A new me! (hopefully, with some help)

Kate, I hated when people made such a fuss over how much weight I had lost. I wanted to run & hide. It makes you feel like a freak! The ones who quietly said "Looking good Cate. Well done." that was a different story. They made me feel like a million dollars. You are doing so well sweets. don't let anything or anyone stand in your way, xoxo Cate
 
ARuthie What did Mark say? About my bony body? He is lovely about my weight loss and his way of showing it is kinda bitch about how bony i am cos he knows what i am like with compliments. He is constantly trying to cop a feel and the last few weeks he keeps picking me up!!!! Which is freaky, nice but i'm like 'whoooooo, you'll drop me' but he doesn't.
 
Kate - it must be so difficult for people to strike the right balance of being supportive, but not nagging if you are slipping, at complimenting you without drawing attention to the weight loss all the time and I guess the closer people are to you, the more it can impact you. I agree with Kate - its nice to have outside people notice, especially if they haven't seen you in a while, but if they make a huge fuss it makes me feel really crap about how I must have looked before and that they must have always been thinking I was fat. The nicest thing that was said to me was an old friend who I met for dinner who hadn't seen me since the weight loss and just said "wow, you look gorgeous" and then that was that.
 
We have the same breakfast!! :D except I throw in chopped up banana (love bananas), and 2 tbs of chia seeds, adds more good carbs and good fats from the seeds. But yeah its a awesome breakfast... gives that great energy for the day.
 
ADAY 110

Breakfast: 2 wheatabix
Lunch: Ham, lettuce and light mayo granary sandwich, 97 cal crisps
Dinner: Left over lasagne thing with salad, light salad cream and courgette relish
Snacks: 2 bags of 97 cal crisps, banana and a 110 cal toffee choc bar!!!

Exercise: 20 min walk to the gym and back, 10 min walk, 20 min interval run, 5 mins on the cross trainer at 80 rpm, 3x12 chest press, 100 crunches, 50 bridges, 3x12 tricep extentions, 3x12 bicep curls, 3x12 peck flye and finally 150 reps on the abs machine!!

OMG i have been soooooooooooooooo hungry today!!!!!!!

But i was totally cool about it and actually found it quite funny. I was fine first thing but at coffee break i scoffed my crisps (that i have with my sandwich at lunch) as well as my banana, oh boy, did i scoff them too, i was shoveling them in at about 5 at a time!! I had to go into town at lunch time to get some birthday cards and rammed my sandwich in before i went, in about 3 seconds flat!! While i was up town i bought another 2 bags of my 97 cal teddy bear crisps, thinking i would have one for lunch and keep the other bag incase i am supper hungry tomorrow. I scoffed the first bag while walking down the high street and scoffed the second bag during afternoon coffee!!!! I never eat during afternoon coffee!!!!!!! THREE BAGS OF CRISPS IN ONE DAY!! WHOOPS LOL.
There is a new sweet shop opened up in town and, yep, you guessed it, i went in!! BUT, i was pretty good, actually i just couldn't decide what i wanted so i got the 110 cal 'chomp' bar (which got scoffed before i even got back to work) and 100g of marshmallows, they can't be too bad, can they???? When i got back to work and looked at the cals of them on my phone i was so shocked 85 cals for 25 grams!!!! I had just bought 100g of the bloody things so i gave them to the girls at work and i had none!!!!!YAY!
Gail at work mentioned that she was having chinese tonight and i was like 'oooohhhhh i want that too' and at the gym, on the tv they were making some sort of apple strudle with cream and i wanted some of that and i wanted it NOW!!!!

I'm really pleased with how i coped with my mega hungry day, there was biscuits at work, which i didn't have and i went into a sweet shop and i could have bought a whole range of bad stuff in town today but i didn't. I have gone over my cals by just under 100 so it's not too bad at all AND i worked like a demon at the gym too cos i know that my dinner would take me over.

Cate & Jjjay I definatly think it is easier to accept compliments when it is just a 'wow, you look great' kinda thing but when they wanna go on and on about it, that's when i feel uncomfortable. And when they say 'oh, how have you managed it' i really wanna say 'i eat less and move more' and leave it at that lol.

DMR Yay wheatabix rock!!!! I love them. I use to have a banana too but they are too high in cals for me to have with breakfast. The wheatabix keeps me going til coffe, or even lunch (except today lol but i don't think anything would have helped today, it was just one of those days) I don't have seeds etc, i can't keep them in the house cos i would scoff them all in one go. Because they are healthy, my brain thinks i can eat them ALL lol

Ok, crazy hunger day over....I have even turned the light off in the kitchen (it is usually on if we are home) to tell myself to stay the fuck out!!!!!
 
AI found myself eating really fast today as well lol, must be something in the air! You did really well all things considered though :D
 
Hahaha sometimes when I'm at work, I get really hungry on my morning break and whatever I packed isn't enough... so I always wrap both my sandwiches separately and if I get that starving feeling, I'll eat morning tea and half my lunch. Usually does the trick, because then I end up having lunch a bit later because I'm not as hungry, and then I still have afternoon tea. Would probably help if I didn't wake up at 5am most mornings wanting breakfast right away, because usually I won't have morning tea at work till 10am-11am lol. Damn body clock!
 
Haha kate, your last post made me laugh a little. I guess your body just had immense cravings all at once! I'm glad that you didn't overload though, that would have been bad. Oh, and congratulations on your long, long list of exercises! :D
 
Yep I agree, if you can come out of a cravings day having "mitigated the damage" then well done!! Not every day is going to be easy going and its limiting the choices you make under bad circumstances that are going to make the big difference :D
 
ADAY 111

Breakfast: 2 wheatabix
Lunch: Ham, lettuce and light mayo sandwich, 97 cal crisps and a yoghurt
Dinner: Leftover lasange thingy with salad, light salad cream and courgette relish
Snacks: Banana and a packet of polo's

Exercise: 100 crunches & 50 bridges

Guess what i did in my lunchbreak!!!!!!!!
I had my belly button re-peirced!!!!!

I had it done about 10 years ago in the hope that it would make me lose weight so i could show it off......Well, that didn't happen but i loved it. About 8 months ago it started getting really sore cos i was gaining weight so fast (i had got up to about 230lbs!!!!) and the skin around it was really streched and all my clothes were mega tight and cut into it. I ended up having to take it out cos it hurt so much and within a week it had closed up :(
About an hour before my lunchbreak i was thinking about it (no idea why) and i thought 'my stomach is the smallest and most toned it has ever been, i am gonna pop in and see if the can do it at lunch!!' The tattoo/peircing shop is 2 doors down (rather handy, and they know me as i have tattoo's and other peircings) I was so excited!
It's weird looking at it in the mirror cos there is soo much less of my stomach than there was the last time i had a bar in there. It doesn't look lost in a vast area of flabby dough!!! :hurray: :hurray: Can't wait til i can get some new pretty bars for it.

I've had a good day. No mega hunger issues today!!! Back to my normal food. I still seem addicted to polo mints for some reason but they ain't too bad calorie wise so it's all good.
Pretty much every patient mentioned my weight loss this morning. it started to become too much!!!! One of them said ' wow, where's all your weight gone?' Bloody charming!!!!!! I was talkiing to the girls at work about it at lunch and they said that it was really really noticable, even in my uniform , so i am not gonna be able to escape it!!!!

I didn't go to the gym this evening, today is a rest day. I am gonna go tomorrow.

Thanks guys for your comments on my psycho hungry day!! They were great to read this morning, really made me determined to make sure i stayed on track today. Oh, Jay glad i made you laugh, i found it quite funny during the day luckly. and i was so determined to work off the crisps i had scoffed. :)
 
I wish I could get my belly button re-pierced, I had a drunken night out and at some point during the night I must've torn it. I woke up with dry blood all over me and it was hanging by less than a string of skin- took it straight out and now there is a MASSIVE lump of really ugly scar tissue there.
 
So sorry i was away for a couple of days katie,you know i had emergency issues!

Thank you so much for posting those pics!I really wanted to see your portions,cause you are loosing weight fast and you said once that you dont feel hungry.Thanks so much for remebering and taking the time to do that!


I laughed reading your hunger day!!!!You still did great and giving your marshmallows to the girls????thats will power!!!!

Great for having your belly button pierced again!!!i love the postive vibes you;re sending through , you seem so happy and on the go all the time!


I was reading the pacage of Wheetabix at the supermarket some days ago , thinking i should get them too, but i couldnt find the cals for two pieces.If you know please tell!Maybe i;ll try them,i never have had them!!!!


About compliments,before if someone told me i have lost weight i ALWAYS said no its your imagination,of No its the clothes im wearing,Now i say i know i have lost a lot!and a go on and on about it!

BUT when they go on and on and on about it i too feel bad.Not as much as you described but i do.Nothing you can do though you said it yourself its noticable and you look gorgeous!
 
AHAHAHAHAHAHA :hurray::hurray::hurray: That is SOOO awesome that you just went at got your belly pierced! How freaking awesome! Now THAT is a symbol of your awesome achievements for sure!

Funny how you have been bombarded with comments about your weight loss. :) It's awesome that you are looking so good and that people can notice, but it's a weird feeling when people comment on the 'old' you as if you aren't that person anymore, when really we are... just a bit different... I dunno. I found it really hard when people would saysomething like 'Wow you look so different! You look great!' thinking that everyone must have thought I looked so terrible before... but that's just a bit screwed up really! I hope you've been enjoying it!

Love your attitude as always, lovely lady.
 
ADAY 112

Breakfast: 2 wheatabix
Lunch: banana & 97 cal crisps
Dinner: 3 Southern breaded chicken strips, cous cous, cheesey/tomato pasta, salad, light ceaser dressing and courgette relish
Snacks: 2 small slices of granary bread with a tiny bit of marmite, banana

Exercise: week 4 of my interval running C25K

Fist of all here is a picture of my dinner for Jess
http://weight-loss.fitness.com/image/id/308072/width/350/height/263
I normally have a small plate but this was a normal size plate. Friday is a weird food day, i work thru til 3pm and have a break at 11.15 which is too early for lunch, hence the banana and crisps. We do our weekly shop on a fri evening so when i got home at about 3pm we had no spread, lettuce, ham or anything for a sandwich so had the last scrapings of marmite on bread.
We did our shopping late cos Mark was busy and went straight to the gym when we got back at 6.30, i shoved a banana in my face before i went cos i was soooooo hungry by then.
I have felt bloated and horribly fat with trapped wind this afternoon and i so didn't wanna go to the gym and fart my way thru my run :eek: Sorry, probably too much info but hey, i bet i made you giggle :smilielol5: Anyway, by the time i got back form shopping i was ok and was up for going running. I did week 4 of my interval running today and it was:-
5 min walk on 6.5
3 min run on 11.0
1 and a half min run on 9.0
5 min run on 11.0
2 and a half min run on 9.0
3 min run on 11.0
1 and a half min run on 9.0
5 min run on 11.0
10 min walk on 6.5 (it's usually a 5 min walk at the end but i wanted to finish on burning 400 cals)

The last 5 min run was a bloody killer!!!!!!! It was so so hard, i basically spent the last 2 mins sreaming at myself in my head Keep going, nearly there, keep going, keep going!!!! and i did it :hurray: :hurray: :hurray: Was really chuffed. It was only a few weeks ago that i actually had to stop half way thru cos i couldn't breath. I can't wait till i manage 20 mins on 11.0.

I had a 'please ground, swollow me up now' moment at the gym when i got there (no i didn't fart in public :eek:) Jane was in reception ( i know her from the theatre classes Jack goes to, her daughter goes, but i haven't seen her for months as she doesn't work at the gym often), anyway, i walked in and went to sign in and she squealed really loudly (she is a really loud, over the top kinda person) 'omg girl, look at you, you look totally amazing, you have lost sooooo much weight!' and went to give me a hug over the desk. There were about 5 guys stood there all staring at me and i was so so embarassed. When i got home i told Mark about it and he very seriously said that i am going to have to deal with it because it is going to happen alot now. We are going out and meeting up with loads of his workmates and other friends next friday who i haven't seen in months and i was going to wear my little black dress for the first time but now i am really crapping myself and part of me wants to wear baggy jeans and jumper. Ggggggrrrrrrrrrrr Why am i like this?!?!?!?!

When i got home from the gym at about 7.15 i was soooooo hungry and my dinner was bloody amazing!!!! i had cous cous and tomato/cheesy pasta with it and still stayed within my cals (yep, i'm sad and weighed it)

Lucy Eeeeewwww sweetie, that sounds so painful :( Have you asked somewhere if they are cool to go thru the scar tissue. Mine was done thru the scar tissue and you can't tell. It's really odd, the last time i had one in i was so so much fatter and i can't get over how different it looks on me know. I am more blown away with it than i was with clothes i think. :)

Jess You don't need to apologise for not being on here sweetie. You had far more important things going on in your life. I hope everything is all back to normal now.
Wheatabix are about 130 calories for 2 of them, i just have sweetner and milk but you can have fruit or yoghurt or anything really. they are great slow release energy. Really good brain food too so great to give kids in the morning. I only ever let Jack have wheatabix or porridge for breakfast on a school day.

Joh You sneaked that one in and i'm having to edit!!!! I love the new belly button, it makes my waist look so different :hurray:
I am struggling again with compliments. I genuinly think i would be totally fine if nobody noticed, i really think i would. I don't think i have told more than a handful of people how much i have actually lost either. I really do wish i wasn't like this, i never was before. I'm a total headcase :(



 
Arrrgh lady, you are doing SO well with the running!!! 5mins on 11kms, WOOT! Haha have you thought about what you're going to do when you finish c25k again? Maybe 10kms as rest and everything else 12kms...? :reddevil:
 
wow on the running!!!!you seem to manage everything so well katie!!!!

Thanks for the photos!i love them!i love food fotos and generally all photos of weight loss journey!

Wheetabix have so many cals?cause if you add the milk or a banana its a bit on the high side.I will get a box though to try!


what is relish?
 
A:eek: If you wear baggy clothes to meet mark work mates, I will be most upset with you! You will look fabulous in your new black dress. This way, its good... because you will get all the compliments and gushing out of the way within 5 minutes and not have to worry about it any more. Rather than just bumping into people one by one. You could always get a cute jacket or something to put over the top at first if you feel to exposed. And have a couple of drinks before you go there. You'll be fiiiiiine! And look fiiiiiiiiine ;)

Think I might get some weetabix too actually... So much quicker that porridge.
 
ADAY 113

Breakfast: 2 slices of wholemeal toast with light spread and marnite
Lunch: Couscous, cheesey/tomato pasta (all weighed) with salad, light ceaser dressing and courgette relish
Dinner: 3 breaded chicken strips with cous cous, cheesey/tomato pasta (weighed) light salad cream and courgette relish
Snacks: 97 cal bag of crisps

Exercise: 100 crunches, 50 bridges and 3 hours of digging and weeding at the allotment.

I lay in bed this morning thinking about why i am struggling with people commenting on my weight loss cos i had a nail appointment and Sophie hadn't seen me for 4 weeks! I Still don't understand it and i got a bit annoyed with myself for stressing about it. I feel like i am being ungrateful for looking better, like i am complaining all the time Gggrrrrrr!!!!!!! Anyway, i actually took a deep breath before i walked in for my appointment but i didn't have to worry cos she didn't say anything :) I had been given a voucher for there for my birthday so i had some waxing done and Callie, who does it has been away traveling for six months and it was good to catch up. She did mention my loss but in a conversational way and we talked about it and all the running i am doing. It was really nice actually. I dealt with it fine. :)
Then went up to the allotment and worked pretty hard. It's weird how much easier it is digging now that i am so much fitter, i wasn't out of breath or struggling with my back hurting etc YAY!!!!

Bec's has just left after dying my hair, yep, another death scene in the bath :) And we had a really good talk about my fucked up head. She made me go and get my dress and show her it on me. She was so so sweet and told me i HAD to wear it next friday! She is such a great friend and really knows how to talk me round to not feeling such a freak. She is gonna come clothes shopping with me when i get to my size 12 goal!

It's weigh in day tomorrow and again the scales haven't moved all week :mad: I really don't think i am gonna lose tomorrow, i said the same last week and did but i don't think i can get away with it for 2 weeks in a row. It's ok though, i know i have eaten healthy (even on my 'i'm so hungry i wanna eat everything' day) so i will try and not be disheartened. I have lost every week so far so it is gonna happen sooner or later.

Lucy Ya know what, when i finish doing 11.0 & 9.0 i will do it on 10.0 & 12.0 just for you :) It will probably take me forever to manage it but i will do it!!!!!

Jess Ha ha relish is like a runnier chutney. If you don't know what chutney is, it's sort of preserved veg and spices. The relish is what we made with the courgettes we grew at the allotment. It has courgette, peppers, onions, sugar and spices in it. It's kinda like jam but made with veg. i am totally addicted to our relish, i am gonna be gutted when it runs out. This year we made all sorts of things with the courgettes like muffins, fritters, soup and tea bread but next year i am just gonna made loads and loads of relish!!!!!!! I could just eat it from the jar!!!

Ruthie OK boss i will do as i am told :rolleyes: Bec's said it looked really lovely on me (it's proper loose around my waist now) which boosted my confidence a bit. I do have a nice black floaty cardi thing i was gonna wear with it. And i really didn't look at it like that, you are right, it will get loads of people out of the way and i am definalty gonna have a few drinks before we go out!!!!!!
You are a total darling, you always know what to say :) Oh and :hurray: wheatabix rock!!!!

Oh well, fingers crossed for tomorrows weigh in.
 
Kate, MY turn to say if you don't wear that dress, I'll be angry!!!! You'll feel fabulous, and if people want to tell you that you look fabulous, let them!! Then change the subject if you feel uncomfortable... or put it back on them, and pay a compliment in return. Then change the subject.


Make sure you get some photos too!


And YUM, chutney....
 
AI lost sod all!!!!! I am actually pretty gutted, more so than i should be. I feel like having a 'fuck it' day!!!! but i will try not to. :(
 
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