I spoke too soon!
about the lack of drama, etc. Perhaps I was bored? I think I just wanted to get it out of the way!
Subject: The Ex.
Lawrd have mercy on us all!
Last week or whatever, he contacted me out of the blue. Mind you we had dated for a little over 2 years, and been through a bunch of shit. All other BFs I had, never brought out in me what he brought out. And I was his longest relationship
he ever had--we'd lived together for a year and a half. You don't want to know any other details!
Anyway, he has a girlfriend whom he met online and who I THINK lives in Michigan. I don't know anything for certain other than what he's been telling me in his emails lately. And I've been polite and friendly because that's the Buddhist way. Besides, I loved him more than any other man in my life, and although I've forgotten a lot of shit ("blessed are the forgetful, for they are 'done' with their stupidities as well") I DO still wish him well. Anyway, his emails NEVER mentioned her, whom her references as "Ms. Carmen" for whatever reason. They apparently have still been dating since June because today I said, in reference to allowing him to buy me a pint at the Boulder Creek Brewery this Sunday,
HOWEVER if it makes your beezy uncomfortable, then I don't want to be responsible for any drama. You seem to be in a place in life where having a mad girlfriend is the last thing you need--and I understand and appreciate your gratefulness for the AAA. Just make sure if an encounter is worth it to you. If so, it would be nice to see you : ) If not, no worries, I'd rather know you were happy and not see you than see you and find out you got in trouble on account of me! That's my word!
This is all well and true. It
would be nice to see him, so I could see him when I'm expecting it and to break the tension of worrying about running into him unexpectedly. He said,
let me worry bout that, ok?
and if you really wanna screw up my life, just tell ms. carmen all about it (but like, really.... dont!)
SO I was like Uh oh, RED FLAG
SO I said,
Are you SURE you want to interact with me? Because if she really feels so strongly about this, wouldn't you rather respect her feelings? I GET that you are thankful I paid for AAA for you--I'm not asking for anything in return. Really! And like I said, I'm happy doing my thang and being me, with fond memories of my past relationships to temper my current choices--I didn't even speak to or see Lucas [my ex ex BF] for SEVEN YEARS and we're on cool terms, now (although we don't really hang out much). So if "ms. carmen" as you call her, is so vehement about us interacting, then why bother?
This is smart enough. What I probably REALLY said would be to fuck off, because the next thing that came up was
there is that, but really it comes down to what i will and will not allow someone else to dictate about my life.
yeah i had promised her i wasn't going to see you anymore.
here - in the interest of making good on that pint AND making due consideration for carmens feelings, im gonna paypal you 6 bucks
HAHA! I told him to forgeddaboutit. Seriously, that man has not stuck to his word plenty of times, and in weird incidences where it doesn't matter, he all of a sudden wants to. This was very congruent with his attitude/behavior:
and as for carmens feelings on this, she really needs to think about whats worth going nuts about and get over it. she's said as much herself.
I figured he'd be living out his dream, dating a beautiful teenager (she turned 19 days before I turned 26) who's into the same shit he is, long distance or otherwise. Nope! His emails gave no indication that his beezy has lightened his life in the slightest. I believe he was not mentioning her to me purposely, but the fact that he told me he's been BLAH and not doing very well makes me think that he is just that type of person, one prone to his own emotional downfall. And to think he was influencing my own!
) I would also love to go to Australia, however, my priorities would be somewhat different form yours...
I just LOVE him 
Great workouts from that guy, love my gym. Anyway, then I went to Yoga 2 with Delana and she kicked my ass, too! We were doing what you might call "side plank" and then back into "front plank" and down into a Vinyasa and back up without resting in downward dog 
Hahaha! I'm a scary monster 
....Glad he isn't influencing ya any longer!!
