I am loving this day off thing.....
Seriously.
I would have never considered it before, being a slap in the face to my "diets" of the past. But now it is not only a welcome break each week to not have to worry about the calories, but to be able to have a few beers and eat in a nice restaurants without gaining weight is fantastic! So far this week, beers and yummy stir fried spicy food included, I have been able to fulfill my goal of 2 pounds a week. I sit now at 256, 1 pound away from this weeks goal and I know I will hit it tomorrow. In fact, based on Fitday's weight loss graph I am still more than on track with hitting my ultimate goal weight by my birthday, being Augist 1st. The weight on my ticker is not my ultimate goal weight by the way, thats just when I go buy a few new clothes. Fitday says if I lose 2.3 pounds per week I will hit the ultimate goal by then, but only 1.7 pounds per week to the goal I am beginning to suspect will be enough. Especially since in March and April I have been averaging 3 pounds a week!
Go figure, 3 pounds a week going away, but I still drink beers and eat yummy things, including birthday cakes, ice cream and such.
I was digging through my old pics last night. Since I have already hit my first goal of getting back to my wrestling weight, I thought I would have a look at myself back then. Wow. What a difference! Even though I am at the same weight, the body looks soooooooo much different!!! My weight was completely centered around my waist! Upper body size was minimal. Now however it is a different story. My arms, shoulders and chest are much more defined and have much better shape to them, also my belly is substantially smaller. The biggest change though has been my face. Amazing how round and pudgy it used to be. I am building a collage of my weight loss journey since coming to China. I can't wait till this summer to have a real "after" picture to add to it. It's going to be HOT!!!! Wooooooo!

Sorry ladies! I am taken!
I was saying to a friend of mine on MSN last night how I have made some fundamental changes in my life and attitudes that have really made the difference. We were talking first about running. My whole running journey is such a big deal to me. For most of my life I argued that fat people like myself are never meant to run, and even if I were completely skinny, it would still be a bad idea. I truly and seriously believed that. But walking was ok, so I started with that. From 15 minutes, 3X a week, to 5-10km everyday. And in that period I learned about what pain really was. I never knew what shin splints were till I read this site, and now I know what I was feeling sometimes on those walks. My lower back was also perpetually on fire and in constant agony, requiring medicinal oils and lots of soaking. Sore toes, ankles and feet that made me feel like I was doing something wrong. But I was determined. I kept going and eventually the shin splints stopped, the ankles and toes felt better and even after walking 10Km I didnt even get a twinge in my back..... Then I thought I would try, against my own advice, runnning. Same type of thing with the pains and suffering. I have been running everyday for the past 2 weeks with only one day off. I now run 6km home from work everyday and go for a run in the park on weekends with my wife. And it was the same story. Sore ankles, quads, calves, feet, back, you name it. Yesterday was the first day however, my legs felt fine. No different than after any steady state cardio type exercise. No need for soaking or oils, they felt normal. Wow. What a revelation for me! An epiphany perhaps.
Basically whats has happened with running, weight training and even just walking is I have found that "happy place" I never let myself get to before. These changes I am making are HUGE, life altering things that will improve my quality of life in the long run. But why did I wait till almost 38 to do it?
Simple..... It hurts, it aches, it pinches, it rubs, it twists and sprains and it really REALLY isnt easy. Maybe thats why I waited for the "magic pill" all my life, because I was always stopped dead in my tracks by the discomfort required to really make this happen for real. I remember vividly how many times I would start a program, then assuming the worst, the pains would come and I would quit, thinking it either was wrong or not worth it. How wrong I had been. Had I just stuck it out, sucked it up and pushed past the aches and pains, I would have been where I am now 2 decades ago. But I gave into the pain instead of pushing past it. It is hard, and it sucks big time, but the rewards I am already reaping far outweigh any pain or suffering I have endured to get here.
So how did I finally come to this epiphany? This revelation? Well, this group of course has helped me more than I can ever properly thank you all for. And even though I am not at my goal yet, it is so close, I am so focused and sooo positive, its no longer a matter of "if" I hit my goal, now it is simply a matter of "when". And the "when" part is not far off at all.
But the biggest thing that changed my outlook, and I am being dead serious, is the Biggest Loser tv show. I know there are mixed feelings about this show. Some love it, some hate it. It is unrealistic for average people to have such incredible and fast success, and mine does not match the contestants at all. But it does give some incredible lessons. One thing every successful contestant says is that with the hard core training regime and serious in-your-face trainers, they had no choice but to work through the pain. If any of you has seen the show you will know what I mean. The contestants can be down on the floor, crying and screaming that they cant move, are too sore or the like, and they are pushed right back into it again. Now of course we are not talking physical injuries here, more mental collapse at the first signs of discomfort. Thats EXACTLY where I used to be, ready to give up at the drop of a hat. But every one of them learned that they had to push past that physical discomfort, and it would get better. And they did so well!
Last years biggest loser Asutralia winner also really motivated me. He did incredible work outside the show and came back to win it. When he was interviewed afterwards he was asked the secret to his success, he said running. He ran everyday, even though, like most of us have experienced, it REALLY sucked at first. But he pushed past it and the weight melted off... So here I am running daily like Adro, and the weight is melting off..... Go figure. I wish someone was going to give me $200,000 for this revelation, but I will be content to just look gorgeous. However, gorgeous or not, if anyone wants to give me heaps of cash feel free, as I desperately need new clothes!!!
All my life I was taught to "take it easy" "slowly and surely" "back down at the first sign of discomfort" and most importantly "accept that you are fat and unhealthy as long as you are a good person". Shocking! If being a "good person" meant dying prematurely and living a sad lonely life, I would rather be an asshole from hell, thanks anyways! I was given the recipe for failure from day one. My generation it seems was all about acceptance of our shortcomings instead of action against them. I feel ripped off and am genuinely angry about being told it was ok to be morbidly obese as long as I was a nice guy. It was not ok and I have suffered because of it. Had I only forced myself to endure that period of discomfort instead of turning to the easier "acceptance" path I might not be here on the forum today and might have had a dramatically different life.
But good or bad, here I am. Its never too late to start over, which is what I have done. I look in the mirror now and see a proud, happy and strong man. I used to only see a sad fat bastard staring back who had deep rooted fears that I would never succeed, only leave a legacy of failure. Thank god I gave myself a much needed piledriver of common sense. Not only are my goals within my reach, but I am starting to truly see the handsome and athletic man who has been hiding inside me my whole life. I have always been a very charming fellow, mostly to compensate for my weight, but damn.... Once I get the body to match I am going to be a show stopper and heart breaker.
Kudos to my wife. She chased me down when I was a big fat guy, since she saw the man inside. Luckily I wasn't running very fast back then so I was easy to catch..

She even went so far as to marry me. I explained to her how typically in western culture, getting married means "Phew, no more exercise, I got me one!" I know too many people that let themselves go because they legally have a spouse so no longer need to maintain themselves. But she is getting a younger and stronger and fitter man by the day. And she is such a good woman I am thrilled to be able to be all that for her.
Being the best daddy and husband possible has done for me what just "doing it for myself" or "accepting myself as I am" never did. It taught me sometimes life hurts, but truly what hurts us makes us stronger.
My magic formula is working and if it continues to work so well I will write out a detailed account of it in case anyone else wants to try. 256lbs...... 41 pounds ago this was a dream..... Now it is a dream come true. If I am this pumped and excited about 256lbs, I can't imagine how insanely happy and excited I am going to be at 220-230lbs. I fear my head will swell so big it will explode all over China. But even if that happens I can rest easy knowing it is going to be a damn good looking corpse....
sirant