Confessions of a food Junkie

well that's figurative food for the thought Mal lol.

My mom is soooo negative. She is also 300+ lbs and when I mentioned the waitressing, she automatically told me to not bother because they won't hire a "fat" waitress. She said stick to the cashier job.

It didn't hurt my feelings at all because I know what she said has more to do with her insecurities than mine and I think she just wants to protect me from other people who might be mean to me or disappoint me.

I am still going to go apply tonight and I am going to be fearless. I am a confindent,intelligent, capable young woman HEAR ME ROAR!
 
RAWR!!!!!

Good for you!!!

What's the worst thing that could happen? Youdon't get the job, the earth will not swallow you up.... the time space continium won't deflate... and you might even get the job...

You go get 'em tiger :) you can do whatever you put your mind too..
 
Thanks Mal,

I'm really starting to have that attitude too. I've done a lot of soul searching these past few weeks and I've learned a few things about myself.

Some people lose weight because they don't like who they are. That isn't my truth. I truely love me for me, no matter what and it's because I love myself that I want to be my own best friend and make sure I live a long healthy life.

Being skinny will not make me nicer or a better person. I don't care if more people like me because I am skinnier, because those people are't the type of friends I wanted to have in the first place.

Being skinny won't make me smarter or a better citizen.

Being skinnny won't make me a better teacher. It may help me to become more capable of certain mobility and being able to do some coaching, but the children will receive my spirt above all else.


I've really realized this time around that I need to know who I am and love myself to be truely sucessful!
 
Miss_Kallie said:
Being skinnny won't make me a better teacher. It may help me to become more capable of certain mobility and being able to do some coaching, but the children will receive my spirt above all else.


I've really realized this time around that I need to know who I am and love myself to be truely sucessful!
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You really have done some soul searching. I think that is a wonderful state of mind you are in.

I'm a teacher too. Love teaching those expanding little minds. No matter what size you are if your a good teacher, your a good teacher!
 
MK, thanks for stopping by my place! :D I was just cathing up on your diary! You've done a great job! You have a great attitude, don't let anybody, including family, adjust it! You're right in your mother most likely voicing HER insecurities. Don't take it personally and dont let it get ya down! There is no reason you shouldn't apply for the waitressing job! There are people who will be mean -it even happens ifyou're skinny (just ask my sister). Its just how some people are and there isn't much to be done about it but to lean on the support you get from those around you. You can't change mean people unfortunatey :eek:

SO proud of you for what you've accomplished! Keep up the great work! :D
 
Mal ~ That is exactly my attitude is. So what if I don't get the job? I for sure won't get it if I don't apply.

Jen, AC, BB ~ Thank you so much for the kind words. This exactly why I found this forum. I don't really have supportive, positive people in my life right now so I am soooooooooooo greatful for you all because it means the world to me!



OK....IT's confession time :( Daily food intake for today.


Breakfast:

3/4 whole grain bagel @ 280 cals
1 and 3/4 tsps of S.L. Cream cheese @ 60 cals
16 oz of water @ 0 cals
340 calories

A.M. Snack:

1 low fat yogurt cup @ 40 cals
16 oz of water @ 0 cals
40 calories

Lunch:

4 cups of Romaine Lettus @ 22 cals
3/4 cup of chopped sweet red peppers @ 30 cals
120 grams of chucked light tuna in water @ 120 cals
2 tsps of F.F. Italian dressing @ 10 cals
16 oz of water @ 0 cals
182 calories

P.M. Snack:

8:eek: cups of (homemade) airpoped popcorn @ 240 cals
2 tsps of melted becel @ 70 cals
1 tsp of Kernals salt n' vinegar flavoring@ 13 cals
323 calories

Supper:

1 whopper sandwhich minus the mayo and ketchup @ 495 cals
mozza sticks @ 290 cals
785 calories :(

DAILY TOTAL:1670


Notes: OK so I'm still working on my 32 oz of water to make my quota for the day. As for the pop corn today, well I ate too much of it and made my tummy hurt (it used to be my favorite and I could eat that much at a time no problem...not anymore.) and then my power went off at about 5 something and didn't come back on until about 5 after 10 so I had no way of making supper, so that is why we had fast food. I'm sad because if I had gone without today, it would have been my 9th day straight without fastfood and now I have to restart my count. I feel sad and it totally wasn't worth it, although I tried to make better choices by eliminating the mayo and ketchup.

Again no walk tonight, but while the power was off, Telaryn and I were outside the whole time. I pushed him on the swing and I was lifting him up and down and all around, so I wasn't just sitting around today, so that's better than nothing.

Now that I figured out why I was feeling screwed up, I can fix that and get back to normal *YASSSS* Thanks all for reading. I need a smack from T2 or Twinny please. I need some tough love to get me back on track. Thanks.
 
My Schedual for tomorrow:

8:30am -Wake up and eat breakfast
9:00am - get ready
9:30am - take son to daycare
10:00am - snack
10:10am - Go for walk
11:00am - come home start lunch/supper/ house work
12:30pm - Lunch
1:00pm - housework and some comp time
between 3 and 4pm - go pick up son from daycare and then go to park
5:30pm - start the rest of supper
6:30pm - me and son eat supper (daddy is working over time this week)
7:45pm - Hubby gets home from work
8:00pm - go for evening walk by myself
10:00pm - bedtime


OK my goals of tomorrow are:

1. Get back on track. Shake these past few days off.
2. Eat meals as planned.
3. Pack lunch and snacks if I'm going to be out.
4. DRINK atleast 80 oz of water.
5. Go for 2 walks to make up for the last couple days.
6. Avoid the scale
7. NO BINGING!
8. Get to bed earlier
 
Miss kallie..... how ya been? OK well the calories aren't too bad depending on how many you are shooting for on a daily basis. The whopper well... it will take awhile till you quit craving things like that. A little real food once in awhile lets you know your still alive. Saturday is my cheat day so I cant say thats a bad thing. Look you had one whopper instead of going to dairy queen and hitting the super duper large blizzard so in the grand scheme you didn't do bad. Yea it was a high calorie meal but it could have been much worse......
 
WHACK!

Okay, you've been whacked back on the track. :D

I did not know that a Whopper had that many calories. :eek: Okay, next time you have a Whopper, skip the side of sticks and you'll still be having a good calorie day. :D
 
(it used to be my favorite and I could eat that much at a time no problem...not anymore.)
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This part is really cool and i hope you feel how great that is....that means you are ALREADY changing waht your body wants to eat and if what you used to be able to eat is now making you not feel good - that is an accomplishment in itself (not that you want to feel yucky but it teaches you to go for more healhty foods, or smaller portions.

As for yesterdays calories, today is a new day and you got your double WHACKS so one day isnt going to ruin all your hard work. Look forward and keep working at it....good job on no mayo on the whopper and yes, ideally skip the sticks (but i think you already know that).

have a great day!
 
The popcorn thing is just a reminder of how sucessful you are being, just think before you could eat it all and now you are full it shows your body s ecognising the smaller portions and accepting them as the norm! Hope you are having a good day and are sucessful getting back on track!
 
I like your attitude- and I love how honest you are on this forum about your good days, your bad days, and your thoughts in general. The goals you set for yourself are pretty amazing. :)

As far as your list of all the things that being skinny won't do for you...you have a good point. In retrospect, if I think back to the last time I was really happy with my body, I was kind of mean! I hope I can lose the weight this time and not get the stinky ego.
 
Miss_Kallie, don't beat yourself up it takes more than one boo boo to mess up a healthy diet . If you eliminate something from your diet like one fruit or a piece of bread for one day it will balance you off. We all slip a little and back slide but we are human and we just get right back on track and continue on. If I could give a little advice when ever you are unable to eat at home and need to eat out the best choice is a salad with fat free or low fat dressing or a grill chicken sandwich. Good success :D
 
*DOES HAPPY DANCE*​


OK, I just got back from my first 2 mile walk!!!!!!!!!!!! It took me 43 minutes and that was at a very comfortable pace. I am all sweaty and I love it. I feel really good.

*light bulb comes on* Hey this makes me feel better than anything (well almost everything ;) ) and it feels like a reward...I know...everytime I do something good I should go for a 1 mile walk and then that would be a good thing so I'd have to do another mile....man this is awesome.

And I owe this in part to the twinny stick operators and my supporters. Thanks guys.
 
you should start keeping track of all the miles you're walking and figure out where to walk to... :) good job on adding two miles :)
 
Whew, there's a whole lot of whacking going on in this diary!!!! Is it safe to come in?

Two miles? Girl, did you say two miles? That is AWESOME!!!!!! So happy for you.

And after reading your soul searching post I have to say you have a good head on your shoulders. Your post reflects not only a wisdom beyond your years but a very intelligent comprehension that kindness and love for yourself is paramount to a happy existence. Some people leave this earth never ever having that kind of understanding. And you've nailed it at a such a young age. Bravo, darlin'!!!!
 
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