Michael, I would leave Blancita the hell alone if I were you. She has been on the forum for awhile and is very supportive and helpful to people here, hence the reason she is well-liked. I adore Blancita, as do lots of other people around here, so you're not going to be making any friends if you continue to attack her. She was merely expressing an opinion that differed from yours. I think she is free to do that. There is no need to get nasty. I and a few others had a bad feeling about you, and now you have proven us correct. I think you're just another forum troll who likes to go around stirring up trouble.
So BACK OFF! Go crawl back under the rock from which you came. bye bye
Anyone reading this post objectively from start to finish will realize two things:
a) She's emotional
b) That after I stuck the olive branch out (twice) she rejected it. I have limited patience for people who can't end argument civilly.
As for a negative feeling about me? Give me a break. What this feels like is something akin to trying to fit into the popular group at school...I was invited out a few times...but gasp...the 5th time I was invited out, I questioned alpha-cheerleader's behaviour! Now I'm in the group's bad books because I won't apologize for it.
Because i've stuck the olive branch out and she's kicked it aside more than once, this will end only when she doesn't respond. As soon as she leaves it be, I'll pretend like this little tiff didn't happen. That might be hard for you, but it isn't for me.
Michael,
If this "exchange" with Blancita is any indication of your skill at argument, you might want to rethink Law as a career.
Make your point clearly. If others disagree, argue fairly. There is never anything to be gained by resorting to childish tactics like questioning the quality of somebody's education, or spelling. Makes you look like you are losing. Keep to the facts, keep a respectful tone and take the high road. Even if you're wrong, you're respected.
You are now a long way from that.
Lighten-up.
David C
Heh this is lovely. Despite the barrage of remarks where outsiders are trying to escalate this through various methods (neg. rep, insults) I'm not going to bite. I have no issue with you. I argued fairly at the beginning. I'm going to ignore your jabs. Here is an analytical review (sigh):
Original response to poster:
However, besides that, it sounds like you need to re-organize and re-motivate your life. Here it is as plain as I can say.
#1: Your weight is a function of how much you eat and how much exercise you get in a day. It sounds like you need to eat less and to exercise more. There is no magic formula minus getting into a caloric deficit.
#2: Cut the smoking. What's the use of losing weight if you are destroying your lungs.
#3: As for the boyfriend...does he dress similarly to you? My experience? Guys who do camo, dog collars, dress in black, etc, are usually immature and insecure themselves and they are hardly a source of motivation. Especially given what he said about you. Clean up your look go to college (or do academic upgrading if you need it) and find someone quality.
Initial issue was with one sentence...do you all agree? This started on: "Clean up your look, go to college and find someone quality".
Blancita's response:
I disagree with the "cleaning up your look" advice. I believe people should be individuals and dress the way they want, as long as their behavior doesn't hurt others we need to be who we are in life and not everyone strives to be the mainstream cookie cutter college sorority girl or whatever you suggested. They can still go to college with this "un-clean" look or do anything else they want to do. Be you, DO YOU.
Thanks for the input. But I didn't suggest cookie cutter. Or anything at all really minus a very generic singular sentence.
My response: One sentence to her started this off:
I also love the corporate lawyer espousing 'being yourself'. Pot/kettle.
It's a singular response to someone disagreeing with me. Honestly? I made an assumption. Most people I know who are lawyers are analytical and have thick skin. And you can jibe with them. Find ONE post where I had an argument with anyone else since ive been here? I had 200 posts with 400 positive reputation.
Blancita's Response
You have a lot of nerve Michael to say because I'm a corporate lawyer I must be all "cleaned up" and mainstream and so its the pot calling the kettle black. You dont know me, my style, my friends, my background, to make that comment. A job is a job, its not ME. We politely disagreed with your premise (AND STILL DO despite your "clarification") but you're taking it to a whole other level.
Ya, the nerve of me to think a lawyer generally presents a certain image. That can't be true, can it? Gimme a break. It's a general stereotype, and since to most normal people a good one, why go off about it? Again, to clarify, i took it to a whole new level through
a singular sentence: pot/kettle. Evil words I know, what an instigator...(sarcasm on).
My response:
It isn't nerve. It is the truth...99 times out of 100 at least. I can count on one hand how many corporate lawyers I know who deviate to any significant degree from the norm...and that is premised on being an amputee. You may have disliked my comments and that's fine. This is an advice forum. You won't agree with everyone.
What's annoying is that instead of doing what most people do, which is offer alternative advice without reference to everything they disagree with, you decided to challenge my post directly. Almost like it was an issue of fact. It would be different if you were correcting an error regarding a nutritional paradigm or something.
You will get very tired if you attempt to act as a third party mediator everytime someone gives subjective advice to another person. Especially in a forum where people specifically ask for it.
Here is another stereotype. Why is it that girls are more prone to commenting on subjective advice given to someone else? Are you angry at society because people are judged for their appearance? Or their habits? Or is it just to feel included? A mothering instinct gone awry?
By this point im visibly annoyed. I'll take back the last sentence as being inflammatory. I shouldn't have wrote it. I was annoyed at her flipping out.
Blancita's Reponse:
Well here's the 1 person then. Sorry if I'm an individual and not like every other corporate lawyer out there. Is that OK with you? Is it possible that I'm not what you are obviously judging me to be based on my job? My job is what I do to earn a living, it does NOT define me, my values, friends, approach to life, beliefs etc. DONT STEREOTYPE ME PLEASE! I hope its OK with you if we actually express our disagreement, or must we only allow people to make comments but no one else is allowed to comment on those comments, even if they are rude and/or misguided? So sorry that I didn't know the Forum Rules that you seem to have created and that you were annoyed by me. Do you mind if I found your advice silly and I decided to express that? You made a "statement of fact" that people who look different will not be happy or successful, and I challenged that statement. Thanks for worrying about my energy levels. I decide to respond to whatever I feel like, hope that's OK with you. Michael, that last comment was just immature and assinine. I am not angry at society for anything at all. I already feel included here so I dont need to reply just to feel included. I replied because I had something to say and I said it. IS THAT OK WITH YOU MICHAEL?
That was all in bold. How do you expect me to respond to that? You can count on one hand now: TWO sentences out of place, and one was genuinely meant to be a point of discussion and not considered insulting. However:
My response:
Okay, realize the last comment was meant light-heartedly. Where is that corporate demeanor? Haha I'm kidding! Bold type scares me
You aren't going to report me to the law society are you?
Michael
Olive branch stuck out. I took her bold text inflammatory comments and tried to put a simmer on this. It degenerates from there...however any quick preview of other posts shows I stuck out another olive branch, which was quickly rebuked. So I went on the offensive. Or really, just a comment or two within the post that expressed my distaste for her irrational emotional response.
And if you think those comments are offbase, every person who negative repped me has thrown in their own version of the instigative remark. You did about being a quality lawyer, others kept their attempts to PM. I've ignored them all.
Conclusion: In summary, this will end when she doesn't respond. Simple, wouldn't you think?
Michael
. I didn't read past the part about how I'm overly emotional, a typical response from certain types of males who try to use the "women are overly emotional" bull shit against them. Whateva dude.