Emily Rose: The Reboot

I have mixed feelings about the tobacco taxes, in the US poor people smoke more than well off people, so it ends up being a tax that targets the poor.
Yes - taxes that hit the poor at the same time as the wealthy are given tax relief... well, I said I didn't want to talk politics, but... :flame:
On the other hand if it stops some people from smoking that's a good thing. I just am not sure the high prices do stop people from smoking.
It probably does discourage some people, at least, but as well as that the high prices (in Australia they're pretty astronomical as well) probably do discourage schoolchildren from starting the habit - I hope so, anyway.

Hope the cutting down on smoking is going well, Emily, as well as everything else!
 
Yes - taxes that hit the poor at the same time as the wealthy are given tax relief
That is true in the US, one way you see it is cigars vs cigarettes. Cigars are taxed at much lower rates here than cigarettes, and in general cigars are more used by better off people. Not much logic. I had not thought about kids, if the taxes result in fewer kids getting started then I am in favor. I guess this is kind of politics, but not the kind were we are likely to have sharp differences.
 
- Yeah, it was great LaMa.
- Hi Petal, that wasn't 'real' weight loss, it was mostly from alcohol, so that's not good. I haven't weighed in a few days but I feel a little less uncomfortable in my clothes, so that's always good. I was just really bloated there for a few weeks.
- Haha Amy, I actually bumped into a guy I went to school with 16 years ago, and he bought me and my friend the gin. He was only trying to be nice, haha.
- Still haven't stopped Rob. Really struggling.
And discuss anything you want, I really enjoy a debate.

Having a very busy time at the moment. Have moved out, went to the dentist today, my gums are in bad shape. My teeth are good, but she said I should really be worried about bone loss due to the gum disease I have developed, because that is what causes teeth to loosen and fall out. I have warning dreams about this all the time. I know I am not taking proper care of them.

I was actually thinking today that I just get so overwhelmed about all the stuff I'm meant to do - diligently floss and brush every morning and evening, bring a packed lunch to work (to save money and it's healthier), go to the gym (for a fit body and mental health), tidy my room, get my car serviced, have perfect hair, meditate, cook dinner, iron my clothes, clean the toilet, don't let my washing basket get too full, get up on time for work (so I won't be rushing and stressed out), pick up my towel from the bathroom floor after use, limit my screen time, leave house on time to avoid heavy morning traffic, etc etc. I could go on with about a million things, you know yourself. I just find it so overwhelming, and also a bit boring, and I know I make life very hard for myself by not following the 'rules', but does anyone else struggle to find time for everything and still maintain some sort of a fun existence? Or maybe other people enjoy routine more and find all that stuff a lot easier?

I actually think my (former) housemate thrives on washing clothes. I had to come back a few days since I moved out and she has clothes drying everywhere. I would just like to have a little less chaos in my daily routine. Par exemple...

I was literally driving around like a maniac today. I had the worst day in work ever, I just can't cope when I'm too busy, and then I actually take even more smoke breaks and just stare into space, when I simply don't have time. I finally escaped from that hell, had sent a triumphant final email that had covered the main problem of the day, had just breathed a gigantic sigh of relief, and then someone came over to my desk and said it needed to be changed. I curtly responded that I had an appointment so I couldn't stay. Tomorrow's problem. (Story of my life.)

I then raced off to the dentist (encounter described above), leaving the office 10 minutes too late, so at 4.30pm (time of appointment), I had to ring and say that I was still 20 minutes away. The woman said to phone back in 10 minutes and give her an update. I phoned back at 4.40pm (10 minutes away) and she said that she would have to reschedule. I don't know what kind of magic happened between her saying that and my forlorn response of 'Okay', but she changed her mind, and said I could be seen anyway. So I rocked in at 4.50pm. I am a disaster. (And managed to put a dampener on someone else's evening by delaying their appointment by 20 minutes.)

That finished at around 5.20pm, and I then had to race back into town through traffic to get to my former rented house to hand back the key. I was only 5 minutes late for that. An improvement, but still. I just haven't mastered this being an adult thing, I don't know how they do it.

Foodwise, I am doing okay, but I think I am being very active and burning a lot of nervous energy, so I am probably not overeating the last few days. Sometimes that is the best I can hope for really.

Also Rob, heard this song today on the radio while I was stuck in traffic and nervously looking at the clock, I laughed and thought of you. I also think it kind of suits the whole vibe of my post, haha.

 
Oh, Em. What a day! I really don't what to say. I'm not sure I have mastered this adulting thing either. Hang in there xoxo
 
Hey Emily, thanks for the video, I liked the song and the video was exotic! Not sure why that would have reminded you of me, but I'll take it as a complement.

I have to agree with Cate, just reading your post tired me out. You are quite the busy woman!

Gums are important to healthy teeth, do what you can to keep them healthy. Not much worse than losing teeth, particularly at your age.

Yes, Utah is the state immediately north of Arizona. Its kind of hard to generalize, both states have a wide range of climates, but generally Arizona is warmer, further south and at a lower elevation. You can look at the temperature in Phoenix and subtract about 20 F (11 C) and that's pretty close to what it is here in northern Utah. So when Phoenix is 115 F (46 C) its probably 95 F (35 C) in Salt Lake City. We are in the far north of Utah, 70 miles or so north of Salt Lake, 300+ miles north of the Arizona border, and only about 15 miles from Idaho (next state to the North). The US does have a lot of places to see, I have not seen them all either.
 
Love the song - yes, you are lovable, and no, none of us are robots.
As for being grown-up - you're not alone in having that "not really grown-up" feeling. I think part of the trick is knowing what of the hundred impossible demands you can let go - for instance, I very seldom iron things, and I don't even try for "perfect hair" - "respectable" is as far as I go, on the hair front - and I was thinking just yesterday that I should clean the bath/shower, but still haven't. I don't cook every night - if I cook a curry it should do two meals at least (not consecutively) and so on. As much as you possibly can, go easy on yourself.

On the other hand - yes, for sure, really look after your gums. (Are you flossing a bit too hard, maybe?)

Best wishes for a calmer day today, especially at work.
 
Em I would like to know what advice the dentist actually gave you to turn it around and did you see the hygienist. I use a great toothpaste , mouthwash and a gel when needed and I use a tape not a floss . If you want I'll send you the name. I have gone from having bad gums to good gums but I'm pretty sure I had a " bad butcher " of a hygienist at one point so I don't trust them all.

Basically we all in the same boat I have overflowing laundry baskets at the moment , ironing I really only do for husband my clothes seem to not need so much . I am the expert on being overwhelmed but sometimes you just got to let it all go. You have a lot on at the moment with the play , moving house and work . Take it easy on yourself.
 
You're not just lovable but lovely. About the chores... I'll add my voice to the chorus. The one thing that really helps for me is routine. Do something to unfuck your habitat (not my expression but I love it) every day. Every day,even if it's just 5 minutes of dusting or putting that one pile of books away. I lost the struggle with daily maintenance when I was depressed and it was hard to come back from but now that things are back to a more pleasant level I feel so much better and it doesn't seem like a lot of work anymore. That said: my standard of apartment cleanliness is not as strict as my mom's and I'm fine with that.
One more thing before I stop clogging up your diary: smoking's terrible for your gums...
 
does anyone else struggle to find time for everything and still maintain some sort of a fun existence?
Adulting can be hard sometimes, like the others here, I just have to let some things slide, I don't iron, except for a couple of fancy dresses my gave to my daughter, keeping things simple saves time, I cook simple meals, nothing fancy and the most important, learning to say NO.
 
I was going to wish you good luck, but after looking up "Toitoitoi" can see that's a bad idea:

"Toi toi toi is an expression used in the performing arts to wish an artist success in an imminent performance. It is similar to "break a leg" and reflects a superstition that wishing someone "good luck" is in fact bad luck"

So as Petal says break a leg. Have fun!
 
  • Thank you Cate.
  • Haha Rob, the song is called 'I Am Not a Robot.' Maybe the video distracted you, lol.
  • Not flossing enough Amy. I even find it hard to keep up with the basics at times. My hair wasn't anywhere near presentable today, haha. I was reading this thing about female adults with Asperger's, and one of the 'signs' was that 'they don't do hair.' Immediately, I started taking quizzes. Lol.
  • Please, send me the name Petal. Any advice at all, I will take gladly.
  • I loved your post LaMa. It is something I can definitely put into action. I don't know how depressed I am but I do know that keeping things tidy and orderly is incredibly difficult for me. I sometimes don't know if that is because I am too lazy so I will always choose the 'fun' thing, or if it is because I am depressed. Hmm.
  • I have completely fallen out of a routine of cooking Tru, but when I am in one, I cook lots of simple dishes too - always very nutritious, but 30 minute cooking time max. I must start cooking again.
  • You're a little bit early guys, not till next week! :) Thank you for your ''unwell'' wishes.
Right. I'm not really sure what I want to talk about this evening...

My weighing scales are still in the car after the move, I'm finding that I don't really want to weigh myself, because it's not like I can lose a stone before the play, and knowing the number might make me unhappy and feel self-conscious and that's the last thing I want. I haven't been eating fantastic, but I also haven't been eating too badly either. I actually think I'm not getting in enough iron, so I'm trying to up my intake of red meat, which kind of seems like the opposite of where the world is going. But I have eaten a bit more of it this week, and my skin genuinely looks better, I'm not as tired, and I think I just have been lacking in protein that I can more easily get from meat than trying to eat a load of eggs and beans.

I ended up going for a drink with this guy I know last night, and I have never felt more self-conscious in my life. He kept checking me out! His eyes would not stay focused on my face, haha! Maybe that's a sign of immaturity on his part, but it was so bizarre. Especially because I felt my clothes weren't that flattering really. And then the man I really want to check me out barely looks at me any more. It's so annoying.

I have a day tomorrow of emptying all the bags and boxes in my room, what fun. My previous post probably emphasizes my complete lack of enthusiasm for this task. But it must be done. My duvet has been in my car all week, I look like I'm sleeping in it. So that has to be cleared out tomorrow also.

Besides that, I don't have much on. It's my last 'break' before full steam ahead for show prep. I was in work till 8pm tonight, I was not happy! So I think I will just collapse when all this is over. I have been sleeping a lot better though, got 8 and a half hours last night, asleep within 15 minutes I'd say, which is amazing for me. So my body is taking whatever rest it can get. I've felt a cold coming on all week, have a slight case of laryngitis I'd say, but it seems to be clearing, despite the 11 hour day in work, so that's good. I've definitely had too much screen time today, that's for sure.

Despite some of my complaints above, I am feeling very happy in myself. No, I am not perfect, but at the same time, I'm proud of myself. And that's a great thing to feel, after feeling ashamed, sad, lonely, ugly, and a lot of other unpleasant words for a long time. So pride, in this instance, is a great thing and badly needed. Have a nice weekend friends.
 
Haha Rob, the song is called 'I Am Not a Robot.'
I missed that, you are right it was probably the video that distracted. As LaMa says wouldn't a robot deny being a robot?

I ended up going for a drink with this guy I know last night, and I have never felt more self-conscious in my life. He kept checking me out! His eyes would not stay focused on my face, haha! Maybe that's a sign of immaturity on his part, but it was so bizarre. Especially because I felt my clothes weren't that flattering really. And then the man I really want to check me out barely looks at me any more. It's so annoying.
Interesting to hear about something like this from the other side. I think it is pretty natural for men to check women out, but its also common curtsy to try and not make it obvious. And certainly focusing on the face of the woman you are with shouldn't be hard to do. Also interesting to hear about the guy you wanted to be checking you out. This ain't the kind of "girl talk" I get to hear much. I enjoy reading your posts.

I'm glad to hear that you are feeling happy with yourself, you should. Being proud of yourself is great, perfection never happens.
 
I'm proud of myself. And that's a great thing to feel
Yes, yes, yes! :hurray:
As for the meat, and being the opposite of where the world is going - hang the world and its opinion! - if you look closely, it's really only a few newspapers pushing a line, anyway, and the same newspapers will very happily review the latest celebrity meat-cooking chef or restaurant. Your skin responding shows that your body knows better than a journo or some instagrammer what you personally need.
My weighing scales are still in the car after the move, I'm finding that I don't really want to weigh myself, because it's not like I can lose a stone before the play, and knowing the number might make me unhappy and feel self-conscious and that's the last thing I want.
This is really wise! Yes, you'll get back to them, but now is not the time. (I have the suspicion that you'll find that so much running around for the play as well as everything else will have brought your weight down, but yes, the scales can wait!)
Best wishes for the last week of rehearsing and fine-tuning. :)
 
Being happy beats being closer to perfect by miles.

I hope I'm not shattering your worldview here but women check men out just as much - they just seem to be better at hiding it unless drunk.
Haha I agree .

The toothpaste is KINgingivalComplex. Mouthwash same and it's pleasant not harsh like listerine etc. I use sensikin gel on my gums which I need to start again as they are a bit sensitive. You can get them in Boots with all the other toothpaste products. Brush gently too . I have electric brush and use it very gently but some recommend just a soft brush.

Glad you doing ok and we will be back to tell you to break a leg next week !
 
How is your weekend going, Em?
 
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