Derrick's ongoing journey

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Hey Derrick! Just checking in on you! I'm glad you got your meds figured out and yay for house hunting; even if it is to down size. Always live within your means! I miss my buddy! You are a rock and such an inspiration! Keep up the good work... by the way, I'm down to 155.... (well 151 with the 4 pounds on the boob job) boo ya... figure comp coming up in March 2010...
 
Hi girl. Long time no read. :D That's awesome you are doing so good. When things are going great that's when you have to take full advantage of it and work your butt off! Seems like when things aren't going so great it takes everything you have just to hang on. I'm really in a funk right now. I even smoked 4 packs of cigarettes this week. Funny thing is I didn't have any anger or anxiety all week but I can't allow myself to get addicted again. It's so damn hard to stop. I'm going to try going this weekend without a cigarette just to see if I'm addicted or not. I'm also going to workout with my wife today and try to eat healthy all weekend. I'll start there. I feel like I'm starting all over again, just at a much lower weight. I was 206.0 last night. First goal is 199.
 
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You have done a great job so far with your weight-loss journey! A Wonderful job!! Good luck with the remainder! :)

Glad to have you apart of the Spooktaculars! Let's kick some a$$!
 
Hi and thank you. I am pretty excited about being on a team even if it's over the internet. I feel like we are all striving for the same thing and that gets me motivated.
 
Crazy thing happened this morning. I weighed 200.0. That's six lbs lost in four days. I'm pretty sure that has never happened before. I'm thinking it is because of something extremely scary and stressfull that happened this week at my house. I'm ok but I had to use force to protect myself and my family.
 
WOOOOA!!!...6 lbs is a lot!!...:iagree: Good job all around, though I hope it isn't stress weight and it's some good eating weight!! :D!

..your funk will be over if it isn't any time now :toetap05:! ;)

..and cigarrettes huh!?!?! Woa Derrick, ...stop that pony right there before it does become a ritual....Replace that Habit there!!!!...:iagree:

.....So when you smoke cigarrettes is it to take a break from whatever it is you are doing, or you continue doing what you are doing yet the cigarrette dimishes the stress?

...just curious, I used to smoke a pack a day almost years ago....it seems so crazy NOW!
 
Mostly for stress. I take a break and stop what I'm doing or I smoke in the car. It is helping me cope with the stress I am under right now. I will stop as soon as we move out of this house and into another one.
 
So weigh in was Friday and I was 201.0. Then yesterday and today I was 200.5 so it looks like the weight loss is real for the time being. Still smoking though so it looks like I will have to once again fight to quit. Sorry to report that peeps but I'm just being honest. I am hopefull and optimistic that I will be able to do so around October or November once things settle down and I start to hate them again. For now I'm just trying to eat healthy and get my family moved. I am only working out once or twice a week. I am also doing physical therapy twice a week for a bulging disk in my lower back.
 
Hey buddy! Glad you are ok after whatever the scare you and your family had the other week! Yikkkkes! i can only imagine what it was. Congrats on some weightloss so far! glad to see things are looking up for you!

LAY OFF THE CIGSSSSS!!!!!!!! :)
 
Derrick said:
Mostly for stress. I take a break and stop what I'm doing or I smoke in the car. It is helping me cope with the stress I am under right now. I will stop as soon as we move out of this house and into another one.
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You know it's funny, cause for people who use smoking as stress relievers, it's not the cigarrette that does that, but it's the DEEP BREATH TAKING that relieves some stress. ...If you were to replace that moment of overload with taking 8 deep breaths in & out...you would get those same relaxation feelings, snap yourself out of hypnosis overload...and get a Clearer mental picture and a more stable feeling of relaxation.

....what seems to be the problem here, is that people seem to forget that they need a break just as much, with or without the cigarette to smoke, yet when you have the cigarrette it's much easier to "remember" to walk and take 8-10 deep breaths....cause you are smoking........you generally don't see people walk outside or stop for a minute in their car, and roll down the window and take in HUGE breaths....we forget....

....Do it Derrick...see how it makes life that much easier to cope with in moments of overload....:D! :iagree:!

.....Glad you are losing those pounds there! Things will settle down for you....but just start with taking in more deep breaths....
 
Melissa, I'm fine, the other guy not so much but I hope he's ok now.

Alta, I never thought of it that way. I plan on stopping on my b-day, Oct 30th. I will try your suggestions from that day on.

Thanks girls!

Derrick
 
Hello Derrick,

Just wanted to take a quick stop in...Thanks for coming by my diary. I often find it difficult to make the rounds of everyone else's.

I am sorry to hear you're having a bit of a ride with life right now, and I hope all turns out for the better.

Take Care​
 
Hey there buddy... long time no talkie! Im sorry that you had to drop from the halloween challenge. Im sure the team would prefer that i drop... i havent helped the team out one bit this whole time.


booo.... keep fluctuating those 4 lbs.... for the last 3 MONTHS..... so freakin annoying.


anyways i hope life is being kind to you and you are doing well. I hate to see ya down. Did the docs get the meds all squared away and what not?

How's that smokin hot wife of yours doing :)

Hope things are well and everything is falling into place!

sorry ive sucked at being around lately... life has taken over my day to day free time hehe
 
Melissa Revived the Journal!!!..:D!!!...She's great at that! D!

...I second her motion....I do hope you are feeling better as well!...And would love a little report here from you!!!...:D!!!....no pressure ;)...heheh
 
Hi girls and thanks for thinking of me. :) I haven't wanted to post here because the news hasn't been so great physically speaking. After nearly two months of not exercising, smoking and even binge eating I am now up to 209 now. It shows too. I'm not looking fat yet but my belly has packed on most of the pounds and my pants are starting to get tight. I blame half of those pounds on the meds but the good news is, after four months of feeling like a guinea pig, I think I have finally found the right one and the right dosage. I am doing a lot better from a mental standpoint. I hope I'm not making it sound like I was a mental case before. Things just bothered me very much a few months ago. Everyday sounds would drive me mad. It was very hard to relax and not get upset about things. In that regard, I am much better now.

I did workout twice this week and it felt good. I am still smoking but I'm cutting down and I plan on quitting very soon. We move in exactly one week so I still have some stress ahead. November will be extremely busy for me at the farms so I am really not planning on getting back into an exercise routine until the first week of December. I already talked to a personal trainer I know at my gym. I told him I'm signing up come December.

Perhaps this slip is just what it took for me to get everything together. It always seems like I can't figure out how to be physically and mentally healthy at the same time. Maybe this time it will work.

I'll post in this journal a few times between now and December. Then its time to kick ass again.

I'm happy for both of you. You two have done so well and you both keep me thinking positive. Thank you, sincerely. :)

Derrick :coolgleamA:
 
RunningGirl said:
Hello Derrick,

Just wanted to take a quick stop in...Thanks for coming by my diary. I often find it difficult to make the rounds of everyone else's.

I am sorry to hear you're having a bit of a ride with life right now, and I hope all turns out for the better.

Take Care​
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I'm sorry I didn't even see this until now. Thank you also for thinking of me. You are also like a machine. :D You've done very well and continue to do so. :smash:
 
Well it has been a while hasn't it? After this post I plan on checking in on everyone's journals. My busy November is coming to an end. I am already mentally preparing myself for December. Starting next week, I am going to sign up for 24 personal training sessions and I am also going to get back into exercising nearly every day. I am very thankfull that I have not gained any weight since the middle of October. I am currently 208 lbs. Sure, it sucks that I have put on 15 lbs since July but 208 is no big deal at all. I know what it took to go from 251 to 193. So 208 seems like a walk in the park.

Back when I was 251 over 18 months ago I had a target weight of 189 in mind. Throughout my journey I changed my target weight several times. At one point I made it 196. When I reached that weight I set my sights on 189 again. As I dropped down to 193 I changed my target to 185 and even 181 at one point. I guess I got ahead of myself because I never even reached 189.

So this time around, I'm going to make sure I hit 189 no matter what. I really like the way I look and feel at 195 or less. So 189 should be a great weight for me. I miss working out. I miss swimming, biking, running, martial arts, weight lifting and all the good feelings that come with knowing you are in great shape. It's going to be tough at first because I'm out of shape right now but I'm really looking forward to starting a new journey.

Wish me luck. I'll post again next week.

Derrick
 
This morning I had my first of 25 personal training sessions. It was an awesome victory from a mental standpoint but a crushing defeat from a physical standpoint. I finished the whole workout but then I nearly puked and fainted. At one point I thought I needed medical attention. It took me 45 minutes to recover before I could even stand up and walk. I think the 3 months of smoking, over eating and not exercising affected me more than I expected. I never want another ciggarette as long as I live. I plan on doing 30 minutes of cardio everyday this week in preparation for my next personal training session on Friday morning. Wish me luck!
 
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