Before/Inbetween/Almost After - Pooh Style

Hey!!! :)

Missed you too ~ congrats on the pizza bar success...I was whining lately about my craving chocolate and other things bad for you...I am glad to see you resisted.

Have you ever had tomato pie? It is basically thiin crust pizza w/o cheese, only a little garlic and parmeasean sprinkled on top...so yummy and less cals than regular pizza.

I don't know about the creme v lotion but logic tells me that the creme may be better as it is thicker...who knows...if we can ever dig up Keith (shame on him for actually working, hehe) he'll probably have the answer...he is smart like that :D

LoL... sorry, taking care of a certification teaching issue or something. I use the Creme... but your YMMV... I personally don't even know if that will work, but I hope it does ;)

PIZZA, haven't had it in weeks. Usually have it once a week as a treat... going through withdrawal.
 
LoL... sorry, taking care of a certification teaching issue or something. I use the Creme... but your YMMV... I personally don't even know if that will work, but I hope it does ;)

PIZZA, haven't had it in weeks. Usually have it once a week as a treat... going through withdrawal.

Pizza is the one thing that I let myself have, usually only one slice, but it makes me feel like I am having 'something'.

Keith, how many times do I have to tell you that it should be less work, more play??? ;)

Those pesky students will take care of themselves...

hehe, I'm so bad...
 
Had a few of those comments today... like everyday, "It's time you stopped losing weight". Annoying and frustrating, makes me think they might have a point? But, I know I still have that flab and midsection that needs to be trimmed... thats the battle of thoughts in my head constantly.

I know exactly what you mean my mother of allpeople says that I have lost enough weight and htat I need to stop she has even started saying that My neck is hanging and that I am looking anorexic and I am 170lbs from 220 I still think that I need to loose another 25-30 lbs and she keeps telling me to stop I really does a number on you brain
 
I know exactly what you mean my mother of allpeople says that I have lost enough weight and htat I need to stop she has even started saying that My neck is hanging and that I am looking anorexic and I am 170lbs from 220 I still think that I need to loose another 25-30 lbs and she keeps telling me to stop I really does a number on you brain

I guess that's pretty common, aye? My family is the same way... It's like, wtf?
 
I guess that's pretty common, aye? My family is the same way... It's like, wtf?


I have one better...I am thinking about a TT after due to a lot of excess skin and my mom said to me, well what are you going to do after that to make sure you don't gain the weight back?

Um, I don't know, maybe the same thing I did to lose it in the first place?

Families are SUCH fun...
 
Tell me about it. My mom is the same way. She doesn't understand why I can't just *STOP* losing weight. Primarily it isn't that she thinks I'm *too* thin, it's because she doesn't like spending money on clothes I only wear for a month before they're too big. I found this out Tuesday night. She was trying to make me promise that I would maintain where I am and I told her I'd like to, but I couldn't. Needless to say, I'll be buying my own clothes from now on. I really don't have too much further to go, but I like to invest in a couple pairs of sexy, skinny jeans everytime I hit a milestone. It just makes it all feel worth it.

This being said about my family, it's friends really who tend to annoy me more. I'm always getting "What? Why are you watching your weight?" "Why on earth do you run so much?" and/or "Don't you think you're thin enough?"

I'm telling you, these people have NO IDEA what it's like, at all. They're all NATURALLY thin. I'd like to say I can understand where they're coming from, but I can't, at all, in the same ways they can't understand how their comments annoy and frustrate me.

In fact, I was thinking about all of this yesterday. You know, spectators on the street will take one look at me, and NONE of them would guess that I've lost 140 pounds and that I have weight issues. All they'll see is a size 8 chic with curly hair. They'd have NO IDEA what I'm *really* feeling and the absolute and total *hell* I went through to accomplish all I have in the past three years. I'm glad they don't have to familiarize with it, actually. I wouldn't wish weight issues on my worst enemy. If there's anything that can chop someone down to size, it's the repugnance they feel toward their own personal appearance.

I've admitted to a friend, that regardless of my current size, I have and most probably always will have issues with my self-esteem and confidence. A person who's my size naturally, who has been all of thier life, would have the self-esteem and confidence of Donald Trump, but for me, it's not so.

Recently actually, I had a situation where I broke my friend's bed, and his brother innocently jokes that I must be too fat for it. (Of course, on multiple occasions he's called me rather thin, so I *know* he's joking around) but his joke would be taken differently, internally, to a naturally thin person that it did to me. I know he didn't mean anything by it and he certainly doesn't view me as 'fat', but my past dominates how I process comments and looks. When he said it, it was completely harmless, but inside, I was honestly questioning if he *does* think I'm still overweight. After pondering it, I realized my doubt was bogus, but still...it bothered me.

I believe all of our pasts, all of our troubles and hells, royally dominate how we percieve other people to see us. I will most probably always think I'm fat. Not to the point of being aneorexic of course, but I will probably never ACCEPT that I'm as thin as I am. Why? Because I don't know what it feels like to be thin. I don't know how to process it internally. I don't know *how* to be skinny. I don't know what to *think* about being skinny and more than anything, I don't know how to reveal the innately confident side of my character. She's in there somewhere. I know she is.

Okay, sorry, diatribe over. LOL....
 
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***2 week update***

Before that though, I love Rae's comment above: "I don't know *how* to be skinny."

Classic, thanks for sharing that and making me realize I am not alone in that battle...

So, I am currently at 179 and no changes in measurements at all, which is weird because I am not sure where that weight came from.

Well, now for the crappy news, yesterday I ate upwards of 3300 calories in one day. No exercise either (not that I would on the weekends). I mean, in the morning I was fine with 550 calories. Then I went to my girlfriend's parent's house and ate a bunch of pizza, hoagies, and cake. I OVERDID it, in the worst way, and paid dearly for it... I felt awful, I mean, my upper rib cage hurt so bad and I just felt lousy. So, I paid the price for that... I am actually happy that my body can't do that anymore (that used to be a usual occurrence for me). I have noticed though that I look leaner today than I did yesterday (I read up on it and it actually made sense, apparently I replenished my glycogen levels and this has this effect).

I now have to make a decision though, do I eat 1500 calories today to offset yesterday (in some minimal way), or do I continue with my plan of increasing until I reach maintenance (then I would go back down to a caloric deficit, I was going to give my body a break for two weeks). If that is the case, I should eat 2200 calories today instead of 2000, then 2400 next Sunday. This is all very confusing right now and there is different literature to explain different things.

I will say that I think my stomach does look leaner (still got that shelf going on) than it did before but the measuring tape says its the same. I wore a medium shirt this weekend out to the bar and I felt VERY odd in it. I felt like my stomach was bulging out despite the constant comments of how great I looked. We are our own worst critics...
 
Keith hon, I love reading your updates. Thanks for coming back to us, bud!

You know, I think it's common for us to feel uncomfortable in smaller clothing despite the fact that we're not bulging out of, and in fact, look rather lean, wearing it. The same goes for me. I too, wear a meduim up top, and I'm constantly pulling it away from my torso out of habit.

Besides, I'm sure you *do* look just fine in your odd feeling medium sized shirt. I am sure however, that it probably would have felt a bit tight after the food rush at your girlfriend's house. I always find my clothes fitting uncomfortably after a mammoth binge. Haha.

I hope you're having a good Monday so far, bud!
 
Hey guys :)

Rae - I totally agree, I don't know how to be skinny either, hell, I don't even see myself that way and am constantly getting yelled at because of it.

I think that if you were/are really heavy the adjustment time to see your new self is fairly long partly because being heavy just isn't about your weight. It is almost a state of mind.

I am wearing XL shirts now which is not unchartered territory for me, but I think if I ever get down to a L, I will be freaked out.

I feel the same way when I overeat, like, why did I do that - I feel like hell now. It is good to know that our bodies, if not our minds, do not like the crap.
 
Besides, I'm sure you *do* look just fine in your odd feeling medium sized shirt. I am sure however, that it probably would have felt a bit tight after the food rush at your girlfriend's house. I always find my clothes fitting uncomfortably after a mammoth binge.

Yep I am doing the "shirt pull" all the time. Old habits die hard.

Hey guys :)

Rae - I totally agree, I don't know how to be skinny either, hell, I don't even see myself that way and am constantly getting yelled at because of it.

I think that if you were/are really heavy the adjustment time to see your new self is fairly long partly because being heavy just isn't about your weight. It is almost a state of mind.

I am wearing XL shirts now which is not unchartered territory for me, but I think if I ever get down to a L, I will be freaked out.

I feel the same way when I overeat, like, why did I do that - I feel like hell now. It is good to know that our bodies, if not our minds, do not like the crap.

I am glad my body hated me for that... it was very reassuring that I have actually chosen a healthy life style. It isn't like when you eat crap all the time and then go eat something healthy and you're body ACHES... so eating crap food in a healthy lifestyle is obviously going to affect me, and I am glad for that mechanism.

I have decided even after my binge that I am going to go to 2200 calories today. Which is going to be interesting considering I've never gotten this high with calories before. I think I will need to take in more almonds (easy 160 calories at a pop, with some good fats in it). Larger portions of chicken for dinner, and perhaps sneak in a subway sandwich during the baseball game after school. This should be interesting... oh, no working out today due to a slight cold.
 
Yep I am doing the "shirt pull" all the time. Old habits die hard.



I am glad my body hated me for that... it was very reassuring that I have actually chosen a healthy life style. It isn't like when you eat crap all the time and then go eat something healthy and you're body ACHES... so eating crap food in a healthy lifestyle is obviously going to affect me, and I am glad for that mechanism.

I have decided even after my binge that I am going to go to 2200 calories today. Which is going to be interesting considering I've never gotten this high with calories before. I think I will need to take in more almonds (easy 160 calories at a pop, with some good fats in it). Larger portions of chicken for dinner, and perhaps sneak in a subway sandwich during the baseball game after school. This should be interesting... oh, no working out today due to a slight cold.


I am forever doing the shirt pull, pants pull, etc, I look like a freak :)

So you are moving towards maintenance in an effort to break a logjam? Or do you feel like you are where you want to be and are moving forward w/the muscle increase?
 
I am forever doing the shirt pull, pants pull, etc, I look like a freak :)

So you are moving towards maintenance in an effort to break a logjam? Or do you feel like you are where you want to be and are moving forward w/the muscle increase?

Great question... because I am not so sure of the answer myself. I actually will still be in a deficit at 2200 and 2400 calories (if I work out, with sedentary life style my BMR is 2400). I think if I move closer to my BMR, it will actually help me still lose weight since I am closing the gap and avoiding that whole starvation mode.

I hope I am still able to lose because I still have some nice fat deposits across my stomach there and need to shrink those up before I can really attempt the muscle increase stage. If I find that I am not losing anything at 2400, I will drop by 20% back down to 2000 and see where that takes me again. I feel my body needs a REST of some sort from a calorie deficit... this is a risky statement because I obviously do not know what my body really needs, I can only assume.
 
Great question... because I am not so sure of the answer myself. I actually will still be in a deficit at 2200 and 2400 calories (if I work out, with sedentary life style my BMR is 2400). I think if I move closer to my BMR, it will actually help me still lose weight since I am closing the gap and avoiding that whole starvation mode.

I hope I am still able to lose because I still have some nice fat deposits across my stomach there and need to shrink those up before I can really attempt the muscle increase stage. If I find that I am not losing anything at 2400, I will drop by 20% back down to 2000 and see where that takes me again. I feel my body needs a REST of some sort from a calorie deficit... this is a risky statement because I obviously do not know what my body really needs, I can only assume.

Interesting...I feel like my loss is slowing down (which is horrible since it was pretty slow to start with) and I am not sure if it is because I am eating too little or too much. Ack.

I don't know how much of a risky statement it is to think you need a rest, you know yourself better than anyone to make that assessment. If it doesn't work, try something else. You have nothing but time sweetie :)
 
Interesting...I feel like my loss is slowing down (which is horrible since it was pretty slow to start with) and I am not sure if it is because I am eating too little or too much. Ack.

I don't know how much of a risky statement it is to think you need a rest, you know yourself better than anyone to make that assessment. If it doesn't work, try something else. You have nothing but time sweetie :)

Sorta... kinda have a specific date I need to maintain a decent goal for, therefore, I have about 2.5 months to really play with. And then about 3.5 months before I am on my trip in Mexico, so then I really really REALLY need to be in better shape.
 
Sort of a fitness resort believe it or not. I am really excited to go workout on my vacation :) Try yoga and spin and all that other alternative stuff... :)

Very cool - I am going to the beach for a week and have to decide if I am going to run the boardwalk or what...I like your idea better :)
 
Well, two week update as usual.

No loss in weight... none. However, that was the actual goal this time.

Instead I lost 1.5 inches off the stomach and hips, which was the goal (preferably the stomach).

I also now wear 32 jeans. Which completely shocked the hell out of me when I tried them on... Not sure if I would do as well in dress slacks... because they tend to run smaller than the jeans. At any rate, quite happy with how the skin around the stomach area is shaping up for now... it appears to be FAT and not LOOSE skin (which I may have some of, but since the fat is sitting in the deposits closest to the skin surface it likes to play that stretch game on me). I am optimistic that I can continue on my clean cut and lose some BF while maintaining LM.
 
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