Time's a Wastin, and I'm Still Fat.

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Thanks guys. I definitely am not depriving myself, especially these last couple months! Been eating far too much of all the things!

Chinese food shot my weight up to 154.4 this morning! Ick! I'm guessing my actual weight is around 144-145 or so.

Busy Busy day today!! Was on the go from 7:45am till 9:30pm.
Worked an almost full day (would have been TOO full but I had a cancellation). I did have some of the left over food I bought that I hadn't intended to eat but not too much. After I had to rush off as I was helping at a Sport Horse Auction. I had to lead a few horses around the ring as the people bid on them. I was also modelling some clothes from a retailer that was there. At the end of the night they also auctioned off a some of the clothes we were wearing. It was fun. I had had a granola bar on my way, then stopped off and got some taquito things as I had no idea when I would be able to eat as I was supposed to be at the auction at 4pm and if didn't actually start till 7pm so knew I would be there for a while and home quite late.
When I got there though they actually gave me a coupon for free poutine at the vender that was there I did get a small poutine and a can of coke but I only ate/drank half of each at most.
I had quite a headache the whole evening. Possibly because I forgot my water bottle in the morning so didn't drink anything for virtually the whole day.
Had a couple protein bars when I got home, and though I had to estimate cals on my chinese food, and poutine I believe I finished well under my calories and got in over 10,000 steps.

Cals Eaten: 1815
 
I think the most busy days is really difficult to stay on track. I have started the week with the intention to stay on track, anyway. It's ok for the moment but i realize that i have a really busy day today and i won't get back home before 8 pm. I would like not take anything fast food and wait returning home. I have some bars and fruits with me for the meantime. I plan not indulging but now i feel empty without the feeling of fullness and that makes me irritated and not stop thinking about food. However, i'll make some more patience, i am determined to make this plan with daily calories deficit to see how it 'll go for this week.
 
Sometimes it´s just freaking hard and you have to ride the waves trying not to gain until things calm down again. How does it feel to be modeling clothes???
 
I think we've all been there on the motivation front.

Doing any hiking or jogging lately? Sometimes forcing yourself to go out for one good exercise session can have an amazing effect.
 
Thanks guys. Busy days are better for me in general than days where I don't do much as long as they don't make me really really tired or if I get home pretty early in the evening and feel a bit tired.

I haven't jogged much or hiked lately. I have done weights a few times. I don't know if running would get me on track though as the last couple months I had been running like crazy and eating too much!

152.8 this morning.

Had a bad night of trying to sleep last night which left me quite tired today.
Ate ALLLLLLLLLL the food today! ALL the food!
Too many granola bars at work. Then left work and instead of going riding then to the gym I stopped and picked up ice cream and a chocolate bar. Ate the chocolate bar on the way home. Had 2 massive bowls of ice cream when I got home, went and got pizza and garlic bread for supper. Shovelled the entire rest of the container of ice cream into my face, then had a few little candies to finish the night. Guessing at about 5000 cals! OMG this HAS to stop.
Tomorrow no matter what I have to ride and exercise!!!! And eat under 2000 cals!!
 
Aww Mystic, don't really know what to say... I know exactly how you feel with the out of control eating and know that nothing any of us say will help. Just keep logging, keep trying... and try not to feel guilty or beat yourself up as that can just make the cycle repeat itself.
 
I was in the same mood the previous night before i go to sleep. The most difficult time to control myself. I just stopped the last moment before indulging completely sweets, chocolate etc. Yesterday the day was fine until i had an intense disagreement with a woman about some reason. Not something important but my mood changed and i was thinking about it all the rest day until i went to sleep. So that made me anxious and i was so much near to indulge food. Anyway today i feel better, i have a very busy day and i will go home late. I 'll try to avoid fast food. I have fruits and bars with me until i go home for dinner.
 
Thanks guys. It's such a frustrating journey this weight loss thing!

154 this morning.

Coming down with a cold today. Woke up with a stuffy, snotty nose, then in the afternoon it turned to sore throat and feeling tired and rundown. I went for lunch with my mom and her friend to Vietnamese, then after work instead of doing stuff like riding and working out I went home, using my sickness as an excuse. Though I feel sick, I surely could have gone and ridden and at least done my weights.
I ate too much again. Less than yesterday but certainly far too much. got dairy queen on my way home, again under the excuse of being sick and wanting to soothe my sore throat.
I ate some of the goodies I got from volunteering to 'model' the other day, and had the 4 remaining slices of pizza, had 2 granola bars and one protein bar, and some white chocolate peanut butter.

Cals Eaten: 3775

I had to get additional documents for the people that conditionally bought my condo (they are getting all documents reviewed by a professional company), then they are doing a home inspection tomorrow (why they are doing a home inspection I don't know, it's a condo for pete's sake). Still seems SO long until we close! Not till the 22nd! Nearly a week yet!! Nearly a week that they can still back out!
Really need to get my horse sold now if I want to keep my payments low! If I can get him sold I can put his purchase price against my downpayment which means I should virtually not have to take out any loans (my mom is willing to loan me some money so I don't have to pay interest) so will remove those payments so I would just have the actual mortgage payment which I think would be workable for me especially with no horse payments and with doing some dog sitting of clients and such. Then it would be more of my choice to have a roommate or not rather than more of a necessity.
 
Stress can really throw a monkey wrench into our goals. I think it's because it hurts our focus and it does take a certain amount of focus to make progress.

That said, you've made a ton of progress and a few days of stress related backsliding won't undo it. I had done the same sort of thing from time to time. The one bonus is that these little hiccups probably help from keeping our metabolism from crashing, so once you get back on track you'll probably lose weight quicker. So you never do as much damage as you think.

Chin up and keep working at it.
 
The feeling of tiredness is another thing that sometimes makes me indulging in food. As yesterday was a very busy day and i returned home late i felt tired and without energy. I couldn't go to sleep without eating so i ate dinner very late. I tried somehow to limit my food calories intake. Today, in the morning i felt that i should have slept more. It was early and i didn't have a lot of energy. However i didn't eat and only I drank water and coffee with milk. This morning i didn't see a lot of difference in scales, it was nearly the same with the day before although yesterday i had limited my calories(although I ate dinner late) and it was a busy day. I didn't have intense moments with any kind of disagreements something that made my mood fine. However today i feel very tired and that i haven't slept enough, i can't relax with food, i have a busy day and i will return home late again. At least I should try avoid any kind of intense disagreement although i have serious meetings because I think I wouldn’t have energy to cope with. I ‘ll stay on my diet plan for another day to see if this will work somehow. I don't want to backslide because i feel tired to start again. However backsliding is always a possibility.
 
Thanks guys. Ugh. I'm sick. Throat is on fire and scratchy, nose is stuffy and runny, feeling real gross.

Ate too much again today. Don't even know if I can calculate it from 2 restaurant meals, dairy queen, chocolate, popcorn, etc.
The home inspection happened today. Crossing fingers that it went ok. I think everything is fine except (Besides a hole in the ceiling in the tiny laundry space from some work that happened right when I bought this place and I didn't complain soon enough that they fixed it) that the toilet runs for a bit after flushing. I can tell he fiddled around with the toilet but it still ran when I got home so he couldn't 'fix' it with his fiddlings. The other thing that worries me about that is that we made a large banjo arm over the toilet and it makes it very hard to access the back of the toilet so he could make that out to be a thing. Crossing fingers.
 
Hey thanks. Still feeling crappy. Still eating crappy.

Forgot to weigh myself this morning. Literally forgot to weight, not because I didn't want to weigh.
Spent most of the day at home. Last night I put up ads for my horse all over facebook, got tons of 'likes' on them and a few inquiries (but no solid 'I'm going to come see him on this date'). He has had a few days off with me being sick but since I now have his ad up I knew I had to go out and ride him today no matter what so if people wanted to come see him he wouldn't be crazy energetic from not being ridden. So at about 2 I changed and headed out to ride. My horse was fantastic. So good that it makes the thought of selling him even harder! Dumb pony!
Went to my mom's house for part of the evening to do a little planning for out New York trip.
Sorry I haven't gone around to other people's diaries. This lack of motivation leaves me not motivated to go around to diaries. I'm hoping to be back at it monday. If I can be really good all of next week I should lose most of this water weight before out trip. My stomach is HUGE from being to bloated with all the bad food I've been eating!
 
I feel your pain girl, and all these life changes certainly don´t make it any easier. On the other hand: a bloated stomach doesn´t help either so let´s promise each other to do well today.
 
Oh, Mystic. Life is very hard for you at the moment. It will change soon sweetie. Do the best you can for the moment. You'll get your motivation back soon, xoC
 
Thanks guys.

155 this morning.

So my goal for the next week (before leaving for new york) is to really be on top of my eating so that I can really get my water weight down to reduce the bloating in my belly so I will feel ok in the clothes I will be wearing for the trip. Gonna try to eat 1500-1700 a day and lower sodium if I can.
I will also try to do 3 days of 5km runs, and 3 days of weight training. Still getting over being sick so the running might wait till closer to the end of the week but I should be able to do weights tomorrow.
Closing on my house is Tuesday, crossing fingers it all goes well. They are making me fix the toilet, however what really annoys me is that it's SUCH an easy fix I know I could do it myself (I figured out it was the flow valve that I think is totally gunked up and gross which is causing low pressure which is causing it to take a long time to fill. It isn't actually 'running') but the nut holding the flow valve in place is SO tight I can't get it to turn (no matter which way I try to turn it). Some people say to just strip it all the way down, but I worry that it would take so long to strip it down that I would get halfway and not be able to do any more then the plumber might have a hard time getting it off so it would cost even more. My mom has offered to pay for the plumber since I was trying so hard to do it myself and it wasn't working out and I'm getting so little out of my house that spending 150 bucks on a plumber is tough to swallow.
Plumber is coming tuesday after work.
Was happy I rode my horse 2 days in a row. He was good for our jump school today. I hope to ride him tomorrow, tuesday will depend on what I have to do for closing and the plumber. Wednesday my friend is gonna come with me to ride my horse. I need someone to ride him while I'm away since I have that show coming up in October (likely my very last show with Elis, if he doesn't sell beforehand).
My mom starts her new job tomorrow which means I can no longer leave work as soon as I'm done grooming, I have to stay until all dogs are picked up, or until 4. Which, you know, is mostly just a normal hour workday but still, on slow days it does suck to be stuck at work haha.
 
154 this morning.

Still sick. Lightish day of work today. Should have gone and ridden but I felt quite tired from working while being sick. So also didn't go to the gym. I think I ate a bit less cals, but still too much. Tomorrow I will try to be better!
 
Hope you get better soon Mystic. Just do the best you can & don't stress over it xo


xo Cate (via Tapatalk)
 
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