BiancaV88
New member
So, this is my third diary...I was thinking of making a blog but if I just type in a blog, I might not get any feedback and frankly, I would love some feedback.
I have tried twice already to get myself into shape. The first time,I lost only 30ish. Second time I tried to get unstuck but to no avail. I am still stuck in the same weight, for almost a FREAKING YEAR. So this is my third time....and lets just hope its a charm!
I decided maybe my reasons for wanting to lose weight weren't on the right track. I want to feel attractive, especially to my boyfriend. I know he already loves me but I want to feel sexier.
So I thought that wasn't right but the real reason is cause I want to be healthy and feel confident. I want to take charge in my life. if I cannot take charge of my weight or control it then I can't control anything else. I don't want to be judged based on my weight. I don't want to miss jobs because they think I cannot handle the work.
I want to be able to do things. A girl that started the same time with me at the gym has lost 90lbs in a year. IN A YEAR. She just ran the Bank of America Marathon. ANd here I am, 261lbs and I cannot for the life of me break that number. I will be happy to just be 257 as long as I am out of that 260 range.
So, I thought it was my diet. Maybe its not good enough. Cause the girl said she eats 1600cals a day but she works at the gym for about 3 hours a day. I cannot do that and eat so little. =( I am not sure what to do. So the gym manager weighed me and measured me. Since Sept20th, I have lost 11 and a half inches off my body. The weight is still the same. She told me to not weigh myself for 3months but every month for her to measure me. She doesn't want me to give up because she knows I work so hard. I literally was going to give up this time again but I don't want to. I want to make people proud and show them that I can finish something. I want to show my family that I am not some fat girl. I have dreams and aspirations. I want to show my boyfriend that I take pride and confidence in myself.
The manager also said on top of my workouts I should not eat 1600. I should eat 2000 a day. Because to maintain my weight, I would have to eat 2086 cals a day. With the exercise i do, I would need to eat 3056 calories to maintain my weight. So, if I eat 2000 cals a day of the right foods, I should be able to lose 1000 calories a day in exercise. Or should I eat 1800 a day?
Thanks for reading my novel for the third time. I am hoping I will get out of this rut.
-Bianca
I have tried twice already to get myself into shape. The first time,I lost only 30ish. Second time I tried to get unstuck but to no avail. I am still stuck in the same weight, for almost a FREAKING YEAR. So this is my third time....and lets just hope its a charm!
I decided maybe my reasons for wanting to lose weight weren't on the right track. I want to feel attractive, especially to my boyfriend. I know he already loves me but I want to feel sexier.
So I thought that wasn't right but the real reason is cause I want to be healthy and feel confident. I want to take charge in my life. if I cannot take charge of my weight or control it then I can't control anything else. I don't want to be judged based on my weight. I don't want to miss jobs because they think I cannot handle the work.
I want to be able to do things. A girl that started the same time with me at the gym has lost 90lbs in a year. IN A YEAR. She just ran the Bank of America Marathon. ANd here I am, 261lbs and I cannot for the life of me break that number. I will be happy to just be 257 as long as I am out of that 260 range.
So, I thought it was my diet. Maybe its not good enough. Cause the girl said she eats 1600cals a day but she works at the gym for about 3 hours a day. I cannot do that and eat so little. =( I am not sure what to do. So the gym manager weighed me and measured me. Since Sept20th, I have lost 11 and a half inches off my body. The weight is still the same. She told me to not weigh myself for 3months but every month for her to measure me. She doesn't want me to give up because she knows I work so hard. I literally was going to give up this time again but I don't want to. I want to make people proud and show them that I can finish something. I want to show my family that I am not some fat girl. I have dreams and aspirations. I want to show my boyfriend that I take pride and confidence in myself.
The manager also said on top of my workouts I should not eat 1600. I should eat 2000 a day. Because to maintain my weight, I would have to eat 2086 cals a day. With the exercise i do, I would need to eat 3056 calories to maintain my weight. So, if I eat 2000 cals a day of the right foods, I should be able to lose 1000 calories a day in exercise. Or should I eat 1800 a day?
Thanks for reading my novel for the third time. I am hoping I will get out of this rut.
-Bianca
