I've handed in my last assignment so I'm officially FREE!!! WOOOHOOO!!!!!!
Saturday was great food and exercise wise. Yesterday I did work for 12 hours (seriously hehe, soo productive on the last day

) then went running and then had an emotional conversation with D (my ex boyfriend) and came home and binged again BIG TIME, but I know EXACTLY why I did it and I'm going to make a conscious effort to slowly stop eating my emotions away and punishing myself. This HAS to happen. It won't happen straight away but I need to work on it because it really affects me. I just need to stay calm rather than feel hopeless.
I was thinking though, I never used to think of binging as a form of self-harm but it REALLY is (like I would think about people who cut themselves and think 'WHAT does that give you?', but the more conscious I am of my behaviours the more I can understand these guys, it's just another way to numb yourself up when things are not right and when you're feeling shitty about yourself)
So much heaviness in here lately. Really need some LIGHT FANTASTIC
I'm taking it easy this morning/afternoon. Then need to start sorting out the flat coz moving out on Wednesday and going to stay at my Kiwi friend's for a week. The emotional conversation yesterday was partly about that.I only have one week left in China and haven't really been spending any time with D, because frankly I'm finding it very uncomfortable for loads of reasons and he got upset that I'm staying with my friend rather than at his place for that week. Surely it would be waaaaay too messy. Relationships, eh.
It's a brand new week, let's make it fucking awesome
