unhealthy and nagged to death noob

[Octavious]

Greetings,
I stumble to this forum using a search engine and thought i would post to see if you all could help. I am a 40 something year old male about 6 foot 8 inches and over 400 pounds. I have always been chunky but in the last 3-4 years have put on way too much weight. It has physicaly started effecting me lately. My back has started hurting, my knees have been sore ect.. the real reason i have come to be so sad as hit has gotten to my wife much more. we have been married 17 years and have three kids. she has been nagging me about my weight so much that the physical part is gone and we are drifting apart. I say I love her and she says "not enough to lose some weight". i do admit all my weight promises have been empty ones.

where do I start?

 

[pktull]

Where to start?

That is a difficult question as there are myriads of starting places. You will find answers that say, "eat less, exercise more." Well, duh! Sometimes that is easier said than done. Ultimately that is where you will need to arrive.

You have made the best start and that is seeking help and support. I wasn't near 400, but my health was suffering and there were certain things I couldn't do any more. I started using a weight loss system and a healthy energy drink to get me started. I went from laying on the couch to walking 6 miles in the mornings. I have now joined a fitness club and I am doing weight training.

If you told me back in July before I started that I would be doing weight training at a fitness club and would be walking 6 miles, I would have told you that the lie you just said came straight from the pits of hell.

You will find all kind of support and encouragement. You will see what everybody is doing. You will need to find what will work with you and your body to get you started. The main thing to remember is to never stop once you start.

 

[happy_squid]

Hi Octavius!

My boyfriend is a big guy too- 6'7 and somewhere near 300 and counting. We are both concerned about what his health (and look) may be in the future. He's active, but just so large!
My best advice for your health, and to bring you and your wife closer together- is to get active together. That is what we're doing. Whether your wife is attracted to you physically or not, she is attracted to the idea of you doing something about it. I'd sit down with her and talk about what you need from her if this is going to happen. If she's concerned, she'll get involved and support you. Two is better than one, unless it's a cheeseburger!

 

[wimic]

Hey Octavious,

I'm sorry to hear about your problem. The first thing I'll say is that ridicule is not the way to encourage someone. You need to explain to her that her nagging you isn't going to help. In fact, from my experience, it makes things worse.

As for where to start - I'm asking myself the same question right now. I'm a 23 year old, who just graduated from university and who is in despirate need of a lifestyle change. I recently moved to a new city and am just not feeling good about myself now. I don't want to hit my 30's and realize that I have a bunch health problems that are caused by being overweight. So here's what I came up with...

1) Start out at your own pace. Join the gym (I know it can kind of suck having to hop on the treadmill next to a hard-bodied sexpot, but you're not there to impress anyone are you?... at least that's what i keep telling myself! ). Don't be discouraged if you can only walk for 10 or 20 minutes. It's a starting point. You will build endurance really fast.

2) Steer Clear of junk/fatty/take-out-type foods. There's always a healthy alternative these days. Although, beware that a lot of "healthy" food alternatives contain hidden fats and carbohydrates. ie. at mcdonalds - if you have a caesar salad, you may have as well bought a big mac - the caesar salad dressing contains almost 20g of fat!!

3) Believe in yourself. Set realistic goals and KNOW that you can reach them. It's all in your head - the doubts, the imaginary hunger (you know what I'm talking about... I get it all the time - wanting to eat because you're bored or depressed... or how about this one... this is my favorite (lol)... eating to celebrate!). I've found every reason in the world to eat... and if you're anything like me, this is a big problem.

Anyways... I don't mean to sound like a therapist... God knows I have just as much fear and doubt and hurt inside me as you do right now... but I really think that just being connected with everyone on this site is a great start. I'm really looking forward to hearing about your progress.

Good luck with it!

Wendy