Derrick's ongoing journey

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Well I think my wife is just now doing better. I think she just needed time to grieve. Thanks again to everyone who kept us in your thoughts and prayers! :)

I have been gaining weight like crazy because of the darn bi-polar meds I started 5 weeks ago. I am 203 right now but you can't really tell I have gained weight IMHO. Regardless, it needs to end NOW! I go in to the doc on Thursday to talk about the side effects of the meds he has me on. I have gained 10 lbs in the last 5 weeks after losing 58 lbs in 13 months! It is a fact that certain meds can mess with your metabolism and/or appetite and cause you to gain weight rapidly. This is not the first time in my life this has happened to me. The only difference is this time I am not going to tolerate it.
 
Hey Derrick! Looks like I stumbled upon some good news and bad news...

I am so happy you are becoming a Personal Trainer! That is awesome! You will do so great!

I am so sorry about the miscarriage... I can't imagine how that must feel... I will keep you in my thoughts as you try to creat another life....

I just wanted to update you real quick.... I'm got a trainer for the next 12 weeks and he is training for a Figure Competition in March! I am so stoked! I will try and update my journal and my progress!!

Talk to you soon!!
 
Hey, good to hear from you! :) I was starting to think I'd never hear from you again. Sounds like you might be making some serious progress over the next 12 weeks! There are a few guys AND GIRLS at our gym that do the figure competitions. It's really neat to see the girls go from too buff to smoking hot in just a matter of weeks. I haven't had a chance to steal any tips from any of them yet but hopefully in time I will get a chance to have a conversation with one of them.
 
Hey, good to hear from you! :) I was starting to think I'd never hear from you again. Sounds like you might be making some serious progress over the next 12 weeks! There are a few guys AND GIRLS at our gym that do the figure competitions. It's really neat to see the girls go from too buff to smoking hot in just a matter of weeks. I haven't had a chance to steal any tips from any of them yet but hopefully in time I will get a chance to have a conversation with one of them.

Oh, don't be silly! Of course I am going to still come over here to talk to you, Melissa and Chef!

Yeah, it is totally awesome! It's not bodybuilding, so you can still maintain your womanly curves but with structure.

So how is Personal Training certification going?
 
Hi Derrick, I decided to check out your diary after you repped one of my posts. Thank you! I am so sorry to hear about your wife's miscarriage. It is always sad & is best to be able to grieve the loss. I am sure that your daughter won't be lacking in love, affection or attention from the two of you after reading a few pages of your diary. A healthy baby will come along for you some time in the future.
I love reading about other people who realise how lucky they are to have a loving relationship & who cherish it & grow together. I'm an incurable romantic. I have been with my husband for almost 38 years & we are much closer & happier than we were back then. Some people grow together, some grow apart. It's nice that you are so appreciative. You look like a lovely couple.
I think you made a really good decision to break out of the family business & make your own way in the world. If you can turn a passion or an interest into a job you are laughing. We had both our sons in our business & it works for a while but it is unfair to expect your offspring or anyone else for that matter to work similarly or as hard as our generation was brought up to do. We encouraged them to become independent before any resentment set in & it has been really good for both of them & although it made it harder for us we knew it was the right decision. I am really proud of our sons. They are excellent lovely men. If you explain to your father that you don't want to jeopardise your relationship with him & that you love him he should understand, perhaps not straight away, but in time. Cheers for now, Cate
 
hey there, i have been pretty MIA lately... im sorry about that. I am sorry to hear about your loss..... my heart sank for you both...

but just remember God has a plan... which i know you alredy know.


hang in there! Give your hunnie a big hug for me ok?!?! :)
 
Cate, thanks for the advice and kind words. :) My wife and I are doing much better this week. She's back to her self again and we are planning on spending some family time this weekend which should help also. My dad and I have already had a good talk so things are looking positive there also.

hey there, i have been pretty MIA lately... im sorry about that. I am sorry to hear about your loss..... my heart sank for you both...

but just remember God has a plan... which i know you alredy know.


hang in there! Give your hunnie a big hug for me ok?!?! :)

Hi Melissa! I was wondering where you have been but heck, I'm the one that told you to take a week off so maybe you took my advice? :biggrinjester:
Thank you for thinking of us. Hopefully in a few more months she will be pregnant again but for now we are going to let her fully recover. They recommend one or two cycles pass after a miscarriage before attempting another pregnancy. I'll go check out your diary and see how you have been doing. :)
 
My condolences to you and your family.

Don't worry to much about the gain. You'll get it back off. I'm kinda in the same boat. I gained a few pounds in the last couple of weeks, but that was due to my own lack of motivation. Now that I will be making a career change in the next month, my attitude has changed and I'm getting back on track.

Just like me, I believe you also will get yourself back into the groove and on to more weight loss.

Keep it up. No retreat, No surrender.
 
No good news to report in my neck of the woods. I am up to 204.5. :banghead: I hate to even type it but its the truth. Please excuse my choice of words in this post. :eek:

Let me start off by saying I FN hate antidepressants and anxiety medications! :cuss: Since the day I started taking the meds about 6 or 7 weeks ago I have gained 11.5 lbs! My energy has declined and my appetite has increased enormously. I started a new medicine this week and I will give it one more week. If I continue to gain weight I am done with medication forever. About 18 months ago I swore I would never take meds again but I let my wife talk me into going back a couple months ago. Things were going great in all areas of my life except for anxiety and sensitivity to noise. I also get highly suspicious of people and what they are up to. I will admit it was getting very hard to deal with but at least I was able to get by. If I don't stop this weight gain soon I'll be obese again and even more unhappy. I'd rather be physically healthy and fight my own mental battles than be mentally relaxed and physically unhealthy. :rant:

About the only thing in my house doing worse than I am is my punching bag. Speaking of which, I think he's talking trash right now...I'll be right back. :boxing:
 
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OK...I'm...back. Showed...him...a thing...or...two. :ack2:

:biggrinjester:

All joking aside, I refuse to let satan win this battle. I seriously do sometimes pretend my punching bag is satan. :reddevil: As weird as non believers thinks it sounds, I really do believe the devil wants us to fail and relishes in it. Everytime I win a personal battle I view it as a triumph against satan. So in some ways I'm excited because when I get back on track I get to piss him off all over again.

Anyways, last night I did upper body and treadmill with my wife. This morning I did the treadmill for 30 minutes. Tomorrow I plan on doing bodyflow and cardio. I am really trying hard to control my eating and drinking. I will weigh myself Sunday morning and see how things are going.
 
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Hey there how have you been? Havent been on in a few days so i thought i would check in with you. I ran into this same situation but with birthcontrol meds... and within a week i had gained 8lbs! It was insane! So i quit taking them....

im sure its a little different being that this is for mental stability etc... but my moods were horendous and it just wacked my whole attitude and mind like crazy!


Hope you and the wife are doing well... thanks for checking out my journal the other day... been sick so ive been off and on MIA..... but i feel better now and am back in action hehe
TTYL
 
TTYL?

Take TYLenol???

I'm doing ok I guess. It's just been one thing after another in August for both me and my wife. I'm hoping September will be a better month for me and my family. My lower back has really been causing me a lot of pain lately so I am going to the orthopedic doc tomorrow. I'm sure he will want to get an MRI. I've been putting it off for years. It's gotten so bad lately that I can't sleep at night with pain radiating down my right leg. Whatever, bring it on I guess. I'm just down because all of these things are wearing on me. I should be making progress not degress, if that is even a word.

I can't promise I will post much in my journal, especially if there is no good news to report. I will still visit my friends' journals though. You included Melissa. ;)
 
Awwww....Derrick...you have to come by to your journal. Even to post the not so good things because that is what it's about. Fighting the devil, and if you don't, then you let him win. The reason he wins, is because you aren't expressing the mental struggles that you are encountering. The negative mental battles...how can you fight them, if you don't allow them out!?!?!!?

YOU HAVE TO REPORT EVEN IF NO ONE SAYS SHIT...cause it's therapeutic in itself. PERIOD.!! :iagree:

...1/2 the battle is AWARENESS!!! ....you are a wise man...and you should know that stress levels have a lot to do with weight gain, as well as placebo effects do. If you think that the anti depressants are going to make you gain weight ...THEN THEY WILL.....

.....you know....YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS MIND rules 88% of your total mind power...and your CONSCIOUS mind..only a mere 12%~!

....Let us help you with the mental battle....BETTER YET! Help yourself through venting.!!! :iagree:!

...We love you here MAN!!! CHEER UP!!! PUT YOUR CHIN UP~!!!!...and REMEMBER that you (excuse my language ;) ) ...ARE A FUCK'N SOLDIER ...and YOU CAN AND WILL DO WHAT YOUR HEART DESIRES~~~!!!!......and if BEING HEALTHY IS IT~!!!!! ...SO BE IT!!!!! :iagree:!!!

....you are a FIGHTER....a TROOPER....and I knowwwww...that this can't HOLD YOU BACK!....(and you have your lovely wife to support you and you to support her!!) :grouphug:!!!!
 
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I wish I had an Alta in my neighborhood. You have a way of making people feel better. Thank you. :)

I spent most of the week away from the gym. I worked out last Saturday and then I swam yesterday. That's been it. I have lost some weight though since switching medicines. My doc is now giving me a more weight neutral drug to try. I've been on it for about 10 days now and I have come down to 201.5. So far so good. My wife is doing ok too. She had a follow up appt and everything is fine.

I have a nasty cold from the ragweed floating around but it is raining right now so I'm hoping that will help. I also get an MRI on my lower back on Monday the 14th. It has felt better the last few days, I actually slept well the last two nights.

Hoping to be below 200 again in the next week or two.
 
Awww...thanks buddy...you too!!! :grouphug:!!!

...Alright!! Down some lbs....and now...to the important stuff...how did the MRI go?!?! Good I hope!!! :iagree:!!!....
 
My MRI was scheduled for this coming Monday the 14th but my insurance company wants me to do physical therapy first. I feel fine during the day, its night time that I have trouble. I get a dull throbbing pain down the outside of my right leg stemming from my lower back and buttocks. It wakes me up and keeps me up a lot of nights.

I met with my old psychiatrist last Friday about 5 hours after my last post. She had some insight and suggestions for me. She says my symptoms are indicative of someone with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder but she says bipolar can cause those symptoms also. The good news is the medicine I am on works for both of those. She will just have to figure out which one I have as the symptoms get better or worse. So far the medicine I am on seems to be working. My weight gain has stopped and my energy levels have gone up a little bit. I'm not tired during the day anymore. My mental state has improved considerably this week as well. We still hate our house though so I think we are going to move as soon as we are able to. If we move down a little bit it will help our financial situation considerably.

Unfortunately I was at one of the farms all week and was unable to work out at all. I ate pretty good though. Nothing much else to report. For anyone still reading, I'm sorry my journal hasn't been very inspirational lately. I'm just going through some challenging times but the Lord has never let me down. So give me a little bit longer to come out of this and I promise I'll get back to kicking some major arse. :coolgleamA:
 
i think now that summer is winding down, people will be on here more and our journals will see more activity. I know only posting for one or two people to read sometimes can be frustrating... i was a bit down about that not too long ago.

Heck.. ive been MIA on here as well... sometimes i feel that posting stuff doesnt matter much to people... and heck I ALREADY know how things have been with me so why should i type all that up!?? lol


glad to see your doc has you on a diff med.... i think that was needed. Last thing you need when battling personal feelings and moods... is the med they are using to help you, causing your weight to go up... sounds counteractive to me... since losing is imporatant to you!!!


glad to see you and your wife are both doing better!:cheers2:
 
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