BikiniBound's Diary

[Boam46]

I feel you about the H problems, I'm going through similar issues except I'm not the counseling type myself so we dont have that issue to contend with (and he would NEVER EVER agree to this either). It absolutely sucks having that antipathy with someone you live with. But surprisingly we did have some hot sex last night LOL after he finally slept in the bed after being in the LR for the past 2 weeks. Of course I was too pissed at first but it turned out well I must say. Sorry for the rant!

Yay! for hot sex

I was wondering, and you are just the person to ask based on your summary of your program in your HT thread, how do I get my eating under control? I've managed to maintain a reasonable weight (except when I got pregnant and gained more than usual) or 10 pounds beyond, but I've never gone off the deep end so I guess I'm ahead of the game in one sense. But on the other side of it, I just wonder how someone who does enable a large weight gain, then go and somehow harness the discipline and will power to eat 1200-1500 calories a day? There are so many of you on here! You'd think someone who's managed to stay moderately within control (it has been a STRUGGLE to maintain) could get 10 pounds off! But no, I can't stay in control more than a few days without caving. How do you do it? How did you change to the degree that you have?

I know you didn't ask me but I hope you don't mind me putting my two cents in also. For me it was a breaking point. It was a mental thing where I said I am and have to do this now or I will never reign in control. Since that day I have no cheated on my "diet" not even a diet i'm just eating everything as healthy as possible.

I am never hungry now and it amazes me. I just eat throughout the day 4-6 times depending on how hungry I am. Another huge part for me was realizing what feeling full and what hunger was. I used to just eat all the time... totally past the point of full and not when I was hungry.

Its not to say I'm never going to eat any of my favorite foods again ... I will at some point decide I can allow myself to eat things in moderation but until then it was a mental break where I took control.

Sorry its not an exact plan =0/

 

[Boam46]

I'm sure I'll get him to go to at least one session. Hopefully he'll see how much it means to you and your very serious about this through one session.

We'll see how it goes from there. But if he won't continue, than it's over, and I will know that at least I tried. He just has a big issue about talking to others about his relationships, and he doens't put much stock in therapy or counselling. He thinks people should just deal with their problems on their own. I completely disagree, but we'll see how it goes. I am not afraid to be single again.

I'm a psychology major and I don't put a ton of stock in counseling and therapy but it can and is very helpful. Of course you also have to deal with their problems on their own. Its only effective when both are done. Its great that your standing strong for your feelings and your wants and needs.

 

[Blancita]

Thanks for your input BB and Boam . I really admire your determination and drive to get healthy. I am totally routing for you!! Now that I think of it, my motivation was a lot stronger when I felt really overweight and I was just desperate to get it off before the summer (though I still ate out of plan plenty more than you all ever do). Now I'm passably OK (even feel sexy *sometimes*), so its hard to keep up the motivation. But it HAS to be kept up because I've already gained back about 3 pounds that I've lost. Clearly I must remain ever vigilant. Wondaful .

 

[bikinibound]

Thanks for your input BB and Boam . I really admire your determination and drive to get healthy. I am totally routing for you!! Now that I think of it, my motivation was a lot stronger when I felt really overweight and I was just desperate to get it off before the summer (though I still ate out of plan plenty more than you all ever do). Now I'm passably OK (even feel sexy *sometimes*), so its hard to keep up the motivation. But it HAS to be kept up because I've already gained back about 3 pounds that I've lost. Clearly I must remain ever vigilant. Wondaful .

i think the trick is that if you're going to eat "out of plan" that you do it in moderation. Then it's not so bad, and you don't feel like you fell off the wagon. Like I said, don't eat the whole pint of ben and jerry's, just have a spoonful. Some people can't do that, but it works for me. I just get a spoonful, put the lid back on the ice cream and put in freezer. I stand in kitchen and eat my spoonful. I never take the whole pint into another room of the house, and I certainly don't sit down with it! lol Then it's all over. And most importantly, don't let yourself make excuses. Oh, I'm just gonna eat this massive bowl of pasta. I worked out today so it's ok. I'll be good tomorrow. NO EXCUSES!!

 

[bikinibound]

I know you didn't ask me but I hope you don't mind me putting my two cents in also. For me it was a breaking point. It was a mental thing where I said I am and have to do this now or I will never reign in control. Since that day I have no cheated on my "diet" not even a diet i'm just eating everything as healthy as possible.

I am never hungry now and it amazes me. I just eat throughout the day 4-6 times depending on how hungry I am. Another huge part for me was realizing what feeling full and what hunger was. I used to just eat all the time... totally past the point of full and not when I was hungry.

Its not to say I'm never going to eat any of my favorite foods again ... I will at some point decide I can allow myself to eat things in moderation but until then it was a mental break where I took control.

Sorry its not an exact plan =0/

How dare you post your opinion on MY diary!! Just Kidding! I cheat more than you do, Jenna, but like I said, I do it in moderation.

 

[bikinibound]

I'm a psychology major and I don't put a ton of stock in counseling and therapy but it can and is very helpful. Of course you also have to deal with their problems on their own. Its only effective when both are done. Its great that your standing strong for your feelings and your wants and needs.

Well, I know several people who have had marriage counselling who say it saved their marriage. I have a lot of issues that need to be discussed, but my H and I are not good at discussing those sort of issues on our own. Things tend to get ugly--especially when my H brushes them off. I can't explain it, but I know that counselling will be very helpful. I just know it.

 

[Boam46]

How dare you post your opinion on MY diary!! Just Kidding! I cheat more than you do, Jenna, but like I said, I do it in moderation.

Damn me and my opinions ... I think its awesome you can cheat in moderation and stya on track... I don't think I could do it

Well, I know several people who have had marriage counselling who say it saved their marriage. I have a lot of issues that need to be discussed, but my H and I are not good at discussing those sort of issues on our own. Things tend to get ugly--especially when my H brushes them off. I can't explain it, but I know that counselling will be very helpful. I just know it.

It most certainly can be helpful I really hope it is for you either to fix problems or bring closure... which every is going to be better for you

 

[Blancita]

i think the trick is that if you're going to eat "out of plan" that you do it in moderation. Then it's not so bad, and you don't feel like you fell off the wagon. Like I said, don't eat the whole pint of ben and jerry's, just have a spoonful. Some people can't do that, but it works for me. I just get a spoonful, put the lid back on the ice cream and put in freezer. I stand in kitchen and eat my spoonful. I never take the whole pint into another room of the house, and I certainly don't sit down with it! lol Then it's all over. And most importantly, don't let yourself make excuses. Oh, I'm just gonna eat this massive bowl of pasta. I worked out today so it's ok. I'll be good tomorrow. NO EXCUSES!!

Luckily my binges have never been so bad that I end up eating the whole pint. But I do eat a lot, sometimes constantly, throughout the day on weekends. It seems no matter what plans I make, I only stick to them if I really feel like it. I dont tend to eat less because of will power or anything, just if I'm not that hungry or dont have the munchies (I usually eat a lot for up to 2 days then get very full and lose interest for 1 to 3 days). I've really got to work on the discipline. I dont make excuses such as I've worked out a lot though, because I know too much about calories burned and eaten to fool myself. That's one thing I dont do is fool myself.

Sometimes tracking someone else's discipline and motivation helps .

 

[Blancita]

Well, I know several people who have had marriage counselling who say it saved their marriage. I have a lot of issues that need to be discussed, but my H and I are not good at discussing those sort of issues on our own. Things tend to get ugly--especially when my H brushes them off. I can't explain it, but I know that counselling will be very helpful. I just know it.

Men do tend to be very resistant to anything related to talking about problems and issues. It just sucks and is so demoralizing when you're not getting along with your "loved one". I hope he agrees to at least give it a try!

 

[bikinibound]

Luckily my binges have never been so bad that I end up eating the whole pint. But I do eat a lot, sometimes constantly, throughout the day on weekends. It seems no matter what plans I make, I only stick to them if I really feel like it. I dont tend to eat less because of will power or anything, just if I'm not that hungry or dont have the munchies (I usually eat a lot for up to 2 days then get very full and lose interest for 1 to 3 days). I've really got to work on the discipline. I dont make excuses such as I've worked out a lot though, because I know too much about calories burned and eaten to fool myself. That's one thing I dont do is fool myself.

Sometimes tracking someone else's discipline and motivation helps .

I think you've answered your own question. You simply have lost your motivation and discipline. You would rather eat what you want than lose the last 10lbs. Until you decide that you'd rather lose the last 10lbs than eat what you want, you won't. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I know from personal experience that it's true.

 

[Blancita]

That is quite true. I really need to keep that in mind more often.

How did you do today?

 

[bikinibound]

Men do tend to be very resistant to anything related to talking about problems and issues. It just sucks and is so demoralizing when you're not getting along with your "loved one". I hope he agrees to at least give it a try!

Yes, men do tend to have a difficult time talking about their feelings. I think part of it is the y chromosome, but I think it's also due to most men being socialized from a very young age to keep it all inside, that talking about your feelings is for sissies and girls. That is very hard to overcome--similar to women with self-esteem issues in that once you've had something pounded into your head for so long, it's hard to change.

 

[bikinibound]

Exercise for the Week:
8/13--40min of circuit training

Food for Today:
meal#1--strawberries and cottage cheese
meal#2--the last of the shrimp/veggie stirfry
meal#3--2 ryecrisp crackers with onion and chives cream cheese
meal#4--low-carb protein shake
meal#5--chicken breast with green beans and cheese
meal#6--2tbsp of ice cream (couldn't resist a little)

Well, aside from the bit of ice cream, I did pretty well today. Was down to 238 this am, so that is down from the 240.5 of the day before, and only .5lbs from my lowest last week. I am feeling really good about tomorrow's weigh in. I think I'll be below 237. Don't know why, just have a good feeling about it.

Thinking about wearing a miniskirt to the airport tomorrow night--a little something sexy for my H. Haven't worn a mini skirt in years!! If I do, I'll be slathering the fake tan crap on my white as a ghost legs..lmbo
That'll make them look thinner..lol

Well, hubby's plane is in the air. I'm curious to see how he acts when he gets here. Hope he's ready to get his ass in gear. And if not, oh well. I am at the point where i really don't care. If we stay together, fine. If we don't, fine. I just want to know, either way.

 

[Boam46]

Exercise for the Week:
8/13--40min of circuit training

Food for Today:
meal#1--strawberries and cottage cheese
meal#2--the last of the shrimp/veggie stirfry
meal#3--2 ryecrisp crackers with onion and chives cream cheese
meal#4--low-carb protein shake
meal#5--chicken breast with green beans and cheese
meal#6--2tbsp of ice cream (couldn't resist a little)

Your food looks awesome even with the little bit of ice cream!

Well, aside from the bit of ice cream, I did pretty well today. Was down to 238 this am, so that is down from the 240.5 of the day before, and only .5lbs from my lowest last week. I am feeling really good about tomorrow's weigh in. I think I'll be below 237. Don't know why, just have a good feeling about it.

I think you will be too

Thinking about wearing a miniskirt to the airport tomorrow night--a little something sexy for my H. Haven't worn a mini skirt in years!! If I do, I'll be slathering the fake tan crap on my white as a ghost legs..lmbo
That'll make them look thinner..lol

I want pics if you do!!!!

Well, hubby's plane is in the air. I'm curious to see how he acts when he gets here. Hope he's ready to get his ass in gear. And if not, oh well. I am at the point where i really don't care. If we stay together, fine. If we don't, fine. I just want to know, either way.

I want whatever is going to make you happy in the end... because you deserve nothing less than pure happiness

 

[MsGhettoBooty]

Exercise for the Week:
8/13--40min of circuit training

Food for Today:
meal#1--strawberries and cottage cheese
meal#2--the last of the shrimp/veggie stirfry
meal#3--2 ryecrisp crackers with onion and chives cream cheese
meal#4--low-carb protein shake
meal#5--chicken breast with green beans and cheese
meal#6--2tbsp of ice cream (couldn't resist a little)

Well, aside from the bit of ice cream, I did pretty well today. Was down to 238 this am, so that is down from the 240.5 of the day before, and only .5lbs from my lowest last week. I am feeling really good about tomorrow's weigh in. I think I'll be below 237. Don't know why, just have a good feeling about it.

Thinking about wearing a miniskirt to the airport tomorrow night--a little something sexy for my H. Haven't worn a mini skirt in years!! If I do, I'll be slathering the fake tan crap on my white as a ghost legs..lmbo
That'll make them look thinner..lol

Well, hubby's plane is in the air. I'm curious to see how he acts when he gets here. Hope he's ready to get his ass in gear. And if not, oh well. I am at the point where i really don't care. If we stay together, fine. If we don't, fine. I just want to know, either way.

As always... the workout and food looks great, honey! Also, I'm really hoping your weigh in will go well. If it's below 237 I'll make sure to do the robo-cop and the running man to celebrate your accomplishment. haha!

Hmmmm miniskirt and fake tan crap, eh? Sounds like a party. If that doesn't get his pecker a jumpin', then I don't know what will, doll. LMAO! I'm wishing you the best with the H, hun. Let us know how things go.... also, what's up with jenna and wanting pix of you in a miniskirt. I knew she was a lezzy! Girls that hot usually are! (By the way, Jenna... my Temporary Lesbian Days are Wednesday. LMAO!!!!!!) Love you both...

-Sheryl

 

[SoSel]

Good luck with everything dear. I'll be thinking of ya and I have my fingers crossed. :hugs:

 

[MidGaGuy]

Drops by to leave you some and some on your butt cuz I think you like that stuff

Hope everything goes well for you .

 

[Boam46]

also, what's up with jenna and wanting pix of you in a miniskirt. I knew she was a lezzy! Girls that hot usually are! (By the way, Jenna... my Temporary Lesbian Days are Wednesday. LMAO!!!!!!) Love you both...

I'm no Lezzie.... but I can tell when a girl is hott So what"s wrong with lookin

Good luck on your weigh in today... I've got my fingers crossed... I'm sure you're going to do friggin awesome!

 

[ellebelle1]

Good luck on your weigh in, Kimberly!
I'm sure you'll do great!
xoxo

 

[bikinibound]

So lesbian day is tomorrow, huh? I'd better stay away from Jenna!

Paul--Now why would you think I like a little ? lmbo I don't know what would give you that impression. I've always thought of myself as a perfect !!!!

Well the weigh-in--which is a dailiy occurance, so it's not a huge deal. However, I was slightly annoyed that it said 237.5. So nothing has changed except that I've lost the last .5lb that I gained last week. Grr...So I guess that is so-so news. I'm back to where I started.

I've been quite devoted today. I was the devoted granddaughter and took my grandma to lunch and her weekly hair appointment (one of the few priviledges of being an old lady). Then I've been the devoted daughter, doing craploads of my parents' laundry b/d my mother can't go up and down the basement stairs. And the devoted wife cleaning the house so that my neatfreak husband won't get the shits when he walks through the door...

He called me from L.A. earlier. He was nice, and we had a nice conversation like our last one never happened. Aagghh!

Well, I've got five hours of freedom left..lol And I still haven't decided what I'm gonna wear to the airport. I just don't have that many sexy clothes that I can fit into. Once I started putting on weight, everything I bought was loose and baggy to hide the fat--ha! Like that really works..lmbo. So I don't really have any hoochy mama clothes that fit. I am soo not a fashionista. Maybe I'll just show up in sweats! haha