the Fat & the Furious: Ferocity's Drive

Meghan - huh, cool. I'll really have to look into that. Zombie moves are so great. (Total aside, but did you know there's an adult XXX zombie movie? I'm completely serious. I've only seen previews, but it's like O.O )

Lisa - I really hope the Dozois video works for you. You could start without weights if you wanted to, and because the DVD has three very diverse levels represented, it's something you can use for a long time.

I just got Dozois's "Total Body Breakthrough Circuit Training" DVD and it's way too advanced for me. I was kind of bummed, because she's a good teacher and pretty great at cueing. I'm waiting on her 10 Minute Solutions Cardio Dance DVD. Hopefully I'll be able to keep up!

Phoenyx - I try to be open minded - I'm willing to listen to anyone's theory - but I have to admit that I struggle for patience when it comes to things that contradict science. I spent a lot of years having my religious friends shit all over me because I grew up in an agnostic household. Every issue I ever had was immediately ascribed to me not having Jesus. Free thought and science-based skepticism changed my life, giving me a weapon to fight back. I spent a lot of time, on and off, trying to force myself to believe. I've looked into everything from Hinduism to Wicca to LaVeyan Satanism to Gnosticism to Judaism (almost converted!) to the Ascension Paradigm to Spiritualism . . . it goes on and on. I also tried to make myself believe in chakras and homeopathy and a bunch of other metaphysical/new age beliefs. Every time, it when I went deeply enough into the subject, I pulled the rug out from under myself. It took forever, but I finally had to realize that nothing to me is ever going to seem as "magical" as a sunset or a nebula or deep sea fish (some of the deep water slugs are so gorgeous . . .) Part of the reason why I love these things is because they're mysterious, but they're mysteries that we can understand. I love science because it's dynamic. It's not sanctified because it's some belief that people have held for thousands of years. A good scientist expects to be challenged, to have his theories and methodology questioned. Way too many "woo" people lack this flexibility, in my opinion. They refuse to consider other points of view. Their "winning" comment is usually, "Well, you can't prove that it's not true." That argument makes my brain melt, LOL. No, I can't prove that invisible pink unicorns don't exist, but that certainly doesn't mean that they do, you know?

I'm always interested in hearing what other people believe and how they've constructed their world view. I only have a problem with what other people believe when a) they try to force it on me or b) it hurts children or c) when it's scientifically ignorant to the point where the person believing it could be hurt. (Going to Tijuana for miracle cancer cures springs to mind, as does treating diabetes with homeopathy instead of insulin.)

Anyway, I know I'm very much in the minority in the US. Being an atheist and a skeptic and childfree is actually pretty rare. I'm so lucky with my fiancé in that he's agnostic (so we can discuss religion without anyone getting offended), working on critical thinking skills (I just tripped him up with the DHMO thing last night! Dihydrogen monoxide scare for the win!), and he's more ferociously childfree than me.

I like kids, though. That's another one of those stereotypes, that CF people hate children. Some do, but a large number of them are teachers or work in day care centers. I actually like teenagers. They're in a really cool mental place and watching how hard they work on constructing their identity is always interesting. It's the infant-baby-toddler-preschooler stuff that's a total turn off for me. (Plus I'm an only child, so the idea of living with a small person who wants to touch my things and needs constant attention kind of freaks me out.)

Okay, so this was a whole post with not one mention of fitness so far!

I kind of did this and that today. I did my three Blasts, and I'm pleased that I'm a lot less scared of the stability ball than I used to be. (Last time I rolled around on one, I was a little bit drunk on martinis. Needless to say, gravity won, and only a friendly coffee table kept me from becoming one with the wall.)

I also got my Tamilee Tight on Time DVDs. WHOO! They're ten minute routines, but OMG! OW! I did the step workout last night, which is a good one: no fancy steps, but basic hard work and some squats and lunges for "fun." Today I did her "Get on the Ball" routine, and for about the first 8 minutes I was pretty sure she wanted me dead. I felt like a circus seal, lifting and lowering that ball with my legs. Crunches on the ball S-U-C-K worse than anything; my tummy was screaming, "What did I ever do to you?!" I said, "Demanded too much cake!" and kept on crunching.

I also did her "Total Body Tubing" workout. It's the first time I ever used the resistance bands I've had forever, and I had NO idea they hurt so mu- I mean, worked so well. My hips burned, burned like a California wildfire. There was a lot of breathing through gritted teeth.

I also got in about 10 minutes of belly dancing before my thighs begged for relief. I always forget just how much work the thighs do in belly dancing. So Michelle Joyce got hip bumps and figure 8s/omis/undulations (performed very badly) out of me. I drew the line at twists. My body hasn't quite figured them out yet, and I feel like I'm twisting in oatmeal.

So I went and hooped for 18 minutes instead. I like hooping because it's an excuse to get into the music and just move. I don't have to follow instructions and I sweat like a wild hog. I have a playlist of songs I like to listen to while I hoop, and I listened to four of them today before I was wiped out.

1. Little Bird - Annie Lennox (Chris Cox Mix)
2. Haunted - Poe
3. Ginger Snaps End Theme - Michael Shields (this piece of music starts slow but ends up sounding like Collide!)
4. Transylvanian Concubine - Rasputina (Yes Sir, Mr. Sir Remix)

I also did Madeleine Lewis's A.M. Stretch routine, and it was . . . painful. It had MORE downward-facing dog nonsense. It's like, with my boobs, my tight shoulders, and my tight, chunky thighs, this yoga pose was invented specifically to torment me. Why does everyone use it?! Hopefully my Yoga for Wimps DVD will have some pointers. I want to get into it because I'm mad at it now. Same with holding plank position and doing real push-up. My upper body strength is merde.

I have a bit of weightlifting to do still, and I may mess with the P.M. Stretch routine.

I've also got a wild idea about roller skates . . . I have a decently sized patio and grass to hurl myself towards if I wipe out. It could be fun to skate around the neighborhood once I look less like a hippo.

Food was meh (boring) today except for the teriyaki chicken bowl I made for dinner. Brown rice, skinless chicken thigh (I'm having trouble consuming enough fats, believe it or not, or else I would have used breast) and broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, and red onion. I roasted the vegetables in the oven alongside the chicken. (I had the chicken on a grilling rack with the vegetables in a "pan" made from tinfoil beside it.)

These vegetable are good and kind of different and very adaptable. I put a few spritzes of olive oil spray in the pan, throw in the vegetables, spritz with a little more olive oil, then sprinkle with garlic powder and black pepper. Then I put on the broiler (set at 415 tonight) and cook them until the broccoli has crispy-looking parts and the cauliflower is browning around the edges. You can throw them into a rice bowl, squeeze lemon or lime juice over them, toss them with whole wheat pasta, etc. You can roast most vegetable with no problem. I also like cherry tomatoes done this way as well as bell peppers (and asparagus! Yum!) If you use something like sweet potatoes, squash, or regular potatoes, you need to parboil them first so that everything is done at the same time.

This is also a great step to take when making vegetable soup. It tastes much richer if the vegetable are roasted beforehand. Then you just need broth and some beans, noodles, meat . . .anything you can think of.

I'm a huge garlic fan, and I also love roasting garlic until it's soft and buttery. It gets very mild and it seems very decadent. You can use it in a million places, like thinly spread on bread for a sandwich (very thinly!) or whisked into broth to make it a better base for soup. (You could probably also do a white bean and roasted garlic dip for vegetables that would be way healthier than some low fat ranch dip. Huh . . . I may have to play with this idea. Sage? Rosemary?)

Off to lift some weights now . . . and to think about roasted garlic and white bean dip.
 
This is Going to End Badly :D

I have about 88 pounds to lose and I'm bidding on roller skates on ebay. Roller skates. I was never very good on them in the first place and I don't enjoy falling, but I keep looking at the decently-sized back patio I have and thinking how nice it would be to roller skate out there. If I learn to brake though some other means than slamming into a wall, I may even be able to skate around the block. Our neighborhood is big and safe. Of course, I'll look like a hippo at first. That's another reason to skate in the backyard. That, and if I start to fall, I can hurl myself towards the grass.

Maybe this is another facet of "things I never did as a kid." I'm also a huge fan of hooping (hoop dancing), and I tried playing with hula hoops for all of ten minutes when I was little. Now I can keep the thing up forever (going one way) and ever do some minor tricks (and keep it up about 10 minutes going the other way with no tricks. The body has a natural direction it gyrates - did you know that? I'm working hard to build up the awkward side so that I don't develop an imbalance in my muscles.)

So I hoop, I'm sloooooooowly working towards tribal style belly dance (I HATE the way undulations feel so awkward in my body), and now I'm going to roller skate . . . does this count as cross training? I vote that it does - cross training in cool. Of course, I'm keeping up with my Blasts and modern callanetics and pseudo-ballet and weightlifting . . . I'm waiting on a copy of Supervixin because it just doesn't feel like the Lessig weightlifting is doing much for me. I did finally try her DVD though (Tank Top Arms, Bikini Belly, Boy Shorts Bottom) and it's pretty good. She's a lot different than I expected. Very blonde and perky. (Tamilee Webb is blonde, but I wouldn't really consider her perky.)

As is my standard pattern, I started looking for a book about roller skating to help me out with some basic concepts. Yeah - no. The only one I found that looked remotely decent came out in the 70s. I'm still going to buy it if I win my roller skates. Hopefully it will give me a good foundation and not have too many pictures of people in ponchos and bell bottoms.

It would also be SO sweet to wear some black vinyl pants and have long hair and roller skate with a couple tricky moves while listening to Rob Zombie. There's a high potential for ridiculousness in that, but eh - I hoop to Snake River Conspiracy and Rasputina, and I dance (pseudo belly, LOL) to Collide and Abney Park.

It's one of the depressing things about workout videos - the music is almost always sheer crap. It's good for keeping a beat and little else. The Balocity DVD has "Porcelain" by Moby and "Sweet Dreams" by Annie Lennox, but the rest of it is just that semi-poppy synthesizer junk. And as much as I do enjoy experimental music and noise pop, that seems to be all they use on the Tribal Fusion DVDs. Even on some of the Gothic Belly Dance performance DVDs! It makes me crazy, because there is SO much goth music with such a sexy driving beat, and it almost never gets used. (In all fairness, Collide does get used, but never the tracks that seemed like most likely contenders. Halo? No. Wings of Steel? No. But Monochrome of all things? Sure - Tempest used that one. You can shimmy to it around the chorus, but she doesn't. Raqs Gothique doesn't include much shimmy.)

So I'm pretty excited about getting up enough strength and stamina to do Shakra's Industrial Strength Workout. They dance in knee high boots!!! The moves are a fusion from a huge number of sources, mostly belly dance and African dance with a healthy dose of bhangra. And best of all, their soundtrack is "real" music (for this kind of dancing) - Gothic industrial, with cuts from Wumpscut, among others.

I'm also waiting for some RG dancer to figure out that VNV Nation is GREAT for dancing, and that Abney Park uses Middle Eastern influences in about 75% of their songs. One of the girls in Abney Park belly dances for heaven's sake, and yet they're still overlooked.

Okay, enough ranting about music that no one else listens to. I'm going to go do some Blasts and listen to cruddy synthpop.
 
Hey Trish, is your username on Sparkpeople Ferocity too....it's asking for who referred me on the sign up page and if you get any credit I wanted to put you down.
 
Well my Ipod wasn't buried in a box....it was laying out in plain site on my hubby's spare desk. And you're not back yet....you know what this means don't you? I won't be able to get all engrossed and sidetracked in this new site and I have no other excuses so I'm going to go have to do my first on purpose non random exercise and come back after to see if you posted :)
 
LOL, YAY!!!! Yes, I'm Ferocity there too.

I really hope you love the site. There is SO much there that's so helpful and wonderful. It even eases you into the diet with steps that get emailed to you.

Let me know if you have ANY questions.

I'm so excited! Friend me right away, okay? Have a great time working out!
 
Hey Trish, that's a great site. Wish I'd known about it the year I paid for ediets because this is basically just as good if not better and its free. Unfortunately there's no diabetic plan so I'll have to stop bein lazy and make up my own menus and grocery list, lol. Thanks for the info though, its a great site ~Lisa
 
Damn, I'm sorry about that! I could have sworn there was!

Well, you could still use it for tracking, etc, if you wanted to. I feel awful for getting your hopes up!

I actually don't use any of their diet plans; I just log my own food. (I never know if I'm going to want what a given plan has for a particular day.)
 
That's ok...doing Atkins is pretty simple. My problem is just getting started. Plus I'm really not wanting to do induction again ;/ So I was trying to decide whether to just skip it but at this point I just need to START and then if I decide to switch gears no biggie. No matter what I do I'm going to have to limit the sugars and watch the carbs so I might as well start with what I know and go from there.

And as far as exercise this is the hardest time I've ever had with that. I was able to do ten minutes tonight :(. I think I may just have to try some low impact aerobics or straight outside walking until I'm not too fat for the machines anymore. Frustrating because in the 200s I never had a problem exercising. Of course that was 7yrs ago and I'm over 300lbs now so...yea.

I think that's going to be a huge milestone for me, when I can easily do 30 minutes of exercise again. Strange the things we take for granted.
 
But the point is that you did it for 10 minutes. You started and that's what matters. Next is just keep going. Maybe 10 minutes and 15 seconds tomorrow. It'll get better. The first few days are always hell.

Same with the food thing. It's just a matter of starting. Do what you can and do a little more every day. That's it!

It's gonna be all right. One day at a time and don't beat yourself up, because today is what you know you have. I don't remember who said it, but it was (paraphrased) "All you have is now. Everything else is history or fantasy."
 
Hey Ferocity,

One thing you might look into for bad knee days is Pilates.

NO, YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BOUNCE ALL OVER THE ROOM TO GET GOOD EXERCISE!!! I have a cracked kneecap, and my exercise programs that I use are fabulous. I like: Winsor Pilates, Yogalates, Crunchless Abs. These are all core-centric exercise programs that get your core engaged and take the pressure off your legs.

Building up your exercise level takes a little time. Here's what I do: First I walk on the treadmill to warm up (Ok, that was when I could still WALK, but let's not get mean about my current state of gimpiness! lol), then either do dumbbells (small ones) with arm exercises or do Pilates. Then I do about 20 minutes on my Total Gym. I try to stretch well at least once a day, and now I'm adding more yoga. I'm NOT a bouncy exercise person, but doing weight training and weight bearing exercise with an engaged core is as effective, and less stress on the body in the longrun.

Dancing is the only place I allow myself to be 'bouncy' and that is strictly controlled! :) If you want a list of the videos I like best, just holler.
 
Back in Fighting Form​

The past couple days have been a little bit blah, hence the lack of communication. I've hardly been writing, and I'm sure that's what set off my brief little anxiety attack. I still exercised and watched what I ate, even though it was like swimming through molasses to do it. I wanted some fried chicken and a damn Coke like wow. (Coke is one of the things I'm missing the most - how sad is that? Glorified sugar water! Like I'm a stinking hummingbird or something . . .)

About three days ago, I got a little note on SparkPeople telling me that I'd gone "significantly over" my allotted number of calories to burn and that I should adjust my calories up. I mostly do circuit training videos, or evil, evil calisthenics (Bar, Berk, Squeeze) so I guess I might actually be burning as many calories as their program thinks. However, I'm going to keep an eye on how many pounds I'm losing. If it start going down hella fast, then I'm not eating enough.

Last week, I lost three pounds. It's one more pound than is recommended for safe weight loss, but I think I can cut myself as break seeing as that was my first full week of kicking my own ass.

So -

Weight: 207.5 - 204.5
Neck: 15" - 15"
Waist: 37" - 36"
Hips: 47" - 46"

That's pretty damn good. This week, I'm going to try to prove to myself that I don't need to work out three hours a day in order to lose weight. My knees have been bitching. It's not bad, but I can see how there's the possibility that it might become bad.

One of the biggest things I'm doing that's going to help (despite being soul-searingly tedious!) is doing the strength training workout from Dr. DiNubile's Framework. The whole idea behind the working is balancing every exercise with it's opposite lift, then a stretch for the whole muscle group. Even better, there are about 20 exercises in the back that either modify the exercises he suggests or can be added on to help with problem areas. I already know from experience that leg extensions make me want to climb the walls, but he has an alternative that feels every damn bit as effective without the grating, aching knee. What's even cooler is that he has a version of his workout for gym or home, with the home version using free weights and elastic tubing. Sure, I have to sit in the closet with tubing looped over the bar to do lat pulldowns, but it sure as hell beats the gym.

I don't gym. I hate the gym.

He explains that if you have weak knees, you need to strengthen the muscles around the knee to help support it - there's a lot of abducting and adducting my poor, sizzling thighs with this workout. But if it means that I can belly dance, then I guess I'm going to have to deal with it.

So this morning I went through all my cardio (Mallett's Total Body Cardio Blast A & B, Upper Body Blast A and Pick Your Level: Fat to Firm) watching my knees. I made sure my butt did most of the work in squats and I made all my lunges mini-lunges. Mallett is crazy about super bouncy one minute cardio intervals, so when she goes all nutty with pretending to jump rope or doing split lunges, I grab my hoop and whale on it for the full minute. (And WHOOOO, I am finally getting good enough that I can to a minute to the left [my normal direction] and a minute to the right [makes my body feel cross-eyed.]) If I hoop hard, I pant like a dog, especially if I hoop incorrectly and use my torso to sling the thing around instead of working through my knees. I ended my workout without aching knees today, so I'm hoping this will be a solution.

I'm also tweaking my eating habits a little bit. I finally broke down and bought Tom Venuto's ebook, and I'm going to try his diet. I'll still be posting nutritional information on SparkPeople, and staying within their ranges, but I'm going to try some of Venuto's suggestions. (Like 5 small meals a day always with lean protein and fiberous carbs, eating heavier meals in the morning and tapering towards evening , and maybe even "zig-zagging" my calorie intake. Maybe.)

Are there any protein bars that aren't crappy? I have solid class hours from 8 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. on Monday and Wednesdays, so I need to sneak a meal in there. It's going to have to be a bar or a shake. I looked at Ensure, but the ingredient list make me cry. Muscle Milk came highly recommended, but the same source also said that it tastes pretty ghastly. I'm leaning towards Luna bars, because I'm a total sucker for marketing. Besides, who wants to drink a room temperature shake? Blech!

Amira - I have Pilates for Wimps sitting on my coffee table, just begging to be used. (I also got Yoga for Wimps, which is a great video. I'm going to review it later.) I'll definitely want to hear your recommendations, but I know I'm going to have to build up to them. My core strength is a joke right now; I think I do the calisthenics DVDs out of sheer willpower and nothing more.

Usually in the morning, I warm up (I like Mallett's warm up, and seeing as I have to see her face 6 times a week, it just makes it easier to already have the DVD in), stretch (sometimes with Tamilee Webb, sometimes without, but using the stretches I got from her), then I do my Blasts which change from day-to-day and total 18 minutes, then I do one of my DVDs (or two if I feel feisty, but that's not going to be good for me in the long run). Most of my DVDs include a cool down, and I stretch more at the end. I deviate from this on school days, because I already have to get up at 4:00 a.m. to get in the Blasts and maybe some hooping or one or two of Tamilee's Tight on Time workouts.

Right now, I'm just struggling to find a balance between this health thing, school, and writing. I'd drown if I had to work too. (I get tuition assistance.)

But the writing things is important. My body feels great from the eating right and the working out, but because I haven't written for so long, my emotions are on a roller coaster right now. I just need to suck it up, do my run to Trader Joe's, come home, and hit the notebooks.

I'm telling you, getting hot and getting published are going to happen hand in hand. The universe wills it and stuff. (Okay, not really. I will it, and I can be a mean little bitch.)
 
Wow...that part about the sparkpeople note had me laughing. I just sat there thinking if I ever got an email saying "you're burning too many calories, eat more" I'd probably go into shock, lol. I should use them and make that my goal....to get that note :D

Anyway I just came by to say hi :) Sorry you're feelin blah, those days suck. Sometimes I watch a good comedy and that helps...long as it's not "stupid" funny because then I'm not amused at all and I just feel more pissy, lol
 
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Changing It Up

Thanks, Lisa. It was a shock to me, because I felt like I wasn't doing enough. I still think the program may be overestimating my calories burned, so I'm not worrying about it much. As long as I'm losing 1 - 2 pounds per week (and no more), it's all good.

So anyway, I've been doing the strength training presented in Framework. Now don't misunderstand me - it's a very good, very helpful book. I've had to ghetto-rig some things so I had "equipment" but overall it seemed very well-planned and 100% geared towards balancing the body and strengthening the frame as promised.

Except I hate doing it. Music doesn't help. Getting up and getting it "out of the way" doesn't help, because the whole time I'm thinking, I just have to do this again day after tomorrow.

My biggest problem with weight lifting is the sheer, numbing boredom of it. When I was doing the program presented in Lessig's book, it was boring but it was only six exercises. I still dreaded it, but I did it. The Famework routine includes a session of stretching and strengthening with body weight before the weight lifting (and more stretching) and it recommends 10 - 30 minutes of light cardio beforehand to warm up. It was taking me an average of 2.5 HOURS to complete the routine. I didn't feel good afterward either; just pissed and ready to devour a yak.

This isn't really the book's fault. It's my fault because my learning curve when it comes to boring stuff is almost a flat line. I have ADD and I don't take medication for it. (I didn't get diagnosed until this year, and at 29, I don't want to start taking meds. I'm also scared it will affect my writing, and my writing comes before anything else.) So the ADD plus the "orderly progression of exercises all with reps that must be counted" was driving me batshit insane. I stalled on starting it until early afternoon and then it felt like I'd been doing it ALL day.

Overall, this had a really crappy impact on my psyche. My writing production was going down and I could feel myself getting that "going to cry" feeling like Dane Cook talks about. (He's abrasive as hell, but he's very good at finding the sadistic humor and melodrama in ordinary, boring situations.)

I've also been dealing with insomnia. It's something I've struggled with my whole life. If I don't catch one of those "waves of sleep" I'm up for another three hours. Before school on Wednesday, I lay awake for almost 5 HOURS. So when my alarm went off, I decided I wasn't exercising before school. I slept another hour (bringing the grand total up to a whopping two hours) and decided that I could cut French. Another hour, then I got up, did my Blasts, showered, went to school . . . and there was NO PLACE to park. Seriously, people were parked in fire lanes, in the grass, on the sidewalk . . . and there were about 20 cars circling, looking for a place to park.

I'm not a competitive person by nature, especially over something like a parking space. Couple that with three hours of broken sleep, loathing a massive part of my exercise routine, and not writing - and I burst into tears and drove home.

ZOMG meltdown.

Normally, I am not that fragile or melodramatic. I texted Dan and let him know what happened (so he wouldn't have to find out later that I didn't go to school and launch into Lecture!Mode) and got a frantic phone call about 10 minutes later, during which he tore into me (though gently), "You're overdoing it! You weren't like this before you started exercising and something needs to change!

When your fiancé, who is almost 9 years younger than you, thunders at you like a mini-Zeus, you tend to listen.

But I decided to argue my routine like an addict first. I have to do this because of that. If I don't do that I won't be to do such-and-such down the line. We got off the phone on a less thundery note, but with me determined to take a close look at what I was doing and make changes if I could.

Now, the point of lifting weights is resistance training, right? So as I've discussed before, I like doing the Bar Method, Lotte Berk Method, and Squeeze DVDs. They take advantage of your body weight and use it to make your muscles melt. Which would be . . . resistance training, a la calisthenics.

Okay . . .

Also, almost all my DVDs are a mix of cardio and toning - in other words, using weights to add resistance (there's that word again.) Usually, I'd use very, very light weights (1 or 2 pounds at most) because, hey, I also had a strength training routine. Why use heavier weights and risk over-training?

In the words of Doctor House (my hero) "Duh!"

Between the calisthenics and the circuit training DVDs, I'm already DOING strength training. The Framework routine is just slapping more on top of that, hence resulting in hysteria, over-training, and bawling over a parking spot.

Since I hate lifting weights and counting reps, but I love my circuit training and calisthenics DVDs, guess what's going?

I called Dan to tell him the good news, and he said, "Well duh, Honey! I love you, but duh!" I love Dr. House, but he never says he loves me, which is why I'm keeping Dan.

I felt better as soon as I made the decision. I woke up 20 minutes before my alarm today, at 5:40 a.m., and got up. I have my routine planned out for the day, and I'm doing a Bar Method DVD.

The only downside is a minor revision of my goals. I have to consider letting go of the Linda Hamilton asskicking look and going more for the Milla Jovovich asskicking look.

Actually, that's more than okay. Milla is pretty damn awesome and she's a model for pete's sake. (Who is Pete? Why do we say that?) I mean, to be honest, I have such a girl crush on her that I'll even watch Zoolander. I'm a huge fan of the Fifth Element and I even listen to Milla's band, called Milla. (It isn't bad.) In fact, um . . . it's the whole reason why I use L'Oreal. My lipstick color is "Milla's Plum" and . . . maybe I should have thought about all that before the Linda Hamilton thing . . .
 
I've also been dealing with insomnia. It's something I've struggled with my whole life. If I don't catch one of those "waves of sleep" I'm up for another three hours. Before school on Wednesday, I lay awake for almost 5 HOURS. So when my alarm went off, I decided I wasn't exercising before school. I slept another hour (bringing the grand total up to a whopping two hours) and decided that I could cut French. Another hour, then I got up, did my Blasts, showered, went to school . . . and there was NO PLACE to park. Seriously, people were parked in fire lanes, in the grass, on the sidewalk . . . and there were about 20 cars circling, looking for a place to park.

I'm not a competitive person by nature, especially over something like a parking space. Couple that with three hours of broken sleep, loathing a massive part of my exercise routine, and not writing - and I burst into tears and drove home.

ZOMG meltdown.

I've so had days like that where you're already tired, get to class, can't find a parking spot....and yea I did the same thing. I was so overwhelmed that even though my drive to campus was 45 minutes I turned around and went home. And I haven't had insomnia in a long time but my schedule alone causes sleep deficits and once I'm woke up, I'm up.



Since I hate lifting weights and counting reps, but I love my circuit training and calisthenics DVDs, guess what's going?

I called Dan to tell him the good news, and he said, "Well duh, Honey! I love you, but duh!" I love Dr. House, but he never says he loves me, which is why I'm keeping Dan.

I have so much admiration for your workout routines and how much you do, which is more than most people. But I'm so glad you found a solution you can live with and are not gonna be overdoing it, nice work :) Hope you give yourself credit because I can't even imagine getting up to the level of workouts that you do. And your Dr. House comment...HILARIOUS....glad you're keeping Dan, lol. Does Dan know about the competition though if Dr. House ever looks your way?
 
Lisa, I told Dan about your comment. He burst out laughing and said to let you know that he has a plan. He's going to kick out Dr. House's cane and then bury his head in painkillers. House will be so busy swallowing them that Dan will be able to take me away.

So for the sake of poor Dr. House, I must never let him love me. Seeing as I can a) accomplish that by breathing and b) never enter a parallel universe, the good doctor should be safe.

In all honesty, I exercise as much as I do because something in me snapped and decided that it loved it. Honestly, it's a cumulative effect. Every time I do a workout, I can feel how much stronger I've gotten and how much I've improved. New workouts mean new challenges, and in some cases, new obstacles to overcome. (For example, Tracey Mallett has high impact intervals in about 40% of her blasts. If it's a move I can't do because my knees won't tolerate it [and there's no way to modify it] then I grab my hoop and use it for the minute she's got everyone hopping. I keep it right next to me so I can throw it around my waist at once. Doing this has also forced me to train myself to hoop the opposite direction, because I don't want to hoop my waist lopsided, you know?)

But I honestly think this is why I like videos better than anything else. For me, a machine is just a machine. You can go a little bit longer or a little bit faster. With a video, I can use heavier weights or get better at a piece of choreography or get through a set without pausing or reach a little bit further. Getting started was the hard part. Now I think I'd go batty if someone tried to make me stop.

I also make sure to get beginner's videos so that I don't get discouraged.

And thank you SO much for mentioning that you too get overwhelmed by parking at college. I thought I was being a sideshow, but it makes me feel so much better that it upsets you too.
 
LOL!!! Poor Dr. House, he has to go without ever knowing what it is to love Ferocity or risk the wrath of Dan. Tell Dan I loved his awesomely devious plan, and was a tad scared, lol.

And that's great about the exercise...I really used to enjoy my cardio and the gym once I got there. I'm hoping to get to the point where you're at once I drop more weight...that I actually enjoy it. The sheer weight factor making things difficult is I think a big factor. But I just keep telling myself it'll get easier...I remember 40lbs ago it was vastly different than now and not half as painful so I'm pluggin away.

And yea you are so not alone. I listen to John Tesh on the way to work sometimes, that "intelligence for your life" and he was talking about what lack of sleep can do to us. I forget the percentage exactly but I think he said lack of sleep can cause us to be 60% more emotional and inable to cope with stress. He was also saying how men are more angry when they first wake up because and explained why but darn it if I can't find it. But anyways while looking I found another where he was saying stress makes you more tired because of the hormones that it releases.

Anyway my long about way of saying take exhaustion, add to that being stressed, then top it with something that should be so simple as just trying to find a parking place and get to class on time, yea recipe for disaster. And why is it when we're already tired THOSE have to be the days nothing goes right? I know some people would argue that you just notice the bad stuff more but I've had some whopper days when I really can't handle it and I'm sure I didn't miss all that on a good day, lol. This is a stressfull day and age for women for sure, we're expected to do it all, and with a smile on our face. It's no wonder we need happy pills, lol.
 
You're not alone in the 'freaking out because I can't find a parking spot' department... been there! I have very little patience sometimes, and it can lead to anxiety. :banghead:

Hope everything is going well.
 
Hey lady looks like you are making huge strides!! 3lbs thats great!! Plus inches!! Your workout schedule is crazy, I wish I had that much time to workout I would be in heaven!!

I too have freaked about parking, and have been late to tests because I couldnt find a spot... now I just park at a friends house and ride my bike to campus... its much easier and I am ALWAYS on time!!

Keep up the hard work lady! You are DOING THIS!!! :)
 
Hey Trish....where are you? lol I hope you just got busy and everything is ok otherwise. Drop me a line when you log on again. ~Lisa
 
Hey Trish -

How's you? :)

Did you get the things I sent?

And, if you need help for sleeping, just let me know. I have a miracle cure. If it worked for me, it can work for anyone. Just holler and I'll give you the low down on it.

Amira
 
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