Cate's Diary

I don't think it'll stay this bad indefinitely. And that's one of the things that make health issues hard to explain to outsiders: they often aren't black and white and they change over time. My peanut allergy sucks but people get the concept: they feed me peanuts, I need emergency medical care or I die. My histamine intolerance? That's completely different matter. It means I can't eat aged cheese at all so that's simple, but I can usually have a glass of wine without any trouble. And on a good day I may have two. But on a bad day I can't have any at all and on those days people think I'm just making excuses because they can't see the difference.
 
Your body was basically attacked so your immune system is weakened now and you will be hyper-sensitive for a while until it builds back up. That's what I'm taking from it. You poor thing, how scary to go through that. I know you will be feeling a lot better in a few weeks, that perfume must have been toxic stuff altogether, how awful for you! I'm rooting for you here Cate. Xx
 
Your immune system isn't weakened, it's annoyed as hell and overly sensitive as a result, but otherwise I agree with Em :)
 
Hey, Cheeselover. How are you?

I’m good Cate, thanks. I’ve been doing a Lent and so far so good (still one week to go). So eating/exercisewise I’m being rather boring as I’m sticking to my plan. ;)

I really hope that (as LaMa said) this bad deterioration of allergy is temporary and you will get better soon! :)
 
Thanks Emily, LaMa, cheeselover & Rebel. I hope things settle down too.
I woke up this morning thinking they had. I didn't feel itchy & wasn't woozy. I went into the laundry to let our little dog out, did a quick clean(with fragrance-free cleaner) & the next thing you know I'm gasping & itching all over again. I have been shaky since & back with the brain fog. I am making a record number of spelling mistakes, which Grammarly is showing up for me. Thank you, Grammarly :D
There must be something in the laundry that I'm reacting to now, but I don't know what that is. It may be the dog!
That is what happens with toxic overload. I'm now super-sensitive. If I can get rid of everything in my house that I'm reacting to now it will help. Not my little old dog though. I'll wash her today! :)
 
Thank you, Grammarly
The school has it attached to their site and i love it...i need to check the cost of putting it on my computer...
Oh and i need to find the Texas edition because it's all prim and proper and we really don't get along.... ;)
 
I went into the laundry to let our little dog out, did a quick clean(with fragrance-free cleaner) & the next thing you know I'm gasping & itching all over again.
Don´t like :( I washed with soap nuts for a while but I can´t say they did a very good job. Especially for whites. My mom said simply using soft soap may be better but I never got around to trying it.
 
I "washed" all around the laundry trough with vinegar to remove any mould that may be there & did another double-check of all my cupboards & found a few things that may be throwing my senses into overload. They are things that have never been a problem before & not stuff I actually use, but, who knows?
We're going to Hobart tomorrow & I will stay in R's house with his dog & one of his friends so that G & R can go to the live show I have tickets for. One of R's friends can use my ticket. It sucks, as I would love to be able to go, but I know it's not possible. Suck, suck, suck! Hopefully, this is just temporary!
 
I can't even think how to start explaining how I am at the moment. I'll just say that because of my exposure I have been tipped over the edge into a new world, or another stratosphere. I don't like this new place one little bit. This morning I was thinking I may have been getting marginally better, but after today I realise that I will have to stay at home indefinitely. I'll come back tomorrow & try to explain it all, if I can.
 
I'm sorry about that, my friend. You sound like how I feel when I think I'm doing everything right and my guts still try to kill me. Unscented jedi hugs.
 
I'm sorry about that, my friend. You sound like how I feel when I think I'm doing everything right and my guts still try to kill me. Unscented jedi hugs.
Thank you, LaMa. I read this last night & had a quiet little cry. I think if I had tried answering it then it would have turned into a full-on bawl, so I didn't. I know that you understand me as much as anyone else does & it helps to have that support. This place is about so much more than weight-loss & fitness. We are a supportive & loving community.
I'm sorry you're suffering Cate. We're all here supporting you whenever you need. Take your time, step by step.
Thank you, Em. I'm still hoping that this is a temporary state & I may be able to heal enough to venture out again, but I have the sinking feeling that my life has changed & I will have to wear a mask when I do. I tried yesterday, but the mask I wore still let fragrance fumes come in & I had another major reaction.

Yesterday-
Because I had a good night's sleep on Monday night I felt quite a bit better. It was nice to be back home. I headed off with G to his vets' golf, but I noticed fragrance on people that I hadn't noticed before & had a couple of head spins. I hung around & did some paperwork & the drove back into town & parked down by the river & just breathed in the very fresh air. I probably sat there for an hour or so. I looked at my shopping list & figured out my priorities. The local whole food place I have a regular weekly order of a loaf of organic oat sourdough bread & I could get a few things there on my list. I decided to try wearing the mask in there, that my sister had sent me in time for the weekend away as I knew that the woman who works there would not react rudely to it. They have "essential" oils in there as well as smelly scented soap so I knew that I would need the mask. I had to go outside once to lift the mask & breathe as I struggle for air in a mask, but I managed to get my shopping done, missing only one thing on my list.
I needed just one thing from the chemist & was standing outside the back entrance (non-perfume end) trying to think if I was up to it or not, when one of the chemists, returning from his lunch break, asked me if I was ok. I said no & briefly told him my problem. He said he would get the item left on the back counter & explain why.
When I went in with the mask on, there was one older woman being served & another waiting & they both stared at me. I tried staying away from them but tried to make it obvious that I was in a queue to be served. I could smell their fragrance through the mask! When I got served I was firmly holding my nose & pointed at the medicine & the girl nodded & told me how much. I got it out one-handed & as I was giving her the money another staff member came over & squirted anti-bacterial gel on her hands, directly under my nose. I grabbed my stuff & staggered outside.
I went outside & got some fresh air in my lungs & was probably there for about 5 minutes. I decided I needed to talk to a chemist to try to come to some sort of workable arrangement to get medication, so foolishly tried to go back in again. I asked the girl on the back counter if I could talk to a chemist & she went over & they were staring & talking & staring & talking & I thought I was going to pass out. I went over & said "forget it. I have to go outside" or something along those lines. My brain was in a total fog & I could feel my body going into shock again. I managed to get outside again & got to my car, which was parked out the back in the supermarket carpark.
I know that I bawled my eyes out, used my puffer, took some paracetamol, drank some water & sat with my head down on the steering wheel & just tried breathing. I'm not sure how long I was like this, but when I lifted my head, there was S, one of the young male chemists, with a really caring look on his face. I mouthed "do you have anything smelly on" & he said no, so I got out of the car. I almost fell & then leaned on the car & we talked for about 15 minutes. He already knew about my perfume allergy, which helped. The outcome is that if I need anything from the chemist I can ring & they will bring it outside to me. He was going to set up an account for me so that I can just pay it monthly online. He is such a sweet guy & this is a really good solution to at least one problem. After he left I sat in the car until I felt I could drive & the drove back out to the club & sat in the car & rang my sister. She has gone so far down this slippery slope that is MCS & she told me that everything I tell her gives her such a sense of deja vu. She is so sorry that I have been tipped into her world. I had a good cry & she said that when she told me to stay home for a while she really meant a few weeks, rather than a few days.
Last night I just tried to chill & not think about it, but told G what had happened & that I needed to stay home for probably a couple of weeks. My head is all over the place, but if this is my new reality, I will have to get used to it. Hopefully the new mask I ordered online will work better.
It's a Vogmask. This is the one I ordered. I am hoping that the valve will help me breathe in it, but not let fragrance in. I can't just save a photo or copy it so will add the link I bought it from- https://www.theallergyshop.com.au/rainbows-allergy-mask/ There are some nicer ones on the Singapore vogmask site so if this one works for me I will buy a couple more in different patterns.
OK. I had better stop. I have to write a letter to my doctor & the nurse sometime, but I think I'll leave that until tomorrow. I don't want to feel sad & I need fresh air. I also need to get dressed!
 
I am so disappointed! Vogmask sounds like a full-face alien thing for cosplay or something and all I see on the link is a pleasant-looking colorful little mask :( I hope it helps you though. The silver lining in today´s story: kind people are everywhere, you are good at attracting them and you will find your way in this strange new world.
 
There should be a love option for your post, LaMa. LOVE :beating: Thank you, my friend. You make me smile.
I have had a decent day & managed to get some chores done around the house & downloaded lots of stuff that I am going to put on a USB that my doctor can download onto her computer. I will also have a copy of the letter to the medical practice when I write it. There are hospital guidelines, signs for doors etc.
I will do my own list of what I know I am allergic to, what I will need to take to a hospital if I need to go, information for emergency workers etc. I feel better having made plans.
On another note, after ordering the Vogmask LaMa I then saw a paisley one. I love paisley. I hope this mask works for me, but better still, I hope my system settles down again! I don't think I will ever be without a mask again though.
 
Not the one I tried yesterday, which was one my sister sent me to take away for the weekend. I haven't got the vogmask yet. I'll let you know how I go, but I won't be putting it to the test for a while as I'm not going anywhere. If anyone comes to our house I'll try it though.
 
I'm so sorry you're having trouble with sensitivities Cate. A woman at my IRL support group has mild sensitivities and reacts if harsh cleaner is used. I hope the Vogmask works! That would be a blessing for you. Sending good vibes your way! Aces, Jane.
 
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