Thanks! I love the taste of soy, tofu, textured soy protein etc as well as most legumes, so I´m lucky in that regard. And combining plant-based and animal proteins is easier on my gut than going full vegetarian/vegan. Considerably cheaper as well!

Some of the cabbage on top was burnt so I picked off most the charred pieces, gave the casserole a proper swirl, and covered with foil. By the time it´s been baking for another hour I´ll check it again and decide if the soy protein needs more liquid added or not. :)
 
Cate said:
Your food sounds so interesting & also delicious & nutritious. Yay you!
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Thanks forum mom! In the future I will hydrate the soy mince first though. Some of it got caramelized (let's call it that as "burnt" to me means inedible) and eating that on a regular basis probably wouldn't be healthy. But I can add in a bit of water to the portions before I nuke them in the microwave to circumvent the issue lol.

Hopefully I'll fall asleep soon...!
 
Judging by the fact that a small bowl of cold, unseasoned rice tastes amazing to me, I must have been really hungry for carbs (as opposed to just craving for carbs) 😆

My next trans clinic appointment is on 23.5 and I really want to be 2-3 kg lighter by then. But too little carbs = insomnia and insomnia makes weight loss harder, so...

I think I'll have a banana for dessert, too.
 
No sleep so might as well take my meds, have a portion of cabbage casserole, and make coffee & start my day... EDIT also having 200g of cottage cheese because my body is screaming for protein
 
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Llama said:
That's 7 weeks away. You need only a 400 kcal/day or so deficit to lose three kg in that time: sounds doable without going hungry!
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Yeah! 🥰 Isn't it 6 weeks though (don't have my calendar)? But still doable and SUSTAINABLE.

Also, I have literally dropped a clothing size when it comes to my upper body, and the chunk in my ass and thighs is muscle. Since December 16th 2022, so much flab has gone that it looks like I've lost more weight than the 8kg or so. Waist looks very different now despite me being gassy from all the healthy stuff I eat lol.

It helps me to know that due to the muscle definition in my upper body, I am way less likely to get into issues at the clinic even if I don't reach the BMI limit. I know of fit trans guys who were over it, but had no issues, because muscle weighs more than fat. And my shoulders on E are broader than a lot of guys' on T 😆

It also helps me that when I still drank and struggled to eat right, I obviously still made good choices that mitigated the damage, and in a way this is such an important realization and takes away so much shame!

Getting up & getting some coffee now and then it's gym & cleanup time 🥰
 
Lunch: angel hair pasta with chopped Brazil nuts, chopped almonds, pistachio oil, soy sauce, garlic, and nutritional yeast. A very beige carb-and-fat-bomb but out of all the stuff I had in the pantry, this is what my little heart desired, so. :D Once I´m done eating I´ll hit the gym.

The stretch marks on my stomach bring my mood down a little bit today. They are almost completely faded to silver by now (only the "tails" of the scars near my pubic bone are still red and angry-looking), but I hate the bumpy/uneven look. Oh well. I guess this is one of the cases where I just need to remind myself that practically everyone has stretch marks, even thin people who were thin for their whole lives. And if the tummy skin never snaps back, maybe I can save for a miniabdominoplasty. I know it sounds like a strange thing to obsess about because top surgery is going to leave me scarred anyway, but those will be scars I chose, whereas my stretch marks are signs from me having battled depression and trauma and that I neglected my body while doing so.

But some days I feel pretty neutral about those stretch marks as well.

EDIT: having one Oreo egg and one M-150 energy drink for dessert before hitting the gym because I still have that "gimme fuel" feeling. The egg is 200kcal and the drink is 100 kcal
 
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Gym was great, had my locker room protein shake, showered, changed my bedsheets and put the laundry machine on, and am now having dinner: cabbage casserole with Parmesan, rye bread with omelette, and a bowl of pineapple for dessert.

EDIT woopsie, I sploshed a huge splash of oil on the pan when frying my omelette. Oh well, I try to not obsess over that. It turned out good and I've cut margarine/butter out of my diet so I'm probably fine. But it's interesting how much such a minor mistake/change in meal plan still made me nervous about gaining instead of losing weight. Need to be mindful in the future.
 
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Last night I didn´t have the pineapple but had some crackers and Parmesan instead.

Breakfast: a banana. Snack: a bowl of pineapple and a handful of shredded chicken breast.

Went to the doctor. She can´t help me with the heredity issue but she took my EDS worries seriously. I´ll have some bloodwork done as well as an asthma test and pulmonary imaging of some sort. And in May I´ll go to her again to see what she can do about referring me tot the genetics clinic. Very happy with the outcome.

Now at home prepping soup with yellow lentils and roasted veggies: onion, garlic, snack lemons, yellow tomatoes, zucchini, and broccoli. I´ll puree everything together with some fresh ginger, turmeric, and green peas for a nice yellowish-green end result, maybe add in some oat cream if I feel like it.
 
Lunch: spring soup (going to call it that because it´s a nice spring green) with shredded chicken, a banana, one Oreo egg (200kcal) and a cup of coffee. Then it´s off to the pool for my aqua jogging sesh.

Feeling happy, calm, and accomplished!
 
Aqua jogged for 120 mins and had my locker room protein shake. Got the Ventoline I was supposed to for my PEF readings next week.

Dinner: cabbage casserole with Parmesan.
 
The cabbage casserole didn´t quite fill me up, so I´ll also have two slices of rye bread with artichoke paste and shredded chicken, and a bowl of mango :)
 
Had a nice walk. Saw a little lizard who had woken up from hibernation!

Bedtime snack: rice and shredded chicken formed into a roll and toasted in a little bit of sesame oil, served with soy sauce and a side of arugula and sauerkraut, and 200g of cottage cheese.
 
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