Curvie Girlie The Diary: Mind Playin' Tricks on Me

[T2 Trucker]

recent photos?

haha, you so jerked me off about the bikini scenario. Just how much more ready could THAT body actually have to be for a two-piecer?? That's pure green light, imho.

You're such a dream girl.

 

[MissDFITT]

You're such a dream girl.

AWWWW, that was just too sweet!!

 

[Curvie Girlie]

Awww, hey, that WAS sweet, awwww well now I'm feeling warm hearted here

 

[douknowjello]

First Val, you look FRIGGIN AMAZING! Do you know how many women (me included) would KILL for a body like yours? I mean SERIOUSLY!!!! Even when I lose my weight I don't see myself looking that hot!

And you're grandma was one very smart, wise woman. But then yea...that's one of the great thing about us Taurus women

PZ...sounds like an absolute PRINCE! I'm married but can't help but be envious! The connection, the compliments...the communication! So I was thinking to myself I need to work on putting more into my relationship so maybe hubby will catch on

And the dress....you can't just tell us about a dress like that and not post PICS! *hugz* ~Lisa

 

[Curvie Girlie]

First Val, you look FRIGGIN AMAZING! Do you know how many women (me included) would KILL for a body like yours? I mean SERIOUSLY!!!! Even when I lose my weight I don't see myself looking that hot!

Awww thanks Lisa! My friends on here have made me more and more appreciative of my goods, thanks everyone! Steve said once, recently, that I was "genetically blessed" and I was shocked because I always used to blame my genes for my tendency to binge eat, put on fat easily, etc., etc., whatever. And the more I look at the pictures, the more complacent I get on appreciating my body because I still have "fat days," believe it or not. But the truth of the matter is I use practically ALL my spare time during the week to dedicate to exercise, especially the Intermediate Yoga. Most people with more responsibilities (children, parents, school, and yes, even spouses ) don't have that kind of time. And I understand that. But there's no way I'd look like this if I wasn't doing what I do, of course. HOWEVER Lisa, I personally think you COULD look as hot as you think I look, it just would take time. And tons of dedication, and I might even say MISERY . I'm still in "diet mode" even though I'm not really dieting, because I was used to eating 2500-2800 calories a day when I was doing lots of cardio in addition to being heavier and having a higher caloric requirement; right now I'm doing NO cardio and I keep that in mind. I will, eventually--when it warms up and gets lighter. The weight training, rock climbing, and Yoga seem to keep my metabolism going, and I think I eat about 2300 calories a day, now--1500 of which I consume all before 3pm. SO if I want dinner, dessert, and drinks I have to be REALLY mindful--800 calories go FAST! Shit, it goes just like that if I share a medium Margarita pizza with Chris and have some wine and a snack-sized Snickers, which leaves me feeling I haven't really had a decent dinner. Anyway, what I'm saying is, thank you very much for the compliment, and I worked VERY hard to get to this body composition, and it took a long long time! I think the last time I felt "chubby" was in May 2007, and I was only 152 lbs then, not even over-weight! That's when my ex dumped me for a 19 year old and it kinda spurred my determination!

And you're grandma was one very smart, wise woman. But then yea...that's one of the great thing about us Taurus women

HEY! Yiah! CHEERS! I like Taurus-women pleasantness, as well

PZ...sounds like an absolute PRINCE! I'm married but can't help but be envious! The connection, the compliments...the communication! So I was thinking to myself I need to work on putting more into my relationship so maybe hubby will catch on

Awww, sweet, positive loving motivation, I LOVE it! The interesting phenomenon is that since our relationship is so new, I try very hard to make it the best, ever--and it is! But it includes me doing little tricks, like checking myself before I speak so I speak kindly and lovingly, and making sure that even if I'm in a bad mood, I don't ever take it out on him. Also, I stay away from him sometimes!!! HA! I mean, I make sure we don't spend too much time together because THAT's when things can get tricky between two lovers. And like I mentioned, I make sure to remember that he's a BOY and boys think and behave in certain ways that sometimes piss us off and hurt our feelings when they have no idea how their behavior is affecting us. I used to take things SO personally with the ex, and yeah he was way more insulting and rude than PZ is, but I seriously created relationship drama and spawned misery at times, out of perceived slights to my ego or pride. I'll tell you Lisa; I learned my fucking lesson and I apply my wisdom at all times. BUT it helps that PZ is so sweet to me and treats me so well--makes it easy!

And the dress....you can't just tell us about a dress like that and not post PICS! *hugz* ~Lisa

I will! I can hardly wait!

 

[douknowjello]

You make some very good points about relationships. I'm working very hard on checking myself lately but it's hard when you live in together. But lately I've realized some of the actions of my husband that I've been really building up resentment about isn't to do with me personally. He admitted the other day that he's been depressed and it suddenly all made sense so I've really been working on trying to be a kinder more understanding wife....even when he does go to bed and leave his dishes sitting out with food on it :X lol. And space...we used to live in a small apartment but the house we just bought has a livingroom and den so luckily we can both be in different rooms now and relax without being on top of eachother.

 

[Curvie Girlie]

I'm working very hard on checking myself lately but it's hard when you live in together.

But lately I've realized some of the actions of my husband that I've been really building up resentment about isn't to do with me personally. He admitted the other day that he's been depressed and it suddenly all made sense so I've really been working on trying to be a kinder more understanding wife....even when he does go to bed and leave his dishes sitting out with food on it :X lol.

Awww, your poor hubby! I know, you know, I noticed that us women sometimes forget about our man's feelings, while being hyper-sensitive about our own. I have been guilty of it. Men seem to be better at hiding them and also less likely to swing to extremes of moods unless provoked, but that's just a generalization. Anyway, when it rings true in a situation, it makes it easy to forget that it's unfair to be bitchy toward them And yeah, PZ isn't filthy or particularly sloppy, but I'm definitely a clean freak in comparison! Glad we don't live together.......yet. OMG did I say that?

 

[Curvie Girlie]

Signing off for the weekend

I didn't go to 12:15pm Yoga today, and my muscles are sore from the climbing and intense Yoga Ashtanga Vinyasa Level 2 If anything, I should do some cardio, but I am really tired and worn out from the week. Work has been truly stressful for me, but I'm proud of my accomplishments. It's not easy producing creative and aesthetically pleasing advertising art ON CALL, all the time, which is why I have to take breaks to get over "writers' block" at times.

I'll be in heels tonight, so no dancing And I can't dance barefoot because I'd be afraid of stepping on my dress--it requires heels not to drag. I think I'm gonna bring a comfy outfit with me JUST IN CASE I get sick of being in a fancy dress and heels at the party--and I probably will!

I doubt I'll get any exercise in tomorrow with work and all (11:45am to 5pm in the tasting room) but I'll bring running clothes JUST in case I feel inclined to wake up early (YEAH RIGHT!) and go for a forest bunny romp before work. Have a great weekend everybody!

Oh yes, I'm not dieting but I'm eating like I am, today--I want to save some room for Italian cuisine tonight. The party is at Cafe Mare and they have some GOOD Gorgonzola Gnocci

 

[Curvie Girlie]

Sunday evening

I'm in my hometown, an hour and 15 minutes away from home, and on my grandpa's nice Mac and figured I might as well update my weekend.


Friday: I talked to Chris, and he actually expressed some hope that I would wear my fancy, Versace knock off with HIM when he took me to San Francisco for the fancy dinner we've been talking about. For those of you who don't already know, Chris used to be a chef when he wasn't so ill, and he recently inherited mucho dinero from his materal grandmother, and he wants to show me what it's like to dine at a five star restaurant Anyway, I said I would wear my fancy dress when that times comes, so Friday I said Ok I'll wait, and I dressed in my SECOND most fancy dress. However, when I go to PZ's, I realized I was physically, mentally, and emotionally drained and had a meltdown.

I consider myself upbeat and tough. I do all sorts of postitive things (exercise, Yoga, meditation, calling family memebers, visiting friends, spending time in nature, doing somewhat altrustic activities) to keep myself balanced and happy. Work, for me lately, has been majorly demanding and for some reason it really got to me--not to mention my entire body was sore from weight lifting, rock climbing, intense Yoga, and a slight lack of sleep. I was all dressed up in makeup and jewelry when I admitted to my boyfriend that I was fried and close to tears SO what does he do? Says, "we can just stay here [his house] and I'll give you a full body massage." Oh gawd, I got into my PJs and let him! THEN he "finished me off" in his skillfull and enthusiastic way I have....the best boyfriend .

Saturday work went well, and PZ was off to Kirkwood Resort to snowboard (he wanted to catch the storm); he wanted to take me but I had to work Sunday (today) and also from Monday to March 6th my co worker is on vacation and I have to help cover her duties. So we're going the weekend of March 7th. Anyway, Chris and I went to dinner at a new restaurant/wine bar in Scotts Valley called Sandaubs. The food was excellent and the wine was superb; I had Cremant d'Alsace sparkling wine with 6 Oysters on the half shell, an organic green salad with goat cheese and vinaigrette, and then my entree was huge, delicious scallops in a delicious citrus reduction sauce and grilled vegtables (including boktroy, which I like but for some reason don't eat very often) and Jasmine rice. Dessert was a TINY, TINY creme brulee. Sorry I have no accents, I'm on a Mac and I dunno where to find the extra characters....

Last night Barre was SO loud and SO drunk, and I really had to wear earplugs--lately he's been up until 3:30am every night he's home, drinking and shooting his shotgun off our porch. He never drinks when he's at his other home, it's weird! Anyway, we had brunch together at Scopazzi's and I had goat cheese Bruschetta and a brandy margarita, haha! Then I drove here to the Bay and poured wine at the fancy Safeway for 3 hours. Now I'm with my maternal grandparents about to go visit my mom before driving home.

Anyway, NO cardio--rain rain rain and my gym is miles away from my house, on the way to work. I weighed in at 142.5 lbs this morning and it must have been the big dinner, plus I think I'm ovulating and for some strange reason my weight always goes up a few pounds if I'm not dieting at this time....however, before Barre and I went to the restaurant I ate a PIZZA for breakfast! I was hungry!!! It was a 800 calorie pizza. Wow. What the fuck is my problem? Must be stress. I better make sure I get good sleep tonight.....

Anyway, I missed the big party Friday and now I miss my wonderful boyfriend, who said me might be snowed in until Wednesday night--I might not see him until Thursday! "Oh well!"

 

[hickgurltx]

OooO sweetie-pie, I'm so happy bc you are so happy and I'm so glad you have such a gr8 BF FINALLY!


Man, that was a mouth full.

I miss ya punkin' butt!
*snorts*

Have A Goal Reachin' Monday, ya hear?!

<3 Stacy

 

[jzthedetermined]

I hope things at work calm down for you! Ah... pizza for breakfast = breakfast of champions!!!
I'm glad you got some TLC when you needed it... gotta love a great "J"!! Happy Monday.

 

[Mamaz2ndbaby]

Sounds like a nice relaxing Saturday....take some time this week to relax Missy

 

[Curvie Girlie]

Stacy, Josh and Tysha--you sweet things! Thanks!

It's Monday, and the rain in NoCali won't stop!

It's annoying, but I'm glad--we need that shit. It's gonna affect the rest of the U.S., too! HELLO!!! "The drought-forced cutbacks are a huge blow to thousands of farmers in the Central Valley, which produces over half of the fruit, vegetables and nuts grown in the United States. Higher prices are likely for a wide range of crops as a result." Not good. However,

I'm wondering about Steve, Gordy & gang but I don't understand right now

I just want to say, I'm GLAD Kate Winslet won that oscar. I like her. I liked her best in that horrifying New Zealand flick Beautiful Creatures. And Sean Penn rules!!! What a great "for shame!" speech to homophobes, hahahahaha! ​

Me:
I overate yesterday, and had too much sugar, refined carbs, alcohol, and fat. My weight is up, so much I'd rather not even bother with thinking about it--however, I'm pleased to announce that I have a plan--pretty much it includes not drinking during the week, eating more fresh fruits and vegetables, and avoiding inflammatory foods like the kinds I've been imbibing without giving much thought to it. I might even start a Challenge......but I have to be crafty and I have to consult Melissa, and also make sure not to compete too heavily with the other folks' challenges. I was thinking of making the guidelines follow .....we'll see!

My county: Trees keep falling over and ruining things. Yesterday on HWY 17 a tree fell on a car. This may be typical of other parts of the US, but Cali is pretty mild. A tree fell and ruined a bunch of power lines on one of my roads to work, and I had to turn around and take an alternate freeway exit. AND a bunch of rubberneckers stuffed up traffic Southbound, when in the Northbound HWY 1 lane, a tree apparently fell on a fucking TRUCK . Anyway, I'm still glad for this rain--we need water for food.

 

[LynnZ]

Me:
I overate yesterday, and had too much sugar, refined carbs, alcohol, and fat. My weight is up, so much I'd rather not even bother with thinking about it--however, I'm pleased to announce that I have a plan--pretty much it includes not drinking during the week, eating more fresh fruits and vegetables, and avoiding inflammatory foods like the kinds I've been imbibing without giving much thought to it. I might even start a Challenge......but I have to be crafty and I have to consult Melissa, and also make sure not to compete too heavily with the other folks' challenges. I was thinking of making the guidelines follow .....we'll see!



I'll do a challenge w/ you I overate this past weekend too blah.

Wonder how steve and gordy are? I bet he is having an absolute blast!!
How was PZ's snowboarding trip?

 

[chouston]

Me:
I overate yesterday, and had too much sugar, refined carbs, alcohol, and fat. My weight is up, so much I'd rather not even bother with thinking about it--however, I'm pleased to announce that I have a plan--pretty much it includes not drinking during the week, eating more fresh fruits and vegetables, and avoiding inflammatory foods like the kinds I've been imbibing without giving much thought to it. I might even start a Challenge......but I have to be crafty and I have to consult Melissa, and also make sure not to compete too heavily with the other folks' challenges. I was thinking of making the guidelines follow .....we'll see!

At least you are aware that you've gained a few pounds and have a plan of attack

So many people wake up one day and say "where the heck did these extra 50 pounds come from?!

 

[Curvie Girlie]

Lindsey: I'll devise a challenge then--call it the "USDA" challenge or something....I bet it's been done before

I know, I miss Steve!

PZ is so cute, he texted me yesterday after I texted him that I missed him and was soooooo horny (heh ) and said "We should be in bed snuggling naked." YES, I agree, we should have been!!!

Chousten: It's all about checking oneself!

 

[niapage]

Hey there curvie Val ty for dropping by and saying hi!! And I think alot of us overate the sweets lol I had a bad bad week and maked down dove valentines truffles dont help lmao! Anyway its a boring monday and a new week and no dancing in heels lol?
Have a gr8 week

 

[Alta818]

Val you are a good girlfriend!!! ....You sound just like me...that's exactly what I do when I get that little vibe going on!! Business and Guy friends over will almost always do that....though with the occasional minimal display of affection on their part. It's just something about men, not wanting to be IN LOVE SQUISHY MUTHAFUCKAS in front of friends!!! PSH!!!!!!!!! Let it out...YOU BIG PUSSY CUDDLE BUGS!! !! !!!...hahah.....!!!

.....Actually I'm just kidding,...don't let it out...I don't really like that either...like when you are around another couple and ALL THEY can do is not keep their hands off each other.......makes you feel weird ya know...."LIKE OK....CAN YOU FUCKN WAIT A MINUTE YOU HORNY MUTHAAAAASSSS"!!! ....shitttt....or put on a real show!! ..hehehe....LOL!!!

.....Sucks about the snowboarding weekend... I knew you would have loved it and become a pro at it too!!! I still want to go sooo bad!! i just have to find the time!!! SOON I hope!!!

.....I can't wait to see your new dress!!! And about your body....HELL YA PZ, better tell ya it's HOT ...cause it is...I don't know if I'm a stickler for details, but I sure as hell noticed the difference in your 7.5 lbs loss....with the side by side pics!!! Omg.. I can't even tell you how good you look!!! Interesting that you still have fat days....when the FUCK do those go away ...!!! There's no hope I see.....I guess we all have those WHACK ASS MIRROR DAYS!!!

....PZ really sounds so much like my bf to me more and more....I got LAVISHED WITH COMPLIMENTS and GREAT SEX TOO thanks to my new slimmer curves!! ... CHEeeeooooOoWWW!!! !!!!

....I want some Champagne.....right now too.....did I tell you I quit for another 30 days......I'm on day 8 today!!! PSH!!!! EASY!!! HEHEH!!! Do it once, you can DO IT AGAIN!!! That's life baby!!! I miss you woman!!!!

 

[Curvie Girlie]

a new week and no dancing in heels lol?
Have a gr8 week

No! Thanks for stopping by, Tammy, you sure are beautiful at any size and with any hair color!

t's just something about men, not wanting to be IN LOVE SQUISHY MUTHAFUCKAS in front of friends!!! PSH!!!!!!!!! Let it out...YOU BIG PUSSY CUDDLE BUGS!!

WORD!

Sucks about the snowboarding weekend... I knew you would have loved it and become a pro at it too!!! I still want to go sooo bad!! i just have to find the time!!! SOON I hope!!!

I definitely hope we BOTH get to, soon!

The most exciting thing about it, for me, is the promise of LUXURY Like, we'll be at Kirkwood, which is a great resort, around a bunch of RICH COKE HAGS, hahaha! But seriously he's paying for a lesson for me, for my gear rentals, my food, my drinks, and for a hotel room for at least 3 nights....DAMN, dude!!! We're going to have so much fun, snowboarding, relaxing inside, drinking champagne, "hanging out at the lodge"....oh jeez I can't wait!

I can't even tell you how good you look!!! Interesting that you still have fat days....when the FUCK do those go away There's no hope I see.....I guess we all have those WHACK ASS MIRROR DAYS!!!

Le sigh!

PZ really sounds so much like my bf to me more and more....I got LAVISHED WITH COMPLIMENTS and GREAT SEX TOO thanks to my new slimmer curves!!

FUCK YEAH! S'whadd I'm talkin' bout!

did I tell you I quit for another 30 days......I'm on day 8 today!!! PSH!!!! EASY!!! HEHEH!!! Do it once, you can DO IT AGAIN!!! That's life baby!!! I miss you woman!!!!
[/I][/B]

WOW!! Good job! I think I need to do that again....Love ya!

 

[Curvie Girlie]

Yesterday I ate a DELICIOUS pecan, pear, and balsamic vinaigrette salad for lunch and felt a lot better, for the very IDEA of it and the actual nutrition. I have been SLACKING on fresh salads, fresh fruit, (I had an orange yesterday, too), and non-frozen veggies. I'm going to make a point of it to cook more.

Delena took it easier on us than usual in Yoga 2-3 Ashtanga Vinyasa. We did more seated, deep-stretching poses than standing, sweating, strengthening poses. That is FINE as far as I'm concerned. I realized that I need to be doing more Yoga at home--especially the postures at which I'm not particularly good. Also, I need to work on staying in headstands longer, staying in full backbend longer and trying to get one leg straight up in the air at the same time, doing handstands without a wall, and more deep-stretching poses. This basically means I have to go straight home more often instead of stopping by Chris's house so I can get to sleep earlier and practice at 6am.......hmmm, but he's dying and has no other friends......I have the rest of my life to get better at Yoga. Well, maybe I won't just go to his house EVERYNIGHT I'm not at my boyfriend's.....

PZ is still snowboarding, and should be coming back tomorrow I miss him more, now, than ever. Yes, I think I *gulp* love him But I'm still too shy to tell him, even though the Boulder Creek church's sign said last week:

NEVER MISS AN OPPORTUNITY
TO TELL SOMEONE
YOU LOVE THEM​

Boy that screwed with my head everytime I drove by! LOL! But still, fucker hasn't said it to me first, so HAHA! THIS week the B.C. church's sign is pretty cute:

THINK BIG
BUT RELISH THE LITTLE THINGS​

Word.

Chris: is fucking amazing! He says I AM LITERALLY KEEPING HIM ALIVE. In recent MRIs, his brain's "white matter", which had been deteriorating, has slowed its decay since I've been hanging out with him more. His bone density (and this is UNBELIEVABLE) has gone from 40% of normal since before I was making him eat more, and more nutritious foods, and rock climbing with him, to muthafuckin' 82% of normal!!! This is nothing short of a miracle. SO I definitely want to keep hanging out with him as often as I can. Still, a few weeks ago he lost his heart medication and didn't care until I yelled at him, then he got a prescription filled early and got back on it---then suffered atrial fibrulations. Uh.....my grandma DIED of A Fibs, so it freaked me the fuck out when he called me Sunday night to let me know that he was having them and if he's dead the next day, that's the reason. Le sigh! See what I have to go through? HA! It's worse for him, but yes, disease affects everyone involved. I know I will never have diabetes like HE does (his is one of the most bizarre and worst cases in the world), but I swear, his condition reminds me that every health and food choice I make has an impact, in a way.

Acroyoga was FUN! I'm getting better, I was working with a girl my age and size, who is also an aerial dancer, and last week me and her did OK, although I was less stable as a base, and too tense as a flyer a few times. This week, we worked beautifully together!!! I was stable as a rock when I flew her on my feet, and I relaxed into it when she had ME in the air. The sad thing is this: I won't be able to go to Monday night Acroyoga for 7 weeks.......BECAUSE CRYSTAL SILMI'S BEGINNER-INTENSIVE 7 WEEK BELLY DANCING COURSE STARTS NEXT MONDAY!!!! YAY!

SO my schedule is gonna be like this:

Mondays: 5:30-7pm: Yoga 2-3 with Delena at the Ashtanga Yoga Institute; 7:30-8:30pm: Belly Dancer's Intensive 7 week course with Crystal Silmi

Tuesdays: 6-7pm: Ongoing choreography belly dancing with Rebekah; 7:30-9pm Yoga 1-2 with Delena at the A.Y.I. or Yoga 2-3 with Paige at the rock climbing gym (Paige told me about it but I haven't gone yet and I might go tonight; it's intense Ashtanga Vinyasa and she heats the room to 85 degrees!)

Wednesdays: 6:30-7:15: Weight training at my only gym at this time, the rock climbing one, with workouts given to me by Steve; 7:30-9pm Yoga 1-2 with Mangala or Eric (if she's busy with a patient, she's a nurse) or Acroyoga at the Vet's Hall in Santa Cruz, I haven't been yet (I would be paying drop in fees of $12 a pop) but if I start to miss Acroyoga a lot I'll go.

Thursdays: 6-7pm: Rock climbing (big wall or bouldering) with Chris; 7:30-9pm: Yoga 2 with Delena

These are set in stone. Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays vary greatly. Some weeks I don't formally exercise on any of these days! But ideally:

Fridays: 12:15pm to 1:30: Yoga 2 with Kelly on my lunchbreak; dancing in the night.

Saturdays: REST days but I work at the winery, on my feet from noon to 5 so it never FEELS like total rest; then again I usually eat more on this day.

Sundays: 10:30am-noon: Yoga 2 with Kelly; I'd LIKE to go to "Thai & Fly" at 6pm at the rock climbing gym (Acroyoga, but an emphasis on Thai massage and stretching out in the air on someone's feet) but it has never happend. I'm usually exhausted and hanging out with PZ (sometimes we hike in the forest in the day) or out of town.

OK! I need to get back to work, but I'll try to be around today....

HUGS!