UncoverBeauty's Journey Home
- Thread starter UncoverBeauty
- Start date
Curvie Girlie
New member
Glad to have you back!!!
I like your stats and your plans. I'm really pleased you're going to go out running!!!
Have a great day and stick around, K?
I like your stats and your plans. I'm really pleased you're going to go out running!!!
Have a great day and stick around, K?
UncoverBeauty
New member
Sorry folks!
My day at the gym went really good, I've been going everyday this week so far, boy can I say, it feels good =)
I must say tho, I gaind 6pounds since I strayed from my diet and I'm trying to work my butt off to get it off.
I'm sort of struggling with getting back onto eating right again, it's just not working, mentally that is. I can't seem to get back into the right frame of mind =/
My day at the gym went really good, I've been going everyday this week so far, boy can I say, it feels good =)
I must say tho, I gaind 6pounds since I strayed from my diet and I'm trying to work my butt off to get it off.
I'm sort of struggling with getting back onto eating right again, it's just not working, mentally that is. I can't seem to get back into the right frame of mind =/
UncoverBeauty
New member
Don't Ever Give Up
Okay. I am now doin' try number three. I refuse to give up on this site, and I refuse to give up in general. I keep making promises to myself and I keep breaking them, but you need to jump back on the wagon each and everytime you fall off. Right? Right.
I've finally been put on medication to control my migraines, which has become a constant thing as of late, and this medication will be a twice a day medication for, well, as far as I knw, the rest of my life. It's to help prevent them, I've also been put on one to be taken when I get a migraine in order to just stop it and any others that may surpass the other medication. With that said, I am highly hoping that I can finally feel a certain level of normality for once instead of feeling like crap everyday and not wanting to do anything. The migraine pills also work, for very many people, as an appaitite (sp?) surpressent and cause many people to lose weight and to continue to lose weight throughout the duration of taking the medication, we're highly hoping it'll help a bit.
My wound is healing up; I can basically do whatever now, nothing hurts it really, it's becommin more and more shallow, and one of these months it should totally heal. I'm excited for that.
My weight, I have stayed between 283 and 285 for awhile now, and that's without counting calories or anything. I had gotten out of the habit of it, and quickly realized that eating the wrong things really spikes your weight, fills your face out, and makes your jeans fit a little tighter. Starting today I am going to get back into the counting of calories.
--Cut out all the ice tea and such (tho, 70calories per 8fl oz of ice tea isn't bad, it's just the mass amounts of sugar, in which case, I don't need it!!! I just need to talk my brain into that one)
--Get into a regular gym schedule
--Cut out the sugary stuff (cakes, cookies, donuts)
--Keep my fats under contral; stray away from grease and such
--EAT MORE VEGGIES...(try to keep in mind, brocolli will not kill me, lol)
--EAT MORE FRUITS!!
--Stop eating the things that make my stomach hurt (you'd think I'd learn..really)
Oh, something quite odd. As of last week, I can no longer drink milk, eat ice cream, or eat/drink anything that is primarly laced with lactose. I have never been lactose intollerant and it's never been a problem for me, cept for one time when I was younger, around 9 or 10, I couldn't drink milk or anything at all for about 6 or 7 months, then it just up and went away one day. Well, a week ago, it started all over again for me. Kinda weird.
So, we can rule out dairy products (it wont stop me, really, I'll do it anyways probably and just deal with it), grease, some meats.
Goals for the next few weeks:: Get into a good eating habit, start back up with the gym, get my medications squared around; oh, my biggest goal??
Show summer what I'm made of and transform myself!
I hope this time this sticks...hopefully. I'm crossing my fingers, toes, legs, and ears on this one!
Okay. I am now doin' try number three. I refuse to give up on this site, and I refuse to give up in general. I keep making promises to myself and I keep breaking them, but you need to jump back on the wagon each and everytime you fall off. Right? Right.
I've finally been put on medication to control my migraines, which has become a constant thing as of late, and this medication will be a twice a day medication for, well, as far as I knw, the rest of my life. It's to help prevent them, I've also been put on one to be taken when I get a migraine in order to just stop it and any others that may surpass the other medication. With that said, I am highly hoping that I can finally feel a certain level of normality for once instead of feeling like crap everyday and not wanting to do anything. The migraine pills also work, for very many people, as an appaitite (sp?) surpressent and cause many people to lose weight and to continue to lose weight throughout the duration of taking the medication, we're highly hoping it'll help a bit.
My wound is healing up; I can basically do whatever now, nothing hurts it really, it's becommin more and more shallow, and one of these months it should totally heal. I'm excited for that.
My weight, I have stayed between 283 and 285 for awhile now, and that's without counting calories or anything. I had gotten out of the habit of it, and quickly realized that eating the wrong things really spikes your weight, fills your face out, and makes your jeans fit a little tighter. Starting today I am going to get back into the counting of calories.
--Cut out all the ice tea and such (tho, 70calories per 8fl oz of ice tea isn't bad, it's just the mass amounts of sugar, in which case, I don't need it!!! I just need to talk my brain into that one)
--Get into a regular gym schedule
--Cut out the sugary stuff (cakes, cookies, donuts)
--Keep my fats under contral; stray away from grease and such
--EAT MORE VEGGIES...(try to keep in mind, brocolli will not kill me, lol)
--EAT MORE FRUITS!!
--Stop eating the things that make my stomach hurt (you'd think I'd learn..really)
Oh, something quite odd. As of last week, I can no longer drink milk, eat ice cream, or eat/drink anything that is primarly laced with lactose. I have never been lactose intollerant and it's never been a problem for me, cept for one time when I was younger, around 9 or 10, I couldn't drink milk or anything at all for about 6 or 7 months, then it just up and went away one day. Well, a week ago, it started all over again for me. Kinda weird.
So, we can rule out dairy products (it wont stop me, really, I'll do it anyways probably and just deal with it), grease, some meats.
Goals for the next few weeks:: Get into a good eating habit, start back up with the gym, get my medications squared around; oh, my biggest goal??
Show summer what I'm made of and transform myself!
I hope this time this sticks...hopefully. I'm crossing my fingers, toes, legs, and ears on this one!
Curvie Girlie
New member
Love you resolutions, and I know you can do this! Yes, dairy is no good for a lot of people. Stick on here and I wish the success!
UncoverBeauty
New member
I think my body is tryin' to hold onto this whole "let's stay fat" thing. lol.
Alright. From the start shall we?
First off. I landed myself in the hospital a month ago, for kidney stones. For the past month, I have gotten them off and on, and have lived on painkillers and mass amounts of water. This past weekend, I got another round of kidney stones. Toughed out the pain. (they weren't kiddin' when they said it's one of the worse pains you'll ever experince!! And this would mark time number 3). Drank myself silly with water, pain is finally gone (thus it being Monday).
Figured out, it's my Migraine medication causing the formation of the kidney stones, they warn that you should drink excess water, which I was, but it still didn't work.
As far as weight loss goes. Oy...oy oy oy!! I'm stumped, truly positively stumped. Right now I weigh 276.5lbs,(In Feb. When I started all this, I weighed 290lbs) and for the past month or more, I've only been able to eat once a day..if that. Not by my choice, but by my bodies choice. It seems to be, if I go to eat anything more then once a day I get sick or my body wont accept it.
Now, I have a very, odd eating pattern, as I've always had. And have had since I was little. And goes as such: eat very little/once a day for a few weeks then, like all great things, it comes to an end, I get horribly hungry, I pig out for a weekend, and then it starts all over again.
Strangly enough, that is what has always kept my weight under decent control, it was BEFORE that cycle, when I used to just eat and eat that I gained the weight, once I hit the barely eating cycle, did I lose or stay at a weight. Now I knw, if you hardly eat, you're going to lose weight, but they always say you're going to gain it back, if not more. Which I don't doubt.
But, like I said, rather lately, my body just has been rejecting food. (And I have not been pigging out, usually I hit that "pig out" point, but I haven't hit that or even felt that at all) I am under no circumstances trying to force myself to not eat. How in the heck do you get around that? It just seems so horribly normal for me.
I don't eat meat, more like, I can't eat meat. I can't eat a lot of certain foods, so at times I'm pretty limited in what I do eat, so my eating habits have gotten funky and the barely eating does come from really not wanting to eat much/having much to eat that agrees with my stomach, so has this become the natural way my body works? lol...
Cause even when I work out, yuss, you tend to eat a little more, but "eat a little more" to my body is "take a few more bites" and then "Please, dear lord, no more!! I'm STUFFED" and I've always been told "When you're full, STOP EATING. Never force yourself to eat anymore when you're body is telling you no."
So if my body is telling me "No", do I stop?? Cause reading about these 6 eatings a day, no matter how big or small, kinda makes me want to gag, I don't think I could ever possibly handle that...hell, I don't think I could handle 2. heh.
Alright. From the start shall we?
First off. I landed myself in the hospital a month ago, for kidney stones. For the past month, I have gotten them off and on, and have lived on painkillers and mass amounts of water. This past weekend, I got another round of kidney stones. Toughed out the pain. (they weren't kiddin' when they said it's one of the worse pains you'll ever experince!! And this would mark time number 3). Drank myself silly with water, pain is finally gone (thus it being Monday).
Figured out, it's my Migraine medication causing the formation of the kidney stones, they warn that you should drink excess water, which I was, but it still didn't work.
As far as weight loss goes. Oy...oy oy oy!! I'm stumped, truly positively stumped. Right now I weigh 276.5lbs,(In Feb. When I started all this, I weighed 290lbs) and for the past month or more, I've only been able to eat once a day..if that. Not by my choice, but by my bodies choice. It seems to be, if I go to eat anything more then once a day I get sick or my body wont accept it.
Now, I have a very, odd eating pattern, as I've always had. And have had since I was little. And goes as such: eat very little/once a day for a few weeks then, like all great things, it comes to an end, I get horribly hungry, I pig out for a weekend, and then it starts all over again.
Strangly enough, that is what has always kept my weight under decent control, it was BEFORE that cycle, when I used to just eat and eat that I gained the weight, once I hit the barely eating cycle, did I lose or stay at a weight. Now I knw, if you hardly eat, you're going to lose weight, but they always say you're going to gain it back, if not more. Which I don't doubt.
But, like I said, rather lately, my body just has been rejecting food. (And I have not been pigging out, usually I hit that "pig out" point, but I haven't hit that or even felt that at all) I am under no circumstances trying to force myself to not eat. How in the heck do you get around that? It just seems so horribly normal for me.
I don't eat meat, more like, I can't eat meat. I can't eat a lot of certain foods, so at times I'm pretty limited in what I do eat, so my eating habits have gotten funky and the barely eating does come from really not wanting to eat much/having much to eat that agrees with my stomach, so has this become the natural way my body works? lol...
Cause even when I work out, yuss, you tend to eat a little more, but "eat a little more" to my body is "take a few more bites" and then "Please, dear lord, no more!! I'm STUFFED" and I've always been told "When you're full, STOP EATING. Never force yourself to eat anymore when you're body is telling you no."
So if my body is telling me "No", do I stop?? Cause reading about these 6 eatings a day, no matter how big or small, kinda makes me want to gag, I don't think I could ever possibly handle that...hell, I don't think I could handle 2. heh.
UncoverBeauty
New member
I've come to the conclusion, though I've knwn for a few years now, that I have a horrible distorted view on myself (body image), also on food(and it's effects).
So a step at a time.
Since, Saturday? Yuss, Saturday..I believe. I have drank nothing but water! Woo! I was up at about well, 60/70fl ozs a day, if not more, and oy, that really cut down on being hungry, but I stopped drinking as much water. Bad me. I need to suck it up and choke it down! Get in the habit that WATER IS GOOD! *Sighs* Boy do I miss Ice Tea. Lol. But really, I'm fine with water
Gym was closed today, obviously, it bein' the 4th of July and all. I will go tomorrow! No biggie.
Speaking of the 4th, I've managed to not pig out on everything possible.
Had a small bowl of raspberry pie insides (no crust, wasn't any! Had very little sugar added, but had a crumb topping, all in all, it was rather good and less fattening then the actual pie). 4 small squares of home made pizza (and they truly are rather small squares). And I believe earlier I ate half a simple sandwhich. (Not supposed to eat meat, but, here and there I suck it up and deal with it. U get the craving for it! But you pay later with the stomach ache/headach!). Oh and water water water!! Can't forget the water!
I believe that's it. I really need to spend some time catching up, I read tons of peoples diaries, just am not around enough really. =/ But I still read! And I hope everyone is doin' good and has a Happy 4th!!
So a step at a time.
Since, Saturday? Yuss, Saturday..I believe. I have drank nothing but water! Woo! I was up at about well, 60/70fl ozs a day, if not more, and oy, that really cut down on being hungry, but I stopped drinking as much water. Bad me. I need to suck it up and choke it down! Get in the habit that WATER IS GOOD! *Sighs* Boy do I miss Ice Tea. Lol. But really, I'm fine with water
Gym was closed today, obviously, it bein' the 4th of July and all. I will go tomorrow! No biggie.
Speaking of the 4th, I've managed to not pig out on everything possible.
Had a small bowl of raspberry pie insides (no crust, wasn't any! Had very little sugar added, but had a crumb topping, all in all, it was rather good and less fattening then the actual pie). 4 small squares of home made pizza (and they truly are rather small squares). And I believe earlier I ate half a simple sandwhich. (Not supposed to eat meat, but, here and there I suck it up and deal with it. U get the craving for it! But you pay later with the stomach ache/headach!). Oh and water water water!! Can't forget the water! I believe that's it. I really need to spend some time catching up, I read tons of peoples diaries, just am not around enough really. =/ But I still read! And I hope everyone is doin' good and has a Happy 4th!!
UncoverBeauty
New member
I've been kinda, lacking in drinking water, but all I have been drinking is water. I'm down to 275.5lbs now. That is a number, that I have not seen since, uhm....ever?
It took me a bit to struggle and stay in the 280's, I'm sure it'll take a bit of struggling to stay in the 270's, but I will do it! And hopefully *Crosses fingers* I will get down to 270 and stay there for a bit, then I can continue on going down. (I like going down by 10s, and find it easier to stay at one weight for awhile and work with learning how to maintain that weight for a bit, then to keep losing weight once I worked that out.)
It's like, crash dieting (in a way, I guess, maybe not) then learning how to eat and exercise to stay at that weight. It also makes it fun for me, and every ounce of fun I can get, I will use! lol.
It took me a bit to struggle and stay in the 280's, I'm sure it'll take a bit of struggling to stay in the 270's, but I will do it! And hopefully *Crosses fingers* I will get down to 270 and stay there for a bit, then I can continue on going down. (I like going down by 10s, and find it easier to stay at one weight for awhile and work with learning how to maintain that weight for a bit, then to keep losing weight once I worked that out.)
It's like, crash dieting (in a way, I guess, maybe not) then learning how to eat and exercise to stay at that weight. It also makes it fun for me, and every ounce of fun I can get, I will use! lol.
nataliejo
New member
Hey Beauty!
I used to have the same problem with eating once a day ...but actually all I was doing was drinking protein shakes with fruit ...
and that made me not able to eat ... I so got used to not eating ...that I never ate.... three months later and sixty five pounds down ... I was in the hospital because I had reached a point where one of my abdomen organs was going to explode and I would bleed to death ... therefore I slowly forced myself to eat ..and work with the doctors .. I didn't want to die, because I wanted to be thin ...but I gained the weight back and twenty pounds more ... so twas not a good by me ...
I would suggest you make yourself eat more than just one meal a day ...
take a calcium pill if you are lactose intolerant ...your bones will appreciate it as you get older ...when you go past thirty you start losing bone mass ..but if you keep taking the calcium pill your bone density will increase ..the pill must have vitamin d in it ...because Vitamin D helps the calcium to be absorbed into your bones ... its good stuff ...
I broke my hand last year and it helped the medacarpals heal faster, however its a must I keep taking the calcium pill for my bones ... women are prone to losing bone mass, especially when losing weight ...
Your diary is very inspiring .. I look forward when I will be down to 275-270...pounds ...
Right now I am at 295 .. its very difficult to get below that ...
ITs too hot outside ..so I plan to do aerobics indoors and bench the weight inside my house ..in sept I am joining a fitness center ... "planet fitness"
U sound like you are doing awesome! Keep it up!
best wishes
always
natalie jo
I used to have the same problem with eating once a day ...but actually all I was doing was drinking protein shakes with fruit ...
and that made me not able to eat ... I so got used to not eating ...that I never ate.... three months later and sixty five pounds down ... I was in the hospital because I had reached a point where one of my abdomen organs was going to explode and I would bleed to death ... therefore I slowly forced myself to eat ..and work with the doctors .. I didn't want to die, because I wanted to be thin ...but I gained the weight back and twenty pounds more ... so twas not a good by me ...
I would suggest you make yourself eat more than just one meal a day ...
take a calcium pill if you are lactose intolerant ...your bones will appreciate it as you get older ...when you go past thirty you start losing bone mass ..but if you keep taking the calcium pill your bone density will increase ..the pill must have vitamin d in it ...because Vitamin D helps the calcium to be absorbed into your bones ... its good stuff ...
I broke my hand last year and it helped the medacarpals heal faster, however its a must I keep taking the calcium pill for my bones ... women are prone to losing bone mass, especially when losing weight ...
Your diary is very inspiring .. I look forward when I will be down to 275-270...pounds ...
Right now I am at 295 .. its very difficult to get below that ...
ITs too hot outside ..so I plan to do aerobics indoors and bench the weight inside my house ..in sept I am joining a fitness center ... "planet fitness"
U sound like you are doing awesome! Keep it up!
best wishes
always
natalie jo
UncoverBeauty
New member
Hey Natalie Jo!! Thanks so much for the response, your story of eating once a day..well needless to say, I've been tryin' to eat a little more then just once, and so far it's worked...sorta. I've been at least trying to eat a meal that includes some basic food groups and wont leave me lacking in anything. (but I'm sure I'm always lacking in something!)
I knw it took me the longest time to get below 295 too, then after my first surgery (to get rid of a cyst) I gained weight and hit 310lbs! It took me a year to get down to 290, just in time for my second surgery (to correct the first one) thankfully I didn't gain any weight then. You'll make it into the 270s in no time! Just keep working at it and never give up! =)
I knw it took me the longest time to get below 295 too, then after my first surgery (to get rid of a cyst) I gained weight and hit 310lbs! It took me a year to get down to 290, just in time for my second surgery (to correct the first one) thankfully I didn't gain any weight then. You'll make it into the 270s in no time! Just keep working at it and never give up! =)
UncoverBeauty
New member
*Dances* I'm finally at the 20lb mark!! Yay!! Now...to keep it off, and to lose more. I've been lacking in my exercise, blah, it's just too damned hott! (I knw, I knw, excuses!) Everyday I tell myself "Oh tomorrow.." and tomorrow comes and goes, thankfully I love swimming, and we have a pool, and swimming burns calories. So my friends come over, and we spend a good 3 to 4 hours in the pool everyday clowning around. *Grins* Least that counts as exercise, right?
But really, I need to step up this exercise thing. I shall, go for a walk later today. And my buddy is comin' over Friday, we're going to attempt to do one of our long 3 mile walks around the backroads, we haven't done one of those in a long time, I miss them!
------
I remember posting goals here, I'm not quite sure if I posted this one, BUT, my goal was to fit into my mothers wedding dress [size 12 or 14, I forget] by the time I go to get married. I uhm, was counting on having a few years, since weightloss takes time and I have a little ways to go before I hit 12 to 14. Unfortunally, I wont be that size to use her dress in time. It sort of saddens me, I wont lie, I looked forward to losing weight to someday have everyone see me in that dress. *grumbles*
I have a new goal now tho!!
New Goal:: To lose at least 30 to 40lbs by January 2008. That's roughly 8lbs a month, a total long shot (for me) but I need to step it up and get moving with this. IF I do it, that'll bring me down to, 245/235lbs, which I'm content with.
Why is this my new goal? And why January 2008, well, I'm moving, to Guam at the end of the year. Yuss, Guam [that small island under China]. I am also getting married in February. [hence the, not wearing my mothers weddin' dress thing]
Talk about a swift kick in the ass for motivation..heh! [That and, I'd like to at least FEEL healthy in comparisen to a man whose been in the Navy for the past 2 years! lol]
But really, I need to step up this exercise thing. I shall, go for a walk later today. And my buddy is comin' over Friday, we're going to attempt to do one of our long 3 mile walks around the backroads, we haven't done one of those in a long time, I miss them!
------
I remember posting goals here, I'm not quite sure if I posted this one, BUT, my goal was to fit into my mothers wedding dress [size 12 or 14, I forget] by the time I go to get married. I uhm, was counting on having a few years, since weightloss takes time and I have a little ways to go before I hit 12 to 14. Unfortunally, I wont be that size to use her dress in time. It sort of saddens me, I wont lie, I looked forward to losing weight to someday have everyone see me in that dress. *grumbles*
I have a new goal now tho!!
New Goal:: To lose at least 30 to 40lbs by January 2008. That's roughly 8lbs a month, a total long shot (for me) but I need to step it up and get moving with this. IF I do it, that'll bring me down to, 245/235lbs, which I'm content with.
Why is this my new goal? And why January 2008, well, I'm moving, to Guam at the end of the year. Yuss, Guam [that small island under China]. I am also getting married in February. [hence the, not wearing my mothers weddin' dress thing]
Talk about a swift kick in the ass for motivation..heh! [That and, I'd like to at least FEEL healthy in comparisen to a man whose been in the Navy for the past 2 years! lol]
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UncoverBeauty
New member
Yay! I've got my friend exercising with me now. We're going to be running 2X a week starting the 11th. (she only moves back home the 8th). We've made some mini goals as to distance with running. She's also really keen on teaching me to dance. One of the perks of having an active bestfriend!
I rearranged my goals. I'm now moving in February. I'm shooting still, to lose 8 to 10lbs a month. (1-2lbs a week).
I'm going to start taking walks up and down my street (this includes HUGE hills).
All in all, I'd like to lose a fair amount of weight, enough to make me feel good/look slimmer. =)
I rearranged my goals. I'm now moving in February. I'm shooting still, to lose 8 to 10lbs a month. (1-2lbs a week).
I'm going to start taking walks up and down my street (this includes HUGE hills).
All in all, I'd like to lose a fair amount of weight, enough to make me feel good/look slimmer. =)
Curvie Girlie
New member
All right!! you posted on my birthday!! It was a perfect b-day present--to hear that you're running regularly with a girlfriend Best wishes to you in your endeavor, losing the pounds quickly!
It was a perfect b-day present--to hear that you're running regularly with a girlfriend Best wishes to you in your endeavor, losing the pounds quickly!UncoverBeauty
New member
AWW!!! Curvie Girl happy birthday!!!!
Curvie Girlie
New member
Thank you, hey--if you have time, come check out the Runner's Club thread, we like to kick it there! I actually haven't ran as much lately, but it;s great motivation!
UncoverBeauty
New member
Back To The Old Stomping Grounds
Ah, back to the start. I've got to be one of the most unmotivated people I've ever had the displeasure of running into. With that said, I haven't really been around here in two months. Seems longer actually. But I've been reading here and there, checking out the before's and after's, I'm quite proud of everybody!
As for me? I've been following sparkpeople.com, which, hasn't been going to wonderful. I lack self discipline when it comes to losing weight. I'd like to say I've given up, but that's not possible at this point. I just have to work harder, a concept that I struggle with greatly. Like most people, I want a quick fix, something tha'tll help now and when I wake up tomorrow, I'll have my goal. The hardest part has been learning that life doesn't work like that.
By this point, I'm not making any self proclaimed goals. It seems to be that when I make goals, I fail. When I get excited, I fail. I've had to learn to take weightloss as any other day, don't get excited, and just keep going. Which in itself is hard, 5 pounds down and I want to shout it from the rooftops, but if I do, I'll gain all 5 plus 1 extra back. Over thinking never helps and can be the cruelest downfall of losing weight, for me at least.
I'm going to be 18 in December, I had hoped I'd at least have something to show for it. I've already lost 20lbs, but that's been for what, as long as I've been on here. It's a let down, but the most I can say is, I haven't gained it back. That's always a bonus.
I've been getting out to run more. Sort of, forcing myself out doors. It's the point leading up to it that I dread most but once I'm out there, I don't want to come back in. It's amazing how lazy the human mind can be, even just about standing up and going outdoors, but once you're out it's as tho the brain has kicked on and jump started.
I'm also going to look into Cayenne pepper pills. I'm not doing it for the supposed weightloss they offer, but because they've been proven to help solve different stomach problems. If it boots my metablisom in the process, then score one for me, but I'm curious to see if it'll fix other problems as well.
And I'm sure taking a Cayenne pepper PILL is easier than taking a spoon full of Cayenne pepper. trust me, I've been eyeing up the container of the powder on the counter recently
Aside from all that. I'm alive, which is good, it helps in the whole walking, talking, breathing scheme of things. I'm still doing course work [I lack motivation in that too]. I'm still at home, but I'm moving out in early 2008 sometime. And I'm still unGodly stuck on this weightloss thing.
My lack of motivation is because I think I can't do it, that I wont be one of those with a before/after, when in truth, I have no idea what I'm even doing anymore!
Ah, back to the start. I've got to be one of the most unmotivated people I've ever had the displeasure of running into. With that said, I haven't really been around here in two months. Seems longer actually. But I've been reading here and there, checking out the before's and after's, I'm quite proud of everybody!
As for me? I've been following sparkpeople.com, which, hasn't been going to wonderful. I lack self discipline when it comes to losing weight. I'd like to say I've given up, but that's not possible at this point. I just have to work harder, a concept that I struggle with greatly. Like most people, I want a quick fix, something tha'tll help now and when I wake up tomorrow, I'll have my goal. The hardest part has been learning that life doesn't work like that.
By this point, I'm not making any self proclaimed goals. It seems to be that when I make goals, I fail. When I get excited, I fail. I've had to learn to take weightloss as any other day, don't get excited, and just keep going. Which in itself is hard, 5 pounds down and I want to shout it from the rooftops, but if I do, I'll gain all 5 plus 1 extra back. Over thinking never helps and can be the cruelest downfall of losing weight, for me at least.
I'm going to be 18 in December, I had hoped I'd at least have something to show for it. I've already lost 20lbs, but that's been for what, as long as I've been on here. It's a let down, but the most I can say is, I haven't gained it back. That's always a bonus.
I've been getting out to run more. Sort of, forcing myself out doors. It's the point leading up to it that I dread most but once I'm out there, I don't want to come back in. It's amazing how lazy the human mind can be, even just about standing up and going outdoors, but once you're out it's as tho the brain has kicked on and jump started.
I'm also going to look into Cayenne pepper pills. I'm not doing it for the supposed weightloss they offer, but because they've been proven to help solve different stomach problems. If it boots my metablisom in the process, then score one for me, but I'm curious to see if it'll fix other problems as well.
And I'm sure taking a Cayenne pepper PILL is easier than taking a spoon full of Cayenne pepper. trust me, I've been eyeing up the container of the powder on the counter recently
Aside from all that. I'm alive, which is good, it helps in the whole walking, talking, breathing scheme of things. I'm still doing course work [I lack motivation in that too]. I'm still at home, but I'm moving out in early 2008 sometime. And I'm still unGodly stuck on this weightloss thing.
My lack of motivation is because I think I can't do it, that I wont be one of those with a before/after, when in truth, I have no idea what I'm even doing anymore!
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