Tamara's Diary

Okie dokie: I had 1706 calories today because I had 1/2 serving chocolate milk and a pb choco chip cereal bar for a later snack.... but I still did pretty good, I think :)
 
I was super depressed yesterday and don't know how many calories I ate, but I binge ate a lot in the evening.

So today...

I woke up at 10:30 this morning and it's about 12 now, I made myself some watermelon (1c), a ham and cheese sandwhich with mustard (1/2 slice cheese), and 1c. iceburg with mac salad on top of it to equal out to 444 calories, and I can't finish it... so I've got some leftover for later today! :)
 
This is insane! I was looking back at my diary and saw that I was at 275 before I gave up, why did I give up again? Argh! I just get way too frustrated and completely lose track of what's important.

Anyway now I'm back to 315lbs (what I was when I first found this site).

So here we go again...
Calories yesterday: 1355.
Calories today: guesstimation of 1800-1900.
 
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I was doing super good on Monday, calculating in the calories for the dinner I had planned making, but then Barbara (my mother-in-law) wanted to treat everyone to chinese buffet, and I didn't feel like staying home alone, and eating pancakes and sausage for dinner while everyone else ate chinese. I stopped when I was full, and I probably ate too many calories, and I'm lazy, so, none of them were burnt off (well we did spend a hour or so walking around at goodwill afterward). And I went to bed 3 hours after eating... you win some you lose some. I always choose the worst of times to start eating right, when I have no money to buy the foods I would like to eat.

Well, Tuesday was a little better I suppose, until dinner. I ate 2 grilled cheese, with some tomato soup around 3 in the afternoon, and then I had dinner (baked breaded chicken and some pasta with veggies in it, and from what I could tell parmesan and cheddar cheese, and I could taste butter)... No clue how many calories we're in it, because I didn't make it. Again, I ate until I was full... well, a tad more pasta then I should have had. Oh, and I had a few glasses of soda... it's hard when it's in the house... oh and like three glasses of Juicy juice cherry... I think it would be safew to say I probably ate too many calories.

And so far, today is looking bad, about a cup and a half of the leftover pasta from last night, and about a glass of soda. And it's only 9am? I was going to have some honey bunches of oats with some milk and a banana (much healthier alternative) but there was no milk... and now that I think of it, I could have just mixed it with some yogurt instead... I just wasen't thinking! Maybe I'll have that for lunch? Again, it's terribly hard when I'm not a). buying my own foods, and b). cooking my own foods. Maybe I'll dance in place to some music later today... but I feel like shit.

This first week isn't looking so good.
Looks like I may gain 5lbs instead of losing 5lbs!
 
Rest of today: I had some more leftover pasta and 3 pieces of breakfast sausage for lunch and then I had a piece of chicken drum (with country type gravy), little bit of salad, seasonded potatos, 2 pieces of corn bread and a tad bit of home made mac n' cheese.

I have no idea how many calories I've had today.
 
You might want to spend some time each morning, and plan out your food day - to make you be able tog et a better handle on your daily calories... pre-planning will be your best friend
 
Hang inthere hun and think about the future, nothing tastes as good as being thin feels, "well maybe a few things lol" just get a plan together and write it down, then write down everything you eat during a day, that way you have to be accountable for what youre doing, work out everyday even if you feel like its going to kill you, its worth it, youre going to do great!!!
 
Wow... I don't even remember the last time I had a pastrami and mustard sandwich! lol. Old diaries are weird to reread, 2007? Holy crap! lol, I could have lost so much weight since then if I had stuck with it!! I hate how I made it look like I just dropped off the planet, lol. Oh well.
 
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