walk up in the world & cut the lights off / confidence is a stain they can't wipe off

SoCoSideshow

New member
I probably don't have enough pull around here to have my own weight loss diary, but words will always be insurmountably important to me, and I feel like this might be a good outlet.

I can't quite shake this feeling that all of these people in my life congratulating me and doling out compliments really understand what I'm doing. I am, of course, appreciative of these things (and sort've on a confidence kick for probably the first time in my life), but I feel I don't have anybody I can get into a solid conversation with it about, because outside of my mother (who is, frankly, too tired to talk about it), I don't personally know anyone who is dieting at the moment (save from stick-sized coworkers who weigh 98 pounds but still swear their ass looks fat).

Sometimes I feel like maybe I'm making too big of a deal out of losing weight, and the changes I've tried to make in my lifestyle, but other days, I'm like, 'Go ahead, girl. Make a big deal. You've earned it.'

I couldn't have done a year ago what I'm doing now; I think that's important to remember for myself.

Anyway. Light breakfast this morning, and a moderate lunch this afternoon (meatball mozzarella Lean Pocket. MMMM <3), because I have the day off of work, and I think that after a light workout this afternoon, I'm going to indulge, if only slightly, and celebrate for hitting the 60 pound mark today; wooh!

Gotta keep on truckin'.
 
Firstly, congratulations on dropping 60lbs! What an achievement! How much further do you have to go or are you done now? Either way--AMAZING!

Secondly, you don't need to have "pull" around here to have a diary! A lot of people ignore the other sections and come straight here upon joining to make a diary so no worries! Looking forward to seeing you post more and telling us a bit more about yourself and how you did it!
 
Yeah, completely agree with Sunflower...you don't need pull for s diary! Like kevin Costner's baseball movie. ... If you write it...they will come!

Congrats on the loss so far - nearing that myself so I know what a huge achievement it is!!
 
Firstly, congratulations on dropping 60lbs! What an achievement! How much further do you have to go or are you done now? Either way--AMAZING!

Secondly, you don't need to have "pull" around here to have a diary! A lot of people ignore the other sections and come straight here upon joining to make a diary so no worries! Looking forward to seeing you post more and telling us a bit more about yourself and how you did it!

Thank you :)
I guess if I'm pinning an ultimate goal weight (and the loss necessary to reach it), it would be the highest weight within the healthy rage for someone my height... this would require another 48.6 pounds of loss.
But who knows? I don't like to put a final goal on it because I wanna lose weight until I feel good and know that I'm living healthy. I can't say I know what that number is yet, but I'll figure it out as I go along.

Glad to be here; nice to meet you!
 
Sixty pounds is AMAZING, congrats on that! And if you're looking for some people to have solid conversations with about the journey that is weight loss, you have definitely come to the right place. I will wholeheartedly agree with the other ladies and say you don't need to have "pull" to be here!
 
Lost 3.6 pounds this week! Not about to complain about that.
I figure that if I do any indulging at all (and I think every diet designed to keep someone's sanity includes at least a little of it), that it better be over the weekend.

Regardless, the only candy I allowed myself yesterday for Halloween was M&Ms in moderation, because in my opinion, you can't go watch Saw VII in 3-D without them :)

Passed by the giant mirror in the movie theatre's bathroom; didn't say bleh. Definitely a first.
Saw Meghan's boyfriend at the convinience store on Saturday, and he actually said, "WOW. You look great."

I... could get used to this.
 
I'm so close to being under 200 that it's psyching me out a little bit.
I have to keep reminding myself not to stress, or throw my routine out of whack for the sake of reaching a goal before its meant to be reached.
Wish me luck!

Below: A quiz found in Willatochange's weight loss diary; I like it a lot.

The quiz

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What is your current height and weight? -
I am currently 5'6.5", and weigh 205 pounds.

If you were at an ideal weight now, what would that weight be?
I find it very difficult to pinpoint an ideal weight (and therefore an ultimate goal) because I don't think number in pounds is necessarily completely indicative of health, or happiness and body comfortability. I've checked out a few sites that claim I should be around 160 pounds at my particular height and body structure, so for now, that's my aim.

At what weight would you like to be at four months from now?
If I were between 170 and 180 within the next four months, I would be very happy. I don't feel I'm taking weight off at a dangerous pace, and have lost 63.6 pounds since the end of June 2010, so I think this goal is feasible.

Why do you want to lose weight?
I would be lying if I said I started losing weight for myself. I STARTED losing weight to prove everybody wrong, and I don't necessarily feel like that's a negative thing. It was a push. No, it was a shove, and that's what I needed to get going. Now, I want to lose weight because I'm a good person. I'm worthy of living a comfortable, happy, healthy life, even though it will probably always take a good deal of determination and discipline.

Do you want to lose weight for a specific life event such as wedding or reunion?
None in particular at the moment -- I began dieting 6 weeks prior to my uncle's wedding, lost 30 pounds before the wedding, and felt I looked great in my dress. I now feel I looked a lot bigger at that wedding than I do now, and I think I'm going to look forward to comparing last year's holiday pictures to this years :)

What obstacles could get between you and your weight loss goals?
Sloth. Little slip-ups. My tendency to over-do it on the alcohol. The convinience of fast, cheap food.

Why do you think that you now have a weight problem?
I feel disgusted even trying to blame my weight problem on my mother, but the fact of the matter is, I grew up in a household of fast-food and TV dinners. My parents never cooked, never pushed vegetables or encouraged nutritious choices. Those sort of habits become ingrained after awhile, and though I've been old enough to make my own decisions for quite some time, I always found the habits too difficult to break.

What lifestyle changes do you think would help you lose weight?
I spent four months on the Weight Watcher's program -- weekly weigh-ins taught me to be accountable for my progress, because I never wanted to go into a weigh-in NOT having lost weight. The points system is a godsend -- I don't pay for weigh-ins anymore, but still use the Points system pretty religiously, and it's working wonderfully. Additionally, after winning a 2-year gym membership in June, I went from virtually no exercise to going to the gym 3-5 times per week. Eat less, move more!

Have you lost weight in the past? If so, what has worked in the past to help you lose weight?
Prior to my current weight loss journey, I have lost a noteable amount of weight at one other point in my life. I used the Weight Watcher's points system for about 3 months when I was 15 years old, and lost about 30 pounds.

Why do you believe that you did not lose weight or you gained the weight back?
I don't recall the point at which I fell off of the WW wagon back in high school, I'm sure it was gradual. I began drinking pretty heavily in my junior and senior years of high school, and gained a great deal of weight my freshman year of college, between booze and cafeteria dessert.

Would you try writing down all food and drink consumed for a given period of time?
For the first month on Weight Watcher's this time around, I wrote down all of my daily intake in terms of 'points', and while I no longer do this regularly, its a tool I use when I start to slip on my diet these days.

Do you cook at home often? If so, what do you cook?
I am the opposite of a cook. I can't make anything besides chocolate chip cookies. I'm very big into the Lean Cuisine/Smart Ones microwave stuff; much easier and more delicious than my attempt to cook.

How often do you go out to eat? Where do you go?
I am grateful to be on a diet that allows me to continue to eat fast food. I'm a big fan of Subway, as well as a lot of the grilled chicken and fish stuff at McDonalds.

What are your three favorite foods?
I adore Mexican food (all of it), chicken, and pistachios.

What are your three favorite restaurants?
Los Amigos, Main St., and Empire Buffet

What are three things you can do differently when it comes to food?
Eat LESS -- I simply cannot give up fatty, sweet foods that I love. That sounds like a miserable way to live, so I simply eat less.
Make BETTER choices -- It isn't until I started doing my research that I realized that there are plenty of good-AND-good-for-you foods out there.
DIET soda -- I've converted.

If you woke up tomorrow and your body was exactly the way you want it, what would be different?
I would be so CONFIDENT. I'm finding more and more, as this weight comes off, that I am not the cynical, careless, standoffish person I've spent almost all of my life being -- I'm a bubbly, playful, flirty little girl trying to make the most out of being young and happy. I know that the better I do for myself, the easier it is to like myself, and the easier it is for everyone else too, as well.

Do you eat when you are not hungry?
I used to. I fight off the temptation on occasion -- if it's something that for some reason I cannot fight, I've turned to Extra's Dessert Delight gum to stop the nag -- chocolate chip mint icecream, sugarfree? YUM.

Do you binge eat (large amounts at a time)?
Again, I used to. I get disgusted thinking about the foods I'd bring home from the drive-thru, like, "How could I have POSSIBLY eaten so much in one sitting?"

Do you hide your food or eat in secret?
I also used to hide food. I'd order big bags of fast food and hide them under my coat, sweatshirt, in my giant purse, etc. to sneak them up to my room, because my mom had started to become concerned with how much fast food I was eating. Now, the only food I have to hide are the 100-Calorie packs that my non-dieting little brother can't keep his hands off of.

Do you eat when you are sad, nervous, or depressed?
I can't be certain that I ever identified that -- my eating seemed more a result of boredom than any other emotion.

Do you eat as a reward?
If I have a good week of weight loss, I let myself splurge a little bit. I think food is meant to be enjoyed; I don't ever want to be in the confines of a diet that doesn't allow me to enjoy food.

Do you eat while watching TV or using the computer?
Bad habit. We never had a dining room table growing up in my house; we ate on the floor or the couch, right in front of the TV.

Where do you go for exercise? A local public gym? School/work gym? Home?
I use a gym membership a few times per week -- I was lucky enough to win one about the time I made the decision to start dieting. I have a tredmill at home that I use on occasion, and I've been doing more and more neighborhood walking, though the increasingly cold weather is making it more difficult.

What is your daily/weekly/monthly/yearly motivation to move towards your goals?
Daily: I've been slacking a bit this week; time to kick it up so I don't slip up!
Weekly: Going out this weekend -- every pound counts!
Monthly: Haven't dieted during a holiday season in my life. Get your research done early!
Yearly: LET YOUR 22ND YEAR OF LIFE BE THE FIRST YEAR OF YOUR BRAND NEW ONE!!

Do you have rewards for certain goals?
My favorite rewards: A night out with the ladies, new cute jeans, a top I finally feel comfortable wearing
 
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Cool set of questions, might give it a go myself. Good luck with the remainder of your endeavours, SoCo :D
 
I haven't yet determined if the holidays this year are going to be difficult, or a real luxury.
It's the first time I've ever been on a diet while tunneling through the holidays. However, it's also the first year that I'm spending both Thanksgiving and Christmas at home with just my immediate family, and therefore have a greater input in what gets put on the table.

My mom and I are already making plans and mapping out Thanksgiving, because it will undoubtedly be a tough one.
We're doing corn instead of stuffing, which I personally think sounds better anyway.
Now we just have to find a good/good-for-you dessert.

If all else fails, I'll grab a WW ice cream bar while everyone else enjoys something fatty and delicious -- doesn't bother me a bit!

PS - In another 2 pounds, I will officially be UNDER 200 for probably the first time since I was 15.
WOW.
 
The scale was wavering between 199 and 200 yesterday... WOW. That felt pretty incredible.
I don't think I'm going to change my ticker until I'm a couple pounds down... "safely" in the 100-something's... or at least until my "official" Saturday weigh-in.

I'm hittin' the gym hard today to make up for a little bit of slack last night... I can't watch Sunny in Philly and NOT have a couple drinks; it's pure disrespectful!

I also can't remember the last time that a day passed where I haven't had someone in my social life approach me and tell me how great I look.
And I don't consider myself to be a vain person, but after years of hiding in the shadows, and almost 6 months of concentrated effort, I gotta say... it feels really, really amazing :)
 
SoCo, I checked out your diary so far. You are doing amazing things, I give you a ton of credit for doing this the way you are. also...

I can't quite shake this feeling that all of these people in my life congratulating me and doling out compliments really understand what I'm doing. I am, of course, appreciative of these things (and sort've on a confidence kick for probably the first time in my life), but I feel I don't have anybody I can get into a solid conversation with it about, because outside of my mother (who is, frankly, too tired to talk about it), I don't personally know anyone who is dieting at the moment (save from stick-sized coworkers who weigh 98 pounds but still swear their ass looks fat).

Sometimes I feel like maybe I'm making too big of a deal out of losing weight, and the changes I've tried to make in my lifestyle, but other days, I'm like, 'Go ahead, girl. Make a big deal. You've earned it.'

I totally get this. I was apparently making my family crazy by talking about the gym, or losing weight or how good I was feeling, people were getting sick of it, so I came here so that other people who knew what we were going through could be the support system.
 
SoCo, I checked out your diary so far. You are doing amazing things, I give you a ton of credit for doing this the way you are. also...



I totally get this. I was apparently making my family crazy by talking about the gym, or losing weight or how good I was feeling, people were getting sick of it, so I came here so that other people who knew what we were going through could be the support system.

I'm the same. My hubby's had a gutfull of me talking about it and I can tell it's irritating him but he doesn't say anything. Thanks god for this forum hey?

Congrats on your awesome job so far SoCo!

I understand what you mean about your Mum, my Mum is fantastic but was a food/chocolate addict when I grew up. She made food a reward for everything so it does stick with you. I'm just trying not to do it to my kids...
 
I also can't remember the last time that a day passed where I haven't had someone in my social life approach me and tell me how great I look.
And I don't consider myself to be a vain person, but after years of hiding in the shadows, and almost 6 months of concentrated effort, I gotta say... it feels really, really amazing :)

This SHOULD feel amazing, so happy to hear you're getting a well-deserved confidence boost! You don't have to be vain to appreciate a good compliment. You earned them!
 
SoCo, I checked out your diary so far. You are doing amazing things, I give you a ton of credit for doing this the way you are. also...



I totally get this. I was apparently making my family crazy by talking about the gym, or losing weight or how good I was feeling, people were getting sick of it, so I came here so that other people who knew what we were going through could be the support system.

Thank you; I much appreciate that.
It really is amazing here.
Supportive, which helps, considering there will always be a litany of people in the real world trying to bring good people down, regardless of their efforts to make positive changes.

So, thanks everyone! :)
 
Hadn't seen my freshman year roommate in a few months up until last night; we celebrated our being-21-with-no-Monday-plans together and grabbed some dinner. I sincerely do not have the stomach for these things anymore!

I'm sure the 14-episode marathon of How I Met Your Mother that I dove into when I got home didn't help the matter.

Stepped on the scale for "official weigh-in" on Saturday... 199. Holy WOW.
I know I'll feel better as I inch further and further away from the 200-anythings, because it has been such a very, very long time since I've been there.

This job hunt thing is moving kind of slow, but I'm only getting 20-25 hours at my current job, and thus have more time to commit to getting in better shape.
I need to start weight training. No more slacking!

P.S. - A very, very highschool-esque announcement but I ran into Scott Hot Body (who left the restaurant I work at 6 months ago, before I started dieting) on Saturday, and he told me I looked great
:blush5:

And yes, I beamed just like that.
 
I'm 21 as well and started off at just over 200lbs so I get you on the "getting under 200" feeling! Was such a massive deal for me :) Hopefully next week will see you settled under 200 for good. Have a good day darling!
 
Forum friends, you're gonna have to tell me if this is evil, because I don't trust my own palet, because I'm a fairly evil person in general.

I really wanna crank out my workouts and step up my dieting before December 18th, because that will be the first time I've seen the uncles and aunts on my Dad's side of the family in months.

His two sisters are these very judgmental, very twiggy little stuck up soccer moms who have rarely done better than give me a back-handed compliment on anything in my life. It may sound bad, but I would kinda like to stick it to 'em, just once. I'm gonna need some input on whether or not that's evil.

A bit sore today; might just hit up the bike instead of the elliptical. It is going to be a LONG week.

Also, most recent facebook status?
"Oh my god, Mom, you should have seen the guy that smiled at me on the way out of work tonight. And it wasn't a 'Here's a smile because I'm a friendly person' smile, it was a 'Hey shawty, let's head back to my place with a six pack and make some bad decisions' smile. He looked like the guy from Prison Break. Talk about a non-scale victory."

Cheers!
 
Kind of a messy workout week; this past one. I felt bloated and blah the entire time, but I forced myself to go in and work out three times anyway. I suppose if I don't push, nobody else will.
And despite how bloated and blah I still felt at the end of the week, I had lost 4 pounds :) Can definitely live with that.

Mom and I went out yesterday and got everything we need for Thanksgiving; I think I'm going to spend an hour or so the night before budgeting my food and tracking, so that I don't have to do it when I'm sitting on the couch with a beer watching the Lions lose on my day off. I think a moderate Thanksgiving has the opportunity to be moderately delicious.

Weekend pick-me-ups:

-Tried on this gorgeous two-piece dress-suit sort of thing that belongs to my mom, in the event that I'm summoned to any Christmas parties of any kind, and I cannot remember the last time I wore something and felt so shapely and thin. It was the greatest.


-Bought an adorable new winter coat because my ratty one from last year doesn't even come close to fitting me.

-Stopped by the convinience store today to pick up a fountain pop -- a girl that has been working there for a year and a half, but has been on leave for a couple of months, dropped her jaw and said, "You are wasting away. You look amazing." She was also the first person to comment on my weight loss, who didn't already know that I was dieting (probably about 30 pounds into it). I have a feeling she will be an iconic figure in my weight loss story, whenever it comes to an end :)

Everyone have a good one!
Thanksgiving is delicious, but it has the potential to be hazardous; be careful!
 
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