Weight Loss Journal

Ok the evening is going alright.... I kinda snacked though, and I think it was a bit too much. It's probably just all in my head though.

2 handfulls of Kernels Cheesy Dill popcorn
approximately 3 Doritos

I was definately going to eat more and then I said to myself "if I eat anymore, it's going to reallllly show on the scale tomorrow and I'll feel like crap" so I stopped.

Oh and I had a vodka and water with a little bar lime. Long story short: tried to catch the early train... but it didn't exist. 30 minutes to kill in a place full of food and one bar. Avoided the food and got one drink. It was about 65 cals so thats not too bad.

I really want to walk but I think I'm going out for a bit tonight. Maybe at 11?
 
July 14, 2008

I came on here yesterday to mention my horrible day of eating, but my computer got messed up and the post didn't post. So here's what happened. I ate horribly. For breakfast I went to Bobby's and got this thing called the weekender. 3 eggs, 2 bacon, 2 sausage, ham, home fries, 2 pancakes, and 2 pieces or texas toast. All that was left was one fry and one pancake. I don't know what I was thinking. And notice that I ate the meat?? Absolutely no self control. For dinner I went to East Side Marios and I had garden salad, a couple pieces of bread, and asparagus and ricotta cappaletti (sp?). I couldn't finish even half of my meal cus I was still full from breakfast. I have the leftovers for lunch today. I didn't want to go on the scale this morning because I knew that the number would have JUMPED... but I did anyways. 138.2. I'm not really too concerned. The number will probably be down to 136.X tomorrow morning again. I'm just hoping to see 134-ish by the end of the week. No more rediculous splurging like that for at least another month. And no more meat for a while (I'm having a super hard time with this).

Saturday I ate well. I drank a shit load of wine, but thats alright. Just jumped back on the bandwagon today and will do well all week. I went to the gym today and had a good workout. I felt really lazy and almost didn't do all of my run, but I forced it out.

Meals today:

Breakfast: Fibre One Honey Oat Clusters w/ skim milk and strawberry-banana yogurt - 330 cals
Snack: Crispy Delights caramel drizzle - 90 cals
Lunch: Left over East Side Marios - 700 cals?
Snack: Orange - 86 cals
Dinner: Salad - Approx 250 cals

Total: 1600 cals

Now seeing how many cals that past is, I'm probably not going to finish it all. Oh yea... yesterday I also had a bagel with light cream cheese and snacked on chips throughout the day.

Update: I didnt eat about 200 cals worth of lunch because I didn't want to consume so many calories. So new total for today is about 1400. Much more likeable number imo.

Going to try to get a good walk in today so my weigh-in for the challenge tomorrow is not too high.
 
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July 15, 2008

Oh my God I am a walking zombie today. I debated extremely going to the gym this morning, or on my lunch, or after work. I went this morning remembering that I'd be locked out of my office if I didn't. The girl didn't show up today till 9:20 and I got here at 9:10!! so I was still locked out of my office. Good effin thing I went. She better not make a habit of that or I'll have to get a key... then I have no more excuses to go to the gym (not that I'll stop going). Anyways, I struggled through my workout. I upped all my weights to 30 lbs instead of 25, and I wanted to do HIIT today but didnt have it in me, so instead I upped the speed to 6.5 mph for the last 5 minutes.

I went for a nice 45 minute power walk with my mom yesterday, and was happy to see the scale is back down to 136.4. Thanks goodness!!! If it were any higher I would have been chucking it against the wall or something. But it's not the scales fault if my weight is higher, so why would I punish it??

I don't really want to get into great detail about this issue, but since being off the detox, I am having trouble....ummm.... in the bathroom if you will. It's driving me fricking crazy. I'm thinking that my body has adjusted to my current fibre intakes and I need to up it or something. Or maybe it's from eating any for of white carbs now (pasta from east side, pancakes and taters from bfast). I don't know, but I'm hoping it's just going to correct itself. I've had a coffee this morning to see if that helps... well enough about this....... la la la laaaa (such an awkward topic).

Meals today:

Breakfast: Fibre One Honey Oat Clusters (mixed with some All-Bran) w/ skim milk and strawberry-banana yogurt - 330 cals
Snack: Half a bag of popcorn (Smart pop) - 130 cals
Lunch: Salmon w. brown rice, broccoli, and low cal salad dressing - 373 cals
Snack: Apple - 81 cals
Dinner: Salad - Approx 250 cals

Total: Approx 1400 cals

I am really amazed at how much fibre and protein popcorn has. 6g of fibre and 4g of protein per half the bag!!
 
July 16, 2008

Ahh another day is here. I am not really sure how I'm feeling this morning... I'll go with a neutral feeling. Not tired, nor really energetic. I didn't go for a walk last night because I don't want my body to think that I need to walk every single night to lose weight. Butttt of course the scale did not budge this morning. So today I went to the gym and I busted out a ferocious workout. I did my weights and my HIIT TRAINING!! I made it to 300 cals burned on that damn mill. Then I went upstairs and I did a serious ab workout. I pushed myself longer and harder than usual because I do NOT want to plateau (even though its only been one day the scale hasn't moved). I can't see myself hitting 134.X by friday and it saddens me, but if I'm in the lower 135 range, I'll be happy I guess.

I packed a completely different lunch today than I usually do. I am sooo full from breakfast. I'll probably take this more often.

Breakfast: 2 pkts weight control oatmeal w/ a little all-bran in it - 340 cals
Snack: Half a bag of smart pop popcorn - 130 cals
Lunch: Brown rice with veggie chili - 425 cals
Snack: 15 cherries - 73 cals
Dinner: Salad - Approx 250 cals

Total: Approx 1400 cals

I want to see if I can find a recipe for like granola bar type things that are super healthy. We'll see.

I am going to be looking all over for a job today for when my co-op ends in September. Something that pays 13/hr at least!!!!
 
Cut them into smaller pieces. Just calculate the nutritional value of everything you put in it and divide by however many pieces you want. You can make them 100 calories, 250 calories, 300... your choice. I plan on making them this weekend and I too will not be cutting into 500+ calorie sections hehe...
 
Darwin, I found this wicked ass recipe that I am going to try. its these bars made of like molasses, low fat butter, raisins, oats, dates, and some nuts. I havent worked out the calories yet but I am going to. They are probably quite low cal.

July 17, 2008

I feel crappy today. Not a sick crappy, but just a depressed crappy. I wont discuss it in this post, but be forwarned that there is a rant post coming sooon. My mom bought pizza last night and I didn't even have a slice. I did have like 2 bites of crust dipped in garlic dipping sauce. I went to the gym today and I decided that I would give my muscles a break and focus more on the cardio side of things. Another thing that lead me to this is my fucking stupid ass scale (scale mentality is really kicking my ass these past couple of days). I ran for 30 minutes and then I walked for 10 at an incline of 15% and 3.7 mph. Mill told me I burned about 465 cals on there, then I went and did my abs. I think that after work tonight I will do my tae bo bootcamp abs. I want these abs to start seriously changing their shape and flattening.

I dont think I really have anything else to write so heres my meals:

Breakfast: Whole wheat Oatmeal bagel w/ light herb and garlic cream cheese and a Fibre One bar (and a coffee w/ skim milk and sweetener)- 350 cals
Snack: Crispy Delights Cinnamon Strusel - 90 cals
Lunch: Brown rice and veggie chili - 425 cals
Snack: Red delicious apple!! - 125 cals
Dinner: Salad and cajun catfish - ~300 cals

Total: ~1500 cals

I'm thinking of going out on lunch and getting me something nice... just to make myself feel better.
 
:rant:

Well... since yesterday I have felt like shit. I feel like my life is so predictable: wake up at 6, workout, work, go home, eat salad, sleep, repeat. I haven't done anything this summer in terms of getting the fuck out of my town and up to a beach or camping. I just feel like I'm wasting my summer away doing absolutely nothing but drinking at my same friends house every weekend and grabbing coke or MDMA and just getting fucking high as a kite. (I am seriously going to be working on cutting that shit out for good). I feel like I'm being deprived of foods that I love lately. When I see a delicious pizza, I can't have any because its too carby for 7:30 at night. When I get to this point of frustration, it is usually when I crack and I just fall off my diet. The scale is not moving and its not helping the situation. Maybe I need to up my calories for a few days and then drop them? Maybe I need to workout more? I don't fucking know anymore.

Another thing that I need to mention to everyone who reads my comments, posts in my thread, and posts in their threads: I am an impulsive thinker. I say things without thinking of the reaction or response I may get. I have Dermatillomania, which is a form of impulse-control disorder (and OCD). I used to have a shopping impulse which has slightly come under control now that I have no money to blow and a 4000 dollar credit card debt. I am super indecisive and I am now beginning to think it's because of two extreme impulses pulling me in opposite directions, and me not knowing which one to pick. Bottom line: I'm impulsive. I have gotten into a couple tiffs with friends because of things that I've said, and I've gotten into huge fights with ex boys because of things I've done without looking at the big picture first. All of my close friends and family usually just ignore my vulgar comments when they come out because they know thats how I am and I can't really just correct the problem myself. I just blurt stupid shit out and then after getting a negative response I think "Oh fuck... I don't think I should have said that."

When I talk to people on this forum, I base how they will take my responses based on the way they write their comments; that's all I have to go by. So I may say things to people and they are like "Ok that was unneccessary and uncalled for" but if you appear to be a joker then I assume you can handle a vulgar comment or two. Some people on here have taken an inappropriate comment I have made and made the best of it. Other people just make me feel like a big fucking idiot. It hurts. I feel like everyone thinks that way about me when one person shows they do. It would just make my life a hell of a lot stress free and worry free if people just don't react or respond to a comment they think is rude, vulgar, or offensive. Example: the other day I said thanks purpleshirt and then wrote (I almost wrote purpleshit). Why did I do that? I acted on impulse, and though it was unneccessary. I wrote it because it was on my mind at that exact time and I felt it was funny. I find lame things funny. Stupid ass corny shit. I have a horrible sense of humour and only 1 of every 100 of my jokes are actually funny. But you know what? I can't do a fucking thing about it. It's how I am and people need to accept it and understand this. So just don't respond and make me look like a total jack ass douche bag because I've said something totally rediculous.

I think I'm done. If anyone actually reads this then kudos. If not, then I've just taken a big weight off of my shoulders in this wonderful diary. Maybe I can go about my day with a smile now!
 
adeon said:
I feel like my life is so predictable: wake up at 6, workout, work, go home, eat salad, sleep, repeat.

I feel your pain. That's my day, just throw in 'take dog for walk' after 'go home'. It sucks and I hate it. I've been in this funk for a while now. Mostly because my wife is really starting the push for kids and fuck me if I can figure out how I'm going to fit THAT in my day the way things are right now. As it is if I get a half hour a day to myself I feel like I've died and gone to heaven.

adeon said:
I feel like I'm being deprived of foods that I love lately. When I see a delicious pizza, I can't have any because its too carby for 7:30 at night. When I get to this point of frustration, it is usually when I crack and I just fall off my diet.

Then add them back in! You can't deprive yourself of everything you love. If you want pizza, get a slice of pizza. Just cut out some food earlier in the day or get in some extra exercise to compensate if you think it's too much. But by all means, if depriving yourself causes you to fall off the diet then isn't that worse than planning for a slice and making it fit into your food for the day? I eat a tonne of shit that I shouldn't. This is a lifestyle change and whatever you do now you have to be able to do for life. I'm not passing up bacon cheeseburgers for the rest of my life so if one presents itself, I will eat it, track it and adjust accordingly.

adeon said:
The scale is not moving and its not helping the situation. Maybe I need to up my calories for a few days and then drop them? Maybe I need to workout more? I don't fucking know anymore.

I see that you're tracking your calories but do you know what your macros are? Calories from fat, carbs and protein? Might be something to check out. FitDay does this for you automagically.

As for the rest of the rant... you have to remember that other people may not know that you have a penchant for blurting things out and without knowing that they may be shocked or offended by some of the things you say. Good job telling people about that and maybe they'll not be so quick to take things personally later.

Good luck with that new granola recipe. I made up the bars in that page I sent you and they're actually pretty f'n good. I was pleasantly surprised.
 
Buddy I can't believe you read that all. You are really awesome. And thanks for all your words. It's nice to have someone try to help you out with problems or bummed out days. From a fellow Caker to another, you are truly the shit :D

As far as macros go. I don't really pay attention to anything other than my calories. But they usually look like this (this is what today looks like)

Fat: 30% (39g)
Carbs: 55% (190g)
Protein: 15% (44g)

The protein is usually in the 15-21% range, because I am a veggie. I doubt this is very good at all. I know my protein needs to be like double, AND I'm having lots today for a regular day (beans for lunch, fish for dinner, my bagel had 7g). I'm thinking of adding fish to every salad for dinner, but I don't know. The reason why I don't really eat any pizza or shit like that during the week is because I will usually have it at some point on the weekend. I'm way less strict on my weekends, but still try to at least have a proper portion of food and healthy snacks. I also don't like eating very carby at night because I will see it on the scale in the morning, guaranteed. With my current scale mentality thats the last thing I need.

And I am not a huge fan of children at allllllll, so I vote for no kids haha. But hey, they may be just what you need. With a child, your life is so unpredictable and each day has a different twist. But, definately you can kiss any free time you have now goodbye.
 
We Canucks have got to stick together, amiright?

Have you thought about adding whey to your diet? It's the best protein going. Many don't know it, but proteins are rated with a Biological Value. The higher the BV the better the protein. Whey is tops followed by eggs, milk, fish, beef, soybeans, rice, whole wheat, corn and beans.

Whey is highly utilized, easy to consume and cheap. A super easy way to top off your protein needs.
 
ACTUALLY!!!!! I have been seriously debating adding whey. I just go to the store and see 25$ a bottle and I don't get it. I should just stop making excuses and get the damn stuff. We used to have it all the time in the house, but now we just don't fit it into our budget. I did buy these protein bar thingies that have like 16g of protein. Mind you they also have zero fibre and 8g of sugar. I've yet to have one, but I will probably incorporate one into my diet tomorrow, and seriously consider getting the whey.
 
First off, Amanda, I'm offended that you think I might be offended by offensive comments. Uhm... no, wait... I'm not... Uhm... Well, I get your sense of humor. Keep making the jokes, it's your diary. Besides, if it gets bad, that's what the delete button is for. :smilielol5:

I wouldn't worry about the scale so much for now. I know that you are a bit frustrated about it not moving much these last few days, but remember how much it dropped last week. That loss is turning permanent. That's a good thing.

I also agree that you need to up your protein. Being a veggie isn't a good enough reason to skip the protein. Egg whites are a great source of protein. Something like 17g per egg. Hard boil a dozen and eat the white and throw out the yolk. Three egg whites and you'll more then double your protein. Eggs are pretty cheap, too. The cereal that I get, Go Lean, has 13g of protein and 11g of fiber. Real good tasting cereal and gets you going. I'll sometimes have that as a late night snack.

I think that for those "bad" foods that you are craving, the pizza, burger, or whatever, it might be a good thing to stay away from them till you are closer to goal. Brad is right that you can incorporate them into your daily calories and they won't impact negitively and you will satisfy your craving, but the danger is when the craving takes control and that leads you to go over. That or you eat the calorie dense food and then you are still hungry because you don't have the calories to spend on the "good" foods.

Lastly, kids are great. Not for all people, especially people who are still finding their way in the world, but I have a blast each and every day from my kids. Two of the best people I've ever met.

So, there are my two cents or so. Have a great rest of the day and keep offending. :smash:
 
Hey Tropsy thanks so much for the response. I read it a couple times cus I liked it.. I dunno why (I'm just crazy like that!)

Yea I need to get over the scale mentality. Today I went on it and it didn't tell me anything pleasing.... so I took measurements of my waist (The part I need to work on most). I was happy with what I saw, and thus I keep on truckin. Protein definately needs to be incorporated more. I am eating a protein bar as we speak! I will buy the whey, or at least look into other options like the egg whites. I don't know if we have the Go Lean cereal up here, but I will have a look. The fibre one has 14g of fibre, but 11 is good enough too, and with all the protein. I am going to not take your advice in terms of staying away from bad foods till I'm closer to goal. Even though I get all winey and poutey during the week, on the weekend I just have a slice of pizza and then I eat healthy for the rest of the day (lots of fruit and stuff for snacks, and a healthy dinner and decently healthy bfast). It's just getting through the week thats tough. But I think that adding fish to my meal every night may really help with the craviings. It made a huge diff with my dinner last night. I appreciate the advice anyways though :)

As far as kids... I don't like em. Not for me, but for many other people. Just my opinion, and I doubt it will ever change lol.
 
July 18, 2008

Alright, onto my journal entry. IT'S FUCKIN FRIDAY!@!!!!! WOOHOOOO!!!!!! I am actually in a very good mood today. I did sooooo much friggin working out yesterday it's not even funny. On top of my hour of cardio at the gym in the morning, I also did my 35 minute Billy Blanks Ab Bootcamp DVD, THEN I went for a 50 minute power walk with my mother. My obliques are sore today, which is a nice missed feeling. I think I will do that tape 2 times a week. BUTTTTT I went on the scale today and it told me that I'm 136.6 lbs...... 4 days in a row. I'm not going to worry about this. Measurements and photos are in a week so I'll let them be the judge. Last time the scale didn't move, I lost 1.25" off my waist! Sooo we'll see.

Went to the gym today and had a great workout with HIIT and the whole shabang. I don't plan on going out tonight because I think we are going up north on saturday and I will be drinking a lot then. I had some fish with my salad last night and it made my dinner 1231356346 times better. I have to do that way more often. Not sure what else to write today, plus I've got some important shit to do.

Meals:

Breakfast: Protein bar and one packet weight control oatmeal - 290 cals
Snack: One packet weight control oatmeal - 150 cals
Lunch: Blue Menu vegetable lasagna w/ 17 cherries - 324 cals
Snack: Red DELICIOUS apple - 125 cals
Dinner: Catfish and salad - ~325 cals

Total: ~1400 cals
 
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I"m glad you're in a better mood today:biggrinjester:

You know I can commiserate with being frustrated with the scale. That damn scale lol. And the cravings. UGH. Every single freaking day I spend an hour fantasizing about food I can't eat. But every time we bust our asses and turn down something, we're getting closer to our goals. It's so easy to get overwhelmed....

Anyway just wanted to pop in and say hi. Sounds like you're doing great. Maybe it's time for a little well deserved treat? In moderation of course lol
 
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