What was your Wake Up Call?

The first thing I want to do is give each and every one of my fellow WLF companions an ENORMOUS hug :grouphug: and say that you are all utter champions and are truly inspirational. You looked at it - You had the courage to face it - And you are on the way to defeating it. BRAVO!!! :party:

_________

For me, it was denial, denial denial.
I simply didn't care enough about my Self to look after myself. Eventually that morphed into self-loathing and coupled with self-defeating behavior and constant self-ridicule, my spirit just crashed and burned..

For some reason I have always waited till the very last minute - until I'm in the worst possible place within myself and then (and only then) do I seem to act. I just keep on pushing my luck ????

My relationships were suffering because of low self-esteem issues and I was becoming a bitter and twisted hermit who was angry with herself - yet those around me were the ones that suffered most. My daughter didn't have a happy mother and my partner had a detatched and jealous spouse.


And that ladies and gentlemen was all it took for me to snap out of it, get my head straight and start putting things into action in pursuit of a more balanced and healthy life. :beating:
 
this is a great thread..

for me, thatd be spending the last 8 months barely being able to go outside my room due to paranoia, except to exercise at the gym and buy food, maybe going outside to socialise once a fortnight.

i stopped playing gigs and promoting cause i thought i looked too ugly. i used to do that every week as a favourite pasttime.

the last time i played a gig, i got one member to drive me home so i could get changed, and ended up pretty much running away once we were done. after that i had to cancel playing a month later cause i realised i was on the edge of crashing.. unfortunately in their anger 2 members told me that my reasons for quitting were unpresidented, and that i was a 'pretentious selfish b*tch' who should stop inflicting insecurities on them, and that i should grow up.. which put me down even more given it was the only thing i managed to keep going socially with people i thought cared, and has fed into my endless stream of obsessive self-destructive thoughts for the past 3 months now..

finding that no matter how much i exercised i didnt lose weight due to my life style.

regulars at the gym were starting to laugh at me openly, cause my muscles are very strong but i never lost any fat, and it was demeaning 'but she looks so fat!'

i started binge eating to the point of wanting to throw up and feeling toxic, and i started taking laxatives and thinking about throwing up as a solution, luckily i never did.

i was obsessive about the way i looked, sometimes spending 4 hours getting ready, and then just not going out at all. sometimes i couldnt go downstairs and see my housemates. i still do that. i wait for them to leave the kitchen so i can get food. if they see me eat, i feel guilt.

i went to maybe 6 uni lectures this year, cause everytime i got up, i "knew" id get laughed at and judged, and talked about. and i still do, damn paranoia.

all the new clothes i bought would stretch within a couple of days, so i just wore baggy black tshirts. i have piles of clothes which i used to wear but cant fit into anymore, including a pair of jeans which look small now though i remember thinking i was really fat at the time.. now that was my wake up call for body image distortion.. i was crazy! i was a size 8-10 and athletic and i thought i was ugly and fat! id love to be that size again.

i overheard two aquaintances after i left school saying 'have you seen her, she's gotten really fat! what happened to her?' though considering they all avoided me when i got very depressed, i dont think their opinions matter. in fact, tbh i know i hope that they feel guilt.

my acne had been worsening despite medication and i generally hate it

i was getting chest pains, headaches and eye infections alot, and was always fatigued.. i slept maybe 14 hours a day.

when i dont look after myself physically i get really erratic mood swings

i had to split up with my new bf after 2 months cause my self esteem/agorephobia was causing so many problems, though we're always very good friends, but that was definitely a wake up call for me. a close friend coming to my house at 11pm, crying, saying 'i cant do this anymore, it's too much, you need to support yourself'.
 
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blueberry said:
this is a great thread..

regulars at the gym were starting to laugh at me openly, cause my muscles are very strong but i never lost any fat, and it was demeaning 'but she looks so fat!'
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Thats AWFUL.
I would have reported that to the management immediately. I dont know about your gym, but at mine there are rules about appropriate behavior. Or you could have smashed their faces in with barbells. :reddevil:
 
Jae0 said:
Thats AWFUL.
I would have reported that to the management immediately. I dont know about your gym, but at mine there are rules about appropriate behavior. Or you could have smashed their faces in with barbells. :reddevil:
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i'm not a very conflicting person when it comes to opinions.. they look at life one way, i look at it in another.. but yeah, i should try report it if they do it again and i get upset.
 
When i was walking down the street and some boys came upto me.
They said.. "will you fuck us if we give you a cake." and burst out laughing.
Hurt so much, I just went numb. They just wouldnt leave me alone and kept saying "I heard fat girls give good head." etc, it absoloutly ruined my confidence. Also when I was walking home and a girl and her friends came upto me from school and she punched me in the face, breaking my eye socket. I was in total shock & she said "thats for bein such a fat freak" I was 130lb at the time, but the incident caused me to pile weight on.
 
Am I the only one who notices how funny this thread actually is? I haven't read through it in a while, but I just re-read it a few minutes ago. It seems that most of us have extremely vain and superficial reasons as to why we want to lose weight. Seriously, most of our responses involve the size of our clothes and how we can't fit into them anymore. HAHAHAHA, not our health, or lack thereof, but the size of our jeans!!!

:rotflmao:

I think we have it sooooo ass backwards - and apparently, for most of us, it's an ass that can't fit into our jeans.

No, but seriously, I find it absolutely hilaaaaarious that most of us have that in common; being disgusted with the size of jeans that we wear, etc. I mean, I wonder if we all wore a smaller jean size, but still had the same exact bodies, would we still feel so fat and unattractive? Or, would the mere size on our jean labels make us feel good enough about ourselves to where we didn't feel so fat?

FYI - I am not making fun of anybody. I have vain and superificial motivation to lose weight too; getting a woman to touch me. Sooooo, yeah...I have no room to talk. I'm just pointing out how funny I think it is that most of us are so devastated by the size of jeans we have to buy, so much so, that it motivated us enough to start losing weight and getting healthy.
 
ChefChiTown said:
Am I the only one who notices how funny this thread actually is? I haven't read through it in a while, but I just re-read it a few minutes ago. It seems that most of us have extremely vain and superficial reasons as to why we want to lose weight. Seriously, most of our responses involve the size of our clothes and how we can't fit into them anymore. HAHAHAHA, not our health, or lack thereof, but the size of our jeans!!!

:rotflmao:

I think we have it sooooo ass backwards - and apparently, for most of us, it's an ass that can't fit into our jeans.

No, but seriously, I find it absolutely hilaaaaarious that most of us have that in common; being disgusted with the size of jeans that we wear, etc. I mean, I wonder if we all wore a smaller jean size, but still had the same exact bodies, would we still feel so fat and unattractive? Or, would the mere size on our jean labels make us feel good enough about ourselves to where we didn't feel so fat?

FYI - I am not making fun of anybody. I have vain and superificial motivation to lose weight too; getting a woman to touch me. Sooooo, yeah...I have no room to talk. I'm just pointing out how funny I think it is that most of us are so devastated by the size of jeans we have to buy, so much so, that it motivated us enough to start losing weight and getting healthy.
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Well I have a few superficial goals to losing weight as well, and I truly believe that the ones with these VERY superficial goals, of only fitting into *smaller sized clothing* ect... are the same ones that once they eventually do, will still feel very badly about themselves. Or worse. Usually worse, because they may come to the realization that the fat, losing it or not was never the problem about how they feel about themselves.

That losing it so other's can make you feel better is still a huge problem, noone can do that for you, you have to fix the problem from within. Being self-aware is truly difficult.

Maybe seeing it as losing a clothing size for now is however a good start to becoming more self-aware. It may still be a painful road, but maybe one that can be learned from...

Never the less, it may be someone's goal in the end of becoming healthier and loving themselves more, kind of like a mini-goal reward, and what a nice, warm, fuzzy feeling that can be at times. :)​
 
missfatty18 said:
When i was walking down the street and some boys came upto me.
They said.. "will you fuck us if we give you a cake." and burst out laughing.
Hurt so much, I just went numb. They just wouldnt leave me alone and kept saying "I heard fat girls give good head." etc, it absoloutly ruined my confidence. Also when I was walking home and a girl and her friends came upto me from school and she punched me in the face, breaking my eye socket. I was in total shock & she said "thats for bein such a fat freak" I was 130lb at the time, but the incident caused me to pile weight on.
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wow, that is disgusting behaviour.
 
before my wedding i had about 20 lbs to lose but due to stress i ended up gained that much. my feet and hands swell and i woke up not breathing,my wedding ring hardly fit and my wedding dress zip broke just as i was leaving the house even though i had it taken out a bit, (it was a bit big to start with) and 4 people asked me on my wedding day if i was pregnant! and then came the wedding pictures... i hated them all! only one i thought was decent because i was sitting down and my face didnt look so fat. i was in denial for a long time didnt want to admit to it and always said id lose weight if it affected my health..and it did. i also got stretch marks on my stomach that i never had and didnt get any from pregnancy! i went to the doctor because of the swelling and water retention and he told me you are overweight thats all you have. i pretty much told him ok fine can i go? i cried on the way home then decided to make a change.
i went on a diet and for the first time in my life was doing great! a month passed then i got pregnant :p i didnt gain much with the pregnancy even lost some from beeing sick at the begining and my son is now 4 months i went back to my diet and have since lost 30 pounds, for a month i went of it but didnt gain at all and now im back to it losing fast, i wouldnt call it a diet though because i just eat one meal a day and have no snacks. i know its not healthy but it works for me and if i eat a bit more i just stay the same weight. i refused to weigh myself for years and years even at the doctors office i told him not to ever mention how much i am because i know it will make me depressed so i bought a scale that has lbs kg and stones, i know kg's very well lbs kind of well and stones not at all so i weigh myself using stones! im currently 14 stones at 5'7 im pretty sure i know what it is in pounds but i dont want to know for sure!! so far i havent seen a difference at all really but in determined to get back to thin, i havent been thin since i was 14 because i never noticed i was gaining weight then i tried to convinse myself i was still beautiful but i avoid any people i know especially from high school and dread pictures especially videos but now i want them so i can compare to when im thin!
hope i dont get pregnant again!
 
It was when my physician actually told me I was obese, instead of just using the word overweight. I realize the difference is just a matter of definition, but it made me realize that I was not just in a steady state of being overweight, but actually gaining weight and getting worse over the course of a few years. That forced me to think about exactly how much weight I had gained, and I realized that it was a preventable result of my lifestyle and I needed to start putting serious effort into reducing my weight.
 
When I was out looking for a new pair of jeans from my favorite store and realized I wore their largest size. I didn't really notice I was packing on the pounds until my "fat jeans" were REALLY tight and I needed the next size up- Which Express doesn't sell! I just about died when I realized I was almost unable to wear the clothes I love the most. 4 years ago I was buying size 9 jeans... And that's what I'm working to get back to now.

Size 7 or 5 would be ideal.
 
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