Time to find healthy..

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BlueBean

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I am really no good at introductions, so here goes nothing!

After seeing the highest number I've ever weighed last year, I vowed to make a change. I lost 10kgs, and kept it off for a good year, but then illness kicked in and I found myself back at my old habits, and put 5kg back on.

I decided a few weeks ago I was going to make one last crack at getting healthy, weighing less, and being happy with my body. One more time to prove to myself I CAN do this. I WILL do this.

I started at 115kg last week. Today I sit at 113.3kg. My heaviest was 120kg.
For those who don't use kg, I weighed 253lbs last week, and now weigh 249lbs as of this morning.
I am not proud of where I am. I am not proud of my body, how I feel, or how I look. Only I can make the change - so that's what I am going to do!

Google (in all its wisdom) suggests for my age/height I should weigh 70 kg. I am going to aim to find a comfortable, healthy weight between 70-80kg. Feeling happy in my own skin, to me, is more important than the number on the scale.

Here we go..!
 
Last week I was invited into a facebook group that discussed weight loss surgery. This is something that I am not interested in for myself, but keen to hear other peoples results and experiences. One person had suggested hypnosis as an alternative, which got me googling ..
I am a pretty open minded person. I try to see the good in everything, no matter how odd it may sound. And my research lead me to hypnotic lap band surgery. Again, not something I was interested in for me, but kept googling.

I downloaded an app (there is an app for everything!) that had a hypnotic tape on there for weight loss. Only one of the tracks was free, so I thought why not!
I ended up falling asleep half way through, but woke up when he said to. I felt great after my mini-nap, but didn't think anything of it. This was on Friday.
Since then, without realizing it, I've been passing up on bad foods and seeking out better foods. For the first time in a long time, I bought fruit AND ate it.
All of it.

To draw you a picture of how I got to be this squishy - I am a snacker. I don't actually enjoy my foods - I eat to stay alive. When I do eat, I eat a lot, and I eat fast, but love chocolate. I could quite easily go through a packet of what ever was closest while studying. My portions are huge. My choices, well, not great.
Since Friday, I have found myself not craving chocolate, but instead reaching for strawberries. When I have my few squares at night I don't actually enjoy them as much as I used to, I feel guilty that I am using precious calories on food that is processed and, well, crap.
I don't want to drink juices, I want water (I do love water).
I have sat here all day studying (it's 1pm), I had breakfast (I never, ever, ever eat breakfast), cup of tea, and lunch.
No sweets.
The 'old' me could have gone through half a chocolate block, or worse, before lunch.

I don't believe one free app has 'cured me of my sins', but it may have helped. I listened to it again (and stayed awake) - it wasn't that amazing. But yet, it was? It was all the stuff that makes sense (don't eat processed foods, don't eat sugar, eat wholesome foods, fruit, veggies, make your meals, don't drink your calories, etc), but you are so relaxed that it must have sunk in. I've lost 1.7kg since Friday from making better choices - and for the first time in all my attempts to be healthy, I do not feel like I am 'missing out'.
I do believe proper hypnosis sessions would probably be more beneficial, and I don't think this will work for everyone. Deep down I feel it's my drive that has stopped me reaching for the sweets.. not a 40 min free app. But, if it was the app, then I am not complaining!

---

My little blab. It might help someone, it might not. I don't want to start a fight on whether or not hypnosis works. I believe every therapy has benefits and side effects (I am a massage therapist with many different techniques from different therapies). This app may have helped me on my journey, and I'm happy!
 
:hurray: This morning the scales were kind. I am down 2.7kg!! Woohoo!! I am sure most of it is just waterweight, but it's still very encouraging to see the numbers dropping. Awesome!!!

I rode my horse last night - something I've put off for a very long time due to my weight. I still feel much too heavy for her, but it was a nice little taste of what I'm working towards.
My back is killing me this morning.

My first PT assessment/session tomorrow... eek!!
 
Thank you for the warm welcome and encouraging words!

I am finding myself more hungry last night and today. Even after eating, I find myself thinking about my next meal, even planning food - this is a good improvement.
Tonight my o/h said he wanted to get take out. I hesitated, and googled for the best options in my area. I almost went with a burger, but felt guilty at the thought of 'wasting' my calories. I opted for sushi - yum!
Feeling sore after yesterdays ride. I am feeling brighter and less tired in the afternoons.. being extremely low iron it's quite a novelty to not want to nap by 2pm.
 
Hi :) i'm a personal trainer in San Francisco, I've helped many people get into the best shape possible! I want to share some information with you! I want to give a few tips on dropping weight. Step 1) Believe you can achieve anything and loosing weight is just one task, as long as you believe in yourself and you understand you can accomplish anything, you can do this....let no one stop you. Surround your self with positive people and find someone to hold you accountable. Step 2) Find out what works well for you, what healthy foods do you enjoy eating, start incorporating that into your diet, if it's to much to eat healthy 24/7 then give your self certain hours of the day to eat healthy, example (I will eat lots of veggies with every meal from 10am-5pm) Step 3)Find a system that works for you, get on a schedule, stick with a routine for a period of time, commit your self 3 weeks of a trial period of any system and see if it's a good fit. If you crave chocolate, you can be craving magnesium which can be found in NUTS, SEEDS, VEGGIES, Fruit ... If your craving breads then Dark leafy greens any..p with your cravings. apply it today and be great!
 
Thank you for the tips JT :) I will certainly keep them in mind.

My session with the PT yesterday was really good! She was extremely thorough, talked to us (I went with a friend) about our current weight/foods/etc, our goals, and took measurements. She really listened, and cared about what we said. She didn't encourage me on any shakes, pills, or anything like that. She is studying nutrition and is keen to eat healthy, wholesome foods that are good for our bodies (and tailored to our individual needs). She did fitness tests, and was very kind through the whole process.

She is writing up a fitness program that I can do from home - a couple of days at my friends place where I will have use of her at-home gym set up, and a few days at home. I have access to mums cross trainer, a couple of dumbbells at home, and lots of walking trails. I'm excited to see what she comes up with!

I caved yesterday .. I was going so strong! I had fruit and yogurt for breaky, sushi for lunch, but after 4 hours of driving, and then to help my o/h with his work, we had Red Rooster. Oh the shame! I didn't want to, but was so hungry by that point I was stupid and caved. I attempted to eat something healthier (roast chicken roll with lots of salad), but the chips and half a coke didn't help. This morning my scales show me 700g+. Poop!!! That's enough to put me off - one meal (that actually wasn't that tasty - all I could taste was oil!) isn't worth going backwards.

So as I type this, I am sipping on my fresh smoothie of frozen mango, frozen banana, almond milk and cinnamon, trying to re-cleanse my system. The coke gave me a sugar headache, the chips made me feel bloated, and the sub wasn't actually that nice (the sauce was awful, and I don't like bacon - I know, shoot me now!).

Today I WILL be back on track. I want to take the dog for a walk after my smoothie. I have some serious muscle pain going on in my legs from my ride a few days ago (I think I've torn a muscle from trying to mount up from the ground - as much as I hate mounting up from the ground my horse was being silly near the mounting block). I also think I'm having pain from yesterdays mini-workout .. Pushups?? Plank?? Squats?? Weights?? that's dusting off some serious cobwebs!! But I feel good for feeling the burn - the workout was so light I honestly didn't think I'd feel anything (about 12 of each exercise to see how much weight/time I could handle).

Happy days!!
 
Hi BlueBean! Don't beat yourself up about the meal. It's a learning experience. Just don't forget how you felt afterwards... Some foods are worth a little indulgence, but definitely not all of them. Best of luck with the new exercise program!!
 
Thanks Oaks!
Most certainly will be remember how I felt during/after the meal. As you said, it's all learning, and I've learnt I would rather have a 'treat' as something healthy and feel positive about my choices. Very interesting in how quickly you lose the taste for food that you once loved.

Feeling better about today! :)
 
Thank you Oaks!
I'll admit, my weekend wasn't amazing, but I was conscious of making better choices. I did have take out, but I opted for a wrap over a burger. Still not amazing, but a better option. I have put on 500g, which I haven't been able to shift since Saturday. I am not too stressed about it.

I had my second PT session yesterday afternoon .. and I was a little disappointed. The trainer has two young kids, and I get it's hard to find someone to sit them, but it's quite distracting having a toddler grabbing at you when you're holding weights, and the other one running around throwing rocks near your car. Made me less focused on what I was doing and more concerned for the kids. The session was at my mates house, and she showed us how to use her all-in-one gym kit thing (with the pullies, and lifts and leg stuff), which is why we wanted her out. We then talked through our programs (food suggestions, not meal plans as I first thought), and she ran us through the exercises to make sure we were doing them correctly.

My friend was disappointed to find out her exercise program didn't use her machine that she had just showed us how to use. Our programs are very similar, just at different rates (She has more as I am much bigger than my friend). For me, this is great - the exercises are gentle enough to get me moving, but hard enough to get the heart rate up. It also means I don't need any fancy machines! Just a couple of weights, a step and my own body weight. I feel my friend was not happy with the service.

I am going to give this a go regardless - as well as lots of walking. My poor dog wont know what has hit her!
The food suggestions were okay - she wants me to eat around 2000 calories, which is going to be hard for me. I have been going off 1200, and thought I could bump it up to 1500, but I find eating quite annoying. I do not have a good relationship with food (it's improving slowly), but I find it hard to eat lots of food in small portions. I'd rather 2 big meals a day to get it over and done with .. not good, I know. I am getting much better with 3 solid meals and snacks. She says to eat when hungry, and stop when you're satisfied (but not bursting full). Doesn't matter what time it is, just eat when you're hungry (obviously no binge eating at midnight). This works for me!

I have also signed up with the Christmas Challenge she is running - it's $10 (Which I've paid), and you win PT session, massage, and some prize money. I have signed up for 8kg.. I thought this was a manageable goal (1kg per week), as suggested by my Pt. But my friend almost had a melt down! She thought that would be near impossible for me to do.. I don't feel confident after the 500gram weightgain, and not being able to shift it. But the 'real' workouts started yesterday, so I really hope I see results. I don't care about winning, I only paid the money for the commitment.

Will see how we go .. who knows! O/h has agreed to come on an hour walk with me tonight. We'll sleep well after walking the huge hill down the road!
 
Thanks Sunflower :) I have two horses, both fat and happy in the paddock. I would like to aim to ride once a week as is, or at least once a fortnight. One is semi-retired (she does better in light work, but has some how scratched down her spine and over her hind end quite badly, so is on paddock rest), and the other one is I guess semi-retired as well. I'd like to pull my riding horse back out and do some competitions next year... that'd mean wearing cream pants! Eek! Need my butt to shrink before attempting that!!
It's getting hot in Australia, and I am not a heat-lover at all. Thanks to my wonderful hormones, I feel the heat in the low 20's, and suffer heat stroke for anything over 25 degrees C, so riding and work gets altered during summer.

Last night we had noodles - I had cashew chicken (a personal favorite), which I regretted afterwards. I am hoping to find a healthier alternative to the take away version, as my poor stomach was not happy digesting such noodles! I kept my portions smaller, and only had this as they had stopped making Sushi. Poo!
I did an extra workout this afternoon after work - my legs are burrrrrrrning now. I'm strangely enjoying the leg-burning pain I've been in since Monday. My lunges suffered greatly in today's session due to the pain, but I did 3 x 10 reps instead of my 3 x 12 reps. They weren't 'deep' lunges, but I still felt the muscles working, so I'm pleased. I will take the dog for a walk tonight as well.

Made the mistake of telling my PT we have a killer hill around the corner, and she has now said that I need to walk that hill as part of my routine 3-4 times a week. Joy! My goal is to be able to run that stupid hill. Sorry dog, but you're coming with me!
 
I just love you can bet/win Money on weightloss, we do not have that here - and a PT too, sounds so lovely. You will win either way, Money or lower weight :D
 
Thanks Clarissa! I am not feeling confident about winning any money though .. I am yet to lose any weight since my starting weight (which actually went up 500g a couple of days before signing up). So I actually have 9kgs to lose..
I went for my first (since I started my health kick) morning walk. Have a nice steep hill out the back, which we did (we being myself and the dog). We also did some baby interval training using the lamp post on a flat road - 4 slow, shorter jogs in total, but that's better than no jogs! Nice cool down with a slight incline and flat down our street. Poor dog, who is about as unfit as I am, is knackered. She loved the walk/jog, but she is fast asleep on her bed.. we only walked in the door 3 mins ago.

O/H is still in bed, but said he'll come with me on a walk tonight where we will battle, what I call, The Hill. The Hill is a street near us, it's an hours walk around that block due to the size of The Hill. Walking up is a nightmare, jogging is torture, and running is impossible (for me). My goal is to jog up that hill one day.. one day. Even if I choose the less steep hill route, it's twice as long going around the other way. So either way, there is a hill, and it'll get the heart rate right up.

Is walking up hills twice a day too much? Today will mostly be spent studying, or house work. Or mucking out the paddocks (lucky me!).

Time for breakfast - frozen mango, banana, cinnamon and almond milk smoothy! Yummmmmm!
 
Boom!
Two walks done. Completed. Kicked the hills butt!
Two walks, total of 1hr 45 mins in total. 2 MASSIVE hills, a little flat, 1 big down hill, and some jogging. I feel good. I feel amazing. I feel healthier! The dog is still recovering, but she enjoyed it. Even my partner decided to join me, and push me this afternoon to do a longer walk. He even RAN up one of the hills - good for him! I am not at the point where I want to push myself that much (I'd like to reduce injury), but I'm proud of him for running. I power walked ahead, then he and the (exhausted) dog jogged up behind.

I will give the dog a massage tomorrow, I have a few tools of the trade I can use on us both to help with muscle recovery (I am a massage therapist for horses, and she loves the tools I use).

Another 45 min walk to start the day tomorrow? I think yes!
 
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