We are what we repeatedly do...

Glad to be back buddy! I'll be annoying you for ever more! I love it when you lose a pound after a pig out, score! If weight loss worked that way, we'd be laughing xx
 
If only!

I'm kinda stressed at the moment. Sort of because of the scariness (totally a word) of third year, sort of 'cause of issues with my old flat mates and probably also (but I don't admit this) because of the period coming soon.

I'm so sick of this old flat mate situation. I used to live with three other girls, two that I met in my first year and my (old) best friend. I volunteered to do all the bills, so they were all my name and that worked out fine until me and my best friend had a huge fall out and the other two girls took her side.

They all basically hate me now, except my best friend who I'm sort of on good terms with... And I still pay for their bills even though I moved out in April to live with my boyfriend instead (double rent sucks but it sucks less than an unbearable living situation with people who hate your guts).

Anyway I'm coming so near to never having to worry about chasing them for money ever again but getting these final bills sorted is just so PAINFUL. They make me feel bad for asking for money that they owe me and I have to constantly chase them and pester them to get anything done. It's so stressful and they're in these degrees where they have loads of spare time and I'm in a degree where I have to be in placement 9 til 5 every weekday MINIMUM!

I guess I've got to think there's people in much more difficult situations out there though and I only have to grin and bare it a little longer and I never have to be in that situation again, but still, I just hate feeling like this mega bitch who constantly has to ask people for money.

Sigh :(

I didn't exercise today either, partly laziness, partly the weather (pouring rain) and partly that I was worried about the stitches in my leg being painful on exertion. That's no excuse for not doing my weights routine though.

The thing that's really making me feel like crying right now is feeling like I have no friends. I have my boyfriend and I spend time with his friends (not many), and one of those has even become a friend of mine in my own right, but that's about it. My best friend and I are just so on the ropes still and my old friends from school, well I just never see them because they're all over the country. I want to see them sometime this month but it's just gonna be one weekend and that'll be it. I barely talk to any of them any more.

A part of me blames myself, for being a crummy friend but another part just feels like sobbing 'cause I know I'm a caring person and I should have friends to share fun times with...

Buh.

My best friend makes no effort with my any more. I've tried to stay in contact with her over summer but she's just been pretty much silent with me. I don't think we're ever going to be how we used to be.

I just hope that maybe I'll make some new friends in my third year placement but I'm not holding out hope - I'm so shy now a days. And kinda cold, without meaning to be - a defence mechanism I guess.

OK so I'm gonna end my massive rant here. Sad day. That's all.
 
I really feel for you as my daughter went through something similar but it was all over one of her best friends nicking her boyfriend and all the others taking the other girls side because they didn't want to break the group up. She ended up starting Uni last year with no friends and as she lives at home it was much more difficult to make friends than when you are all living in digs. Anyway I just wanted to tell you that a year on she has got so many friends that she has problems fitting them all in. I think it will take her a long time to trust girls completely again as she has had so many problems with them. Last year most of her friends were boys and it's only this summer that she has met so many new girlfriends.
And no you aren't being a bitch at all. Why should you subsidise people that barely even talk to you.
You just carry on being a nice person and you'll soon have plenty of friends just wait for decent people, don't just make friends for the sake of having them.
 
Hey! I just wanted to stop by and show some support! I especially LOVE your title-- it's so true! I just want to BREAK the habit of doing what I always do...eugh,

Yeah I've made it a BAD habit of going to popeyes once a week for their 2 piece tuesdays, best deal EVER.

Good luck with your goals!!
 
Thanks for the words of support Val, it helped.

I felt a little better today but only managed 30 minutes of exercise, I felt a little disappointed in myself after such a great week last week but tomorrow's another day!

I did get in my 25g of fibre though :)

I'm so tired so I think this is all I'm gonna say for today.
 
Aww Holly that post made me sad! Hope you're feeling a bit better chicken. Not to sound corny but we are your friends hehe. I know it's only in cyber world, but regardless we'll be here to read about your ups and downs and offer any support. If you're a nice person which undoubtedly you are, friends will come. Just try not to put all your eggs in one basket with your boyfriend, we've all been guilty of that!

This rain is shoddy!!! I'm not enjoying my impromptu runs to the car, or to the shops, or anywhere really. Impromptu running without a sports bra and trainers is so not a good look for me lol. Well done for getting some exercise in today. Lots of love x
 
Wow your posts remind me so much of me sometimes! When I was in Uni I went through 9 different roommates and I always had the bills in my name too so I totally understand how frustrating it can be to ask people for money - even though they obviously owe it to you!
I also lost my best friend in Uni over something silly and sadly we were never able to fully move past it and return to the awesome friendship we had - I miss her tons but I know it will never be the same and I have moved on.
I'm also friends with all my husband's friends and the good thing is now I'm becomming friends with their wives or girlfriends. I find it does become harder to make friends once you are older - like the kind of friend you can call up "just because". I find I call my mom now for those times or my sisters.
Anyway I'm sorry I don't really have encouraging words to say but I can totally relate if that helps any.
Cheer up and just think - at least you have your boyfriend to turn to - some people dont' even have that! I hope you feel better soon.
 
It sounds like we're a lot a like, that's actually very ressuring at the moment thank you.

I pretty much rely on my mum and sister for those kinds of calls too now :) They're great but it would also be nice to have at least one good girlfriend to confide in.

Anyway, I've had another down day but managed to do 2 hours exercise and keep to my calories, so far. Also, my bf and I had a long chat about why I find some things hard to deal with and that helped a lot. I think I've just got to improve on my coping skills in certain situations.
 
Oops didn't post here for a couple of days. I've been much happier in the last two days though so that's great :D

News... Well I'm almost under 13 stone (I'm gonna be so happy to see the number 12 again!), which is exciting and I had a yummy pork chop supper last night and I'm having beef casserole tonight. Food's been good but exercise not so great, although I have still reached my minimum of 30minsx5 this week so not SO bad.

I'm finding everything pretty easy and enjoyable at the moment. I think it's cause me and my bf are making so many new recipes - it keeps things fresh and interesting. I hate when healthy eating feels like a chore and that ususally has me reaching for take away in no time at all :rollseyes:

I'm starting back at university on Tuesday where I'll be on my first placement, scary but also exciting... but mostly scary. It also means I'm gonna have to get into the routine of preparing packed lunches, which is gonna be a little bit of a nightmare lol but oh well.

I've got a plan to cut my calories down to 1400kcal - 1500kcal and have the weekends free to make my life a little simpler. Not free as in I can eat whatever I want but free as in I'll try to eat as I would when I'm counting calories (weighing portions, keeping fats low and sweet things to a minimum) but without actually logging my calories, just to give myself a break from all the numbers stuff.

I think one day of the weekend I might also have a moderate 'cheat' meal.

Anyway, just ideas really... I'll just have to see how things go in practise.
 
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Hey you,

I think the idea of having a cheat meal or cheat day if you can calorifically afford it is a great idea. If i know that on Friday night I can have a chinese and a glass of wine, I'll be good up until then and look forward to it. In theory anyway, I will put these sorts of things into place when I live on my own. As it stands, living with mum is a dietary nightmare hehe.

Don't worry too much about not doing exercise exactly as you planned to. Life gets in the way much of the time and that's the way it goes. Just do what you can and remember that slow is good. If it takes you two years to get to target (which it won't) then it still is only a tiny fraction of your life and leaves you with a good long life to enjoy your success. However if you lose it in two months, you'll most likely put it back on and get stuck in the dreaded yo-yp dieting pattern.

So a massive well done, you're doing so well hunny! Keep it up x
 
Thanks Pip :) I sympathise with you by the way - I found it near impossible to lose weight when I was to living at home!

Today was good mostly because I fit into some size 14 trousers, when the other day I was feeling tight in some size 18s. I know I haven't lost 2 sizes in a few days but mentally I'm pleased I'm not an 18 on bottom, or at least not in all shops. Silly shops - such fickle sizes!

We had pork and veggie kebabs on rice tonight - more yumminess.

First day of university tomorrow - arggghh!! It's not in placement though but just an introductory day in the lecture theatre instead.

Me and the bf planned out the next week's meals tonight and did an online shop to buy all the food we needed. I'm really pleased we're doing this tactic because it makes keeping on track a million miles easier.

I best get an early night now - night night!
 
Exercise pts:

S: 0
M: 0.5 bike ride
T: 0.5 weights and stretches
W: 1 bike ride
T: 0.5 weights
F: 0
S: 0
 
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Well today was tiring but overall not so bad, I'm almost excited about the year ahead.

My calories today were a little higher than usual but only by about 200kcals so I'm not going to be hard on myself and call that a bad day because it's not!

I'm feeling very positive about life in general and the moment and I'm trying to take this opportunity to grow and improve myself. I would type more detail on this but I better go do my weights before I forget/get too lazy! :)
 
My week has gone well Uni wise but my calories have gone up by a few 100 every day, I think I'm just more hungry cause of TOM - I'm definitely craving sweet things more.

Exercise has been pretty pants, I've done my bare minimum for the week but I didn't do anything yesterday and to be honest I doubt I'll do much today.

I also think I might be going out tonight, which means alcohol, and having a meal with friends tomorrow, which means calories!

I'm not totally sure what to do about these issues cause I'm almost under 13 stone and I don't want to spend another week getting back to this point cause I've eaten/drank too much.

I guess I'm gonna aim for maintenance calories and try to do some exercise, maybe tennis, tomorrow morning.

Can't wait til TOM is over!
 
Same here, I'm having so many house guests at the moment that I am just concentrating on maintaining my weight and then when things calm down I'll really get the food completely under control and hopefully lose a bit more weight.
 
Val - such is life eh? I think learning to handle these things is a huge part of overcoming weight problems - I'm sure you know that even better than I do though 'cause you're so close to your goal!

OK so despite the weekend's drinking and meal out, I think I more or less managed to stay within maintenance calories and I have in fact lost a lb. I had lost 3 lbs but that was probably because I was sick on Sunday morning! This morning it had leveled back at 13 stone exactly and I'm hoping it stays there!

Other news? Well University has been going great, I'm finding placement very interesting and I feel super enthusiastic about taking histories from patients and doing examinations.

It's a little annoying that I couldn't help but notice today that I'm probably the second biggest girl on my course - I guess being a skinny minny is just the medical student way for most people.

Oh well - if I keep my hard work up I could be a size 10 in 6 months and I wouldn't have to feel out of place.

I've had the genius, although probably kinda obvious, idea that I should walk to placement instead of taking the bus. I could do with saving the money and it'll add an extra 1hr-1.5hrs total of walking to my daily routine most days.

Anyway, I'm going for a bike ride now and then I'm going to make casserole for tea tonight and later on I'm going to fix together the stuff I'm sending down to my niece to secure my first 'good deed' challenge point :)
 
Exercise pts + good deed pts

S: 0 + 0
M: 0.5 + 0
T: 1 + 0 (walk)
W: 0.5 + 1 (bike ride)
T: 1.5 + 0 (walk and weights)
F: 1 + 1
S: 0 + 1

Good deeds:
1) Sent my niece a package including stickers and a picture for her to colour in :)
2) Sent a friend, who's living away from home and doesn't have many friends in his new home, a letter to cheer him up
3) Bought a Big Issue from a seller I've always appreciated for his good nature but have never actually bought a copy from before.
 
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I've been in some funny moods the last 2 days. I've been happy enough whilst at university, I'm enjoying learning all the new clinical techniques and all, but I seem to get really tired/overwhelmed when I get home.

I actually started sobbing the other day 'cause our flat was too untidy for my liking and I felt unable to do any of the washing, ironing and other stuff that needed doing. I get so overfaced sometimes, just by the tiniest things. I'm quite a neurotic person.

Aside from that, well, I'm finally under 13 stone (12stone 12) but my calories have been kinda on the high side for a week or so now. I'm going to try and keep them under 1600kcal now though.

I did my first walk to and from placement, which is 40 minutes both way and burns a total of 540kcals so hopefully that'll help cut down the calories too :)

I finally got round to putting together the package for my niece today, I'm kinda bothered that I put it off for so long but I'm gonna let myself off 'cause of my funny moods.

I'm not sure what else to say, not feeling very chatty.
 
Congrats on being under 13 stone! I know that's been a goal for a while now. And it's great that you've adding the walking in there, that'll help keep the calories in check. Good for you!
 
Sorry to hear that you have been a bit down and hope that you are soon feeling better. Hugs
congrats on being under 13 stone.
 
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