Why do I feel this way?

SHYJESTA

SHYJESTA

New member
Hey everyone, for the past 2 weeks I have been feeling really depressed umm not suicidal or anything just like I can't do it. I had been doing good losing atleast 2 lbs a week or so and then BAM! I lost nothing and well I actually gained 3 lbs. This only makes me feel even more down about it. I want to get back on track so bad! All day I have been eye balling some chips ahoys that my wife bought but I am fighting. I haven't jogged in over a week and I don't exercise, I never really exercised before but I did manage my calorie intake I kept it around 1500 daily. That worked great for me. I have got to the point where I can drink ALOT of diet drinks. I guess I try to justify that they don't have "calories" however I feel as if they are just as bad as the regular sodas. I want that desire I had through out the summer. :cool:
 
This is for me as much as you -because my motivation and mojo have left the building except I really don't care all lthat much... So Im gonna talk to myself - and you can listen... (except I don't have a wife, though could use one cuz I am a slob)


remind yourself why you want to lose weight... your motivation has to come from within you... and they are your reasons alone... do you want to wear that european style swimsuit at the pool (and if I'm anywhere i the vicinity, unless you look like an olympic 22 year old swimmer, I will mock you :D - behind your back :D ) fo you want to look like a stud for your wife? to be around for the dog, the kids, the cute next door neighbor... Find your reason for wanting to lose weight and keep that as a reminder - on the mirror (though if it is the neighbor, you might want to keep it in aplace the wife can't see - well unless ya'll ar einto that :D

Every few times of doing what you're supposed to be doing... reward yourself... the reward is up to you... keep a calendar on the fridge and put gold stars on it - and see how many gold stars you can get in a row... it takes 28 days to build a habit... and 28 days is doing the same thing 28 days in a row... taking it one day a at a time... you will get there....

Don't focus so much on the scale, it's not your friend and it's tempremental... We all obsess over it way too much and too m any people judge their day based on the reading and that's just bull... Focus on you behavior... building healthy eating habits, building a sensible exercis habit. Focus on how your clothes are fitting, how you're feeling... Focus on the behavior and the numbers will fall into place.

I've read too much on the negative impact of diet soda so i would strongly suggest losing them... drink water - flavored water - homemade iced tea... and keep the soda as an occassional treat...

If you do exercise regularly - you can eat more calories

good luck and feel better... like smokey the bear used to say -only you can prevent forest fires, and only you can make yourself do what you need to get the results you want.
 
Excellent advice, Mal. I would put a smilie here, but I know you don't like them.;) Oops, sorry, couldn't resist...haha.

I know how you feel, shyjesta. I've been on a plateau for over a month where I gain and lose the same 3lbs. Last week I just spent the week eating whatever I wanted. I gained 6.5lbs, but have already taken off 4 of them. Sometimes you just have to give your diet a break. But if you haven't been exercising, that would be a great way to start losing again. I cannot tell you how important exercise is--not only for losing weight, but for being healthy. And isnt' that what we're all trying to do here--become healthier? You don't have to go crazy with it--especially at first. Just go out and walk a bit to get started. Look into joining a gym and doing some weight training. That will really make the lbs drop off. Just 30min 3X a week and you would see a huge difference.:beerchug:
 
I can totally relate to you on your loss of motivation. I stayed the same weight for over three months. It didn't matter if I exercised or not. It didn't matter if I really really watched what I ate. It didn't seem to matter what i did I stayed at 203-204 for what seemed like forever. I hated it. I hated the scale. I hated food. I hated everything. It got to the point I figured there was no use in trying anymore I was obviously at the weight I was supposed to be. It wasn't easy to face everyday but taped to my desk at work where i have to look at it 5 days a week is a set of pictures. One of me when I was skinny ans one of me at my heaviest. I hated seeing them everyday but at the same time I would have thoughts in the back of my mind about how nice it would be to look like I used to. When I finally got past that hump and got down to 200 it was quite the feeling of accomplishment. I now have more motivation and look forward to losing more. I know it is really hard and some days giving up seems so much easier but remember that all of us on here are on your side and will support you in any way we can!! Don't give up on yourself!!
 
Ditto on the advice! And....

Morning,

Excellent advice above!

I can relate to feeling depressed - I remember when that feeling derailed my last attempt at weight loss (2? 3? years ago). I had done a thoroughly magnificent workout at the gym and upon weighing myself, found my weight had the audacity to go up instead of in the proper direction! I called my mom, said, this isn't working, wah wah wah, and promptly returned home with my confidence in tatters and my desire to continue to work out, utterly nil.

It takes time to work thru....but now in my vast venerable age, I equate it like so. If you've been thrown out in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean with only a life preserver and nothing else, with no shore in sight, you really can't say, okay I've had enough, I'm giving up! You'll just plain die that way.

Yes, sounds extreme....but that mindset really does help me.

Hang in there (it really will come to pass),

Barbara
 
From the book I've been reading... Mindless Eating, the last paragraph of the book, has an excellent quote - that I've already paraphrased in someone's diary (I don't remember who's actually)

but it's basically

you're about 10 miles or so from home, with no means of transportation to get you there... you could run... and you'd get there faster but when you get tehre you'd be hot and sweaty and not really functioning... If you walked home, it'd take you a tad bit longer, but when you got there... you'd still be functioning.

Note to self: this isn't a race... it's not who gets there first - it's about getting to where you want to be however long it takes.
 
Here's my take on things.

We've all talked about weight loss like it's journey. A journey is different from simply moving from one place to another in the most expedient way. A journey implies adventure, struggle, moments of indecision and even backtracking.

Weightloss, like any major endeavor doesn't move in a straight line. Sometimes you are all enthusiasm, working hard in an "active phase" and other times things intrude and you have to rest on your oars for awhile.

The trick is not to lose all you gained (or lost) during the coasting times. It's too easy to beat yourself up for not having enough motivation, then pitch the towel in and hit the twinkies and ale, winding up worse than when you started DAMHIKT.

It's okay to be down, just try not to compound matters by being out of control with your eating. Maintain the level you worked hard to achieve and you can use that as a jumping point for when you want to more actively work to the next level.

If you let yourself go, you are doubly damned, you have to lose the weight all over again and deal with the fact that you allowed it to happen, ouch, OUCH!

So give yourself time to rest, focus on maintaining where you are now until you want to move again!

Good Luck!

David C
 
Hero's Journey

DCarr10760 said:
...Here's my take on things.

We've all talked about weight loss like it's journey. A journey is different from simply moving from one place to another in the most expedient way. A journey implies adventure, struggle, moments of indecision and even backtracking.....
Click to expand...

Having gone thru it myself (heck, I'm still doing so!), I choose to call it a hero's journey. It's something that is guaranteed to make you face yourself the way you really are...not the way you choose to delude yourself (I was quite an expert on self-delusion!).

Such things are bound to be difficult, painful, soul-searing at times.....all the components necessary for a true hero's journey. In today's indulgent society, it takes a lot of strength and courage to proactively choose to take that first step....and more so to continue even when the chips are down.

Everyone has the ability to be a hero to others...but being a hero to oneself is just as important.

I'd write more, but I'm so out of it now from the allergy/cold medicine I've taken, I double if I could make further coherent sense. :)

Best wishes,

Barbara
 
DCarr10760 said:
Barbara,

A great post! Hero's Journey. Perfect description.

Hope you feel better from the cold!

David C
Click to expand...

Thanks for the kind words, I very much appreciate them!

And as for the cold, it's progressed to the point I have to bail out on kendo today (a major WAH but hey, these things happen - better NOT to infect the other students). Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

Best wishes,

Barbara
 
the funny thing is this.... I was just feeling the same way as you SHYJESTA! I have been on a weight loss program, doing cardio everyday for 30 mins, eating right and I cant even lose 20 pounds. I am trying to stay positive because my goal is to wear a bikini to a cruise that I want to attend next year. THIS IS SO HARD! I want to eat snacks but I keep thinking about my goal...Having a goal really helps. keep focussed you can do it!
 
Hey everyone thank you for the comments. Each and everyone really had some great information and your all right! Well I have limited myself to just one diet soda and thats when I eat my Dinner. I have been drinking close to a gallon a day, but one thing I finally noticed which was "duh" I was spending all my time online and SITTING.

Well today from 8 in the morning until 4 or so I was busy cleaning the house and the yard and I didn't realize how much time I spend because it went by fast. I didn't focus on gaining more weight but rather just doing things that need to be done. I didn't weight myself this week but tonight I did just for the heck of it and well it's showing 267 which is two pounds down from the dreaded "269"
tomorrow is my offical weigh in so I hope it stays around 267.

Thanks for the comments being able to come to this forum and just share my thoughts has really helped me keep going and fighting this dang addiction!
 
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