The Diary of Madness

Interesting about the running and improving... I assume you eventually hit a sort of "plateau" hehe.

Hmm, honey and cottage cheese... will try!

Otherwise, carry on running! :)
 
Ok, not such a good week. I met my weight goal but I think it's a false low from dehydration (meaning I drank too much...). We'll see what happens over the next week.

Diet:
  • 1600 calories a day ACTUAL: 1773. A little too much, but not really all that bad
  • 20% protein, 15% fat, 65% carbohydrates ACTUAL: 14% protein, 27% fat
  • Only drink alcohol one night a week ACTUAL: 2 nights

I did not watch what I ate at all this week. I'm surprised it came out anywhere near my goals. I had multiple days of 2000+ calories. I'm making a meal plan for this week to help me out.

Exercise:
  • 2850 calories a day ACTUAL: 2743 Not too happy with this, but it could have been worse
  • exercise class once a week ACTUAL: NO!!!!
  • walk 4 miles 5 days a week ACTUAL: exceeded

Still no class. This week was really off. Back on track!
 
Doesn't sound too bad, but always a good motivation to try and improve the next week! Good luck! :)
 
Hello Madness,

I was just reading though your diary, lots of ups and downs, but looks like you are able to bounce back. Very inspiring!

Congrats on running the 5k, thats huge! I myself am working toward a running goal and its hard... but I've heard it gets easier!

Keep up the hard work!

Cheers,
MissD
 
Hey Missdfitt, thanks for stopping by. You inspired me to re-read my diary. I suppose that's what it's here for. :p

So upon rereading the things I've written, it has made me realize that it is even less logical than I thought before to spaz out when the scale shows a few more pounds on a given day. I was so excited to get down below 200. And here I am on the verge of being below 190 but I still beat myself up about water weight! It was really good to reread this and see how far I've come in such a short period of time. I've lost almost SIXTEEN pounds in 7 weeks - over two pounds a week!

So with all these things in mind, I am completely unconcerned that I had a high weigh in today. I drank on Sunday and ate some crazy salty food - just like last Sunday - and I was a bit lower than expected on Monday and a lot higher than expected on Tuesday. So today when I was 192.2 (yesterday was 190.9), I thought to myself - huh, that makes sense!

I think I might be on my way to beating the scale mentality!

Now to get back on the right exercise track. I haven't been doing as much yard work lately and that accounted for nearly 500 calories burned a day. It's a perfect excuse to get to the gym!
 
Wow, you really have made some GREAT progress... good idea to get back into exercise... what an energy and mood booster, I tell you!
 
Ack! Two bad exercise days in a row. Back on that horse!

I was looking for something to keep track of my running times in when I found an old fitness journal of mine from 2004. I was 157 pounds and wanted to drop 7 pounds before the Capital City 10K that spring. I wrote down all my body measurements and the weights I was lifting but I can't seem to find running times! I wound up getting a hideous sinus infection that put me out for almost 2 weeks right before the race so I never ran in it.

That was less than 5 years ago. I was practically at my ideal weight less than 5 years ago. I was planning on running a 10k less than 5 years ago. I can do this!

So I've set myself up with a rather long term goal. I'm going to run in that 10k. It's March 29th 2009. I have PLENTY of time to get in shape. Wait...I might actually be on my honeymoon then. Hmmm. Ok, I'm not rearranging my honeymoon for the 10k. If I miss this one, then I'll find another one.
 
Brilliant goal, you can absolutely do it!!!

Ok, this may sound silly... I'm not sure if you're male or female??
 
Ha! That's kinda funny. I'm a girl! I wish this forum had little icons by your user name for that. You're not the only one to ask! My name is Marissa by the way if that helps you remember. ;)

Looks like I'm finally getting back on track with the exercise. Just in time for a weekend out of town where I will surely be sitting on my butt most of the time! Ah well, this things are gonna happen.
 
Hehehe, oops, had the impression you were a guy, dunno why :)

Good for getting back into the exercise. This weekend just do tiny bits of exercise wherever you can, something's better than nothing!
 
Sweet Marissa. Why is it I think Madness suits you better? In a good way, of course.

A lot of people in "real life" also call me Madness so I guess it does kinda suit me!

Ok, so went out on that weekly timed 5k again today. Wow did it feel great. Well, actually, the last 3/4 of a kilometer I thought I was going to pass out or puke or something but AFTERWARDS, it felt great. :p Last week my time was 37+ minutes. I didn't write it down before I cleared my stopwatch, but let's call it 37:30 since I know it had a significant number of seconds tacked on there. Last night was a rough night - I drank too much coffee and stayed up late with some out of town guests. I thought my run was going to suffer today. Well, I DID suffer...but not my time! I'm down to 36:03!!! So I'm going to be adding that to my updated monthly post (post 39).

Hmm...maybe I should have a link in my signature to that post...
 
Nice improvement. You could just have your personal best time on your signature and update that as it improves.
 
Awesome job on improving your time!!! I ran my first 5K on May 3, but I haven't done one since. :hangs head in shame:

My goal was also to run a 10K, and you are inspiring me to work towards that again!
 
Update - Week 8

7.21.08: (188.3) 191.1

Exercise and Calorie Consumption:

5k Time:|----36:03-----|

------|---7.14-7.20--|


Mon:--|--2496--1480--|
Tues:-|--2442--1741--|
Wed:--|--2936--1534--|
Thurs:|--2909--1485--|
Fri:--|--3062--1776--|
Sat:--|--2803--1701--|
Sun:--|--2672--2161--|

Avg:--|--2760--1697--|
Diff:-|-----1063-----|
Exp loss:|---2.1-----|
Act loss:|--+0.2-----|


Expected total loss: (10.0) 6.3
Actual total loss: 4.7


Goal (set June 20): 180 lbs by Aug 2nd. Er...definitely not making this now!

Diet:
  • 1600 calories a day 1697 - pretty close!
  • 20% protein, 15% fat, 65% carbohydrates 15% protein, 38% fat
  • Only drink alcohol one night a week two nights

Ok, I'm doing pretty crappy with the macronutrients. I think after this month, I'm going to increase my allowed fat to 20%. I just don't think 15% is very reasonable. But I'll try for the last week to hit it. And the drinking continues... :(

Exercise:
  • 2850 calories a day 2760 - not quite. I had a slow week!
  • exercise class once a week STILL NO!!!
  • walk 4 miles 5 days a week - this is 20 miles - I walked/ran about 25 this week


So weight loss isn't going so bad at all for the month, but it could be better. Last week was a bit off on my schedule and I think that hurt things. I had to eat out a lot, I was out of town and I had guests. I'm surprised I did that well! I'm guessing that I underestimated restaurant food and had a lot of sodium and that's the reason for the weight discrepancy. As long as I can muster a loss this week, I'll be fine though.

And I WILL go to a cardio class! ARG!
 
Emotional eating

I did it again. It's been a while since I last ate because of stress. May 14th to be exact (aren't diaries wonderful? :p). My fiance has been out of town for a week and that's been hard. I went on a road trip on Saturday and that was tiring. Then I had crazy nightmares Saturday night. My weight has been going up all week and for no obvious reason. So by the time Sunday rolled around, I just wanted to sit on the couch and do nothing. So that's what I did. I adjusted my eating plan for the day to accommodate my complete lack of desire for movement.

And them my mother called. I love my mom. I really do. Our relationship has improved 10 fold since I was a teenager. But she still has the ability to say things that completely crush my spirit. Normally, I can just brush off her comments, but I was vulnerable yesterday.

She is also overweight - actually she is in the obese category. We weigh about the same but I'm 5'10" and she's just shy of 5'5". When I was thinner, I tried to help her lose weight but she refuses to write down what she eats, hates to exercise and complains every last step of the way. Not fun to deal with. As I've gained weight over the past few years, she has made some really nasty comments. I know that most likely she just doesn't want me to fall into a lifetime of being overweight like she has, but she is not doing it in a way that I appreciate.

Last year she told me that I looked like my cousin. Now this might not sound that bad, but my cousin is morbidly obese. Several times, my mom told me that I was sitting or walking or slouching like her. It hurt me and I think she was trying to hurt me or scare me into losing weight. I think it was actually part of my motivation to start to lose.

Anyway, last night she called me and said she was going through the old albums on her computer to throw out old pictures that were no good. I don't even remember exactly what she said anymore, but it was something along the lines of "just a few years ago, you looked so much better than you do now. I can't believe how fat you've gotten." It's a true statement. I should have had no problem with it. But I was on the edge.

I had already had my calories for the day. But when I got off the phone with her, I started snacking. I knew I was doing it. I couldn't stop. I even got a little sick at my stomach since I had just finished dinner. But as soon as that passed, I ate more! :cuss:

I thought about it a lot today and I do realize that this is something I need to work on. It's good that it's very occasional right now, but depending on what is going on in my life, I don't want to have this become an issue again. If I am to maintain weight loss, I need to control this.
 
Dealing with Mom can be tough. You are an adult, but for some reason you still have that mentality of Momma's little girl. I can say don't let it get to you, but I know that's useless advice. You'll do fine, and when you do, it won't bother you so much.
 
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