WOW - How would you react?

funshine

funshine

New member
ok so today me and my dh were chatting to a few people after the church service and then this lady I've talked to a few times came up to me - said hi - smiles and says "When are you due".

:confused:I could have bawled right there on the spot. Instead I looked at her with a very disappointed look and said "I'm not pregnant".

WOW - that hurt!

She of course appologized claiming that she must have had me mixed up with someone else who told her they were. Complete bs! I tried to be as polite as I could - simply 1/2 smiled - and wished her a good week and left.

This isn't the first time someone has asked me this - and I don't deny that I carry most of my weight in my mid-section but.....how can a person who hardly knows you ask that question. I think it's horrible.

*sigh* this did not help my depression over my weight.

how would you react if someonen asked you this????
 
The woman is an idiot, and should feel like one, for asking you that without knowing for sure that you were pregnant. Hasn't the world learned by now that you never ask a woman when she is due unless you know, 100% that she is pregnant??


I think you handled it fine, no sense in calling her out, hopefully she was embarrassed enough. Yes, it's embarrassing, it's happened to me. Just know that you are working on it and move on. Next time you see that woman, give her a great big smile and say hello!
 
there's a similar thread somewhere here where somoene got asked the same question..

It's a tactless question to ask

I got crap from someone at work recently - who was 8 1/2 months pregnant at the time -and she wanted to know why i never asked about the pregnancy - i basically said I wanted to make no assumptions that she was... or that she was actually keeping the baby or whatever..

Just move on from it...
 
Hey, some hugs your way!
I have been on both sides of that story, when I asked I was little (10) but it is burned into my memory forever. I was very innocent and my mom WAS pregnant so when I asked the nice lady when her baby was coming out I meant no harm. Still I felt sooo guilty and still, 13 plus years later) it hunts me down... I felt so so sorry! I am sure that lady doesn't feel great about herself either!

When I was at the receiving end, it was on a bus. A lady told me to sit down, because in my "state" (pat pat pat of her own belly and knowing smile) I should really sit down. I felt like bawling but I just smiled and said thank you and sat down. Then I patted my belly and grinned back to her. So what if a random stranger thinks that?? I know that I am doing my best to lose this weight now, so honestly... whatever!
My midregion has shrunken a bit since my weightloss started and I am happy about it, but I like it when my man puts his hand kindly on my big tummy... I am gonna LOVE being pregnant!!!
But for no, hugs hugs hugs, Camy
 
Like maleficent said, that is such a tactless question. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. I wish people would realize that it's a bad, bad, bad idea to ask every woman wish a belly when she's due. I had a child ask me why my tummy was so big. I could have died on the spot, even though I had my 4 month old excuse right there. I just moved on and resisted the urge to drop kick him across the room.
 
While I agree that the question can be tactless, I also think people are too sensitive about their image. The woman was probably trying to be friendly, and asked the question without over-thinking it. Don't worry about it too much.
 
I had the same thing happen to me a few months ago...I just laughed it off and said "I'm not pregnant, i'm just fat!" lol but it was fairly tramatic, so I sympathize.
 
newbride02 said:
I had the same thing happen to me a few months ago...I just laughed it off and said "I'm not pregnant, i'm just fat!" lol but it was fairly tramatic, so I sympathize.
Click to expand...

That is exactly what I did. I was actually asked this twice since starting my new job in Oct. The second time, while I still laughed and quaintly identified myself as 'just fat', was the moment I was like ok... this is getting out of control and I am doing something about it!
 
Well a few years ago my boyfried had a car accident; none of us were hurt but our car was totally damaged and we were waiting for help to arrive to help clear out the mess and tow the car...at that moment someone driving by asked me; are you alright? In your condition being pregnant and all you sure you are fine...I was so shocked and embarassed at the same time especially being asked this question in front of my boy friend....I thanked the person for their concern and mentioned I am not pregnant. My BF never brought up the topic..but I was hurt; I kept thinking abt it and decided I will lose the weight and have successfully lost 45 pounds to date so just take this as motivation; I know it hurts but dont let it derail you or depress you from your efforts...
 
The same happened to me a few years ago, I just said 'I'm not pregnant thats just me'. I has shocked and upset and the woman who asked was as embarrassed as me. Don't dwell on it or let it put you off.
 
I am sorry sweetie. I am sure she feels bad.

I did that to someone when I was pregnant, I said 'how how does it feel, it's exciting isn't it, how far along are you?' She said "I am not pregnant!! OMG, I am on a blind date, does he think I look pregnant???".. I was so embarrassed. I am NEVER going to assume again!
 
I'd feel hurt too. I'm sorry this happened to you. People used to get up for me on the train, reason implied. I carry my weight in my tummy too.
 
If someone doesn't even know you well enough to have already been informed of a due date, I don't see where it's any of their business. I probably would have cried right there on the spot! I haven't been asked about my due date but I have been told I would be a beautiful girl if I lost weight, which crushed me to no end... Sorry you ran into such an disrepectful person, they never should have asked you that. Keep your chin up :)
 
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